Have I Told You
"Why are you here?" I snapped, looking at Honey suspiciously and then moving my eyes to inspect Peter.
"To make sure you don't leave." She smiled.
"Damn, he's smart." I growled.
"Your father sends his love…" Peter offered. "And he says that if he finds you anywhere near the house before he calls you it'll be all three of our heads.
I nodded.
"So next weekend we're hitting California?" I asked.
"Yes." Honey nodded. "Should we be talking about this in a library? No."
"Fine, how about Starbucks?"
"I hate that place." Honey made a face.
"Well, I was going there next anyways. You can come with or you can stay here." I got up and packed my books.
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I hated the feeling of being alone in the world. I hated when Ben blocked me out. I sat on the ground watching kids playing with their dogs. Peter had stayed with me, but Honey had left to check up on the situation at the house.
I had a feeling something must have happened if I had been out of the loop for three hours. Dominance fights don't last three hours.
I hugged myself because there was a void where Ben should have been. I hugged myself because Jamie could be dead. I hugged myself because it felt like I was holding myself together.
"You okay?" Peter asked.
"I'm fine. I just want to go home." I sighed.
"Well, I think you'll be able to soon." He nodded.
It was ten minutes later before I got the call. And it was ten minutes thirty seconds later before I felt a shift in the universe. I let Peter drive me home.
I opened the door to hear the screaming full blast.
"This is a fluke!"
"He was tired! He just needed to rest!"
"It's not true!"
"Ben!" I gasped, running into the middle of this angry mob that surrounded Mom, Dad, Ben, and Jamie while also encompassing Darryl, Auriele, Honey, Mary Jo, and Warren. I hugged him and just caught a glimpse of his ice blue eyes before he buried his face in the crook of my neck, giving me a moment to realize he smelled like blood and sweat and his appearance matched. I glanced at Jamie who didn't look too badly beaten up. Ben took a deep breath and I felt him shudder. "You okay?"
"How sweet, his mate shows up."
"Dad, what's going on?" I looked at him, careful not to more Ben too much.
"Your father had a brilliant plan he thought he had kept perfectly safe." Mom growled, "And he blew it because he didn't think something like this could happen."
"What?" I blinked.
"Later, Porsche."
"You lied to us."
"I made the decision best suited to keep everyone happy." Dad disagreed.
"The pack is in ruins!"
"If everyone could calm down, they would realize that the pack is not ruined." Dad growled, "I don't see these wolves against me, and it affects them the most."
"Ben, what happened?" I whispered.
He didn't do anything.
It's my fault damn it!
I winced and looked at Jamie because he was looking at me.
"I wasn't in control." He told me apologetically.
"So?"
I looked around, confused before it dawned on me.
"What rank are you Jamie?"
"Second" He said.
But that wasn't the problem.
I closed my eyes.
"That isn't enough for everyone to get worked up about." I frowned.
"Warren's third." Jamie continued. That would mean Darryl was fourth. "Darryl is fifth."
"Are you fucking serious?" I snapped.
"Yes." Mom nodded. "And all of this because your father didn't tell the truth last time Ben moved up in the rankings.
"You faked bottom all of these years when you were fourth and above the second?" I was shocked. "Is that physically possible?"
"Yes." Ben growled.
"You've got to be a saint to have control like that." He half-snorted in disagreement when I said it, but otherwise remained the same. At least he was responsive I suppose.
"You lied to us!"
"Oh my God!" I yelled, "People…wolves…PEOPLE! Okay! Yes, my father is a jerk, why do you think I'm the quote un-quote 'delinquent' that I am? Yeah, okay, he lies, and particularly well, with the damned truth. Obviously, the whole Darryl problem is a fluke, no offense Ben."
"None taken." His response was muffled and I kind of enjoyed the buzzing feeling it made.
"But I can't exactly fix that! A fight may or may not but then again one of them may or may not wind up dead-where is Paul by the way? Oh you know what? Fuck it, he can be dead in a ditch somewhere." I waved my own question off, "Jamie is probably not ready for this, that I will agree with. I've been a wolf longer, God damn it I've been a wolf since I was fucking born! Which I will get into in this rant, no worries." Ben was amused. "And then Warren is obviously deserving of third, we've known he was higher than Darryl for quite some time, did we not? We did, so that is no surprise. This one," I pointed to Ben, "Probably could've come out and told the truth, but where's the fun in that? Then you don't wind up with me giving you a full out lecture!
"Okay so Dad lied while not lying, either that or you're all stupid. Another worry of mine seems to be that no one in this group," I motioned to the people with me, "Are all that upset which leads me to believe that your whole upper ranking members have been conning you. So therefore the rankings are as is unless someone cares to challenge someone else. Technically, I could just call Jamie and then I could be your second but I have a feeling none of you would be too happy with that. That and the fact I am apparently not allowed to fight which I find extremely unfair."
"You're lucky girls can fight at all." Someone shouted, I didn't truly care who it was.
"Not really because fighting is pointless considering I can't hold a fucking rank in this medieval system." I snapped, "I won't be able to at all unless someone cares to fix it. Anyways, back to the matter at hand. Warren is still third, isn't that happy? At least he's the same! Of course he's above Darryl but like I said, we all knew that he was only being held back by this whole aversion to gays you guys have going on. Frankly, I find that unfair too. You know what? Fuck it, there's a lot I find unfair. Your ranks should be Mom, Dad, Jamie, Warren, Honey, Ben, Darry,-or Darryl and Ben…it really depends-Auriele, Mary Jo, and then whoever the hell is next, I may have gotten the orders screwed up because I'm not part of your pack, but oh well. Yeah, Mom would probably be first…either that or a terrifying second…" I looked at her for a moment and then at Dad, "Perhaps they're even. Anyways I still stand by the choice that woman are created equally and are overall better at everything anyways so why not let them have ranks? I'm sorry, being sexist does not work as an answer."
Everyone in the room was silent.
"Come on, Ben," I sighed. "Upstairs we go."
As soon as I closed the door I turned to the bed where Ben lay sprawled out eyes closed, face directed at the ceiling. I moved him over until I had room.
"You okay?" I asked.
"I ruined it." He told me.
"You're fourth…yay…"
"Your father's been nothing but nice to me since I came here," He continued as if I hadn't interrupted. "And I fucking repay him by not keeping my head when it counted."
"Why did you need to keep it? Your poor wolf was probably dying being shut up like that."
"Damn it!" He growled and I was pressed into the bed with him on top of me. "He gave me a home, he gave me pack, he gave me his daughter. I can't keep it together for one second!"
"You kept it together for over fifteen years." I whispered.
"Yeah, and then I blew the whole thing!" He snapped, "Do you know why he put me where he did? First of all, because I was a foreigner in every sense of the word, besides having a right not to trust me with his pack, the pack didn't trust me. He came to me, said 'this is where you are and this is where you are going to stay until you're accepted' because he was at a loss after the Warren incident and the pack was weary. I was just starting to fit in when Warren had the second episode where it was realized he was more dominant than Darryl. The pack didn't accept him now, let alone as their second. Adam chose to keep him lower too, and Warren was just as fine with it as I had been.
"You know the only reason we found out I was more dominant than Darryl too was because you left?"
I winced.
"I know it wasn't your fault, but I went crazy. Your father, Warren, and your mother were the only ones who could keep me from killing someone. It didn't help to know that your father was the one who sent you away." He sighed and rolled off me. "Darryl wasn't okay with it, but your father convinced him that if I ever rose in rank it wouldn't be too much. Then I went and blew it today. I can't believe anyone stood up for him when I was pretty much the biggest secret he's ever withheld from the pack."
"It's not your fault." I assured him. "They were going to find out anyways."
"I wish they found out the right way."
"But that's just it, if my father has kept you from yourself for over fifteen years, when was he going to give you your life back?" I asked.
"After you were pack."
I paused for a minute.
"What?"
"I can't have a mate in another pack, a human mate is fine, a walker mate is obviously fine, a vampire mate is okay, a werewolf mate is perfectly fine, but not if she's in another pack." He sighed. "I don't know why it's in the stupid handbook that no one bothered to print."
"If I had known-"
"We'd be in deeper shit than we already are." He mumbled, "What? Have your father come up and say 'now that Porsche is back in the pack, I've ben deceiving you for over fifteen years! Guess who's more dominant than your second? BEN! Yay! Let's fucking celebrate!'"
I couldn't help but break into laughter because it was not something my father would say in the slightest.
He turned to me and his expression became amused.
"Wish you laughed more often," He sighed.
"Hey, hey, there's been a lot going on! I can't find the time to laugh!" I rolled my eyes. "And it was funny."
"'Suppose." He kind of shrugged.
There was a tiny moment of silence before I climbed on top of him.
"We'll be our own pack." I told him.
"Ha, yeah, and we'll let you be in charge." He chuckled. "That'd be dandy."
"Dandy?" I shook my head, "Never mind 'dandy' it'd be fantastic!"
"You'd kill everyone."
"That is totally true!" I agreed.
"Talk about the Chicago incident." He smiled.
"I probably would." I frowned, "And then Charles would kill me and we'd all live happily ever after."
"We need to find you a hobby other than killing things."
I kissed him, gently at first, of course it never ends that way.
"That is my hobby." I told him. "I can find another one if you so desire."
"I'd rather you not." He pulled my lips back to his.
We had to break apart eventually and finally I decided we had to stop altogether.
"You need to get back downstairs." I sighed, "And you're going to need to help everyone with this whole new transition."
"Come with me."
"Can't can I? They aren't all to happy with me right now, they'd kill me before they'd even think about you."
"All the more reason to come with me." He frowned.
"I'll be fine." I rolled my eyes. "Windows are locked, walking stick is in the corner with its power to materialize and hit any intruder over the head."
"You know it's done that to me." Ben said and I laughed.
"I don't doubt it. I wouldn't put anything past that, now go." He rolled us over so he was on top and just barely brushed his lips against mine before pulling back and getting up. He left and I lay there, his kiss lingering on my lips. I smiled.
"I really do love you."
A/N-
Unfortunately, I can't say thank-you to all the wonderful reviewS and reviewerS because I was quite depressed to only get one. D: tho it wasn't even a review! they left a disclaimer and all that said "Disclaimer: This is not a review"so technically i got one response and NO REVIEWS! i cried because i even gave u all two WHOLE DAYS xD
Notloggedin: well…yeah…i couldn't make him all nice it'd beat the entire purpose of him!
course course
xD well…yeeeaaaah yeah i guess they r xD
IT IS OKAY SO LONG AS SHE EATS DEAD PEOPLE BECAUSE THEYRE NOT IN PAIN! they were gonna rot anyways may as well eat them! gawsh!
She…she…she's currently IN RECOVERY! xD she's under lock and key and bolt and fingerprint recognition and password and voice activations and similar things plus, thanks to adam, i have loads of cameras no worries :) she's fine
i only picked up one and i fixed it (in the chapter at least i have tons in my A/N's) it was "you're" instead of "your" but i did that in 27 and 28 with your and you're and their and there and they're so…
and im sure i have done it loads more but those r the ones i picked up and didn't change xD
i picked up millions in moon bitten but im not retyping that and i don't have the files on this computer tho im considering just re-writing the first few chapters and adding more and better detail
he's not! NO WORRIES! *hides ben in closet* er…hold that thought xD no he's not it was just paranoia i stole from my friend honestly if my bf is cheating on me idc cuz chances r he was not that great a guy xD well…not so much chances as OBVIOUSLY he wasn't that great a guy
kidding about ben…im hiding adam in the closet, ben's in the guest room XDDDDD lmao
I AM! I AM!
And now back to the depressed me:
im going to threaten u all with not updating if i don't get at least a few reviews (a couple a few…doesn't really matter unless ur dating or having sex) so please ignore my last comment in ()'s and REVIEW UR LITTLE HEARTS OUT!
OMG! so there r two new fanfics that caught my eye! im sure a few of u have read them!
Runaway Coyote by QuickStar (1 chapter thus far but she wont update without reviews like me and its an awesome idea so u should all check it out! plus she's an AWESOME writer!)
and
The Ruby Talbot Chronicles by SheWhoRunsWithWolves (at least she's not too stupid to fly xD "…Running Eagle""whats wrong with that?" "too stupid to fly) but she's AWESOME as well and if u adore stefan its an AWESOME fanfic! its got 4 chapters thus far!
BUT DONT FORGET TO REVIEW TO ME AS WELL! cuz then id be depressed, im just telling u bout these guys cuz they're totally awesome as well and deserve more than 4 reviews each!
SO REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! please? i will cry if u don't and i will wait for a few reviews before updating. *crosses arms and pouts*
GIMH