Well. Here we go again. This ones an actual story, not a list~

AFTER THIS IS THE FINAL INSTALLMENT! WOOHOO! WE'RE SO CLOSE!

Also, I listened to Sexy Back while writing this. It just made it all THAT much funnier.

So. Yet another epic year with the trio of Hogwarts.

Anyway, so Harry, upon the beginnings of this year, is all like "FUCK IT I'M GOING EMO! DAMN THIS SHIT TO HELL!" and Hermione's all like "If you go emo I will bitch slap you and tell Ginny you wear tampons, NOW GET YOUR ASS OUT THERE AND SAVE THE WIZARDING WORLD AGAIN!" With all her authority (believe it or not, she has a LOT) and Ron's like "Yeah! What she said!" and shit.

So Harry's like "damn..." but goes and saves the world yet again. Sort of.

So this year there's this huge ass teacher for the DADA class, and everyone's like "another one? Really?" and Dumbledore's like "JERRY, I NEED YOU TO GET MEMORIES FROM SLUGGY!" and Harry's like "IT'S HARRY, DAMN IT!" and Dumbledore's all like "whatever, just go get the money from him."

"what money?"

"money? Where?"

"you just... just said to get money from.. Slughorn..."

"No I didn't! Whatever gave you the idea?"

"Sir, you ju-"

"Perry, I will not have you accusing the paintings of pimping, now go to class."

and Harry's like "Wtf?" but goes to class anyway.

Meanwhile, Dumbledore's going through his 'Tom Memory' and shit and is all like "I don't remember saying that..." and McGonagall's just like "You don't even remember lunch you old buffoon."

MEANWHILE, Professor Greasy, also known as Snape, is currently plotting the downfall of Albus (insert shit load of middle names here) Dumbledore and going "SOON I SHALL RULE IT ALL, MWAHAHAHAHAHA!" and Dumbledore's like "I have the feeling I'm going to die soon..." and McGonagall is all face-palm and crap.

Then, for the majority of the movie Harry's like "GIMMIE THE MEMORY" and Slughorn's like "NO, MY MEMORY!" and stuff and then Harry drinks this magic lucky potion he got from the lucky charms leprechaun for five bucks (or pounds, whichever you prefer) and is all like "I'M GONNA GO VISIT HAGRID :D" and Hermione's like "NO! IT GAVE HIM ADHD!" and Ron's like "Oh no. what a shame. Whatever shall we do now?" and Hermione says "Looks like defeating Voldemort's all up to you, Ron." and Ron's like "HELL NO, GO TO SLUGGY, HARRY!"

So Harry visits Slughorn and Hagrid, because the giant spider from the second movie died and discovers Slughorn's dead fish that went 'poof' and that Hagrid sucks at singing. So then Harry gets the memory and is like "FUCK YES!" and then Dumbledore drops THIS bombshell- "HEY, TERRY, WE'RE GOING TO A SECRET CAVE THAT NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT AND WE COULD POSSIBLE DIE BUT WHO CARES? :D" and Harry's like "Shit..."

So they go to said secret cave and Dumbledore's like "and now I shall cut my hand.." and Harry's like "No, sir, let me do it, I'm emo!" and Dumbledore's like "Bitch, your no more emo than Paris Hilton, stand aside!" so Dumbledore cuts his hand and they get into the cave and he drinks this weird stuff that gives you seizures ALL TO GET THE WRONG ITEM and then they go back to Hogwarts, and Dumbledore's like "Sherri, I could die. These are my last words to you- LIVE LONG AND PROSPER!" Before getting Avada Kadavera'd off the side of the school and Harry's like "MY NAME IS HARRY FUCKING POTTER!" and shit and then he's like "aw shit, he's dead." and stuff and Malfoy's like "sad face..." and Snape's all like "YES, YES, MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I WIN! I WIN!" and everyone's like o.O "wtf?" and then Snape's like "AWAY, DRACO, TO THE BAT MOBILE!"

So, at the end of the year, there's a funeral, a missing student, no headmaster, a missing DA teacher, a fake locket, and no one to call Harry the wrong name anymore.

How tragic...

Well, look's like Dumbledore's a Trekkie~

Beware of the next one. It may not be what you think.