DISCLAIMER:
Total Drama belongs to Fresh TV and its creators. I don't own anything from the properties used in this fic.
A New Beijinging.
Last time on The Ridoncolous Race, we struck emotional gold in Dubai. Carrie gave up on the game of love, the Genius used boring math to clean windows, and it worked. While the Real Reality TV Pros showed the Pros in their name getting first place, is that or one of their opponents is cursed, helping them to win this leg.
Last but not least, The Best friends lost the challenge after Carrie took too much time to be like Devin's girlfriend. Ouch! That must sting. Who will also be stung today? Find out here in the Ridoncolous race.
Yesterday chill zone is today's starting line, and the teams will start in the order they finished yesterday. At the front of the queue, the Real Reality TV Pros were waiting.
"First place again, baby. I can get used to this," said LeShawna, dancing a bit.
"Yes, and look, this time the Ice dancers aren't behind us," said Tyler, who saw the Genius next to them. "Are those girls writing about us?"
Ellody and Mary were busy writing in their notebooks, stealing gazes of the TV pros now and then.
"Don't be silly sugar. Why would those girls write about us? They're probably doing math problems or obsessed with writing strategies," said LeShawna, shrugging.
Team confessionl: Test subjects T and L.
"Right now, besides winning the million prize to fund our research, we have started an analysis of the Real Reality TV Pros," said Ellody, writing in her notebook.
"My theory is that their behavior masks a ruthless and inexorable personality focused on getting results," said Mary smiling.
"And my theory is that they're misunderstood and poignant agents whose actions are coincidental and are actually amicable and humane," said Ellody, nodding.
Mary tapped her pen against her chin. "But there is only so much we can glean by observation alone."
"I concur. We probably need to do some field tests," said Ellody, both geniuses laughing and snorting.
"Well, it's time to say bye, bye to Dubai," said Don, waving at the camera. "Real Reality TV Pros, are you ready?"
"WE WERE BORN READY!" shouted Tyler, startling the host.
After a moment, Don recovered and raised a hand. "GO!"
Once they heard the signal, Tyler and LeShawna pressed the Don Box's top, the sista reading the tip.
"Find your next travel tip at the world-famous bird's nest stadium," said LeShawna, raising an eyebrow.
"WOHOO! Let's go!" shouted the jock, raising both arms.
LeShawna chuckled. "Sugar, do you know where this place is?"
Tyler's smile turned into a confused expression. "Actually, I don't. But maybe we can just buy a plane ticket to the stadium."
"The stadium is in Beijing, China, home to…"
"CHINA, HERE WE GO!" shouted Tyler, both he and LeShawna ignoring Don and running to the taxis.
"Yes, pretty smart leaving the host mid-sentence. I'm sure that will help you during the race," said Don, frowning angrily and crossing his arms as the Genius picked their travel tip.
LeShawna and Tyler took a taxi and arrived at the airport a little after the Genius. The teams looked cautiously at each other while running to the ticket counter. After a short and fierce race, LeShawna and Tyler arrived first.
"Note, L and T had considerable stamina and speed," Ellody wrote in her notebook, huffing and puffing. "At least better than the average Science major student."
Mary was also writing and huffing. "Which isn't exactly an exceptional feat, especially if we use ourselves as the standard."
The first eight teams, Real Rality TV Pros, Genius, Ice Dancers, Sisters, Fashion bloggers, Larpers, Adversity twins, and Police cadets ended up in the first plane. The other four teams would take off one hour later.
On the plane, LeShawna was reading a magazine while Tyler looked at the other passengers and ate some caramel popcorn.
"It seems Brody and Geoff lost the plane," said Tyler sadly, then he licked his fingers.
"Don't worry about those boys. They'll be fine," said LeShawna, smirking.
"Greetings, fellow Ridonculous Racers."
LeShawna groaned, and Tyler waved at the person standing in the aisle.
"What do you want, Leonard?" asked LeShawna, glaring at the wizard.
"As fellow rivals, I wanted to amuse you with a feat of wizardry and power," said Leonard, raising his arms while Tammy played the ocarina.
"I'm sure you're but…"
"Wow, a magic trick, I love those," said Tyler clapping. LeShawna rolled her eyes, annoyed.
Leonard chuckled. "Well then, let's do it." As the wizard rubbed his hands, a deck of cards appeared in them. He then proceeded to shuffle them. "Cards are used to read fate and as a medium to many kinds of psychic powers, as I will show you now. Pick a card and prepare to be wondered!"
Tyler quickly took a card.
"The ace of clubs," said the jock, making Tammy misplay her ocarina.
"NOOOO!" shouted Leonard, putting his hands behind his head. "You can't tell me which card you drew. The trick is that I'll use my magic to tell you which card you picked without seeing it."
"Oh sorry," said Tyler, returning the card to Leonard.
The wizard sighed. "Let's try again."
"This is silly," said LeShawna, rolling her eyes while Tyler ate more popcorn.
Leonard shuffled the cards time and again, smirking confidently, as Tammy played the ocarina.
"Now take a card, see it but don't say what card you draw," said Leonard, offering Tyler the deck.
The jock put his tongue over his lip and drew a card from the middle. He watched the card and hid it. "Done."
Leonard looked at the card that was before Tyler's card, put a finger on the jock's forehead, and began to chant.
"Magic powers that help the blind, let me read this young man's mind," said Leonard, lifting his hand and putting his finger on his own forehead as Tammy played a more dramatic tune.
"Your card is … the 7 of diamonds," said Leonard, Tammy stopping the music.
"No."
"What?"
"It's not the 7 of diamonds," replied Tyler, looking disappointed. LeShawna was trying to not laugh.
Leonard's eyes widened. "T-That's impossible!"
"Just look…"
"NO!" Leonard held Tyler's hand. "Let me try again." The wizard then mumbled some words. "The three of diamonds?"
"No."
"The Queen of diamonds?"
"It's not diamonds."
"Queen of hearts?"
"It's the jack of spades," replied Tyler, showing the card.
"Hahaha, it seems you aren't as good as you say," said LeShahwna.
"NOOOOO!" shouted Leonard, running away crying.
"Wait Leo," said Tammy, running behind him.
"Hey!" Tyler raised a hand, but it was too late. "You forgot your card."
The jock and LeShawna then realized Tyler had accidentally picked two cards.
"Oh it seems the caramel made my fingers sticky. Do you think we should tell them?" asked Tyler, looking at the second card, the seven of diamonds.
"I think it's better to leave it like that," said LeShawna, looking worriedly at the larpers.
Team confessional: Unbelievable unbelievers.
"I can't believe my magic failed like that," said Leonard, holding his head with both hands.
"Don't worry Leo, I'm sure it will work next time," said Tammy rubbing his shoulder.
Leonard shook his head. "NO! As long as they don't believe in me it will be impossible to use my magic. We need to make them believe … without magic."
Tammy gasped, looking at her teammate with wide eyes. Leonard glared at the camera with a determined frown.
The teams arrived in Beijing and ran to take a shuttle bus to the bird nest stadium. The Police cadets, Larpers, Emma, and the Ice dancers were glaring at the Real Reality tv pros, while the Genius sat behind them, taking notes.
Jen and Tom were looking at this scene with wide eyes.
"Maybe it's my imagination, but why is that team getting more attention than us?" asked Jen, tilting her head.
"Well, she is beautiful, has great style, and seems pretty confident, and he is athletic and good-looking too. I think they deserve the attention," said Tom, chuckling.
Jen smiled. "Well, we're fashion experts. There is no way we look any worse than them."
"You say it girl," Tom lowered his glasses and smiled. "And maybe I should try to give them a pair of fezes. The more contestants wearing them, the easier to bring them back to fashion again."
"Hahaha, you can always try," said Jen, laughing nervously.
The bus arrived at the stadium, accidentally hitting the Don box, which began throwing the travel tips everywhere.
The teams ran out of the bus, and LeShawna got the travel tip.
"All-in: Fly in the hole: fly over the bird's nest stadium and tandem jump through the donut hole to receive your next travel trip." Read the sista, gulping.
"Oh yeah, that sounds extreme," said Tyler raising both arms.
"And dangerous," added LeShawna.
Tyler chuckled. "C'mon Lesh, it will be fine. It's only a fall from 10,000 feet."
The sista sighed, and the teams ran into the airplane that would fly over the stadium. The contestants put on their parachutes and looked nervously at the ground, with Joseé using rock rock to give herself and Jaques some luck.
"Wow, this will be great!" shouted Tyler excitedly, looking at the stadium. LeShawna was in front of him, not as confident as her companion.
However a voice interrupted her thoughts. "I know! It will be great when we kick your butts."
The Tv Pros turned around to meet MacArthur, who was also next to the aircraft's door.
"Let's see whose butt end kicked, ma'am. LeShawna and I have lots of experience jumping off high places," said Tyler, putting out his chest.
"Hahaha, as if your experience can beat our training," MacArthur flexed, accidentally hitting Sanders in the head. "Tell them, Sanders."
"Ouch! Why are you provoking them like that?" said Sanders rubbing her head.
LeShawna chuckled. "Because she's scared, and provoking others makes her feel better."
"What? I'm scared?" MacArthur laughed loudly. "I don't know the meaning of that word. I thought scared was something cowards made up to justify themselves."
Tyler chuckled, and LeShawna rolled her eyes while MacArthur opened the aircraft door.
"See ya losers," said MacArthur jumping first.
"Not so fast!" shouted Tyler.
"No wait!"
However, LeShawna's shout came too late. The teams fell toward the stadium, but a wind current pushed the cadets and the TV Pros parachute away from the donut-like objective. LeShawna and Tyler fell on a fountain while Macarthur crushed Sanders against a wall.
Team confessional: Slow and steady win the race
"Why did you jump so early?" asked LeShawna in a neutral voice, her wet hair all over her face.
Tyler squished his headband. "Sorry, it's a race so I thought we needed to go quickly before the cadets got away."
"Sugar, next time we will jump when I tell you, ok?"
"But Lesh…"
"OK?" LeShawna repeated, obviously annoyed after falling in the fountain.
"Ok," said Tyler, rubbing his arm.
Team confessional: Stupid wind currents
"Why did you jump?" asked Sanders, who was covered in scratches and had a black eye.
"Because this is a race duh? So I try to put us ahead," said MacArthur, her hair disheveled and also covered in scratches.
Sanders raised an eyebrow. "But we had parachute training, you knew if we jumped too early we may be caught in an air current."
"Well… maybe, JUST maybe I got a bit passional about beating those TV losers," said the older cadet, avoiding Sanders's eyes.
"MacArthur," said Sanders in a disappointed tone.
"WHAT? I'm a competitive and strong person, you can't blame me for trying to beat my rivals," said MacArthur, crossing her arms.
The younger police cadet rolled her eyes. "Anyway, next time. I'll tell you when you have to jump."
"Ok, but we need to jump before the Tv Losers."
"MACARTHUR!"
"What? I told you I'm a competitive person," replied MacArthur. Shrugging while Sanders frowned at her.
The other 6 teams jumped off the plane, Tom screamed loudly in a high pitch voice, while the Ice Dancers were blown away by a wind current, crashing against a billboard.
The Larpers landed in the middle of the donut, with the Genius falling over them and the Fashion bloggers landing over the Genius, Tom still screaming.
"Tom, Tom, we're ok," said Jen in a loud voice.
The male fashion blogger got quiet and then chuckled nervously. "YOU'RE RIGHT! I was so scared, but it wasn't actually so bad."
"Yes, and we ended unhurt," said Jen, also chuckling.
"I would like to say the same sadly I can't," said Leonard in a pained voice.
Both Tom and Jen blushed, getting off the pile of contestants as soon as they could.
A few steps ahead, Kitty fell over Emma.
"Well, it wasn't that bad," said Kitty as her sister groaned.
But she talked too soon. Suddenly the Adversity twins fell over them.
"Ouch, hello guys, are you ok?" asked Kitty in a pained voice.
"Hehehe, ouch, yes, sorry about that," said Mickey, making a goofy smile.
"Less apologizing and more moving," shouted Emma, pushing the twins and her sister off her back. "And stop wasting time, Kitty."
The younger sister waved at the twins. "See you later."
Both twins waved back at her with sparkly eyes.
Team confessional: Girls
"My brother and I aren't used to girls talking to us," said Mickey, rubbing his arm.
"Unless it's to ask us 'are you alright?'" said Jay, raising a finger.
"Or 'can you hear me?'"
"Can you tell me your emergency number?"
"So I didn't expect Kitty would talk us," said Mickey, making a small smile. "Do you think we could propose the alliance to them?"
Jay shrugged. "I don't think her sister would accept, but we don't lose anything trying."
As some of the contestants advanced to the second challenge, the teams in the second plane arrived in China. Those 4 teams, along with the TV Pros, the police cadets, and the ice dancers, ran toward the aircraft again.
"Wow LeShawna, fancy meeting. Are you jumping too?" asked Brody, winking.
"Boy, what are you talking about? We're in the same show," said LeShawna, frowning. "And also, we failed the first attempt so we have to jump again."
MacArthur laughed loudly. "Yes, they just feel in a fountain. It was so lame."
"MacArthur!" screamed Brody, startled.
"Yes, that's my name, don't wear it out," said the police cadet chuckling.
Brody laughed nervously and began to run slower, joining Geoff.
"Phew, I think she didn't notice it," said Brody drying his forehead.
"Hahaha, I'm sure she didn't," said Geoff, who didn't have any idea what Brody was talking about.
At the same time, Taylor ran next to Tyler.
"Hello there, Tim, I'm sure you're surprised someone as habanero hot as me is talking to you," said the brat, but Tyler just ignored her, focusing on LeShawna and Brody.
Team confessional: How dare you.
"Did that idiot just ignore me?" asked Taylor, crossing her arms. "NOBODY IGNORES ME!"
Kelly chuckled, "Don't worry Taylor. I'm sure he didn't listen to you."
"Of course, he is probably hard of hearing or maybe an idiot. I just need to try again," Taylor made an arrogant smile. "I'm glad I thought about that."
"You're so smart Honey," said Kelly, shrugging.
The teams began to jump into the stadium, not all landing perfectly.
The Stepbrothers landed over Father and son, and the Surfer dudes over the stepbrothers.
Some meters afar from them, the Ice dancers also had a less-than-ideal landing.
"Ouch!" shouted Jacques. "I twisted my ankle."
Joseé rolled her eyes. "Oh, stop being a baby. This is a competition so EAT THE PAIN and smile."
Jaques nodded and began to limp behind her.
Mother and daughter couldn't land on their feet, falling to the ground.
"MOM! Be careful!"
"But honey, you're the one who fell over me," said Kelly, frowning at her daughter.
Taylor stood up and rolled her eyes. "Ugh, anyone can have an accident, you know."
Kelly sighed and followed her daughter.
Tyler and LeShawna landed on their feet and stopped after some steps. The Police cadets could be seen having a perfect landing in the background.
"WOW, wick landing," said Tyler, taking off the harness.
"Yes, we nailed it," said LeShawna giving her teammate a high five. "it seems we still can do it if we put our mind to it."
Tyler flexed. "Of course, we're an extreme team."
"You say it, Sugar." LeShawna pressed the Don box and read the travel tip. "All-in You're skewer: Go to the street food stand. One team member must assemble and deep fry a skewer of food, and their partner eat it. Once done, the vendor will give you the next travel tip."
"This will be easy, you cook, and I eat," said Tyler, winking.
"Hahaha, someone is hungry here, eh?" LeShawna teased him, winking.
The jock blushed. "Oh, it's not like that. It's only because I think I'm better at eating than cooking."
"Ok, I'll cook," said LeShawna, shrugging.
"Then I'll eat too!" said Brody, he and Geoff joining the TV Pros. "Just wait and see LeShawna. I can eat anything as long it's fried."
"Wow bro, that's sick!" said Tyler, fist-bumping the surfer dude
But after the short run to the marketplace, he regretted his decision.
The skewer must be done with non-conventional Chinese ingredients, like spiders, bats, scorpions, crickets, silkworms, and their cocoons.
Brody raised an eyebrow and asked the shopkeeper, an old Chinese lady. "Are the crickets fresh?"
The old lady showed him a small cricket that winked at him.
"Ugh, how can anyone eat SPIDERS!" said LeShawna shuddering. "Ty, are you sure you want to do it? I mean, I feel bad for forcing you."
"Don't worry Lesh I even eat what Linds used to make for me," said Tyler making a sad smile.
LeShawna raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure it's fine you say that on international tv? Lindsay will watch it."
"Oh," Tyler's eyes widened, and then he blushed. "Linds, don't feel bad. I was exaggerating! That raw and burnt steak wasn't that bad, and I loved that … weird thing you served as a side."
LeShawna went to get some ingredients while Tyler waited for her. He probably fixed his comment, right?.
"Hello Tim, you must be pretty brave to let that cow cook for you."
Tyler listened to Taylor's voice and turned around, but after taking a look, she ignored her again.
"HEY! I'm talking to you, dork. At least you can return my greeting," said Taylor pushing him.
"Eh?" Tyler looked at her with wide eyes. "Are you talking to me? But my name isn't Tim. It's Tyler."
Taylor made an effort to not roll her eyes. "Uh, well, whatever. They sound similar, no?" Tyler shook his head, which made her groan. "Look, Tyson…"
"Tyler."
"Grrr, anyway, I wanted to talk with you because I like wanted to meet you," said Taylor making a huge smile. "I mean, you're so good at the challenges and so handsome."
"am I?"
"Yes, but my lame Mom was always against it," said Taylor putting her hand on her forehead. "Because she's very controlling or whatever."
Kelly was looking inside a box and then ran away screaming, small spiders climbing out of the box.
"Your Mom doesn't seem very controlling," said the jock scratching his head.
"Can you stop mumbling and listen to me?" Taylor put her hands on her hips, "I mean, I think someone like you may be happy to help a hot girl like me."
"But we're in different teams," said Tyler, walking backward.
Taylor shrugged. "I don't mind. I'll let you help me. Bye, bye."
Tyler stood there, not knowing what to say.
Solo confessional: The right bait
"Ugh, I hate talking with dorks," said Taylor filing her nails. "But now that Tyler fell in love with me, I can start planning my revenge against that cow. Just wait, I'll teach her nobody steals what is mine."
Solo confessional: Eh?
"That girl is weird. She knows this is a competition, right?" asked the jock, scratching his head.
Meanwhile, Kelly was cowering, trying to skewer a scorpion.
"Having problems with the food, ma'am?" asked Dwayne, smiling.
"These scorpions are hard to get," said Kelly trying to skewer one and failing.
Dwayne laughed. "It would be easier if you take them with your hands."
The father tried to put his hand in the box, but the old shopkeeper slapped him.
"I think the owner's right. It's dangerous to get them barehanded," said Kelly, her hands trembling.
"Don't worry about me. I have panther-like reflexes, I'll be…" Dwayne put the hand inside the box and suddenly pulled it out, covered in scorpions. "OUCH!"
Dwayne began to wave his hand, sending scorpions everywhere. One of them landed on Jaques' face.
"Ahhh! Kill it Joseé!" shouted Jaques.
Kelly and Junior winced as Joseé hit Jacques's face, trying to kill the scorpion, while Dwayne's hand was bloated.
"Hehehe, I think this isn't worked as your Dad wanted," said Kelly chuckling nervously, as Junior slapped his face.
As this happened, LeShawna was skewing some ingredients.
"Uh-uh, no. There is no way I'm using spiders or scorpions in my food," said LeShawna shuddering. "And no snakes either."
"GET AWAY FROM ME."
"AND FROM MY HAIR!"
LeShawna saw the two Fashion bloggers running away from a swarm of bats.
"And no flying rats either," said the sister, looking at them with wide eyes.
She then saw the Adversity twins struggling to skewer some scorpions. The twins were screaming, and their skewer was split in half.
LeShawna hesitated, but Tyler was right, there was something in those two that made her want to help them. "Boys, what are you doing?"
"W-we are trying to skewer some animals to fry," said Jay, rubbing his hands anxiously.
"But it seems the animals don't want to help," said Mickey, showing the broken skewer.
The sista laughed. "You just need to use less scary ingredients. Like this silkworm larvae." She then pierced one of the light brown worms.
"The problem is Jay's silkworm allergy," said Mickey, not looking at LeShawna's eyes.
"You say what?" asked the sista with a 'tude.
Jay made a sad smile. "Mickey and I have more than 70 different allergies, including confetti, orchids, dust mites, lactose intolerance, bees, canola oil, and kanekalon, among others."
"Kanela-what?"
"It's a synthetic fiber used to make artificial hair, used in wigs and toupes," said Mickey, his voice trembling. "We find out after a weird accident during chemistry class…"
LeShawna raised a hand. "Stop! I think I don't want to find out." She then turned around. "We can't use silkworms, so let's use another animal. Are you allergic to crickets?"
"I don't know, are we?" asked Mickey, tilting his head.
Jay took out a thick book from his pocket. "I don't think so, but let me double-check our allergies list."
"Well, meanwhile I'll be skewering these little friends," said LeShawna, opening a box.
However, instead of crickets, she found a large snake that jumped out of the box and bit her face.
Jay gasped as Mickey ran toward the sista. "Are you ok?"
"I am," said LeShawna in a muffled voice. She then rolled up her sleeves. "But we can't say the same of this friend."
Team confessional: Allies
"I think the Real Reality TV Pros would make better allies than the sisters," said Jay, rubbing his chin.
"W-Why do you say that?" asked Mickey, his voice trembling.
Jay enumerated their reasons. "They have already helped us a couple of times, are a pretty strong team, and don't seem to be bothered with our issues."
"I understand those reasons. However, Kitty is pretty nice."
"Yes, but Emma hates our guts," said Jay. Both twins groaned.
Mickey sighed. "You're right, let's try the TV Pros."
Jay patted his brother's shoulder. "But if we can't ally with them, we can try the sisters."
"I like that idea!" said Mickey making a small smile.
LeShawna left the twins after splitting the ingredients and started frying her skewer. Tyler arrived with a nervous smile. The Ice dancers and the Genius were already finishing. Joseé forced Jacques to eat the skewer while Mary prepared her skewer in thin slices, so when Ellody ate it, the oil covered the food flavor.
"Mmm, that looks good," said Tyler, looking at the fried food skewered, which looked like weirdly shaped croquettes.
"Don't think too much about it, and just eat them," said LeShawna, nervously. "Be careful, it's hot."
Tyler took the skewer and began to devour the food pretty quickly. "Hey this is tasty, but it has a weird consistency. Is it salmon?"
"Believe me Ty, you don't want to know," said LeShawna, trying not to retch after seeing Tyler eating the snake and the larvae.
"Finish!" shouted Tyler, licking his fingers. "Dude, this wasn't that bad. Can you make another one?"
"Tyler focus. We're falling behind," said LeShawna, looking at the sisters, the Police cadets, Fashion bloggers, and the Surfer dudes who were already getting their tips.
Tyler groaned. "Darn it, I really wanted seconds."
The old lady gave LeShawna the travel tip.
"Botch or Watch: Human Taxi Driver," read LeShawna, rolling her eyes. "Whoever didn't dive in Hawaii must pull their teammate by rickshaw all the way to the Great Wall of China. Using only the map found on the rickshaw, find the chill zone hidden somewhere along the wall, and check-in." The sista groaned. "Why do I get all the physically demanding botches?"
"Hahaha, don't worry LeShawna, just show your might!" said Tyler, fist-pumping.
LeShawna gave a dirty look to her companion as he sat in the rickshaw, and she began to pull it.
They quickly caught up with the Geniuses, who were falling behind.
"Mary, we have just fallen to 6th place," said Ellody, adjusting her glasses.
"Apologies, my endurance, brawniness, and overall physical aptitude it's below average for an adult of my weight and height," said Mary, huffing and puffing, her hair disheveled.
As the first teams began to rush to the Great Wall, the remaining 5 teams were struggling to finish the challenge.
"We aren't allergic to snake meat, right?" asked Mickey, taking the skewer out of the oil.
"I guess we'll find out," said Jay, gulping before eating the skewer.
The stepbrothers gave the twins a dirty look.
"I can't believe we're falling behind," said Lorenzo, holding his skewer.
"I can't believe you can't eat the skewer," replied Chet, crossing his arms.
Lorenzo rolled his eyes. "There is no way I can eat something you cook. It will probably taste awful."
"Ha, I see your mouth moving, but I only hear buk,buk,buk like the chicken you're," said Chet, imitating a chicken.
"Oh yeah," Lorenzo ate the skewer in a single bite. "Who is the chicken… burp," however, the Latin stepbrother began to become green-colored and then barfed over Chet.
At the same time, Dwayne and Junior were working together. Dwayne's pupils were dilated, and his hand orange colored and bloated.
"Are you ok dad?" asked Junior, raising his eyebrows.
"Arr captain, this matey is better than ok," said Dawyne, falling to the ground.
"I think he isn't fine," said Kelly shaking her head. "Don't worry, I'll prepare your skewer too."
Junior raised an eyebrow. "Eh? Why?"
"Because your dad got hurt trying to help me, and I like to pay my debts," said Kelly smiling.
"Sorry ma'am, this is my challenge, so I will do it," said Junior in a stern tone. "Buuut I won't stop if you want to lend me a hand frying the skewer."
Kelly covered her mouth. "Hehehe, let's do like you said."
Meanwhile, Leonard prepared some ingredients, with his face covered in small blisters.
"I can't believe spiders can jump," said Leonard, giving the skewer to Tammy. "I wonder if driders can jump too."
"Surely they can, those evil Loth worshipers," said Tammy, who devoured her skewer in a moment. "It needed a bit of salt, but it's not bad."
Leonard looked at her with wide eyes. "Wow, I can't believe you just devoured that spider without hesitation.
"Spider?" replied Tammy, her skin turning green and then barfing in a bucket.
"Oh, sorry," said Leonard, covering his mouth nervously.
After passing the Genius, Tyler and LeShawna were getting closer to the Chinese wall when they found the sisters on the side of the road. Their rickshaw was without a wheel. Emma kicked it, trying to fix it, while Kitty held the cart.
"It's better if you use a stone to hammer it instead of kicks," shouted Tyler with a big grin.
"NOBODY ASKED YOU!" shouted Emma, waving her fist. "But he is probably right."
"See, I told you the TV pros aren't that bad," said Kitty smiling.
Emma glared at her. "He probably did it to mock us or to gloat they were winning."
"Really? They helped us to gloat about it?"
"Less whining and more searching, that rock will not find itself," said Emma, while Kitty sighed.
Further ahead in the Chinese wall, the Ice dancers were the first to arrive.
"This map is useless!" shouted Jacques, annoyed. "which way is the chill zone?"
"I know how we can find out." Joseé took the map, rubbed rock-rock against it, and threw it upwards.
The wind blew away the map toward the left.
"See, fate is telling us it's that way!" shouted Joseé. "The gold is ours."
The ice dancers ran away as the Police cadets and the Surfer dudes arrived.
"Which way?" asked Sanders, looking right and left.
"Should we split up?" asked Geoff
Brody walked forward and put an arm over the chubby cadet's shoulders. "Good Idea, I go with MacArthur."
"Dude, I mean one team goes right, and the other team goes left," said Geoff, chuckling.
However, they went all together behind the Ice dancers.
Team confessional: Crushes
"It's not Brody or Tyler's fault they are crushing for me. My doctor says my pheromones are as strong as a jet engine built by grizzly bears," said MacArthur, kissing her bicep.
"What?" Sanders squinted her eyes at her teammate. "That doesn't make any sense."
MacArthur laughed at her. "Yeah, alright. Because you're a bear expert."
Sanders just rolled her eyes.
The Real Reality Tv Pros arrived at the Great Wall together with the fashion bloggers. LeShawna and Jen were checking on the maps while Tyler looked at Tom. The atmosphere was a bit awkward as none of them had interacted before. Although Tyler is the type of guy who can't bear that kind of atmosphere.
"Nice hat," said Tyler, talking a bit faster than usual.
"Oh thanks! It's called a fez, pretty neat eh?" said Tom proudly.
Tyler nodded. "Well, yes, it's red, and I like red."
"Red compliments blue pretty well. That's why I chose it," said Tom, adjusting his hat.
"I think it looks pretty swell," said Tyler, nodding. "But I don't think wearing it while doing sports is a good idea."
Tom shook his head. "Hahaha, I think you shouldn't. I mean, it's easy to drop it or get it damaged."
"Then why do you use it in the competition?"
The fashion blogger opened his mouth and then closed it, "that's actually a pretty good question."
As Tom was thinking about what Tyler had told him, LeShawna finished reading the map.
"We can't keep wasting time, Tyler. Let's go," said LeShawna, pulling the jock to the left side.
"See ya," said Tyler, waving at Tom.
"Bye," replied the fashion bloggers.
Jen walked toward Tom, looking at the map. "I don't know for sure, but I guess it's on the right side."
"Then let's go right," said Tom, winking.
"But I may be wrong," Jen frowned.
Tom chuckled. "Dear, you have pretty good instincts, so let's go right. I'm sure we'll find the chill zone."
The Fashion bloggers began to run in that direction, Tyler looking at them through the corner of their eye.
"Hey Lesh! Are you sure this is the correct path?" the jock scratched his head. "Those two blue dudes are going the other way."
"No, I'm not sure," said LeShawna, rolling her eyes. "But they're probably as lost as us."
Tyler pouted. "Are you sure? Because we're lost, but they may know the right direction."
"But they may be lost."
"Either way is 50/50 for us," Tyler smirked. "Lesh, is the last inning with two outs. I prefer to take the risk of hitting big than losing trapped in first base."
"Ok, in simpler words, you say we should follow them," said LeShawna, shrugging. "But if you're wrong, you will invite me to dinner."
Tyler winked. "We have a deal."
LeShawna and Tyler then began to follow the Fashion bloggers toward the right side.
Back to the cooking challenge, the Larpers and the Adversity twins had already finished their skewer while Lorenzo struggled to finish his. Kelly was frying both hers and Junior's skewer.
"Thanks, Mrs," said Junior taking the weird-shaped skewer.
"You took your sweet time," said Taylor rolling her eyes, while Kelly held her skewer in front of her. "What? I'm not eating that."
Kelly frowned. "Honey, I cooked it, and the rules are that one cooks and the other eats. If not, we will be penalized."
While they discussed, Junior gave the skewer to Dwayne. "Take this dad, Mrs. Kelly made it."
"Thanks Mrs. President, I'll enjoy it," saying this, Dwayne began to eat it, he still was acting weird, but he seemed to didn't mind the food.
"See Taylor, even Mr. Dayne is eating it," said her mother, smiling.
Taylor scoffed. "I don't care. Eat it yourself."
"Mrs. Kelly, stop. There is no way Taylor can eat that," said Junior in a condescending tone. "A pampered girl that never won anything can't do even the simpler things like this."
"HEY twerp! What do you know? I'm like a bazillion times better…"
"Prove it," said Junior, smirking.
"I don't have…"
"So you can't do it, not a surprise. Maybe your Mom can hire a person to eat it and buy you a trophy for it," Junior walked away, pulling his dad. "We already finished, so see you later."
Taylor's face was red, and her lip was trembling. She took the skewer off her mother's hands and ate it in a single bite. "I'll crush…" however the brat felt a weird texture in her throat and had to turn around and barf in a bucket. "MOM! There were WORMS in my food! WORMS!"
"Hehehe, I don't know how they ended there," said Kelly, laughing nervously.
"And at last, our first team has arrived at the chill zone, and … it's not someone I expected," said Don smiling at the camera. "Congratulations Fashion Bloggers you're in first place!"
Jen and Tom looked at each other and hugged. "YAY!"
"And Real Reality TV Pros, you're second," said Don as LeShawna and Tyler stepped onto the carpet.
"Wow sugar, you were damn right," said LeShawna giving Tyler a high five.
Tyler high-fived and blushed. "I was just lucky."
"If it's luck, I hope you have enough for the rest of the race," said Don winking. "Now please go into the chill zone."
The TV Pros walked past Don. The race for first place ended, while the race for not last started.
Meanwhile The Ice Dancers were running in the opposite direction, smiling as always. After a moment, Jacques raised an eyebrow.
"Hey Joseé, I think we chose the wrong way," said the blond guy.
"Of course not!" replied Joseé, glaring.
Jacques then stopped. "But there is nothing here, and we haven't seen any other team."
"What are you saying? The mall cops and the surfer dumbs are behind us," said Joseé pointing at the other teams.
And just then, both teams turned around and began to run in the opposite direction.
"NO WAY!" shouted Joseé, clenching her fist.
"Let's go back, quickly," said Jaques. Both Ice dancers then began to run as fast as possible.
And as these three teams were trying to come back, the sisters and the Genius arrived at the Great Wall.
"Ok this map doesn't make any sense," said Emma, groaning.
"Maybe it's like in those movies, and there is a secret," Kitty took the map and put it toward the sun. "Or maybe it's just a plain weird map."
As the sisters discussed, the Genius walked next to them.
"I-I *buff* overworked myself," said Mary, huffing while standing next to Ellody.
"Don't distress, we just need to use this chart and we will be dozing in the chill zone in no time," said the Indian Genius.
The sisters just saw them in silence as they went to the right.
"Do you think they can actually read the map?" asked Kitty, raising an eyebrow.
"There is only one way to find out. Let's follow them," said Emma, pulling her sister.
Back to the rickshaws, Kelly was pulling the cart.
"C'mon mamacita, hurry up! They're getting away," said Taylor, rolling her eyes.
"I'm doing… what I can,…huff… this will be so good… for my cardio," said Kelly between breaths, trying to win some distance against the other teams.
A short distance from them, Junior was riding the cart while Dwayne pulled it.
"Hahaha, Mr. Santa, Am I doing a fine job pulling the sled?" asked Dwayne, his eyes unfocused.
"Yes, I mean Ohoho, yes," replied Junior in a nervous tone, he then muttered. "I hope this is only temporal."
They started running with the Stepbrothers, but Lorenzo pulled the cart faster than Dwayne and soon they left them behind.
Of course, the stepbrothers were doing a fine job but fighting as usual.
"Can't you go faster? You're as slow as a donkey," said Chet, smirking.,
"Yeah, at least I don't smell like one," said Lorenzo chuckling.
Chet glared at him. "No, but you're as ugly as one."
They then passed the Larpers. Leonard struggling to keep up the pace.
"Hahaha, eat that, cosplayers!" shouted Chet, smirking.
"You shall not pass," shouted Lorenzo, laughing.
"Good burn," said Chet smiling excitedly, but soon his smile turned into a frown. "But you're still an idiot."
"Oh yeah, had you looked into a mirror?" asked Lorenzo, also frowning.
Meanwhile, Tammy looked at them.
"First, the doppelgangers, and now the barbarians. Leo, are you ok?" asked Tammy, biting her lip.
"Yes, but my archmage robe isn't good for running, I keep stepping on it," said Leonard as he tried to run.
Tammy's eyes widened. "Then why you don't use the skill we invented in Romania?"
"Oh you're right!" Leonard rolled up his robe, showing his legs and running faster. "Tammy, you're a genius."
"Hehehe, thanks. Now let me play the song of celerity so your feet move faster." The Valkyrie then began to play her ocarina, the song sounding awkward thanks to Leonard passing over many rocks.
Don was smiling as more contestants began to arrive at the carpet of completion.
"Genius, you're 3rd, and sisters, 4th," said Don, making finger guns.
"Fourth?" Emma smiled. "That's pretty good."
Kitty raised her hands. "Yes, we did it!"
"Actually I did it. You need to improve your game," said Emma, glaring at her sister.
"Are you serious?" whined Kitty while following her sister.
"Siblings," Don shrugged and chuckled as more teams stepped on the carpet. "Police cadets, you're fifth, Surfer dudes sixth, and Ice dancers seven. Ouch! That's harsh."
"Seventh, SEVENTH!" shouted Joseé, her eye twitching.
Don raised both hands. "It's not that bad, well it's not good either. You're basically in the middle of the table."
Joseé screamed and stomped out of the place followed by a worried Jacques.
"I think I should stop taunting them," said Don, pulling the collar of his shirt. "And we have the adversity teams here, in 8th, and the Stepbrothers in 9th."
"Yeah!" said both brothers, high-fiving and then frowning.
"Don't be so happy because I carried you," said Chet crossing his arms.
"Carried me? I literally pulled the rickshaw," said Lorenzo, jabbing his finger against Chet's chest.
Don ignored them and continued narrating. "And the last 3 teams are running toward the goal. Who will be last?"
As Don talked, the teams struggled to arrive at the carpet of completion.
"Layer upon layer, make your mark now... Haste!"
"Yes, lil leprechaun, I see your pot of gold."
"C'mon Mom, stop slowing me down!"
"And congratulations father and son, you're in 10th, Mother and daughter, I'm shocked you finished in 11th," said the host smiling.
Leonard and Tammy arrived dragging their feet, groaning.
"Larpers, I'm sorry to tell you are in last place," said Don, shaking his head.
"NO! If only we were a bit faster," said Leonard falling on his knees.
Tammy kneeled at his side and patted his back. "Don't worry Leo, we did our best. We can be proud."
"NO!" Leonard stood up, raising his staff. "I don't accept it. It's time to use the time reversal spell!"
Leonard shouted in a loud voice, but nothing happened. After some seconds of awkward silence, Tammy played the ocarina.
"I really regret saying this, but Larpers, this is a non-elimination round, so you're safe," Don sighed, rubbing his temple.
"TAMMY! My spell worked!"
"No it didn't work," said Don, glaring at them.
"YES LEO! You're amazing."
"I really want this team to get out of the game," said Don sighing while entering the chill zone.
That day LeShawna and Tyler were alone. Geoff and Brody had plans, so they thought about eating alone when someone called them.
"TV Pros, do you have a moment?"
LeShawna and Tyler turned around and met the adversity twins, looking awkwardly at them.
"We wanted to know if you want to eat together?" asked Mickey, rubbing his neck.
The former total drama contestants looked at each other and shrugged.
"Ok boys, let's do it," said LeShawna, shrugging.
The twins celebrated, and the four were to a Chinese restaurant, ordering a light dinner because Tyler and Mickey weren't too hungry after the challenge. The dinner was fine, they talked about the show, and Tyler and the twins bonded over being accident-prone. After a nice time, they went to their rooms.
"Those twins aren't so bad," said Tyler, entering the room.
"No they don't," replied LeShawna, "but it was weird they suddenly invited us to dinner."
Tyler raised an eyebrow, "it was?
"We didn't interact that much before, so why would they want to dine with us?" asked the sista with a 'tude.
"Maybe they want to know us better," replied Tyler, shrugging. "But they're fun, and we didn't lose anything, so I don't see the problem."
Leshawna nodded. "You're right boy, maybe I'm overthinking."
The TV pros went to sleep as the adversity twins went back to their rooms. There was no way LeShawna and Tyler could know the twins' true intentions.
"We should have told them about the alliance," said Jay in a worried tone.
"And if we failed," asked Mickey, sighing sadly. "We don't have many chances."
Jay sighed sadly. "You're right. Let's try to befriend them before trying to make the alliance."
The twins went to sleep, hoping they could survive in the game at least until they could make the alliance with the TV Pros… or with any other team, they could convince to help them.
And China ended with the Larpers last, but it seems magic exists because they're still in the race.
The episode started to show more interactions between the competitors, with LeShawna and Tyler in the middle. They right now are in the zone, showing the name TV pros isn't a joke. Let's see how long they can keep that pace.
And as always if you feel like it please leave a review/comment with your thoughts about the chapter, I promise to answer them in the next chapter. Your thoughts help me a lot not only to improve the story but also to keep my motivation (and, if necessary, improve the chapters.)
Now let me answer the latest reviews:
More than a review, I want to thank DavyDoo, SAMOTA, and Frogberth the ninth for your comment about the last chapter elimination. I already added a small scene showing who was eliminated from the competition. In future chapters, all the eliminations will be clearer.
bobomb33rd: Yes, the best friends at least weren't sabotaged by those evil TV Pros. But I wanted to give some hope for their future together in the elimination, and I hope I succeed.
Also, Mother and daughter now need to show what they are capable of, can Kelly carry her daughter, or will Taylor start pulling her weight? I guess we will find out.
And I'm pretty hyped and happy because you noticed the reference to 'how was my first time,' I must say Geoff's story was my favorite in that compilation, I hope you also enjoyed that story.