Chapter 8: Closure

"Wait, wait, wait. You, kissed him? Clare, what were you thinking?" Alli exclaimed as she and Clare sat on the front steps of Degrassi.

"Allie, pronouns! He kissed me. There's an exponential difference," Clare reassured, trying to make the situation sound less dire. "Please, don't make me feel worse then I already do," she pleaded.

Alli tried to quiet herself by drinking her coffee, but couldn't resist. "Did you tell Eli?" she asked.

"Oh, yes Alli. I told him that I cheated on him with my ex-boyfriend seconds after we declared our love for each other. That would have blown over well," Clare answered sarcastically. She threw away her coffee, the smell making her sick to her stomach.

"Oh, right," Alli said, looking down at the ground. In a matter of seconds, her eyes widened, as if having an epiphany. "Wait, declared your what? He said he loves you?" she asked, clapping her hands in excitement. Clare grabbed Alli's hands to stop the celebration.

"Yeah, but I can't exactly enjoy it now that KC and I kissed. Everything's ruined," Clare complained, resting her head in her hands. Clare's eyes began to tear up. "How can things go back to the way they were before? Before I messed up?" she choked, trying to prevent a flood of tears.

Alli put her arm around Clare, squeezing tight. "Everything will be alright, Clare. Eli loves you, and you love Eli. That's the way it's supposed to be. You just made a minor emotional detour," she assured. Alli's heart sank knowing that Clare was going through so much crap. Clare didn't deserve this. She was such a good person.

"I hope you're right, Alli," Clare sniffed, stuggling to breathe evenly.

"I'm always right," Alli teased, trying to pry a smile out of Clare.

Clare wiped her eyes and stood up, straightening her shirt. "Well, for the sake of my relationship, I have to tell Eli. Everything," Clare declared, not quite sure how she was going to execute this plan.

"What? Now? Are you sure? Maybe you should think this out," Alli said, grabbing Clare's arm before she made a huge mistake.

"Alli, I can't start this relationship off with lies. I'm not that kind of person. If I don't tell him now, it's just going to eat away at me. The longer I wait, the more it's going to hurt Eli. And I can't do that," Clare said, pulling away from Alli. She hung her bag over her shoulder. "Whatever it takes."

Clare walked up the stairs in pursuit of Eli. She hadn't seen him since the movie night. Although they had made plans to have breakfast the next day, Clare canceled, scared to even look at Eli after what she had done.

Upon entering the school, she scanned the halls, unable to locate Eli in the large throngs of students. She walked towards his locker, sweat beads forming on her forehead, dreading what she as going to say to Eli. What if he breaks up with me, Clare panicked, heart racing. Her legs felt stiff, as if they were telling her to stop. But she couldn't. I have to tell the truth, she thought.

As she was fighting her way through the crowded halls, the last person she ever wanted to see came up to her.

"Clare," KC summoned, grabbing her arm. "I have to talk to you." He looked desperate.

"KC, we've done enough talking," she said angrily, pulling her arm from his grasp. "Leave me alone," she yelled, stalking off.

KC was too stubborn to listen to her. He ran in front of her, stopping her in her path. "I can't do that, Clare." He grabbed her by the arm and led her into an empty classroom, in spite of her objections. Once in the room, KC blocked the door with his body, allowing no way for Clare to escape. "I didn't want to do this Clare, but I feel like this is the only way you're going to hear me out. Please, don't fight me," KC begged, firmly grasping Clare's shoulders.

Clare gave it all she had, struggling to escape his grasp, but she couldn't. "Why can't you leave me alone, KC?"

"Because!" he yelled, his voice breaking. He took a deep breath to keep from losing his temper. "Because, I love you," he said softly. "Why can't you see that we belong together? You and me. Not you and that goth guy."

"He has a name," Clare said through gritted teeth.

"Whatever," KC said. "Clare, it's you, it's always been you!" he declared over her objections.

"I don't believe that, KC! I don't believe that you love me. You can't love me, and do what you did to me," Clare said, tears forming in her eyes. "People just don't do that to the people that they love." This time she didn't try to keep the tears from falling.

"But I've changed," KC objected. "I'm a different person," he whispered, barely able to talk.

"That's what they all say," Clare answered, looking at him with cold eyes. KC had never seen this side of Clare. It broke his heart that he caused her to hate him so much.

"That's what my mother said. And I believed her. I gave her my trust, after all the crap she had put me through. I gave her a second chance. If I can give my mother a second chance, you can give me one," KC lectured, finally letting go of Clare.

Clare didn't know how to respond to what KC just said. He's right, she thought. God teaches us to forgive those who've wronged us. Why shouldn't I?

"I told myself, over and over again, that I had forgiven you. But I was lying to myself. I hadn't. We never had closure. You had abandoned me, and it hurt, KC. It really hurt. But now, I forgive you. I've let go, because I realized that we can never go back to the way we were. This is out closure," Clare cried, shoulders heaving. After a few seconds, upon grasping composure, Clare had one final question for KC. "What are you running from?" she asked, barely whispering.

This was the question that caused KC to completely lose himself. All the barriers were down, and he couldn't hide from Clare. This was the moment of truth. Before he could answer, KC began to cry, his face convoluted. He ran his hands through his hair trying to calm himself down before he answered her, looking at his feet. Clare waited with patience, knowing this was hard for him.

"Jenna's pregnant." He looked up at Clare in desperation, praying that she wouldn't turn her back on him.

Clare stood there, unable to move. Her entire world was still, trying to grasp the information that just left KC's mouth. Jenna was pregnant with his child? All of a sudden, everything made sense. The break up, his odd behavior, his sudden need for Clare. He needed her love to comfort him.

"Oh, KC," Clare said, not knowing what to do. She then walked up to him and embraced him with as much strength as she could, not daring to let go. She didn't know how long they were standing in that classroom, but she just let him cry on her shoulder, letting his pain out. Clare stroked KC's head, attempting to calm him down, whispering words of consolation in his ear.

KC finally stopped crying and Clare wiped his tears away. She gave him a tissue to blow his nose, and waited for him to speak. They were seated on the floor, his head on her shoulders.

"I don't know what to do, Clare," he whispered. He sounded so helpless, it shattered Clare's heart.

"I think you do," Clare answered, looking him straight in the eyes. He looked at her in confusion, but after a few seconds, he understood what she meant. "You can't leave Jenna alone. She needs you. She's your responsibility now, KC."

KC just sat there, taking in Clare's advice, knowing in all honesty that she was right. He slowly nodded his head in agreement, too weak to say much.

"I understand," he answered. "You're right. I know that's the right thing to do. I just…freaked. My world is so delicate right now, and a baby would just mess it up."

"Maybe not. This is how God wanted it to be, KC. Jenna wasn't the only one who messed up here. You both made that baby, so you both have to take care of it. "

KC took a deep, shaky breath. "Thanks, Clare. I don't know what I'd do without you," KC said, a miniscule smile on his tear stricken face.

This was the closure that Clare needed. She had finally let KC go. For a long time, she had been locked up in a cage of denial, telling herself that she had let go of KC. In consoling him and telling him that he had an obligation to Jenna, Clare had found the key. She was free. Free to be with Eli without any barriers.

"No problem," Clare smiled, helping KC up.

With one last hug, the two exited the classroom, ready to go their separate ways. KC walked off, feeling worlds better, ready to do what he had to do, which was take care of Jenna and his future child, although he still needed time to cope. HE would go to her, but not right now. He still needed more time, but Jenna would not go through this alone.

Clare, now alone, felt a bit shaken from what had just happened, but also felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of her shoulders. She knew whom she belonged with. It was Eli. Now, she had to tell him the truth. She had to tell him everything that had happened these past few days, for the sake of their relationship. A relationship was built off of trust, and Clare wanted hers to be strong. It may sting to tell him, but in the long run, it would be worth it.

She finally spotted Eli, who upon seeing her waved. He began walking towards her, a huge smile on his face. He looked so perfect with his black blazer and grey jeans. Clare took a deep breath. The moment of truth was upon them.

Soooo, how do you guys like it? Am I keeping you on your toes? Comment, please =)