CSI: Sanctuary: Chapter 8

Kristy sneezed just as a coughing fit overtook her. Nick watched her head hit the pillow from the doorway to their bedroom, her hair framing her face like a limp dish rag.

"What do you want me to do?" he asked.

"Take her to daycare."

"I can't Kristy. There's a reason it's called that. And besides, Diana said she was coming down with a cold. She won't be able to watch her either, same as you."

"Look, Nick, I don't care. Just do something. Maybe you should stay home for once."

"You know I can't. We're swamped and I'm not allowed to take vacation days right now."

"Family emergencies shouldn't count toward vacation," she said, her nose so stuffed up, the word 'family' sounded more like 'fambly'.

Nick wanted to laugh, but knew she'd only yell at him for being insensitive.

"I'll take her with me then." The words were out of his mouth before he had a chance to think about what he was saying. Take Cara to work with him? Was that such a good idea? Never mind the fact that they dealt with hardcore chemicals and weapons in the lab, Greg was also there. His two lives were colliding enough as it was, what with Greg bumping into Kristy at the supermarket, but now his daughter...

"Take her. Maybe you can put her to work, and actually get home on time tomorrow." Her sarcasm was always biting, with a sting that took hours, if not days, to fade away. He doubted this time would be any different.

"Fine. I'll see you tomorrow." Nick turned away and headed down the hall toward Cara's bedroom.

She was sitting on her bed running her tiny fingers over the pictures in one of her books, trying to understand what was happening since she couldn't read the words yet. Nick smiled as he kneeled beside the bed so he could be eye level with her.

"Hi Daddy." Her pronunciation had gotten so much better over the last few months, but she still had a far distance to go when it came to both pronunciation and proper language. "You wead?" She pointed to the book.

"No sweetie, Daddy's gotta go to work."

Her little face fell into a frown. "Aww." Auburn curls dropped forward, blocking her eyesight.

He brushed them back behind her ear. "But, you get to come with me. Do you like that idea? You can bring your book with you."

She seemed to think about it for a moment. "You wead me there?"

"Maybe on my lunch break. Ok? Come on, let's get some of your things packed up."

Cara nodded and struggled off the bed, reaching for the small backpack that was on the floor.

As they left the house, an image of a shocked, angry Greg filled Nick's mind. He hadn't seemed too upset over running into Kristy, but this would be entirely different. What if he hated Cara? What if he never wanted to see Nick again? He snorted. That was stupid. Months later Greg still had her daycare information on his refrigerator.

But Cara represented the relationship Nick had with someone else, even if it was tenuous. Greg hadn't interacted with her, or even seen her, since they'd started... what were they doing? Having sex, yes, but it was so much more than that, he just didn't know what to call it. And maybe once Greg finally saw her, he'd realize he didn't want to get mixed up in Nick's crazy life. Maybe he'd feel it was ruining his own. After all, there were other men out there without kids to bog them down.

Well, he had no choice now. At least there were others at the lab he could count on to look after Cara if he had to go out into the field.

"Daddy? What you think about?"

"Nothing, sweetie."

He pulled into his parking space beside Greg's Jetta and helped Cara out of the car, his breath hitching. His hand innocently brushed against the cool silver metal of the other car and butterflies began fluttering in his stomach.

Entering the building, he let his daughter run on ahead of him while he kept a close eye on her.

"Hey Judy," he greeted the night secretary.

"Nick." She smiled back.

"Cara, left. Turn left sweetie."

Cara made the correct turn and kept right on going as he jogged to catch up to the little girl. He was glad the place was nearly empty this time of night. Apparently, not all of the graveyard shift had come in yet, and most of swing had already left. He was quick to scoop her up into his arms just before they reached the breakroom. If Catherine was there he was going to ask her to watch Cara while he went to the locker room to get his gear.

But when he entered the room, he found himself face to face with Greg, sitting alone at the table with two mugs of Blue Hawaiian coffee in front of him.

A surprised look flitted across Greg's face before his usual grin replaced it.

The butterflies began to fly faster.

"Cara! Long time no see, girl. Where've you been?" He got up to see her.

She looked at him and blinked. "Who you?"

Now it was Greg's turn to blink. "What? You mean you don't remember me? We met at your very first Christmas party when you were not even a year old. Do you remember that?"

She shook her head and squirmed to get down. Nick set her on the floor and watched her climb up onto the couch.

"Nah, of course you don't. My name's Greg. I'm a friend of your Dad's. So, how old is the little princess now?" When she didn't answer he exclaimed, "Don't tell me you forgot how old you are!"

"I be three!"

"Ah, I knew it! Lucky number three."

"Daddy! Want coloring book!"

He got it out of her backpack and gave it to her along with a box of crayons. Greg handed him the extra coffee mug, their fingers brushing, as he sat down at the table.

"Kristy's got a cold," Nick explained before Greg could ask. "And Diana, from daycare, is sick too. I had no other option but to bring her here. Griss's gonna kill me."

"I can watch her for you, if you need me to. If you get a scene."

"Would you?" On the outside Greg didn't seem angry with him for bringing her to work. But on the inside? He wanted to believe Greg had a heart of gold, but they'd never talked about this so he wasn't sure.

"I'd be happy to, Nick. You know that." Greg's hand drifted down to his and held it for an all too brief moment. He pulled away, quick, when the door opened and Catherine came in, dressed in a nice black pant suit.

Before either of the men got a chance to say hi she saw Cara and was drawn to her side to see what she was coloring. The rest of the night shift filed in two seconds later, minus Grissom, and Nick found himself bombarded with questions about his daughter: What was she doing there? How old was she now? Had she started school yet? Someone asked how Kristy was and if she still working at the salon. Anything anyone could come up with they were asking.

Cara ignored them, burying her nose further into her coloring book and their attention eventually refocused on Nick. While he was busy trying to field all their questions, Greg quietly refilled his mug with the last of the Blue Hawaiian, put his own mug in the sink, and grabbed the backpack from the table.

"I've got her, Nick," he said, catching Nick's eye as he lead her out the door.

In his lab, Greg found a stool and plopped the little girl at an empty table with her coloring book.

"Why's Daddy not here?"

"Because Daddy has to work."

Greg sighed at the mess the day shift tech had left behind and began cleaning up the beakers and test tubes.

"But you be woking."

He chuckled. A few minutes ago she'd had the 'r' sound down. Now, it seemed to escape her memory.

"Yeah, I am. But you know what?"

"What?"

"Your Daddy works outside of here a lot. And where he works he can't take little people like you. Or me, for that matter."

"Why's that?"

"Cause it's too dangerous, that's why."

"But he can go there?"

"He has to. It's part of his job." Greg finished moving everything over to the counter beside the sink and turned to the little girl, his eye catching a glimpse of a black t-shirt and tight jeans hurrying down the hall. "Speaking of Daddy."

Nick breezed in a moment later. "Greg, I owe you one, big time."

"We've been over this before. No you don't."

Nick turned to his daughter. "Alright, sweetie, I've gotta go. But I promise I'll come see you the moment I get back. Ok?"

"Ok." She put down her red crayon and wrapped her arms around him for a big bear hug.

Just as he was about to leave, Greg intercepted him. "Be safe... for both of us."

"I will."

Then Nick was gone.

Nick walked down the hall in the direction of the DNA lab, several bags filling his arms. Warrick wasn't too far behind him carrying evidence for Hodges in the trace lab.

"Oh God..." Nick stopped in his tracks and Warrick nearly bowled him over.

"Nick, what the hell man?"

Through the window he could see Greg sitting in one of the overstuffed arm chairs from the breakroom. His daughter was curled up in the man's arms, apparently sound asleep. He couldn't help but think Greg would make a good father. He needed a camera... but knew he couldn't take the picture. He'd just have to do his best to remember it.

"Aww, look at that. It's too bad you're not gay and single Nick. Looks like they're really getting along there."

He shot Warrick a nasty look.

"Oh sorry. Not really cracking homo jokes. I know you love Kristy. I was just saying..."

"I don't hate gays, Warrick." The hair on the back of his neck stood up, anticipating something not so pleasant in the near future.

"I didn't mean to insinuate..."

"How's your new girlfriend?" Nick interjected to change the subject, feeling his skin grow warm with anger.

"Tina? Oh she's fine... very fine." Warrick's voice took on what he assumed was his bedroom tone.

Greg chose that moment to look up. He saw Nick, and a small smile flickered across his face.

"I think he's got a crush on you. I've seen him making you coffee. He's always here waiting for you before shift starts. And he didn't just smile for any old reason. He saw you. Nick, you're going to have to do something about that. I mean, you're married. Maybe he's not the right person to be acting as babysitter."

What the hell did Warrick know? If he'd been paying that much attention to Greg, then surely he must have noticed that Nick was playing along. He knew nothing.

"He doesn't have a crush on me," Nick said through gritted teeth. "He might not actually be gay in the first place. Keep thinking about Tina and stay out of my love life, please." He stepped into the cool air of the DNA lab, letting the door shut behind him with a small hiss, already feeling the calm descending upon him from Greg's mere presence.

Greg stood up and gently set the sleeping child back in the comfy chair. "What did you say to him?" he looked concerned, swiveling his head from Warrick still standing out in the hall to Nick, now in his lab.

"Nothing," Nick sighed. "How's she been?"

"Perfect kid. She's been running this place for me. I've just been her slave all along."

"Yeah, she is a good kid."

"You're very lucky, you know that?"

Nick nodded, unable to tell Greg the ultimate truth: He was lucky, though not just because of his beautiful daughter. He'd never thought about the three of them as a family before, but just the inkling of the idea sounded perfect. He could easily imagine himself waking up next to Greg every afternoon, not getting bitched at all the time for the smallest of things, and not having to choose between spending his time with his lover or his daughter.

He pushed the thought out of his head. Cara needed her mother, no matter how much of a bitch she could be at times, and he wasn't about to take that away from her. No matter how much Greg made him happy, he had to think of his daughter first.

"Nick?" Greg's voice brought him back to reality.

"Yeah?"

"What were you thinking about? Bad case?"

Nick shook his head. He couldn't keep the truth from Greg. "No, Warrick said something about you having a crush on me and that maybe you weren't a good choice as babysitter because I'm married. That's all."

"I didn't mean to look at you like that. I just..."

"It's not your fault." His anger rose once again, this time even closer to the boiling point. "Is he still out there? I'm gonna go set him straight."

"Nick." Greg stepped forward and grasped his arm. "Stop. You don't know what you're saying. Besides, he's gone now."

"I'm tired of hiding who I really am."

"That doesn't mean you can just go blurting things in the heat of the moment. These things have consequences."

Nick pulled out of Greg's grasp, trying desperately to stop himself from trembling.

"Listen to me," Greg continued. "If you want to divorce Kristy, if you've thought about it long and hard enough, and you're sure about it, then that's fine. You know I'll support any decision you make, but don't go blurting things until those decisions have been made. Alright?"

Why did Greg have to be right? He didn't want him to be. He wanted to be out with his friends, wanted them to know the truth. But Greg was right. He shouldn't do anything rash. It would only make things worse.

"Yeah, alright," he mumbled.

"Can we talk about this further next time you come over?"

Nick, needing someplace else to look, let his eyes wander around the room until they'd landed on his daughter, her eyes gently closed, a complete picture of innocence. "I don't want her to lose her mother," he said, voice in a near whisper, as if he didn't really want to say the words. Did he? He wasn't sure, but repeated them anyway, "She needs a mother, she really does."

"Ok. That's fine." Greg turned back toward one of the tables, picking up a sample Nick had dropped there upon his entrance.

"How did you get her to fall asleep? Usually it's not very easy."

"She asked me to read that Alphabears book. Claimed it was her favorite bedtime story. She dropped off after the first few letters."

"She did?"

"Yeah. Why?"

Nick was blown away. "She hates it when Kristy reads it to her. She'll only let me read it. If you could do that, I think you'd make a good father, G." he didn't even realize what he'd said until after the words were out of his mouth. But they were true, and he couldn't hide the truth.

"Don't say stuff like that."

"Like what? That was a compliment."

"No. No, it wasn't. And you know it." When Greg turned back around he saw the hurt in the other man's eyes. What the hell? "You know how devoted to you I am. You know I don't see anyone else. You tell me I'd make a good father. Fine. I might even like that. But what other chance am I going to get?" He was obviously upset, and Nick was confused, still wondering what he'd said to set him off. "Dimwit, you just told me she can't have two fathers. What am I supposed to say to that? If you're just going to contradict yourself, don't bother complimenting me ever again."

Oh, shit. How could he have been so stupid?

"I'm... I didn't mean... G..."

Greg turned his back on him. "Don't bother apologizing either. I'm not in the mood to hear it."

"Nick?" Catherine poked her head into the lab.

He turned, body almost jerking with the movement, to see her in the doorway.

"Warrick's looking for you."

"Yeah, um... tell him I'll be right there."

"Oh, don't bother. Nick was just leaving."

"What?" He looked back at Greg. "You're kicking me out?"

The lab tech looked over his shoulder and when he spoke, his tone was cold as ice, "It's my lab, and I have work to do. Unless you don't feel like solving your case tonight. If that's what you want, then you'll have to explain to Warrick why half the evidence is missing."

Fuck. It was bad enough when Kristy was pissed at him. That was a regular occurrence. But Greg? His lover's words stung his heart like no others ever had. His life was doomed.

"Come on, Nick. It looks like your dead body used to be the prime suspect in my case from last night. Let's go."

Grudgingly, wondering what he was going to do to make things right with Greg, he took one last look at Cara, still sleeping soundly in the overstuffed chair, before following his coworker to the layout room. How she ever managed to sleep so well was beyond him. She must have gotten it from her mother.

"What happened, Nick? I thought you two were the best of friends?" Catherine asked once the lab door was closed.

"I guess we're not."

"You're not gonna tell me why?"

"Just an argument. That's all."

Catherine turned to face him. "If it was 'just an argument', Nicky, you wouldn't be saying your friendship is doomed."

"Maybe it's not. I don't know."

She huffed out a sigh and turned to continue down the hall, her strawberry blonde hair swinging back over her shoulder. "Men."

When the end of shift came around, hours later, Nick found Cara in the breakroom with Greg, her backpack all packed up and ready to go.

"Daddy!" She jumped up and down to get into his arms.

He picked her up. "Thanks, G." The words were harder to say than he'd thought they would be, viewing their argument earlier, but he knew he had to say something. He couldn't lose Greg. Greg was the glue holding him together.

His lover gave him the cold shoulder as he brushed past him.

"Greg, don't do this."

But it was already too late. The other man was out in the hall walking at a brisk pace toward the front of the building.

"Why he mad?" Cara asked.

"It's a long story. Come on, let's get you home and see if Diana can take you for the day, alright?"

"Ok."

He'd been stupid. Couldn't Greg see he hadn't meant to say it like that? His heart, mind, body, hell, even his soul had been in an emotional turmoil for the past few months. Sure, he had fun with Greg, enjoyed the sex, and the emotional support from the other man, but that didn't make his life any easier. Couldn't Greg see all that? Couldn't he take just one second out of his day and understand his feelings for a moment? Why did Greg have to be so thick headed?

"Daddy? We go home now?"

He blinked. "Yeah, sure. Right. Let's go home."