Genre: Angst
Character(s): Sirius Black
Words: 427
Rating: G
Written: November 14, 2005
Differences
I could barely comprehend what I was seeing as I stared in feared disbelief at the tiny creature bundled in my arms, a baby wrapped warmly in the blanket his mother had charmed for him the day of his birth.
I opened my mouth, trying to call for them, Remus, anyone at all, but no sound came. I could feel the salty burn of tears as they built up behind my eyes.
Why was no one responding to my sobs? Mews of fear, pain, loss and disbelief. I parted my now dry lips and shouted for help again, the plea coming from the back of my parched throat.
I wanted to hear the sound of Lily's laughter and James's chuckles, each confessing their parts in this sick practical joke, and then hear he sincere apology when they realized what they had just put me through, I wanted to feel James clapping his hand down on my shoulder, I wanted to feel Lily wrapping her arms around me in the apologetic way she always did. But no. There was no laughter, and no warmth from sudden contact, just the soft crying of baby Harry. It was in that brief moment of silence that I felt my heart break in two, all my air being sucked from my lungs, and my blood rush cold.
I pressed the knuckles of my left hand against my tongue, closing my teeth on my fist. I leaned my back against the wall, and slid down it so I was sitting on the floor. It was then that I squeezed my eyes shut and let hot tears roll down my cheeks as the realization dawned on me.
They were dead. They were really, truly gone. But how? I asked myself, lowering my head so it rested gently on Harry's head. They were so young!... How could he do something like this? How could Peter betray someone who had treated him like a brother? How could be betray the one woman who accepted him as he was and loved him for it? How could he do this to this innocent child?
Still, I cried. Still, I didn't understand why no one was coming to force me to share why my tears existed.
I stood there, my back shielding Harry from the cold for what seemed like hours, struggling to control my breathing as I mourned the loss of my two best friends. The loss of two people who were so complete, so in love, so young. Too young to die, or to know this pain.