Disclaimer: Standard disclaimer applies.
Warning: Attempted Crack, Slight AU in Allen's history (nothing major)
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"Wait, brother-in-law?" Lavi glanced at the two Noah members, inwardly wondering how in the world those two are related. He then opened his mouth to question the two, but immediately stopped when he saw Tyki and Neah smiling at each other with 'Make-one-move-towards-Allen-and-I'll-maim-you' aura. It was definitely life-threatening to say the least, especially with an eerie aura around the duo.
"Mana, Allen's adopted father, was my older brother," Neah explained with a smile still plastered on his expression, and continued with a scowl towards the Noah of Pleasure, "Our sister was married to Tyki…" His sentence trailed off with a faraway gaze and a frown replacing his earlier displeased expression.
Tyki ran his hand through his hair, and let out a depressed sigh, "The Earl killed her before my eyes when he found out that I was Joyd, saying that she will only be hindrance. I tried to stop him… I really did, but…"
"There was nothing you could've done," Neah stated with a defeated sigh. He then gave a teasing grin towards the other Noah, as if to hide his gloomy expression, and asked, "Was what happened with Nikki the reason why you swing that way?"
"…Maybe…" the Noah of Pleasure responded with shifty eyes as he refused to look at the 14th.
As if in timed union, both Neah and Crown Clown stood in front of Allen as if to protect the younger boy from something. "Well then, you can't come five meters before our dear/darling Allen," the two declared whilst hugging the said exorcist, and shooting death glares to Tyki.
"Huh! Why? He's my nephew too!" the third disciple of Noah family responded in a baffled tone, and then questioned in the same tone, "And why five meters? That's just too much!"
"Because I said so! We don't want our Allen-chan to be swinging that way," Neah responded childishly with his tongue stuck out, making his nephew sweat drop in response.
Both Lavi and Allen did not know what to say to that kind of statement, and instead decided to let out a defeated sigh. The conversation was getting weirder by the second, and they were not even a part of it.
"So..." Allen trailed off, interrupting the childish banter as he resisted the urge to massage his temple (not that he could do that action since Neah and Crown Clown were hugging him as if he was a teddy bear, and he is not a teddy bear, dammit). "How are we going to dominate Black Order? Last time I tried to do that, Komui came at me with his drill..."
Lavi chuckled in amusement at that memory, and stated whilst laughing, "I remember that. It was hilarious... heh heh... sorry, Moyashi-chan."
"It's Allen," the silvery white haired exorcist immediately corrected with a scowl planted on his expression.
"Why don't we start with something smaller?" Tyki suggested with an amused smirk on his expression. His hand was still holding Lavi's, and it did not seem like he had any intention to let go anytime soon either.
Allen's attention shifted to the Noah of Pleasure, looking at him as if he made a godly suggestion, and instantaneously responded with, "What do you have in mind? Originally, it was the world, but I figured it'd be too much so I narrowed it down to Black Order. Now you want to make it smaller?"
Tyki eyed at the silvery white haired exorcist as if he was trying gauge something, and replied, "What do you like?"
"Food," Lavi answered in Allen's stead, and added, "So... the kitchen?"
The silvery white haired exorcist shot a deathly glare at the redhead exorcist for interrupting. It was his world domination idea, and how dare Lavi interrupt his master plan. He then shifted his gaze towards Tyki, and let out a sadistic smirk when he noticed that their hands still conjoined.
"How are we going to do that?" Crown Clown asked with an eyebrow raised, "It's not like we can ask Jerry to cooperate with us, and even if he does, it won't be dominating. It'd be negotiating."
"I've been meaning to ask... who are you?" Tyki interjected as he looked at the Innocence with a puzzle expression. Well... as puzzled as he could manage to look without being obvious.
Crown Clown let out a wry grin and answered, "I'm Allen-chan's awesome Innocence, Crown Clown."
"...Innocence have human forms?" the Noah of Pleasure asked with eyes widen in surprised.
The long silvery white haired Innocence merely let out a bigger grin at the question, and answered, "Well, only me thus far; that's just because I'm awesome."
"Isn't that because of my powers, dear Crown Clown?" Neah added with a twitch, and continued as an afterthought, "And don't go stealing my catchphrase!"
"Well, that too," the Innocence sighed dramatically as he shoo-ed away Neah's last statement without a care.