Hi, Kiddies! It's friday, so new chapter *cheers*
Ok, so before we get to the good stuff, just a quick message about our contest. Last weeks winners were MaMa HedgeHog who requested an IchiRuki and rkfolower who asked for a HitsuMatsu, and there's also our first week's winner, Achalys, who requested a Hitsugaya drabble. Ok, so now comes the part where I humbly beg for forgiveness hehe... I've been really busy this week, so I haven't gotten the time to start your drabbles. I haven't forgotten about them though, so I'll get to it this weekend and let you all know. I apologize for the tardiness.
Now, the good stuff. Remember Byakuya was at the door first, and then he was holding Rangiku. What shall Byakuya be doing this week? Read and find out.
Enjoy, kiddies!
Disclaimer: All Bleach characters are Kubo-san's property. If they were mine some wicked things would happen, but I own nothing.
---------------X-------------
My conversation with Rangiku had derailed from its original purpose, but what intimidated me the most was that I couldn't bring myself to care for this.
"I should go now." I stated in an attempt to escape the situation, even as my hand was entertained by her hair.
"Must you?"
"Yes." I replied, one last attempt to keep composure. "That is, of course, unless you can provide a reason."
"Do you really need one, Byakuya?" She answered, her head leaving my shoulders to look up at me.
"Not really, but…"
I knew it. She knew it. We read it in each other's eyes. There was no escaping the situation, and I was sure neither of us wanted to.
She, however, was so kind as to provide me with a reason, knowing this was only to appease any worries that might arise after this ended.
"Damn the consequences, Byakuya."
The hand that gently played with her hair travelled to her cheek. Before I could stifle the urge, my lips had pressed onto hers, softly kissing her.
Her arms came up to my neck, pulling me closer to her. Our lips continued their dance, softly brushing one another.
My head was devoid of thought or reason, completely immersed in the moment. I held her slender waist and pulled her closer to me; the warmth of her body heating every inch of my being.
My lips retreated from their position, travelling to her neck, pressing soft kisses from top to bottom, and then working their way along her jaw line.
"So, are you leaving, Byakuya?" She whispered, her voice deep and flirtatious.
My hands played with her hair as my lips returned to her neck, slowly coming up to her ear to whisper.
"The night is young, Rangiku. If the consequences are damned, I see no reason to leave now." I said, my lips pressing onto hers once more.
She grabbed my hands, which were at the time busy tracing the contours of her body, pulling them away from their task. She took a step back, breaking away from my hold.
She looked up at me, a quirked eyebrow complementing her teasing expression. She pulled me by my hands and started leading me through her residence, stopping in front of a door.
She turned to look at me, letting out a short sigh; the both of us were short of breath.
"Last chance for regrets, Byakuya. What do you say?" She said, her hand tender on my cheek.
I noticed a handle on the door that stood behind her, and, freeing one hand away from her hold, I grabbed it to open the door, my answer to her question subtle but clear.
---------------X-------------
Our bodies left no room for air, as we lay on her bed, skin touching skin.
My lips went wild, travelling over the inches of her skin, her breath slowly decelerating after coming down from the high. Our hands run through strands of hair.
I continued to entertain myself with her neck, softly kissing it and inhaling the scent that emanated from the pores. I could feel her shift at the feel of my breath close to her ear.
I was glued to her, and even when our bodies asked for rest, I couldn't help but deny the petition, as involved as I was in the moment, feeling her heart pound almost uncontrollably, although it was slowly settling down.
"Who knew you were so loving, Taicho."
Even as her voice wreaked havoc on my senses, my brain couldn't avoid hearing what she said. I was briefly disillusioned by her choice of title, although soon I understood it was all a game to her, so I followed suit.
"You hurt my feelings, Rangiku." I whispered, so softly I could almost feel the shiver travel up and down her spine.
"I'm sorry, Byakuya. Perhaps you could forgive me?" She answered, her tone rich and husky.
Her lips went searching for mine. Once they met, I felt once more the sweet taste of her lips; her kiss nothing but the sweet gesture of her repentance after the small transgression.
"Perhaps I can forgive you this one time."
Her lips slowly morphed into a smile, although I was quick to stop her response, kissing her once more.
She pulled away, shifting in the bed to lie on her back. My body followed hers, leaning over her as my arms kept my weight off. Her hands played with me, one mussing my hair between her fingers while the other caressed my cheek, wiping the sweat away from it.
She smiled at me, somewhat surprised by my search for contact.
"It seems you have worn me out," she announced, her breath tired from the frenzy, "would you mind terribly giving me a break, Byakuya?" She asked teasingly.
My face remained calm and unexpressive. Regardless of this, I was sure she noticed the disappointment in my eyes after her request.
"I apologize, Rangiku. I suppose we could both use a break now." I said, leaning over her to kiss her lips once more before flopping on her side.
We tried to slow our breathing. She looked up at the ceiling, slowly closing her eyes to calm herself. My eyes wondered, gazing at her body, although they were not accurately focused on her form, as the fog that covered them previously slowly faded.
I could feel her breathing settle down from my position, standing upright on my elbow as I looked at her. She sighed, releasing the exhaustion from her body. Her hand wondered over to my chin, softly moving it so my eyes could meet hers.
"I'm thirsty, Byakuya. I'm getting some water, do you want some?"
"Water? Have I exhausted you to the degree you're no longer hydrated?" I inquired, somewhat witty.
"Yeah, right," she said, brushing my comment, "So? Do you want some or are you really not thirsty at all?" She asked, leaving the bed to search for the desired beverage, making a stop at my lips before she left.
"Some water would be nice, although I thought you would offer sake once again." I replied, contemplating her body as she walked towards the kitchen.
"What?" She asked, surprised by the comment, "Do you want sake, Byakuya? Or is it that you thought I would try to get you drunk."
"I'll take the water, though I wouldn't mind the sake."
"Now you are hurting my feelings, Byakuya. All this talk of sake just to turn me down in the end? That's cruel." She stated, returning to the bed and handing me a glass of water.
"So what's with you and sake, Byakuya?"
"I'm in the mood for it." I answered, sipping from the glass.
"Mood? How come? Is it that being with a woman turns you to sake? Did you and your wife…"
I shyly turned away from her at the mention of Hisana. I wasn't ready to speak of her to Rangiku, and probably wouldn't be for a while, but I didn't want to worry her. She, however, picked up on this, swiftly changing the subject after noting my response.
"Oh, I get it. The Shinigami Academy, right? I mean, there's no way you can drink sake and not be affected by it without having some experience."
I decided to take her lead and follow the conversation, hoping it would take away the bittersweet taste of my wife's memory.
"You are right. There's no escaping sake when you're in The Academy, even if you try your hardest. I can't believe you're surprised by this, seeing as it was Gin who constantly instigated people into drinking."
My reply struck a chord on her, as she was now turning away from me, hoping I didn't notice. I was saddened by her reaction, thinking I should apologize since it seemed my comment was somewhat vengeful.
"I'm sorry, Rangiku, I…"
She gracefully leaned towards me, softly kissing me before pulling away, her thumb playing with my lips.
"You have your ghosts and I have mine. Let's just leave it at that." She whispered.
She moved from the bed, taking the glass from my hand and placing it on top of a table. I, once again, indulged in observation, noticing the form of her naked body as she walked away.
"You've been watching me, Byakuya."
"Yes, I have." I replied, fully aware she was not referring to my recent contemplation.
"What do you want, Byakuya? Why did you come to see me? Was it because of Rukia? Your late wife?" She asked, confusedly.
I once again sighed at the mention of Hisana, although this time the feeling was not as intense as before, considering Rangiku had a calming effect over my troubled mind.
"How do you know about my wife?" I inquired.
"Rukia mentioned her some time ago. You don't…"
"She's not why I'm here. Not her, not Rukia."
"But you still don't know what you want."
"Do you?" I asked from my position in her bed.
"This is not about me, Byakuya." She replied, turning to look at me.
"I beg to differ, Rangiku. This is as much about you as it is about me."
"You're avoiding the question." She said, swerving to avoid my gaze.
I was slightly frustrated by her behavior, as she was in denial of the situation. However, I took the opportunity to clarify to the best of my abilities.
"It is not what you think. I would not debase myself in such way," I announced, noticing the attempt she made to stifle the gasp my comment provoked.
"Rangiku, it was not my intention to…"
"Sleep with me? Of course not. You just wanted to say 'thank you'" She replied sarcastically.
She paced somewhat frantically, vexed by my response. I sat up on the bed, hoping that the new position would aid my thoughts.
"I don't know if this matters to you anymore," I said, trying to calm her down, "but I care."
She quickly turned to meet my stare. "You care?"
"Yes."
She sighed, although this time I could not understand the meaning behind it. She walked towards me, sitting next to me on the edge of her bed.
Her hand ran up my face and pulled some hair behind my ear, getting a clear view of my stoic expression.
"Rangiku, I know this…"
She leaned in to kiss me, a small quirk playing on her lips.
"I don't know either," she stated as she pulled away from me, "but I think that's enough talking for now, Byakuya. I mean, it was you who said the night was young, am I correct?" She said flirtatiously.
"Yes, I did. However, I can't stay for long."
Rangiku pouted, dismay showing in her face.
"Where do you need to be at this hour, Byakuya? It's not like you're needed in the division at the moment."
"I promised Rukia I would return."
A slight frown played upon her face, "I see. How is she?" She asked, slightly concerned.
"She's recovering. You should visit her, I'm sure she would love to talk to you."
"So, you're leaving?" She asked. Her hand played with mine, although I could feel the disappointment in her tone.
I had no certainty as to how she would react, but still I decided to dare and lean in to kiss her.
"I will," I answered, briefly parting from her lips, "but not yet."
---------------X-------------
"Shush, Rangiku! He's going to hear us!"
"So what? After all, doesn't he look cute in that position?"
"Since when do you think my brother's cute?"
"Come on, Rukia. You should know my words are not to be taken seriously."
I yawned, shifting in my seat in search for comfort.
"See? I told you he'd wake up."
The rich sound of laughter woke me from my sleep, sunlight slowly hitting my eyes.
I heard whispers in the room, but having just awakened from my accidental sleep, I couldn't point to the source.
"Good morning, Nii-sama."
I yawned, not yet alert of my surroundings. "Good morning, Rukia." I answered, my eyes still shut.
"Good morning, Kuchiki-taicho."
The sound of her voice woke my senses, now fully aware after stumbling into the sudden surprise.
All I could manage to do was stare. Stare in awe at her presence in my sister's room.
"I'm sorry we woke you, Nii-sama. Rangiku came by to visit and I didn't want to turn her away, but I didn't want to wake you either, so we tried to keep quiet. I'm sorry we were unsuccessful."
"It's okay, Rukia." I answered. "Good morning, Matsumoto-fukutaicho."
I could feel a hint of disappointment coming from her, as I now addressed her by her title. However, I hoped she understood the reasons behind the choice.
The three of us remained quiet for a moment; an awkward silence ensued.
"So, how did things go at the Sotaicho's last night, Nii-sama?"
Somehow, I was able to keep my composure, seeing as the reason for last night's urgency was sitting next to Rukia, quietly mocking me. If the question hadn't disturbed me to such degree, I could have laughed as well.
I spared a moment to consider my answer, noting that Rangiku might be offended by it.
"The meeting was over before it really started. The Taichos got distracted and the Sotaicho was unable to keep them in subject, so he adjourned the session."
"Do you know when the next meeting will be, Kuchiki-taicho?"
Rangiku was teasing me, perhaps in an attempt to keep herself from bursting into laughter. Regardless of this, I realized her intentions went further than the simple joke.
"I'm not sure, Fukutaicho," I answered, following her game, "I believe they might meet before the day ends to discuss the contents of Hitsugaya-taicho's report, but that's not official."
My eyes had drifted away from Rangiku, for the sole purpose of avoiding my sister's suspicions. However, I noticed the look in Rangiku's eyes after hearing my comment.
"Well then, I should go to the office now. The paperwork won't fill itself out." She said, rising from her position in Rukia's bed, "It was nice to see you Rukia. Get some rest. After all, the minute you leave fourth it'll be back to business."
With that she left the room, disregarding the proper farewell. I, however, tried to overlook this.
"You must be tired, Nii-sama. At what hour did you arrive here?" Rukia inquired.
"I don't remember, Rukia. However, I didn't take long." I replied, blatantly lying since I only had about an hour of sleep.
I sat quietly for a moment, thinking of what I should do during the day. I deemed important to spare some time to think, since I've had no chance to do so, and considering everything that happened yesterday, the time was necessary.
However, this was not the moment to become absorbed in thought, as I had many obligations pending.
"I must go now, Rukia. Today will be a long day, so I better start working."
"Maybe you should go home and rest, you've been here all night. You're clearly tired." Rukia suggested.
"I can't. I have a division to care for. Also, tonight there's a clan meeting."
"Will you still attend the meeting, Nii-sama?" Rukia asked, slightly confused, "With everything that's happened lately, I'm sure they would accept your reasons for being absent."
"Rukia, if I don't preside the meeting, who will? You know as well as I do that there's a delicate balance in dealing with the clan. I don't want to create conflict."
Rukia has always found strange the way in which I bend my will for the clan, absently allowing them to make decisions about different subjects on my behalf. Sometimes, decisions concerning my personal life, which upsets her. However, she has become used to this, but every now and then she tries to stop me.
"But, Nii-sama, you can…"
"We won't discuss this further, Rukia. Have you eaten already? If you haven't I'll alert the nurses." I stated sharply, quickly changing the subject.
I could see the disappointment hit Rukia's eyes after my response, realizing I had, once again, allowed the clan to keep control over my life.
"I already ate," she replied bitterly, "so you can go and handle your duties."
Any other day, I wouldn't have allowed Rukia to act so haughty towards me, but there was a part of me that agreed with her reaction, as I suddenly realized she was only looking out for my well being. This has become typical in her since the time Aizen betrayed the Soul Society, but she rarely pressed so hard.
I couldn't help but think I had become a burden for my sister, considering that, whether I ask for it or not, she always worries about me.
Our relationship has derailed from its original context over time. It is me who is supposed to worry about Rukia's well being, not the opposite. That was the duty Hisana left for me before she died, and I couldn't avoid thinking I have failed her.
I needed to see her. Feel her presence even when it is such a faint energy the one I feel when I visit.
"I'll come meet you for lunch, Rukia. Please rest." I said, turning to face the door.
"I'll be expecting you, Nii-sama. Have a nice morning."
I could read the message behind my sister's words. She was hoping I could find some comfort, once again, worrying about me. I opted for silence, as a response would show my sister I was not in the finest of states.
I walked out of Rukia's room, searching for the nearest exit, as I still felt the urge to visit my wife's shrine.
It was while looking around that I noticed someone had been waiting for me to leave my sister's quarters.
"Hello, Byakuya." She announced from her position, slouched against the wall.
"You forgot to say goodbye."
"Well, that is because I knew I would see you soon." She answered teasingly, "I'm sorry if that hurt your feelings, Byakuya."
"Rangiku," I called, pausing briefly to ponder my response, "What are you doing here?"
"That's simple. You owe me a conversation." She replied. I noticed she was serious this time, as her tone was calm but firm.
"I owe you many things, Rangiku. A conversation is one of them. Unfortunately, we can't talk now. I hope you can forgive me." I stated, trying my best to be convincing.
I turned away from her, resuming my search. I hoped my answer would be enough for her to understand the situation. However, I was wrong.
"Why are you running from me, Byakuya?" She asked.
"I am not running. You know I have business to attend to."
"Still, it feels like you're running." She pressed.
"Honestly, I have a report to read and sign off on and a division to care for, amongst other things. I'm sorry if you believe I am running. If that is your opinion, I'm afraid I can't change your mind." I answered, slightly disappointed by her reaction.
"I'd like you to try, Byakuya."
I considered disclosing the truth. However, I couldn't bring myself to do it, as it was too big of a confession to make.
"I have very important business to attend to, Rangiku." I answered, hoping the response would be enough for her.
"Not related to the division, of course."
I sighed, slightly frustrated. "Rangiku, I…"
"Why is it so hard for you to talk to me? You know that what happened doesn't settle things between us." She pointed out.
"Of course it doesn't. You know I don't think it does. There's something I must do before we talk."
I could see the frustration in her eyes, as she realized I would not bend to her wishes so easily.
"Byakuya, if you're expecting to figure out what you want before talking to me, then who knows how long this conversation will be delayed. I mean, what is so important that it keeps you from doing this now?"
"I don't expect you to understand my reasons, Rangiku," I said, trying to calm her down, "You think I'm running, but I can promise you I am not. We will talk soon enough."
"How soon, Byakuya?"
"I hoped you had picked up on the subtlety, but apparently you didn't. Before the end of the day, Rangiku. I want us to talk, but I can't do it now. Please, make an effort to understand." I replied, once again appealing to her reason.
She sighed, a sign that she was giving up on her insistence.
"I'm trusting you on this, Byakuya. If you don't come through…"
"I will. I know what would happen if I don't, and I don't want that. There's no need for threats."
"Very well," she answered, dryly, "I'll be expecting you."
I gave her the slightest of nods. It was my way of showing her the seriousness with which I made my promise. I stood there, watching her walk away.
---------------X-------------
"Hello." I announced, conscious to the fact I would get no response.
I knelt in front of her shrine, gazing at the picture before me.
"I'm sorry I've neglected you, Hisana."
A silence ensued. I couldn't find the words to say.
"I've failed you. In so many ways it hurts to even consider it."
A sigh slipped out of my mouth.
"Rukia almost died yesterday, and if she had, I would be helpless."
I tried to carry on, but the words failed me.
"Some days, I feel I can't keep my promise. And those days, I only want to run away. Those days I wish you would be here, just to reassure me. To say that everything will be okay. Those days, I wish…"
I choked, unable to continue.
"I wish I was not alone. I wish I had not lost you. Those days, I wish the guilt would fade away."
I paused; the silence came over me like heavy clouds covering the sky.
"Some days I feel so weak without you I don't know what to do. And yesterday…"
I bowed my head, hoping for comfort.
"Yesterday, for the first time in ages, I didn't feel so helpless. I know I've failed you, but I don't know if you would regard it as such."
I looked up at the shrine. As I noticed the resemblance, I couldn't help but think of Rukia.
"Rukia is always worrying about me, and I know this is not what you wanted me to provide for her. I know you didn't wish for me to become a burden to her, but some days, like yesterday, I think all that you wanted was for her to not be alone."
I took a breath, briefly pausing after the realization.
"I understand now. I understand the meaning behind the promise. You didn't want us to be alone. You wanted me to find her because you knew she would worry. Because you knew she would care for me as I do for her. I know I am not the best of brothers, and for that, I'm forever sorry, but I think you wouldn't loathe me because of it."
I closed my eyes and felt the energy. That faint energy she left with me after passing.
"You only had love for me, and that was always enough for me. Even in your death, you managed to think of me."
I held her picture in my hands, a soft smile slipping through the mask.
"Thank you, Hisana. Thank you for giving me a sister. Your sister. I know now that you want my happiness. Knowing that, I think you would want me to find it. Just like Rukia has implied so many times."
I had suddenly found peace; the peace that avoided me for such a long time.
"I don't know if my happiness lies with her. She's so different from you, and yet she sees me, in the same way that you did, as a man. Not a Taicho or a noble, just a man. It's so easy to flaunt those titles and separate from the rest of the world, but she sees through all of it."
I sighed, noticing my mind was no longer focused on the memory of my wife.
"I think you would like her, Hisana. You would have much in common."
A smile played upon my lips. It was one that only Hisana had borne witness to. She always said that it was her favorite reaction from me, since it was always unexpected. That smile had always been prompted by my wife, but now that was not the case.
I sighed once more, realizing I had fulfilled the purpose of my visit. I placed her picture on the shrine once more, standing from my position on the floor.
I walked towards the door, noticing that I had one thing left to say.
"I'm sad that it took me so long to realize how much you loved me. Thank you for the wisdom. I expected no less from you, my dear Hisana."
---------------X-------------
About time you did, you dummy Byakushi!! Aww, I just wanted to hug him... Ok, no more fangirling on my part, although I think this conversation between him and Hisana is my favorite scene so far. What's yours?
Now, onto the news. I might be taking a hiatus from posting next week. Why, you ask? Well, so happens that writer's block is an actual disease, but no one throws any fund raisers or does telethons to fight it, so those who become ill have no choice but to ride it out. I'm hoping/crossing fingers/praying to Kubo-sama that the brat I have for muse returns and feeds me chapter 16, but she's very temperamental, so I don't know :/ Anyways, this chapter was, if I'm not mistaken, the longest I've posted to date, so hopefully it'll be enough of a fix. If not then, I'm soooo sorry, but the brat (aka. muse) has a life of her own.
By the way, I'm calling off the contest for this week. It'll be back on chapter 16, but I'm taking a break this week. I'm focusing my writing energies on getting ch 16. That comes before the rest.
As always, leave your comments, suggestions, fangirl squeals and your "this gave me a nosebleed is so good" kind of remarks, if you have any of course. I love them all, and they might just help my muse.
I hope you've had a nice week and will have a great next week. Let's all cross our fingers for my muse, and then she might allow me to post next Friday as usual. Bye bye, my friends.