Second Time Around

A Private Practice fic by Gigi

Disclaimer: As much as I wish it weren't so, the only part of Private Practice that I own is what I create in Gigi-land.

Chapter 2: Back Again

A/N: I'm glad that other people thought this concept was as compelling as I do. It makes me happy and when I'm happy, I write more. Yay for happiness!

At some point in the night, Pete had drifted off to sleep, but when the sun crept up onto his face, interrupting his slumber, he opened his eyes to see Addison fingering the sheet covering her and staring at the ceiling.

"Addison?" he started quietly, hoping to get her attention.

She didn't answer him, not directly. Her eyes never left the ceiling as she voiced her thoughts. "I didn't think I was still this person."

"What person?"

"The person who cheats on her husband. I thought I had learned from what happened to my marriage to Derek after he found me in bed with his best friend. I thought that two months alone in New York with the best friend who still cheated on me, followed by a year and a half spent in Seattle watching my husband pining for someone else and then leaving me for her...I thought that was enough to beat it into my head that none of that would have happened if I hadn't cheated," she answered dejectedly. Turning her head on her pillow so she was looking at Pete, she stroked his cheek. "Not that I regret last night at all, because I don't. I know that this time is different, but I still feel like I'm cheating."

"Listen, Addison," Pete ordered, taking her hand from his face and clasping it in his hand. "I know you still love Kevin. I understand that there's no way you can just get rid of all that love in one night." Addison's eyes shone with newly formed tears that threatened to spill over.

"I do," she breathed. "I do love him, and I hate that I still love him."

"Love doesn't just disappear, I know that," Pete continued, "but no matter what happens or who you choose, I'm always going to be here for you, even if it's just as a friend."

Addison smiled sadly, her eyes falling to their hands. Her wedding rings shone there like a blatant reminder of her second failed marriage. "I should leave him. I know I should leave him," she declared quietly. "But Derek took me back after I slept with his best friend, and sleeping with the best friend is a whole lot worse than sleeping with a random woman. Derek gave me another chance. Shouldn't I give Kevin another chance?"

Pete wanted so much to yell "No" at the top of his lungs, but that wasn't what Addison needed just then. So he just stroked the back of her hand softly. "If you think he deserves another chance, then you should," he told her. "But he needs to know that it is his second chance. You need to tell Kevin you know about Karen."

Shifting underneath the covers, Addison moved so she was curled up in his chest once more, with Pete's arms wrapped around her bare back. Tears slowly fell out of her eyes and lost themselves in his chest hair. "Thank you for taking care of me," she whispered.

8D

Addison sat at her dining room table and stared at the empty chair in front of her. Her hands clasped each other to keep her from biting the hell out of her nails as she waited. Nervously, Addison glanced at the clock hanging on her wall.

3:47 p.m.

Kevin usually got home at 3:45 p.m. on the dot. He was never late, not even by two minutes.

Addison checked her wristwatch, hoping her wall clock was just fast.

3:47 p.m.

He'd only ever been late coming home when they were hot on some guy's trail, and even then he always called.

Addison picked up her BlackBerry, which had been resting on the table beside her hands, and turned on the screen to check the time on that.

3:48 p.m.

Suddenly, Addison hoped he would take longer to come home, because she realized she hadn't thought of what she would say. She'd spent all day just talking herself into confronting him, but that took so much time and effort that the follow-through completely fell off the wagon.

Should she even tell him she knew? Because she didn't really have any validity in being hurt when she had just slept with Pete. Well, she did, but he wouldn't see that way. Not that she was going to tell him.

She heard the door open and Kevin walked down the hall shortly after. He flashed her a smile and pecked her on the lips as he dropped his keys and gun in his drawer. "Hello," he greeted, flushed as if he'd rushed to get home on time.

"Hey," she said, spacing out a little.

Kevin joined her at the table, taking the seat next to her and peering into her face. "Are you okay?"

Bite the bullet, Addison. Just rip off the band-aid that covers that bullet hole. Addison mentally slapped her forehead. Great, now I'm mixing metaphors.

Taking a deep breath, she focused on her husband. "Are you unhappy, Kevin?" she finally asked.

Confusion was written all over the SWAT's face. "Of course not. Why would you think anything else?"

"Because you keep taking all these extra shifts two, three times a week," Addison began, losing her nerve to actually confront him about the affair. "And you're only home long enough for dinner before you have to go again. The only nights you're here before I'm asleep are the nights we have sex."

"Addison," Kevin stopped her, grabbing hold of her hands. "I don't want you thinking I'm not happy, because that is not true. I'm extremely happy. I have an amazing wife, a job I love, and a gi—great life." Addison swore she saw, just for a second, guilt flash in his eyes. "I wouldn't want to change any of it."

I'll bet you wouldn't, she thought wryly. Immediately, she hated herself for thinking that. She couldn't think that if she wanted them to work.

"Then why are you never here?" Addison continued. "I'm not a demanding person when it comes to attention, Kevin, just that you pay me some every once in a while." Her mind flashed back to five years ago, when Derek had been absent toward her, when Mark suddenly paid her all the attention in the world. "I feel like we're just going through the motions, and the only time you notice me is when I'm in lingerie or nothing at all."

"That's not true," Kevin protested.

"But it is," Addison insisted, suddenly seeing an opening. "I'm not saying you need to constantly buy me things, but the only thing you've gotten me in the last few months is a piece of lingerie, and you didn't even give it to me. You just stuck it in the closet."

Now Kevin looked really confused. "What lingerie? I never bought you any lingerie," he said. His eyes widened slightly in horror when he realized whose it must be.

"Then why is there a new, incredibly short negligee dress in my closet?" she asked innocently.

Kevin's face paled as he scrambled for an answer. "Are you sure it's not the maid's?"

"Kevin, is the dress for somebody else?" Addison questioned slowly. Come on, be the bigger man, Kevin, she urged. If you love me, just tell me the truth. "It's okay if it is. I mean, it isn't, but I'd forgive you."

Kevin hesitated before shaking his head firmly and answered, "No, there's nobody else."

There it was. Kevin didn't confess, but he made it painfully obvious the affair wasn't all in Addison's head.

Faking a smile, Addison nodded and stood up. "Do you want some dinner? I'm making pasta and grilled chicken."

8D

Pete sat on his couch, his eyes trained on the television screen, his mind in a whole other place. She went back to him. He couldn't believe she went back to him. Well, he could, actually. She wouldn't be her if she didn't fight like hell for her relationship.

But still.

The doorbell ringing snapped Pete out of his reverie, and he got up from the sofa and ambled to the door. Swinging it open, he saw Addison standing on his doorstep, clutching her purse-strap like it was a lifeline.

"I gave him a chance to tell me," she declared softly, "and he lied straight to my face." She looked up at Pete with watery blue eyes and red cheeks. "He left again tonight."

Pete reached out for her elbow and ushered her into the house, closing the door behind him and leaning against it. He slowly took her coat, keys and bag and placed them on the hallway table before wrapping his arms loosely around her waist.

"I'm still here," he whispered, closing the distance between himself and Addison.

A/N: So what do you think? My eyes kind of hurt right now, and I'm starting to get a major headache (college applications—just peachy), so I'm ending the chapter here. I hate making Kevin an asshole, but I couldn't make him be all sweet to her either, because that would totally not make any sense. Okay. I've rambled enough. Your turn. REVIEW.