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Devil's Trill
I: The Problem of Evil
CH6
One-Night Stand
At proper time, everyone scattered.
Light went home.
Ryuzaki sucked, so there.
He hadn't even dared to show his face after Light left him on the floor to bleed do death from a fatal pen-stabbing incident.
Fuck Ryuzaki, the last thing Light needed was a creepy male girlfriend-wannabe stalking him.
Speaking of which, Light better call Misa since it was his turn to call anyway. And Takada, definitely Takada. Last thing he needed was two blood-thirsty murderers after him instead of just one.
Deciding to deal with the greater of two evils first, Light dialed the one that got released on bail two days ago.
"Hello, Kyomi-"
Yeah, that one.
"Raito? Oh Raito I didn't do it I swear to you, I didn't do it!"
Right, so pretending Light had no idea Takada killed her own girlfriend less than a week ago wasn't an option than – she probably assumed the police would have told him. Takada was a great deal smarter than Misa, or anyone else he'd ever dated for that matter.
She was still just a woman though. Easy.
"Kyomi, calm down, it's alright, stop- are you crying? Don't cry, I'm sure it'll all get sorted out-"
"No it won't! It won't, you don't understand, it's all over, they think I did it but I didn't and they found me... oh, they found me with her blood all over me, Raito, please understand I didn't kill her!"
"Kyomi," Light said in a soothing tone using the first-name technique he developed on Misa to get attention of any hysterical woman, "the police are competent, I'm sure with a good lawyer you can prove you had nothing to do with-"
"No! No, no, no! You don't understand! They have proof and evidence and and... and no lawyer would take it! But I didn't do it I promise!"
By this point, Light's suspicions that Takada did in fact kill her girlfriend were cemented down. She was obviously in denial, unable to accept her own guilt despite having committed the crime.
He studied this kind of behavior in psychology and ironically, she studied this kind of behavior in psychology as well, the difference was that Takada was such an emotional wreck that she simply could not apply it to herself.
Simply put, it meant that Takada's mind was dead set on the fact that she did not kill anyone, despite knowing for a fact that she did.
Poor girl, so unstable. Partially the reason Light dumped her, partially the reason the instability only worsened.
Might as well comfort her so that she doesn't go after him next.
"Kyomi! Don't be ridiculous! Calm yourself please, you're just in shock, it's all going to be fine! There are hundreds of lawyers, you just have to find the right one, they'll clear you up, I'm sure the police just screwed up-"
"Oh Raito!" Takada sobbed, "you believe me don't you? I didn't do it, please tell me you're on my side and you believe me! I didn't do it Raito, please believe me!"
Oh well, better safe than sorry.
"...Of course I believe you Kyomi, you didn't kill anyone; I know it."
...later on, after he made a Misa-Misa call, Light was trialed and convicted of being a jealous douchebag, again.
Somewhere far away, Ryuga Hideki put down the Pink!GOstar Magazine.
"Um, I did what now?"
"Had a steaming hot date with Misa Amane," offered his manager.
When the moviestar made no effort to deny or recall the event, the manager/self-titled babysitter let out a heavy, hopeless sigh.
"Really Ryuga, we have to get that drinking problem under control."
Light woke up on Friday in an oddly cheery mood. He managed to sleep though the night without any incidents of rude awakenings; Light got his beauty sleep, finally.
Ryuzaki was probably still pissed at him and that brought him a warm feeling just as wonderful as the bright rays of January morning sun.
This was a start of a grand day, he thought to himself in the bathroom while styling his hair.
Eighteen strokes on the left side and twenty-seven on the right with a paddle brush since the right side was always harder to manage then the left. Then carefully do the back with a sculpting brush for more volume.
There, perfect.
Hmm. The right eyebrow is a little messy, he thought and reached for tweezers to pluck away the one offending eyebrow hair.
Well, hello there, gorgeous! Let's find you some socks, shall we!
His sock drawer was worthy of heaven, Light always liked to praise himself for that. The socks that made it to The Drawer had to be clean, at most a month old from the day of purchase and neatly folded and sorted by color in rows of fifteen and down ten in columns in descending shades.
In other words, The Drawer was Per-fect with a capital 'P'.
Hmm, I rather feel like a creamy shade of cerulean today, Light pulled out an odd shade of blue socks out, it goes just dandy with my hair.
And then there was Light's amazing Dress-shirt Closet...
...L was in the room with him, lurking behind his back with just enough dexterity to disappear every time Light turned his head around. So far, within the hour that Light noticed his presence, L made no move.
Maybe he just wanted to watch Light without his clothes on.
And as long as his intentions remained relatively at bay, Light would allow the bastard the honors.
If L were suddenly to attack him, Light would go straight of his thighs where he stabbed the bastard.
This would prove L is Ryuzaki, though Light was alone and the man would probably have to kill him right away.
Thus, Light concluded, L would make no move, hostile or otherwise.
So to prove the point, he stalked around in his underwear for longer than necessary, striking less than appropriate poses that were totally uncalled for the occasion.
"I want a hippopotamus for Christmas..." Light hummed halfheartedly as he buttoned up his fresh shirt in an uncharacteristically slow way, "and only a hippopotamus will do..."
He could feel a pair of eyes burning into his behind, protected by nothing more than a thin layer of black briefs. If L had a wild imagination, which Light knew he had, those tight briefs could look like a rather attractive vision of tiny shorts. Or worse yet, L would imagine Light without those tiny shorts at all...
And even though the idea was disturbing, Light was having a party.
He knew L was looking, and oh did he know that oh God, L wanted to touch.
Ha, ha, freaking ha.
According to Light's mental assessment of Ryuzaki after yesterday, he figured that a good equivalent of what he was doing right now was something among the lines of strapping the bastard to a chair and making him watch a cake being eaten right in front of his face.
That's right, agony. Light grinned into his sleeve, innocently swayed his half-naked behind and bent very low to pick up a pen that he conveniently dropped.
"No crocodiles or rhinoceroses..."
He didn't have anywhere he had to be in the next four hours, seeing as he dropped collage for the remainder of the semester, and the investigation team was not expecting him until two – and it was only ten in the morning.
Hopefully L won't jump him in the next four hours because hell if he would stop.
No, Light was enjoying this a little too much for his own safety.
"I only like-"
Did he just stroke my ass?!
Light spun around, probably messing up his perfect hair in with the little whirlwind he created, but just like before an empty room greeted his sight.
Bastard.
The room was empty, L hid or ran away or something.
Or maybe Light was just paranoid because he had no idea where a human man could possibly hide in his tiny bedroom and be completely invisible.
And maybe he was putting on this whole show for no other audience than his horny furniture?
He felt a little stupid, but quickly waved it off.
Light Yagami was never wrong.
L was here. L was watching him, and L could not touch him because he was injured, and it would prove that L is Ryuzaki Rue.
Ha.
"I only like hippopotamuses..."
Jeans had to go on, so to finish the show with a BANG Light bent very low again and carefully stepped into a pant-leg.
"And hippopotamuses like me toooo!"
"I will show Raito-kun hippopotamus!"
Wh-
It took less than a second, but L threw him on the bed and pinned him down, face up.
Fucking hell!
No blindfold or anything!
"RYUZAKI!"
"Raito-kun!"
"FUCKING SON OF A BITCH RYUZAKI YOU LET ME GO YOU GODDAMN BASTARD, YOU'RE L, I FUCKING KNEW IT! LET ME GE BEFORE I-"
"Raito-kun needs to shut up! These walls are thin; he must not disturb the neighbors!"
"NEIGHBOURS, L?! I'LL SHOW YOU FUCKING NEIGHBORS, LET THEM COME RUNNING HERE, CALL POLICE AND ARREST YOU, YOU FUCKING MURDURER!"
"I don't know what Raito-kun is talking about. I am not L." said Ryuzaki with a straight face, "now please stop screaming so I can kiss you."
"Not L? NOT L?! ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS! YOU BREAK INTO MY HOUSE AGAIN AND SAY YOU'RE NOT L?! HOW DARE YOU-"
"Breaking into Raito-kun's house does not make me L."
And Light just stared up into Ryuzaki's black eyes.
Dear sweet pie, he was serious!
This... this was ridiculous.
And yet Ryuzaki had a point. Breaking into Light's house did not in fact make him L. It just made him a trespasser.
Light did feel a little stupid after all.
"Mmph! What the hell, don't kiss me!" He spat, trying to wrestle a hand free to wipe his mouth where Ryuzaki just planted a sloppy, wet kiss.
"But Raito-kun is not attacking my eardrums anymore so I must seize the opportunity and kiss him."
"Mhhh mm!"
"Oww!"
Light spat the blood that came from Ryuzaki's lip to the side and stared angrily at the cringing hermit. If the situation permitted, he'd feel sorry for him because he could see tears forming in Ryuzaki's eyes - this grown man with disgusting personal hygiene and eating habits (who was also a serial killer) possessed the ability to be adorable at the least appropriate moments.
But to hell with that.
"Light-kun is dominatrix," Ryuzaki whined, nursing his injured lip.
"Wha-"
"He may not deny it! He stabbed me twice yesterday and bit me just now! He is very cruel. I am afraid I'm not quite into that kind of thing."
"Fuck you. Get out."
"I am really not into that kind of thing, Raito-kun."
Wait a minute...
"Are you trying to convince me that stabbing you in the leg and running away is some kind of mating invitation?!"
"Is it not?"
Oh, I'm not playing this.
"Just get out."
"No."
"Let me go and get out or I'll kick you, and I feel rather kicking you a little higher then your thighs!"
Ryuzaki's expression soured.
"Now Raito-kun is threatening my superior genitals; what kind of absurd foreplay is this?"
Light just stared.
"Out."
"Is this the safety word?"
"Out!"
"Ah, I see! Bondage sex, correct?"
"OUT!"
This was not getting anywhere.
But than again, Light never found himself in a situation as stupid and downright bizarre as this one, so he was probably not handling it right. He was angry, outraged, and maybe just a little more aroused than he would admit, but yelling and ordering was not the way to go about this.
He had to be rational, because the idiocy of this knocked his rationale out of him just like Ryuzaki knocked the air out of him when he tossed him onto his own bed.
With a deep sigh, he evened out his expression as much as he could.
"Ryuzaki-san."
"Raito-kun."
"Okay, first of all I don't remember giving you permission to address me with –kun."
"Is Raito-kun hinting that I should drop the honorific altogether?"
"Ryuzaki-san, I am serious. Stop this... idiocy."
"..."
"Right, now I don't appreciate you addressing me on such familiar terms. I am not your friend or... I'm not your friend."
"I hold a strong argument here, actually, Raito-kun. I am older than you by quite a bit, so I do reserve the right of addressing you with less respect. Considering how long it took you to win the 'Yagami Raito-san' argument, this one is pointless. I will refer to Raito-kun as Raito-kun from now on, and that is not his decision."
"Fine I will deal with that, now, about you kindly getting your ass out of here..."
Despite the more serious tone of the conversation, Ryuzaki was still atop of Light, with his hands firmly pinning Light into the mattress, and an offensive knee planted between his thighs, lingering less then an inch of making contact with a much desired area. His face was hovering over Light's in proximity so close, he could smell Ryuzaki's breakfast cherry pastry and see tiny beads of sweat gathering under the jet-black hair on his temples.
He was very close, and despite everything, Light never really denied attraction to this... vermin. If beauty was in the eye of a holder, than Ryuzaki Rue was the most exotic thing he'd ever seen.
Just that, as a man... eww.
No, Light thought of experimenting, really, he had for quite some time now.
It would be... interesting to experience, in a way.
Sure he'd do it.
In ten years.
And not when his life was at stake.
Oh, right.
His life was at stake.
He totally forgot.
Damn you, Ryuzaki Rue.
"...but I do not wish to leave."
"Yes, but this is my house, and my body."
"Please?"
"Ryuzaki-san! Stay serious!" Light resisted the urge to reach out and smack the idiot at the back of the head, and then he remembered that his movements were restricted, and thenhe remembered the immediate danger of this stupid man, again.
It was less then a second – a moment of distraction, any distraction, and he forgot Ryuzaki was L, again, the single most dangerous criminal mind on the entire world. How the hell...?
No Raito, focus.
"If you don't want to leave, let me go and let's talk this over," deadpanned Light.
"Raito-kun means compromise, yes?"
"Raito-kun means 'listing twenty good reasons why he won't bend over'! Now let me go!"
To Light's surprise, the odd man complied with a cute pout and rolled to the side of the bed.
FOCUS DAMN YOU!
"Thank you, now I want you out of my house."
Instead, Ryuzaki snaked a hand around Light's waist and pulled the boy towards himself in a very hermit-like fashion. If such fashion existed, of course.
"I don't want to cuddle, Ryuzaki-san," Light said coolly and pushed at the man's chest to pull away, "I want you gone. I want your stupid advances to stop. I don't like you. Go away."
Ryuzaki yanked this time and Light ended up on top of him, and then he put both hands on his hips to steady the boy and when Light tried to get off, he just pulled him down like Light had no weight to him at all.
"Stay. You wanted to talk, I also want to talk," he said with a blank face, "seriously, I promise."
"We can talk in the kitchen where there are chairs... and tea?" He tried again with enough effort to indicate that he wanted off, but less than needed to initiate a physical fight to which Ryuzaki would surely respond with force as well.
He gave up after he was yanked down for the third time.
"Stay there."
Light blew an angry puff of air at his bangs.
"What?"
"I like you."
"I can see that. I don't like you, as you might've probably noticed."
"Yes, that seems to be the problem."
"Ryuzaki-san, look," Light started, "I'm eighteen. As you said, you're much older than me. I'm a broke collage student. You're a billionaire. I'm into girls and tennis, you're into me and killing people. I like mashed potatoes and you like éclairs. Seriously?"
"That does not change the fact that Raito-kun's intelligence may only be rivaled by his own beauty."
"That's it?"
"That, and," Ryuzaki added grudgingly, "I also really want to get laid sometime during my visit to Japan."
"Hire a whore."
"Hnn."
"What?"
"I would be disappointed with anyone other than you."
"Well, that's just not going to happen, now do get out before I call police."
"Ah, but I can bribe them away!"
"Not if the responding officer happens to be my father, and I will inform you that he will be carrying an axe."
It was a stupid not-even-joke, his father was not a street cop and an axe did not fit into the police weaponry code, but Ryuzaki's lips twitched upward, and before he could help himself, Light grinned too.
"Will he tie my mutilated body to a tower to show example of what happens to any man who dares to approach his beautiful son?"
"Probably."
Ryuzaki's lips stretched into a full-blown smile and Light started laughing, and Ryuzaki joined him, and then they both were laughing like tots would laugh while eating sand from a sandbox. It was stupid and it released tension, and Light forgot again that he was dealing with a very dangerous person.
He did like stupid Ryuzaki after all.
They had tea and Ryuzaki left shortly after.
But Light was alone now, his logic came back and he realized that he actually offered tea to L, and had a nice conversation about tennis with him in the kitchen, and said 'I'll see you in HQ in a few hours'.
After all the man had done to him, Light told him about a bakery down the street and sweetly waved him goodbye.
Ryuzaki, L, whoever... they were dangerous. Dangerous for his mind. Light trusted him.
After the son of a bitch molested him, twice, threatened to kill him with an L card, lied, attacked him in his own bedroom, Light trusted him.
No, this was not right.
Light could manipulate people, but not to this extant. This was... what Ryuzaki, no what L could do to him...
He had to think, and thinking, at this point of his life, became unpleasant.
L, or L's alias, Ryuzaki Rue, were going to kill him, no matter how nice he seemed.
It did not matter when or where or how. Light would not be allowed to live; they were still playing the game... and the game was played under a set of rules that weren't his, rules he didn't know about, rules his opponent was in direct charge of changing anytime he so wished.
And L was winning.
No, the only possible outcome of this was for Light to lose, and L to win.
His father couldn't help him.
The police couldn't help him.
No one could.
The only way left was for Light Yagami to help himself.
And there really is only one way.
One way.
Light had a vague idea, one he refused to develop any further, a plan, a plot per se, one that will allow him to live a full, clean life whilst eliminating L out of his life once and for all.
He, Light Yagami, with all his manipulative qualities, at young age of eighteen, had all proper equipment to take his talents to a greater extent.
He also knew he would never ever even dare. He believed in justice, fairness and fair game – and he liked L. He wouldn't dare to even allow the development of this... rough idea he had.
But if he were to continue playing just and fair, he would surely die.
The pure nature of Light Yagami's beliefs would allow him to die.
But Light himself would not.
He would live.
And to live meant doing something that would destroy his beliefs, and a man without beliefs was as good as dead anyway.
The only way to truly live was to twist but preserve those beliefs, break all bonds that joined the entity of Light and Yagami Light, the ties that held him together as a person, and re-attach them to where they would not fit.
He had to change.
Light Yagami as he was, had to die. In order to survive severing the extent of his mind, he simply had to not exist as Yagami Light anymore.
Something had to trigger this; something had to destroy him inside.
It was the only way for him to change enough to take drastic measures to preserve his own precious life. It was his only chance.
The only one.
And then, Light suddenly knew.
And the knowledge bolted down his spine, spread though his veins and tickled his fingertips with its icy sensation.
The fear that this knowledge brought was overwhelming.
It had do be done.
Yagami Light loved himself.
And with love, he would have to kill Yagami Light.
Chop off the tree with all its branches and leaves and flowers, saver it completely at the trunk near the roots, raze it.
And then nurture the poisonous yellow flowers that will take root in the dead core of what once used to be Yagami Light.
Dizzy and numb, Light started towards Ryuzaki Rue's L Investigation quarters.
Jamming a determined finger into a random number higher then eight on the elevator of the HQ was a failsafe way to go directly to Ryuzaki's penthouse.
On even feet, Light made his way to the spacious waiting room furnished in white and cream tones.
Founding a suitable one, he lowered himself at edge of a sofa with his back painfully arched and every muscle contracted and tense, as if instead of a plush piece of furniture, he sat on a furnace.
No one said he would do this with his nose high. He was anxious.
Nervously, Light eyed the four surveillance cameras positioned in corers of the room. Surely, there was more. Ryuzaki was alerted of his presence when he entered the floor. He could spy on him though cameras.
Come out, Ryuzaki.
"Raito-kun is early; he said he'll be here in a few hours. I'm afraid the team is not here yet."
Alright, let's get this over with.
"I changed my mind."
"About what, Raito-kun? Andrew Murray is the best British tennis player of all time, yes? I am glad you have come to your senses."
"No, not that. I mean, let's do it."
"Excuse me?"
"I said let's do it. Where's the bed? Let's go."
"Is Raito-kun joking?"
"No."
"...has Raito-kun gone mad?"
"Ryuzaki, please. Before I change my mind."
"...understood. Follow me, please."
The first thing Light did when he entered a large bedroom that looked completely un-slept in, was plop himself on the bed and look uncomfortably the side, suddenly finding the white fabric of the blanket a lot more interesting than the slouched form in the doorframe.
"Raito-kun, this is rather awkward, is this-"
"It's not. Whatever you think it's other than what I said it is, it's not."
"Raito-kun is not making sense," he heard a smirk from the door.
"Well, 'Raito-kun' is nervous as hell so if 'Ryuzaki-san' kindly gets over here sometime this week, it'll be nice, yeah."
"Hmm."
Though Light continued to intently fiddle with the corner of the sheets, he was aware of every sound of the room – from the quiet drone of the air-conditioner, to tiny cracks the furniture made, to quiet shuffling noises Ryuzaki made as the older - man – approached Light across the room.
His back ached from the stiff pose he took on the bed: propped up to make himself appear more comfortable and sure to anyone who might look; in truth his elbows quivered as they were the only support to the unevenly distributed weight of his body. Even the short breaths he took were uncomfortable: small, giving his virtually no oxygen, as quiet as if he never took them at all, with long intervals between each one: regulated, aware, each inhale thought of rather then regular automatic breathing he took for granted.
The mattress beside him dipped signaling that, well, it was on.
"You look very uncomfortable," came from the other side.
"Yeah, well you're about to fix that."
"I don't suppose I will hear the story behind this sudden change of heart?" Ryuzaki's cold fingers tucked a stray lock behind his ear, but Light still refused to turn around.
"Who cares, you're still gonna take advantage of it."
"If Raito-kun is-"
"Would you shut up? Fucking hell Ryuzaki! Work your magic, make me comfortable, do whatever the fuck you were doing back in my house – got me fucking going, but just fuck me before I storm out of here or the taskforce comes in!"
"Hmm."
The outburst – that by the way made Light feel no better, did nothing to make him turn around either, so Ryuzaki, the cunning bastard that he was, grabbed his shoul-
Oh.
The cold fingers of the hand that wasn't cautiously squeezing his shoulder managed to slip under both his jacket and shirt and trace icy circles on his aching lower back.
It was nothing, barely anything, but with the tension and anxiety Light was feeling, this felt like definitely something rather than nothing.
And his back hurt. Should he maybe lie down completely?
No, Ryuzaki's hand was on his back, that'll stop whatever he was going.
But than why was he afraid to do something Ryuzaki didn't like?
Well... it was him, Light, requesting sex, and not Ryuzaki, which was different from this morning...
And if Ryuzaki was L...
"Shh. You're thinking too much," ends of Ryuzaki's silky hair brushed his face and the tiny wind the words created made him shiver...
The pressure on his arms was almost painful as well - he was still supporting his entire weight on nothing but two points of gravity in a very awkward position... so...
Maybe he should finally turn around?
"Still thinking," a chuckle this time, and he was lifted a little and the stress to his arms and back was immediately gone, and then slowly lowered completely into the mattress. Ryuzaki hopped on top of him, and though Light was expecting him to look like a hunter down at his pray, the odd man looked nothing of sorts.
In fact, he looked like he normally would... that was until Light locked his own eyes with Ryuzaki.
Not large black pits of nothingness. No, still black pits of nothingness, but narrowed, half-lidded, serious... He'd seen those eyes before.
Ryuzaki tilted his head and gave Light a measuring look, before lowering himself to make contact with Light's body. It was cold – even his clothes were cold, and because Light's body temperature was normal, the sudden icy contact made him shiver, squint a little and shrink as far into the mattress as the piece of furniture allowed.
Noticing but not quite acknowledging this, Ryuzaki traced a thumb over his cheek and though that was cold too, Light leaned in like he was supposed to.
Nudging Ryuzaki to hurry up was not a good idea; there was nothing to hurry because neighed of them were really aroused, and Ryuzaki was savoring victory after all, so...
A few minutes went by and Ryuzaki just lying atop of him, stroking his cheeks, "still thinking too much," the man whispered and oh did that made Light shiver in something similar to... delight? No, that couldn't be it.
"You're very beautiful, you know, Raito Yagami," Ryuzaki moved his thumb from his check to his lips, "A gorgeous," down to his chin, "intelligent," along his Adam's apple, "bastard," back up and tipped his chin up to expose his throat to an assault that came immediately.
Ryuzaki's lips were warm and quite pleasant; he nibbled rather than kissed and licked rather than bit, and Light kept his chin up to allow whatever came.
He wasn't sure when it got there, but Ryuzaki's hand was slowly crawling up his belly, and when that sweet mouth made its way to his earlobe, Light went for his own buttons.
"None of that," Ryuzaki retracted and took his hand and kissed the open palm, "just lay back and relax."
Trust you?
An invasive knee ledged itself between his legs second time that day, and Ryuzaki leaned back down to plant tiny kisses on his lips, lick, ask permission to enter... Light gave, and that sweet taste of some kind of pie this time invaded his mouth. A sly tongue twirled with his own, and Light was a damn good kisser, so why not?
Yeah, I'll trust you.
Two icy digits pinched his nipple lightly and Light opened wider, and that damn knee was now rubbing against him and he was finally starting to get hard.
When the first tiny moan left his throat, Ryuzaki started undressing him – first went the jacket, then went the shirt, and then Ryuzaki's mouth was all over his chest and Light had to hold himself back when his nipple was nudged, kissed suddenly bitten hard and nursed with soft licking.
The bastard still had his clothes on though, and made no indication he'd lose his pants anytime soon. Oh well, the better; at least Light wouldn't be required to do something humiliating.
But it was kind of humiliating to just lie there and let Ryuzaki do whatever the hell he wanted to do to him, too. He stiffened uncomfortably at the realization but then Ryuzaki reminded him that he was again thinking, and tossed away Light's pants and underwear.
Now it was cold, and Light's cheeks flushed when one of those cold fingers carelessly traced down his shaft. Ryuzaki grinned wildly at that.
That basta-
"AH!" Shit. Light's breath hitched.
A nail. That motherfucker dug his motherfucking nail into the slit, just like that goddamn it, he wasn't even completely erect or anything, and that hurt a little!
"Hey- where you going?" He asked instead when Ryuzaki was no-longer hovering over him.
"Hmm..."
"Oh."
That tongue... that warm, sweet delicious tongue was... oh why are you doing this to me? was licking at the tip, swirling along the assaulted head, and then retracting to make way for the delicious sensation of Ryuzaki's lips tracing the underside... Oh, oh damn... his member stood up proudly and he threw his head back.
Cold fingers – still cold, were carefully massaging his sack in the most wonderful and pleasant manner while Ryuzaki was licking – no, not taking in completely – at the base.
It was... damn it was good, it wouldn't be long...
"You-" Light managed half-gaping half shy to spit it out, "you have to... you know... 'cause I'm gonna... I'm gonna..."
"I said hush, yes?"
Despite the comment, Ryuzaki did retract his mouth, leaving the work to his hand – which was still quite satisfying.
"Suck," he ordered, pressing two cold digits to his mouth. Light obediently took them in and rather then letting them out spit-covered right away, he took the hand into his own and massaged each one with his tongue before allowing them out and taking in Ryuzaki's mouth instead.
"Legs," came another order and Light bent his knees and spread out, though he did tense up when he felt a now-wet finger touching him there...
Ryuzaki kissed him hard and pumped him harder still, and though it was no distraction, it was still wonderfully good... and then it went in.
And it was okay, and it drew out and went in again, and again to the rhythm of what Ryuzaki was doing with his other hand a few inches above, and then another one joined it, and there were two fingers inside of him, just pulling in and out at first and then scissoring, stretching...
Stretching, oh that hurt a little, but Ryuzaki was taking his time and stretching even wider, so Light barely felt against he dull pain of stretching that another finger just went in, except for maybe the cold because his body heat did warm up the other two while they were in there, inside of him, opening him...
It was burning inside a little now; Light assumed Ryuzaki accidentally tore something despite his efforts not to, though that was no surprise...
"Mmm..." He finally let his hands free from whatever restrains he put upon himself and held at Ryuzaki, one hand tangling in the surprisingly soft mass of black hair. It was still okay.
"That will do..." It was the first time that night the aggressor, should he say, of the intercourse was showing signs that he was aroused as well. All activity in his lower regions was withdrawn, and the older, now suddenly very attractive Ryuzaki went to unzip his own pants.
Damn it, Light should've noticed that unmissable bulge and done something about it earlier... ah well, he propped himself up and helped him out of his pants and blue boxers.
Ryuzaki was slightly larger then him, but Light only knew this because he spent endless hours naked in front of the mirror admiring himself. There was barely a difference in size, really.
But now that he thought about it...
Gulping slightly, he lowered himself back into the pillows and tried to relax, because hell that would hurt.
Ryuzaki kissed him on the lips and reached out for what appeared to be Vaseline in the bedside table, and Light watched him as he coated that slightly-larger-than-his-own member with the lubricant.
"Alright, hang on to me," it was a grunt, and indication that the older man had to get some or he'll kill a small kitten.
Hah, way to ruin the mood.
Ryuzaki had a point when he forbid him thinking.
Though Light still did as he was told and grabbed on to Ryuzaki's bony shoulders. His body-heat seemed to have risen and when their naked chests pressed together, Light felt his recently neglected member give a small jerk and despite the fear he wanted Ryuzaki to hurry up.
And yes, he felt that thing against his entrance and he tried to relax his behind as much as possible. Ryuzaki knew what he was doing; he lifted his upper body a little and pulled his cheeks out of the way before ordering Light to hook his leg over his shoulder.
"What is there to hoc- Fuck!"
Ryuzaki moved, moved in, all the way, not slowly to let him catch his breath, but all the fucking way in, painfully, despite the lubrication Light felt like he was torn apart form inside, it hurt, it fucking hurt and unconsciously he pushed against it to somehow get it out...
"Hush," Ryuzaki cooed, stroking his hair and nipping at his clenched lips, "shh, it's alright, relax, let it go..." his breath was shaking, it probably was pretty bad for him too when Light clamped on him like that and he couldn't morally move before Light let go, but to hell with that, it fucking hurt.
The stroking on his member returned and he left a little calmer and let go. Ryuzaki moved, slowly, giving him few experimental slow thrusts and when that did nothing, Light just barked at him to just go on.
"Nnn!" was the sound of his prostate being finally hit, and then again, and many times again, and before they knew it, Ryuzaki was slamming into him and Light was screaming profanities.
It was just sex.
Awkward sex.
Light lay there with his eyes closed loosely gripping at the pillow. His breath was even and the afterglow long wore off.
He just lay there.
Ryuzaki was behind him, probably still in the pleasant haze of after-sex – or just too lazy to move.
It didn't matter. In around an hour or so, Light would have to get up and go downstairs to the investigation quarters and pretend that he just arrived – pretend that nothing happened.
And he could do that.
He'll smile politely and act – act just like he used to. But he felt different.
Today, L, Ryuzaki Rue, or whoever the hell he was, broke something in Light.
Broke it.
And it hurt and nagged like a hemorrhaging wound at the back of his mind. It felt fine as it went on and humiliating seconds after it happened, after realization of what L did to him, after the humiliation as a human being downed him, and would not leave him at peace, ever. There was no way to make it better.
I hate you, L.
You aren't a person, you are a monster. You are evil.
Evil like you doesn't deserve justice.
I hate you.
You won't be able to hurt me ever again because...
I will kill you.