You love simply because you cannot help it.
~ by Kim Anderson ~

Chapter 3

I awoke feeling much better. I guess I caught one of those 24 hour bugs. I looked over and saw Ichigo's bed empty. I slipped out of the closet and headed down stairs. When I reached the bottom I stopped.

"I just didn't know you swung that way, that's all!" I heard Kon's voice say.

"Oh, shut up! I shouldn't have even told you and lower your voice, I don't want to wake him," Ichigo said. I leaned against the wall and listened. Yeah, eavesdropping is rude, but I couldn't bring myself to reveal myself just yet. I held the now dry cloth up against my chest.

"Well, do you know if he even swings that way?" Kon said.

"Would you stop saying that!" I can tell Ichigo didn't sound very happy. I had an idea what "swing that way meant" but I didn't rush to conclusions.

"Fine, do you even know if Toshiro's gay?" I squeezed the cloth tighter now. There it was. Was I gay? Fuck, I didn't even know. I mean I have feelings for Ichigo, but like..........fuck.

"I......I don't know. I mean, it's not something you can really bring up in a conversation." Ichigo's voice sounded different. I heard him sigh. "I'm gonna go see how he's doing."

Before I knew it I was darting up the stairs and jumping in a closet. I quickly fixed the sheets and sat up.

"Ah, you're up," Ichigo said as he came into the room.

"Y-yeah, just woke up," I said in a quiet voice.

"Feeling any better?" he asked and placed a hand on my forehead. I could feel the blood rush to my head.

"Yeah, much better."

"That's good," he smiled "come on, I have breakfast ready down stairs."

It was a quiet breakfast, just the two of us. Kon had left to go upstairs to do god knows what, but he probably left us alone for a reason that involved his and Ichigo's talk before. Eating with my left hand was a little tricky, but I got the hang of it after a few tries.

"So, what do you want to do today?" Ichigo asked as he brought his dish to the sink.

"Um, I don't know, it doesn't matter," I said. My mind was racing at the moment.

"Hey, I know!" Ichigo said "We'll go to the beach!"

"The beach?"

"Yeah! Oh, but you'll need a suit. Mine are definitely to big. Then it's settled, we'll go to a clothes store then the beach!" Ichigo said with a big grin.

Seeing his smile made me feel warm inside, it was very weird.

"Okay," I said absentmindedly.

I looked at my self in the mirror. It was the first time I was actually looking at myself since the war. I rubbed my right shoulder and sighed. I shook my head to get my mind off it and looked down at my suit. The minute we walked into the store Ichigo immediately grabbed these off the rack. They were a sky blue with a dark blue dragon wrapped around the right leg. Now my mind wandered to Hyorinmaru. I haven't had any contact with him.

"Come on, you shouldn't be making Ichigo wait for you!" I said to myself as I grabbed a shirt and ran down stairs. Ichigo was waiting by the door with a bag filled with beach stuff.

"Ready?" he asked as he put on sunglasses. "Here," he handed me a pair. I put them on and my world turned to an icy blue color. I grinned.

"Heh, knew you'd like them." he said. "Well, my world is orange!" he said with pride. I let out a small laugh and saw his grin wide even more.

"And off we go!" he said as he kicked the door open.

The beach was nice and quiet. We set down are blanket and put our sunscreen on. Ichigo must've seen me have a little difficulty so he took it from me and put some on my back. That made my body tense up. I laid myself down and closed my eyes. The sea breeze felt nice. I began to doze off until Ichigo scooped me up in his arms.

"O-oi! What are you doing?" I asked.

"Time to swim!" Ichigo said as he lifted me over my head. Was I really that light? Damn I have to eat more.

"W-wait! Don't throw me in!" But it was to late. I have to say, the wind felt good as I flew through the air, but hitting the water ruined it. I coughed when I reached the surface and rubbed my eyes.

"Hahahah, you alright?" Ichigo asked as he swam towards me.

"Why'd you do that!?" I shouted, but he just grinned. I tried to keep my scowl, but he just kept grinning. I could feel the sides of my mouth twitching upwards. Before I could smile I splashed water in his face.

"Ahhh! Eww, it got in my mouth!" he said as he rubbed his eyes and spit into the ocean.

"Ew, that's disgusting!" I began to swim away, which wasn't that hard with one arm, but my feet just touched the bottom, too.

"Oh, no you don't!" Ichigo said as he grabbed me around the waist. We fooled around like two idiots for about 5 minutes until we discovered a little oasis like place surrounded by rocks. We took a seat, the sun was beginning to set.

"This is a cute little place," Ichigo said. "Man, I never thought I'd see such a playful side of you Toshiro."

I felt my face began heat up again. We sat in silent, I played with the sand, letting it run between my fingers.

"Toshiro, there's something I wanna say." I looked up. "Um, I-uh-I had a great time." he said.

I looked back down at the sand. "That's not what you wanted to say, is it?" I didn't wait for him to answer. "i over heard you and Kon. Ichigo I..............I have feelings for you. Feelings I don't understand just yet. Ichigo I........." I griped the sand in my hand. "I love you."

I felt a cool hand on my face and turn it. I looked into Ichigo's chocolate brown eyes.

"I've been feeling the same," he said. "It's like I can't even explain it, but when I'm around you, it's like ….....i don't know, it's just a wonderful feeling."

"Yeah, I know what you mean." I could feel his breath on my face, we were inching closer.

"Toshiro, I love you."

The space between us was closed as we embraced in a kiss as night engulfed us, bringing a brand new day.