I'm Back
Sara blushed profusely and lowered her head. "God now I'm really embarrassed first the pads now the kiss, I wasn't sure I had said that or not." She whispered to herself.
"What was that Sara?" Brass asked while he was trying to keep from laughing.
"Nothing just forget it. Can you guys give us some privacy please?" Nancy gave her a knowing look. "I promise I will not climb into her bed." Brass and Nancy left the room. "Cat, I just wanted to thank you for what you did out in the desert."
Catherine looked a little confused at first then her head cleared a little. Catherine held her hand up for Sara to take which Sara did willingly. "Sweetie I was just returning the favor. You could have left me there and saved yourself but you didn't. Besides if I think back all the way to the beginning of this you were ready to trade yourself for me."
"Of course I was, and I would do it again he was after me not you. If it weren't for me you wouldn't be in that bed right now. You'd be home with Lindsey instead of here."
"We can talk about Lindsey later I want to talk about us."
"Cat I want to talk about us too but I want to do it when you aren't high and I know you will remember the conversation and we can discuss what to do."
"Sara look at me, look at my eyes. The drugs are slowing down and right now I am starting to feel the pain in my head and soon I'm going to want to know what the bandages are all about but right now you are what is important to me. I know that Eddie is going to be a problem, he has the divorce papers already but he won't sign them yet. I'm not sure why."
"Maybe he doesn't want to give up his control over you just yet." Sara smiled.
"Hey no one controls me!" She looked up in time to see Sara's smile. "Oh you think I'm going to let you get away with a comment like that?"
"You think I don't know that no one can control you? You are the most independent woman I have ever known and I don't think there is a man or woman alive that will ever be able to control you."
"Oh I don't know Sidle, there are ways I may let you control me if you'd like to give it a try." Sara blushed. "Oh that blush is so cute. At least I know we are thinking alike."
"Behave yourself. Are you sure you want to talk now?"
"When else do you think we will have a chance? Now is as good a time as any. Lindsey already thinks you rock. Her words not mine. Apparently you sat and talked with her at the lab one night and she has worshipped the ground you walk on ever since. 'Mom Sara is soooo cool', 'Mom when can Sara come over?'. And apparently you email her on a regular basis and she talks to you. I didn't know she even knew how to use the internet let alone email. And you say you're not good with kids."
"I didn't know you knew about that. Why didn't you say anything? I'm sorry if I stepped on any toes. "
"Of course you didn't sweetie. If I didn't like it I would have stopped it and I didn't say anything because I didn't want to change anything with you and Lindsey and you may have acted differently if you knew I knew. Now enough of that, what do you want from a relationship with me?"
"I think it is going to take some time getting used to straight to the point type of conversation your family apparently likes to use. Ok lets talk. At first I thought my feelings were just a crush, I tried to get over it by chasing after Grissom. Did you know he kissed me once?" At Catherine's grimace she smiled and continued. "That's kind of how I felt afterwards. I just about resigned myself to the fact that I could never have you. I thought I could deal with my feelings but every time you walked into the room my heart would flutter and I couldn't deny how I felt. I was proud when you did something good, I was sad when you were sad, I hurt when you hurt and I was jealous as hell when you went out on a date. Those date nights were the nights when I would go home and drink myself to sleep. I've never been good with relationships but I would really like to try with you. I want to take care of both you and Lindsey."
"Baby I wish I had known. Ever since you and those long legs walked into the lab it was always you. Eddie and I had been over for a long time before that and I went out on dates but I paid the price because what's good for Eddie was not good for me, he hated it when I dated other guys and he showed his displeasure with his fists. The dates have always been a substitute for you. I watched you chase after Grissom and it made me sick. I would go out and find someone to occupy my mind for a few hours and then I would go home sick to my stomach because nothing had changed. You were still unattainable and no matter how many guys I slept with I still wanted you. And I still do. But I don't just want you in my bed. I want you sitting down with Lindsey and I for breakfast in the morning, I want you waiting for me when I come home from work if you had the night off and I want to be waiting for you when you come home on my night off. I want to be the one you come to if you have a bad case and I want to come to you and have you hold me when I have a particularly hard case."
"Wow!" The smile on Sara's face was priceless. "I guess I never thought there would ever be a chance that you would return my feelings but to hear it put that way is humbling. I want that too Cat, I want everything."
"Why do I think there is a 'but' coming?"
"Because there is. As much as I would love to act on these feelings I can't as long as you are married. I don't want to give Eddie a reason to hurt you and if he does try I want to have the right to defend you." She held up her hand as Catherine started to protest. "I know you can defend yourself and I will only do so if completely necessary but I want the right to do so. But I can't claim that right as long as you are married to him. I don't want to put any pressure on you and I won't, I will wait for you for as long as it takes." She looked up at Catherine and was surprised to see tears in her eyes. "Baby I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you cry. Please don't cry." She stood up to wipe a tear from her cheek but in doing so she hurt her side and winced.
"Are you ok?" Sara nodded silently and couldn't stop herself from caressing Catherine's cheek and she almost groaned when Catherine closed her eyes and leaned into the caress. Sara moved her hand and sat back down. When Catherine saw she was ok she continued. "They're happy tears so don't worry. No one has ever wanted to do that for me. No one has ever wanted to take care of me. To Eddie I have always been a piece of property to control, to the men I danced for I was always just a piece of ass to ogle and fill their fantasies and to Grissom I have always been someone he could mold into a good CSI. I owe him everything but I think I have more than paid my debt to him by becoming a damn good CSI. But no one has just wanted to take care of me. Not even my own mom could do that. I will see what I can do with Eddie, the sooner the better and it will be worth it to know you will be waiting. Can't I even get a little kiss?"
Sara smiled and evil smile. "Do you think that would be wise?"
"We won't know until we try."
"So maybe we can look at it as an experiment. Who knows, maybe there won't be any sparks and all of this will be for naught. We'll kiss and go our separate ways and we can both get over it right?" She looked up at Catherine and saw the same doubt in her eyes that she knew was in hers. "Ah hell who am I kidding, there are sparks when we just look at each other so why the hell wouldn't there be sparks when we kiss. Maybe just one ok?"
"Sure Sidle just one we'll see about that." Sara stood up slowly this time and was careful of all the equipment around the bed. She leaned over and slowly brought her lips down to meet Catherine's in a tentative kiss. She gasped when their lips made contact and that was all the encouragement Catherine needed to deepen the kiss. Catherine brought her hand up and placed it behind Sara's head and pulled her closer. Sara didn't respond immediately but it didn't take long for her brain to kick in and realize that she really was kissing Catherine. This was not a dream and she slowly brought her tongue out to touch Catherine's lips and was granted access to the smoothness that was Catherine's mouth. Sara both heard and felt the moan from Catherine's lips and she thought it was the sexiest thing she had ever heard.
Reluctantly she pulled back and rested her forehead against Catherine's forehead. "Wow! I mean… Wow!"
"Yeah, I would have to agree with you." Both were breathing heavily.
"Well I guess that didn't help matters much did it?"
"I think it answered the question as to whether there would be sparks or not. Those were definitely sparks shooting everywhere. Check the machines and make sure we didn't short anything out. We might be in trouble if anyone was watching my heart monitor, I'm surprised someone didn't come running in here to make sure I was ok."
Sara jumped back as if she had been burned. "Oh God I forgot about. That may not have been a good idea, your heart might not be strong enough for this yet."
"What are you talking about there's nothing wrong with my heart." Sara sat down again and took Catherine's hand in hers. "Sara what is it, what aren't you telling me."
"Just after I woke up in the room next door Julie was talking t me and all of the sudden the monitors in your room went crazy. She went running out of my room and into yours. I climbed out of my bed and made my way over to the window and they were performing CPR. Your heart had stopped and I was so scared you were going to die. Nancy and I stood there helpless and all we could do was cry. Now here I am practically attacking you hours after that happened."
"One kiss is not attacking me and I was a willing partner in that kiss, very willing. But I guess that explains why my chest hurts so much." At Sara's worried expression she went on to explain. "Sweetie it hurts from the CPR not from any heart problems. Will you lay down here with me?" She held up her hand when she saw Sara was going to argue. "What are they going to do? Kick us out of the hospital? Come on, if we're careful we can do this." She saw Sara's determination weakening so she pushed on before Sara talked herself out of it. "I'll sleep better if you are with me." She even added puppy dog eyes to cement the deal.
"Oh that is so not fair. Now I see where Lindsey learned it from. How am I supposed to resist that?"
"You're not supposed to, now get up here before someone comes to take you away." Sara moved around to the other side of the bed so that most of the machines and wires were on the other side and her left side would be to the outside away from Catherine. She gently lay down and slid her arm under Catherine's shoulder and lay back. Catherine put her head on Sara's shoulder and placed her arm on Sara's stomach careful not to touch her injury. "I can tell your side hurts can you tell me what they said?"
"I guess it was more than a scratch." Catherine raised her head and gave Sara a look that said 'duh' and lay her head back down. Sara made sure Catherine was comfortable before she continued. "It was actually a stab wound that went pretty deep. I still don't even remember him getting close enough to get me that good. Must have been adrenalin that kept me going as long as I did. The wound was deep enough to cause a bit of internal damage…" Now it was Catherine's turn to jump back afraid she was hurting Sara. "You're fine, more than fine actually. I guess there was some internal bleeding and it nicked the liver. But they stitched everything up and with some rest I should be good as new." She saw Catherine fighting sleep so she started to brush her finger through her hair and soon Catherine was fast asleep and it didn't take long for Sara to fall asleep too.
Nancy carefully opened the door to Catherine's room and had to smile at the scene before her. She motioned for Julie to come over. Julie looked in the room and turned to Nancy. Julie reached past Nancy and pulled the door closed and then turned to back to her. "You were so bad to watch her heart monitor. It was almost like being a peeping tom. And then to keep watching it to see when it leveled out to know when she fell asleep. As long as they sleep I guess it won't hurt to leave them alone. How could you know that Sara was asleep too?"
"She was fighting sleep the whole time we were in her room and I knew she wouldn't sleep until Catherine did. So as soon as Catherine's heartbeat slowed I knew it wouldn't be long before Sara fell asleep. She was either going to fall asleep in her chair or on the bed. You owe me five buck by the way. Told you I knew my sister would be able to talk her into her bed."