Sever All Ties
Chapter Thirty Four: Disappointment
Disclaimer: I don't own Radiata Stories or any of the characters in the game; they are the property of the brilliant minds at Square Enix.
Author's Note(s): Words in '…' indicate a thought. Words in "…" indicate spoken words. This story will proceed based on the assumption that Jack has joined Ridley on the path of the non-human. This path would inevitably lead him to face his former friends and allies in combat. It is these fights I will illustrate in this story. Some creative liberties will be taken regarding who they face (i.e. Jack will face opponents in this fic that you don't get to face in the game). I hope you enjoy.
When the returning warriors walked into the courtyard of Fort Helencia, they found everyone seated for dinner. Jack was immediately excited by the prospect of food, and was disappointed when Gawain and Lord Zane rose and motioned for the three of them to join him in the meeting room. As they strode across the courtyard, each cast their gaze in a different direction. Gil's eyes followed Lord Zane as he rose and walked toward the hallway, while Ganz watched Gawain rise from his position at the right of Zane and walk toward the same hallway. Jack, however, only had eyes for Ridley. Sitting on Lord Zane's left, her back was to him as he walked the length of the table. He felt his insides sink when she didn't even glance in his direction as he walked past her. Nevertheless, he didn't slow down or look back as he left the courtyard and made his way to the meeting room. When all five had entered the room and seated themselves, Lord Zane spoke.
"What do you have to report, Master Russell," the light elf asked.
"We defeated the blood orc leader in battle," Jack began. "He agreed to release the green orcs, and also to aid our cause. The mission was a success."
"That is excellent news," Lord Zane said. "This will be a great addition to our cause. With the orcs united and fighting along side of us, our chances of succeeding are much greater."
"Let us hope so," said Gil. "It will take some time before the orcs can be mobilized, and they're quite an unstable lot."
"Nevertheless, I am pleased," Lord Zane replied. "This is the kind of progress we needed to make in order to position ourselves for victory."
"A victory that will soon be at hand," Gil said, smirking.
"If all that's left is the gloating, I'm going to take my leave," Jack said, sounding annoyed.
"I do believe that eating and resting would benefit all of us," Ganz said quickly, not wanting tempers to flare.
"Of course," Lord Zane said, smiling. "Please, go enjoy yourselves. You have my thanks for your help."
Jack and Ganz walked out of the room and into the hallway, while the other three stayed behind. When they returned to the courtyard, everyone looked up. The two former knights quickly found seats and help themselves to food. Jack listened absentmindedly to the various conversations going on around him, and ate in silence. He couldn't prevent his eyes from drifting to Ridley, who was only four seats down from him. Though he continually looked in her direction, she did not so much as glance in his. When the meal had concluded, the occupants of Fort Helencia all scattered as they attended to their evening duties. Jack remained seated and watched as Ridley stood up and walked toward her room. He quickly finished the rest of his meal, and rose to go after her. As he rose to go, he felt a hand on his arm. Ganz was giving him a stern look.
"You are in a delicate situation, Master Jack," Ganz said. "Please don't do anything to make it worse."
"I have to talk to her, Captain," Jack answered.
"I wish you luck," Ganz said with a smile.
"Thanks," Jack said.
Ganz released his hold on Jack's arm, and the younger warrior walked across the courtyard. Every step took him nearer to Ridley's room. As he was walking, Jack realized that he had no idea what would happen when he got there. The two of them had started off so well, it seemed impossible that things could have gone so wrong. He only knew that something had to be done. Things could not stay as they were. In the beginning, he had been completely sure of himself. He and Ridley had confidence in each other. Then, his confidence had been shaken; though Ridley had maintained her faith in him, he had lost faith in himself. Now, just a short time later, their positions had been reversed. He had regained his confidence, but Ridley no longer seemed to believe in him. Something had to change. The hallway seemed to stretch on forever in front of Jack as he continued to walk. His mind was racing. He thought about everything that had happened to the two of them, all of the good and bad times. He relived every moment and every word. As his hand reached out for her door, he finally found the answer.
Back in the meeting room, Gil had excused himself, leaving Gawain and Zane alone. The two were, as always, poring over maps, reports, and books, attempting to determine the non-humans' next move. They were seated opposite each other at the table, and were working on separate projects. Neither spoke a word, and the only noise came from the clock on the wall, and their pens and papers. Long minutes went by, and Zane put his pen down and looked at Gawain. He quietly cleared his throat, to signal that he wished to speak. Gawain set his work down as well, and looked at Zane.
"There is much going on that I am curious about," Zane said.
"What do you have in mind," Gawain asked in response.
"We seem to be splitting duties now, you and I," Zane began. "I am leading the war, and you are watching over the vessel. How is she?"
"The vessel is fine," Gawain answered. "Ridley Silverlake is not."
"I only asked about the vessel," said Zane.
"Well, the vessel is Ridley," Gawain said firmly. "And the reason the vessel is doing so well is because Ridley is not. You need to understand and appreciate what has happened to her, and what is happening as we speak."
"Very well," Zane said.
"Ridley has changed a great deal since coming here," Gawain added. "She has grown as a person. When Ridley first came here, she only knew that she was different. She knew that she was tied to the fate of the non-humans, but she was not fully aware of her role as the vessel, and what it entailed. I knew from the moment I saw her, and talked to her frequently. She changed a lot in the beginning. There were many things she didn't understand when she arrived, but she became stronger and more confident. She was sad, and became happy. She and Jack enhanced each other. Then, things worsened. After Hap took over her body on the bridge in the Ocho Region, and she struggled for control of her body, I knew it was time to tell her the truth. I think she was relieved to finally know what was happening to her. She was grateful to have the uncertainty removed. Ridley understood and accepted her fate almost immediately. She knows the stakes, and is willing to sacrifice her life to restore order to the world. In a matter of days, she will give up her life so that the Changeover can occur."
"I see," Zane nodded. "So, Jack Russell will accompany her on this mission?"
"No," Gawain said. "Though Jack has pledged to protect her, she will not have him come with her. I will be going."
"She has lost faith in him," asked Zane.
"I don't think so," Gawain replied. "She knew all along how difficult his path is. He faltered along the way, but I don't think she ever stopped believing in him. That's just the problem. She is afraid that Jack will stop her, that he will prevent the Changeover in order to protect her. She wouldn't come out and say it, but she is afraid that she will stop herself for Jack. They care deeply for each other, but it just isn't meant to be. She knows that, and is trying to distance herself from him."
Jack knocked gently on the door and waited patiently for Ridley to answer. She looked somewhat surprised when she saw him standing in front of her. Nevertheless, she opened the door and gestured for him to enter. Jack and Ridley silently seated themselves in the room's two chairs. They watched each other for some time, neither speaking. When Jack looked into the deep green of Ridley's eyes, he was able to see and know much. He saw many conflicting emotions. She seemed to have acquired a new determination, but was also uncertain. She was both confident and afraid. Most of all, she appeared to be sad. Ridley saw much in Jack's eyes as well. The hardness that had been there only days before had receded somewhat, and he looked much more like the Jack she hoped for him to be. He looked tired, as if neither his body nor mind had been allowed to rest. He was clearly struggling with many things; he was weary as if the burden he had been carrying was finally going to crush him under its weight. Finally, it was Ridley who spoke.
"Jack, we need to talk about last night, and the last few days," she said.
"I agree," Jack said with a nod. "It would have been nice to have you along today."
"What I did last night was wrong," said Ridley. "I know what you've been going through, and I was unfair."
"What I've been going through doesn't excuse what I did," Jack replied. "But, neither of us can change what we did. So, it's really a question of where we go from here."
"It was the bridge, wasn't it," Ridley asked, cryptically. "That's when everything really started to change. After the bridge. With the Argent Faucon."
"I suppose it was," Jack answered.
"Since then, everything has gotten worse," Ridley said somberly. "For everyone. For the humans, for the non-humans, for us."
"Yeah," Jack agreed. "It hasn't exactly been perfect. All sorts of things have gone wrong; things that we could have done differently, and things that were beyond our control. I still can't help but wish things could have been different."
"I know, Jack," Ridley said. Her voice sounded sad as she continued. "Believe me, I know. It's hard to believe that things have changed so much in such a short amount of time. I haven't exactly been perfect this whole time, either."
"It doesn't matter," Jack said. "I meant what I said before, Ridley. I'm here to protect you, to support you in whatever you do. Maybe things can't go back to the way they were, but that doesn't mean there's no hope at all. We're here now, and that's more than enough. As long as we're working together, there's nothing we can't do."
"Jack," Ridley said softly. "I wouldn't be who I am or where I am without you. But, I'm afraid I don't know if that can happen. I've changed too, Jack. I've changed a great deal. I'm not sure we're on the same path anymore."
"That's not true," Jack said firmly. "After everything we've been through, you're just going to tell me that it meant nothing?"
"It wasn't nothing," Ridley answered. She had to take a deep, calming breath before continuing. "Believe me. It meant a lot. But, you and I are on different paths, now."
"It can't be," said Jack. His eyes reflected the hurt and confusion he felt inside.
"Please, try to understand," Ridley pleaded.
"But, I," Jack started. He stopped himself in mid-sentence. A moment later, he let out a soft sigh. "What was it? What changed your mind?"
"A lot of things," Ridley replied. "Things that happened to me. Things that happened to you. Things that happened to everyone around us."
"When did it happen," Jack continued.
"I…I don't know," Ridley answered. "I couldn't say for sure. But I know it now."
"This is what you want then," Jack concluded.
"I…yes," said Ridley.
"All right," Jack said, standing up. "When I fought Elwen, she reminded me why I fight. I fight for you. She reminded me that I am fighting to help you achieve your desires. I want whatever you want. I want you to be happy. So, I'll do what you wish."
"Are you going to stay," Ridley asked, rising out of her chair.
"I don't know," Jack answered. He began to walk toward the door. "I don't have anywhere else to go. I wish things could have been different."
As the door closed behind Jack, Ridley sank to the floor. Tears welled up in her eyes, and she did nothing to stop them. She sat for long minutes staring at the floor. She couldn't contain the sorrow any longer. As she began to cry, she thought of all the time she and Jack had spent together. He had always been there for her, and she had been forced to push him away. Ridley could feel the time of the Changeover drawing nearer, and knew that she didn't have much time left. Her soul was once again at odds with the light elf inside of her. Hap was telling her that she was making the right decision, and part of her agreed. But, part of her wanted to run down the hall after the boy who had done so much for her. As the sound of Jack's footsteps faded away down the hall, she spoke softly.
"I wish things could have been different too, Jack," Ridley whispered. "I finally understand how you've felt since coming here. This is what it is to hurt someone dear to you. I'm so sorry."
"So, Jack Russell's actions have all been in vain," Zane stated. "Does he know?"
"Of course not," Gawain said. "He only knows that Ridley and Hap fought for control of her body while he went to Fire Mountain. He doesn't know about the Changeover. Which will make it hurt all the worse when everything happens. The two of them share a special bond, something that is not easily broken. He won't understand, but he will accept her decision. More than anything else, Jack desires Ridley's happiness. He knows he's hurt her and let her down, so her decision will make enough sense that he will accept it without too much questioning. I don't know what he'll do when he finds out about her real motives, but it will likely be too late by then."
"You've felt it too," Zane asked.
"Yes," answered Gawain. "Destiny is pulling us into place. It is only a matter of days before the Changeover occurs."
Back in his room, Jack was laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He was trying to figure out where things had gone wrong. It had not been that long ago that he had held her close to him outside Algandars Castle. Not that long ago, he had been holding her hand at the Journey Pig; it was a silly game that they had played, but it had been wonderful. Only a few days before, he had gotten the courage to tell her how beautiful she was. From the night they had left Radiata, Jack protected and supported Ridley in everything she did. Now, he was losing her. Her decision had not been a complete surprise. He knew the night they left Radiata that failure was not an option, and he had failed her. His poor decisions had put them in jeopardy on more than one occasion. There was also his defeat on Fire Mountain. His failure there was bad enough, but his reaction had been worse. His weakness had nearly overcome him that day. She certainly had reason to leave him behind. So, what was left?
'Is this really the end,' Jack wondered. 'This isn't how it was supposed to end. I was supposed to tell her how much I cared for her, and everything was supposed to be okay. I guess I don't really have a choice. Then, what was all of this for?'
"Ridley approached me earlier with her decision," Gawain continued. "She told me that she had accepted her role as the vessel, and asked that I be the one who accompany her to fulfill her destiny."
"As she should," Zane replied.
"I wouldn't go that far," said Gawain. "It's easy to say something like that when your life isn't on the line."
"She has a duty," Zane stated. "And she must fulfill it."
"But, you don't know what it means for her to do her duty," Gawain added. "Human love is something you will never understand, Zane."
"You're right in that regard," said Zane. "But, it doesn't matter."
"Not to you," Gawain began. "Because you don't know what it means. You don't understand what Jack and Ridley are going through. He is losing the one he loves, and is powerless to stop it. She is being forced to give up her love because of this duty you expect her to fulfill."
Vegeta26: And here's another quick update for you. Aren't you all lucky? Anyway the plot continues to evolve and thicken. Who knows where things will go from here. As always, thanks for reading, and please review.
Cisqua: Thanks, as always, for the review. The last chapter was a little short, but this one was a little longer. And, it contained some of that drama you requested. Hope to hear from you again.