Re:IF Nageku [Lamenting Life in Another World from Zero]
Phuqitol
Chapter 8: That Person
Summary:
In this chapter, the matter of just what "That Person" is gets discussed, with Subaru struggling to get through to Beatrice.
Chapter Text
Subaru: [I'm confused… who is "That Person?"]
Beatrice's frown had briefly transformed into an expression of hopeful anticipation. But Subaru's confused response only made her frown return, her brow furrowing despairingly.
Bastian: [Must be related to her Mother, Subaru.]
Both of them looked to Bastian with surprise. Subaru's surprise was tinged with confusion, but Beatrice was flat out stunned.
Beatrice: [How could you know that, in fact?]
Bastian: [Only put together what little I know about you, Great Spirit. Your Mother is the only conduit of information for you that you've told us about. Put simply: I guessed.]
Beatrice looked somewhat disappointed with this response, as well. Perhaps it was too much to hope that this man knew much of anything about her Mother.
Bastian: [Great Spirit. Did your Mother provide you any indicators to look for in "That Person?" A physical description? Personality traits?]
He didn't receive an answer. Beatrice only looked sullenly at her black book.
Upon looking closer, Subaru found this black book oddly familiar.
Subaru: [Hey.. I've seen that book somewhere before…]
Beatrice: [You used to infringe upon Betty's library quite often, I suppose…]
Subaru: [No, no… somewhere else…]
The place he'd seen this book before made his blood run cold. Rather, the person who'd been holding it chilled the blood in his veins. This was partially because of the terror he'd experienced at this person's hands, and partially because of the implications it seemed to have for the book in Beatrice's hands.
Subaru: [Petelgeuse…]
He was forced to recall a failed loop where Petelgeuse had flicked through a similar black book, which he referred to as a Gospel. This realization took Subaru's fear and mutated it into anger.
Subaru: [Beatrice… why do you have a Gospel?]
Beatrice: ["Gospel?" Only those fools in the Witch Cult use those defective tomes. This is a genuine Tome of Wisdom, in fact!]
Beatrice was offended at Subaru's query. Was it possibly related to how Subaru knew this book by that name? Did she suspect that Subaru was in league with the Witch Cult, and that was how he'd known about the attack? Subaru began to panic.
Subaru: [Listen, before you get the wrong idea --]
Beatrice: [Betty knows you wouldn't join those fools, in fact!]
Subaru: [Haah…]
A deep sigh of relief. He didn't know why Beatrice trusted him enough to discount the possibility of him being aligned with the Witch Cult. He didn't care to think about it too much. He was just happy she seemed to trust him at least that much.
Beatrice: [You mentioned Petelgeuse… how is he, I suppose?]
Subaru: [Huh? He's dead now…]
The confusion brought about by how Beatrice knew of Petelgeuse bogged down Subaru's mind as he uttered the plain truth of the Sin Archbishop's fate.
Beatrice: [Geuse…]
She appeared wistful as she uttered this name. It was name that had history behind it, history unbeknownst to Subaru and Bastian. Beatrice was quick to shake off this brief reminiscence.
Beatrice: [At any rate, those so-called "Gospels" are inferior copies of the genuine article. The Tome of Wisdom in Betty's possession shows the reader the future, in fact.]
She proudly highlighted the difference between a Gospel and a Tome of Wisdom. While distracted with her explanation, enraptured by curiosity, Bastian glanced at the pages of Beatrice's Tome of Wisdom. He frowns, pulling something out from inside his haori.
It was another black book.
Bastian: [This so-called "Gospel" is full of incoherent ramblings… but that's more than what's on her book's pages…]
Beatrice doesn't even have enough time to be outraged.
Bastian: [Forgive me, Great Spirit…]
Subaru: [Beatrice... is this true?]
His question was met with a glum silence on Beatrice's part. And then…
Beatrice: [Mother never told Betty anything about That Person, I suppose… only that Betty was supposed to wait for them to take Betty from this library.]
This revelation was almost too much for Subaru to bear. Would a mother ever do such a pointlessly cruel thing to their child?
Then, a spark of inspiration took hold.
Subaru: [If the criteria for That Person is so open-ended as to be nonexistent… couldn't it be anyone, then? I mean, it could even be someone of your choosing, Beako.]
This notion appeared to deeply unsettle Beatrice, as that same look of uncertainty set back in.
Subaru: [Do you… like being alone, Beatrice?]
Silence. Sullen silence.
Subaru: [I suppose solitude does have its perks. You know, I used to be a lot like you before I arrived in Lugunica, Beako. I tended to keep to myself. Staying in my comfortable bubble, separate from the world… it was oddly comforting.]
Beatrice's eyes were cast downward towards her blank pages.
Subaru: [But… I wasn't going anywhere back then. I was living in limbo, merely distracting myself by tending to my own collections…]
He was forced to recall the figurines and volumes of manga and light novels that had adorned the shelves of his bedroom back home. Every video game left unplayed in his library, every bookmark gathering dust on his computer. It made him cringe.
Subaru: [Arriving in Lugunica gave me the push I needed to move past all of that. And what did I do?]
His fists clenched again in indignation pointed towards himself.
Subaru: [I squandered it. I ran away.]
Beatrice was now looking to Subaru as he told his tale of lament. Her eyes brimmed with curiosity, as though she were feeling some form of kinship with this young man. There was tragic hope in those eyes.
Subaru: [Please, Beatrice. Don't make the same mistake I did. When an opportunity to better yourself appears, it's always best to seize it.]
Beatrice seemed to have been stunned by Subaru speech. To think the two had so much in common, albeit on a different scale. The scaling didn't matter, though. Not really. What mattered in this moment was this sense of understanding. Even if Subaru only understood a fraction of Beatrice's lonesomeness, this was enough. It was more than most had realized. It was consoling.
Bastian: [Well said, Subaru.]
He looked to his companion as he said these simple words of praise. Bastian's eyes were closed, with a faint, pleased smile on his face.
Beatrice: [Do you feel this way, as well, Acolyte Knight?]
This phrasing caused an uncomfortable spasm in Bastian, one that lasted a fraction of a second. He shook it off that quickly. However, her question does still give him pause.
Bastian: [Solitude every now and then isn't bad… but the time spent traveling with Subaru's been some of the best in recent memory.]
Subaru: [Wait, really?]
This came as a surprise to Subaru. They'd only been traveling in the wilderness and living off the land for less than a month. It confounded him as to how Bastian could find this dreary experience so enjoyable.
Bastian: [Grew accustomed to solitude… no. Became resigned to it. If given the option not to be alone, would prefer not to be.]
He returned to his more casual, staccato method of speech. Perhaps he'd finally realized that Beatrice wasn't pleased with his show of respect? No, it was more likely he was just following Subaru's lead.
Hearing Subaru and Bastian's words, Beatrice cast her gaze back to her Tome of Wisdom.
Beatrice: [Why… why would Mother have given Betty a book that can tell the future, only for it to be blank?]
This was a critical question. It clearly had been steeping in the deepest recesses of Beatrice's mind, only just now having been brought to the surface. The question possessed such gravity that it left the room silent as Beatrice mused over it in futility. Her contemplation leads her to a woeful conclusion…
Beatrice: [Maybe it means Betty has no future, in fact…]
Subaru: [No!]
Beatrice is caught off guard by this sudden protestation, looking to Subaru as she struggles to comprehend it.
Subaru: [That's only one way you could interpret it. There's another way.]
Beatrice: [Another way…?]
Subaru: [Blank books are meant to be written in, yeah? Like a journal!]
Once more, Subaru extended his hand to Beatrice.
Subaru: [Choose me, Beatrice. Let's write that story together. No…]
He boldly shot his free hand into the air, pointing his index finger toward the ceiling.
Subaru: [Let's write a story so good, it becomes too good to be merely contained within the pages of that book!]
Beatrice appeared trepidatious at the prospect of writing such a story.
Beatrice: [But… you'll die. You'll die one day, and leave Betty behind, in fact!]
Her tears came back in full force at this realization. However, it wasn't to be a lasting realization.
Subaru: [Yeah. You're right. I won't live forever. But I won't let that deter me! Let's write a story full of happy moments, moments that make all of the misery fade away! I'll do everything in my power to make that happen, Beatrice!]
Her hand quivered as he said his piece.
Subaru: [This isn't about making up for failure anymore. It's about making things better for you. For everyone, sure, but it starts with you, Beatrice! So please.. let's write a story we can both be proud of!]
His hand remained outstretched. She could see the callouses on his hand from all of his hard work. In his eyes, she could see true care and dedication. Though he'd been a coward before, there was an actual aspiration in him to become better. This wasn't the same person who would run from his problems. This was a person who understood that running away was no way forward. Neither was secluding oneself, for that matter.
Subaru: [Choose me, Beatrice!]
Tentatively, her hand met his, as she forged a contract with this sorry young man. Bastian looked on with the faintest glimmer of astonishment in his cold eyes, a slight smile gracing his face.
Bastian: [How beautiful…]
The birth of a contract, before his very eyes. It was almost enough to make him cry. Almost.