Hello my friends! My new story! This one is a HoniMori one(Haruhi can suck it)! What happens when The Host Club finds out Honi is a stripper for rich people? Read and find out, bitchez!

Diclaimer: If owned anything, Haruhi would be a lesbian! P.S. I stole Honi's stripper name from a Lady Gaga song title, plz don't kill me Gaga!

Warning: Gayness ahead. Don't like? Read anyway. Your pain amuses me.

Mori P.O.V.

Mistkuni has been acting weird lately. For starters, he flinches slightly when he sits down. His new fashion sense includes shorts two sizes two small for him. And he now walks and talks in a manner that gives me an….erection…..(A.N. lol I make him sound like a fancy British prude! Sorry for naughtyness! I swear I'm done with such naughty words!) It's just so….weird…. He never acts this way. He's not being my Mitskuni.(A.N. For a buck fifty he might be lolz!)

So I try to take my mind off it for a while. Which works out pretty well seeing as I'm outraged that Tamaki dragged me to a strip club. He and the other hosts(besides Haruhi) are here to enjoy the show. Even Renge is hiding outside watching us through binoculars, the freakin' stalker. Although I must admit I find it ironic that the guys who spend all day entertaining young GIRLS all turn out to be gay. Well, except for Mistkuni. I was pretty sure he was straight, considering the way he looked at the girls in his class. That is, until the announcer man called out the next hoo- I mean, miracle worker(A.N. XD). 'And now, our best performer here, MoneyHoni!' My jaw dropped. That's what Honi said his stripper name would be if he was one. How do I know that? I ask naughty questions,*Blush*. And there he was, in nothing but a zebra-striped thong and cowboy boots(A.N.I have NO idea what stripper's wear, even though my friends are convinced I am one, Which I'm NOT! usually.) and a sexy grin. Look at Kyouya snickering in the back! He knew about this! Which doesn't surprise me, he's more of a stalker than Renge.

Outside

Renge pondered what she just heard from Mori's brain(OMG SHE'S PSHYCIC EVERYBODY RUN!) with her brain reading device(Nevermind she's just a rich motha with cool stuff). 'Hmmmmm…' she thought. 'If Kyouya presents a threat to my reputation as biggest stalker in school, then HE might get another picture in the year book and not me! I must DESTROY HIM!' And so Renge went to plot with her three bowls of rice.

And we're back inside! Now Honi's point of view.

I think I'm going to faint. My cousin is watching me pole dance and is getting turned on by it. I can tell because he's twitching. I bet no one would have ever guessed either. Mitskuni Honinozuka is a stripper. It's not that I like to be dirty, I just like the attention. Plus, when does one ever get a chance to pole dance in public?(A.N. I know I have that problem.) Oh well, if my cousin wants to be a perv, then let him. He's kinda cute- STOP! He's your cousin and besides, you don't NEED a man! Grr. Stupid inner monologue. Curse you, brain!

Back to Mori

I can't watch this anymore, I'm leaving. And with that I strode out of the room, only to have to come back in and get my keys.

Me: Tada! What do ya think of my story? I don't think Honi will be a stripper for long….

Mandorz: Worried someone will steal your thunder, Aunt PUSS PUSS?

Me: go away twin/best friend! Only clients get to call me that.

Mandorz: What clients?

Me: Injured ones, I'm a lawyer.

Mandorz:Suuuurre you are…..

Me: You suck!

Any way, review please! Thank You!