A/N: omg so many long reviews !! You guys rock so hard !!
Ok let's see.. I can't think of much to say this time around. It may be cuz I'm so gosh-darn sleepy right now. I mean, my comments are more or less going to be the same as usual: "I think this chapter sucks blah blahhh" but yeah... Maybe I should stop apologizing since if there are ever parts that are slightly OOC, you guys seem to eat it up anyway :P
I wanna shove some credit over to kitten chan who so kindly helped me write a little bit of this chapter by shooting me ideas and concepts to add in. Thanks hun!
Hummm...which reminds me, I'm still open for suggestions that the readers may have. As I've stated in earlier chapters, I will look over and consider all. You are my readers, and I want to hear what you want to read!
Warnings: language, me writing situations I have no idea how to write about, IkkiKazu chapter favoratism, emo Ringo, pervy Sano, angsty Kazu, assertive Ikki, me missing some sort of grammar issue no matter what I do, possible slight OOC from me writing most of this while I was super tired, and when I should have been doing homework. (like right now)
FaS current stats: Well.. everyone seemed to like emo Kazu in the last chapter. I find this funny. I'm just sayin'... I've also had a lot of people tell me that this story has converted a number of people into Ikki x Kazu fans. Hahah how fantastic is that !? FaS's last chapter had the second to highest number of reviews, a grand total of 19874 hits, 64 favorites and 65 alerts! XD oh and 3 C2's... which I didn't even know about haha!
Thank you guys so much for all the long, wonderful, encouraging reviews!
ALt6913: hun you don't have to worry about good or bad reviews. The fact that you took the time to hit the review button already says enough! Thank you so much for the review and the offer!
rei yamata: Thank you! The situation gave me a hard time, honestly, but I feel much better about it now !
Slifer: Air Gear cosplayerssssss x.x make me more happy than whats healthy. I hope you had an amazing time while you were there ! Oh the scene between Ikki and Kazu was hard to make believable and fanservicy but I'm glad you feel it was pulled off !
RoxasIsReal13: Yussss I live to satisfy! Sorry about the cliffy, there's just something about them that I like. Must be the way my readers squirm XD
Blizzaris: (glomp) since day one, your reviews have always made me smile! THANK YOU for grasping that Kazu is not some weakling and lol, yeah, I can't have Ikki just fall straight in love with Kazu, even if they are gay for each other... even if I wish he would already.
Puddles-dono: dear god your name is adorable... Anyway, uhm, WOW. Just.. wow.. one sitting? That's impressive. You're impressive. I'm so glad you told me that - it makes me feel so good about FaS !
BlackFlameRose: Yeah x.x... I've noticed that too (majority of Ikkazu on ffnet being mine...) but maybe people will catch on and write some! Yusyus your review was quite scattered, lol but I managed to get everything. Thanks so much for your review - it was full of love!
bempi-chan: oh my gosh!! You skipped school to read it!? Thats sooo soo bad XD and so cool! Talk about flattery! Ahaha and of course I don't mind! Who am I to tell you what to do?
AnonyMouse: hurrhurr, I do love detail... And I'm very picky about the words I use (scuttle, teehee) Try not to worry too much about Kazu running off like that (tsk tsk) cuz this chapter should) hopefully make up for it.
Jenova-chan: To be honest, its hard for me to read into drama sometimes too, so I tried to write it in a way that I would want to read it. I see it worked - success ! You're not sadist for wanting that - TRUST me, most if not all readers are the same way. Don't worry, that time will come eventually ;D
Dark-Princess-Hikari: fanart, to fanfic, to series, huh? Well thats quite an accomplishment! Thanks so much for your kind words, I'll be sure to keep it up so you don't lose interest haha! Enjoy the series, and be sure to check out the manga as well!
Peachie-Bunni: lol that time will come sooner or later (I'm actually getting kinda impatient myself...) and we all have yaoi needs so it's totally understandable. It really depends on the thickness of Ikki's skull though...
melchan13: lol you are too cute. I don't think its a matter of Ikki liking emo boys as it is him liking blondes.. Or just Kazu. Yeah... I think that's it right there.
The Crimson Wings: Thank you! I'll be sure to try my best !
DevaGlenn: Well thanks for taking the time to review I always appreciate it! Glad you liked the chapter !
Ikichi: Addicted. Hurmmm I like that word. Yus!! Another IkkiKazu fan - thats great! It needs soooo much more attention. It's such an obvious pairing in my mind; I'm glad I could play a part in influencing you!
iKat.13: I want them to kiss about as much as you do. But watching the relationship bloom and blossom is just as good, yus?
noodle-of-doom: Thanks and I agree! There needs to be moar !
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Air Gear
a fiction by Crimson Vixen
Tell It Like It Is
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This was it. Today was the day she was going to confess. She'd had enough just sitting on the sidelines and it was time to follow her own advice. She could remember how excited Emiri was when she spoke of her kiss to Kazu's cheek, and how she thanked her and Yayoi over and over for giving her advice and courage. Ringo always liked to believe that she was courageous like that, but so far had done nothing to prove such bravery.
Tell him before it's too late. Don't let an opportunity pass you by that you might regret. You'll never know how someone feels until you bring it up.
Yeah, all of that sounded pretty logical. No wonder Emiri felt so empowered. So it was time to add bite to the bark. Though however brave she felt at the moment, no matter how much nerve she gathered in her thought process, the more that time went by, the more that buoyancy started to deteriorate. She was sure that with the rate it was plummeting, she would be hiding under her covers when Ikki finally walked through that front door.
Of course, since it was the night she chose to voice her feelings, it seemed that everyone passed her by except for the one she was waiting for. Mikan had dropped into the kitchen to fix up some quick ramen, sparing Ringo a questioning glance before leaving with noodles in her mouth. She was pretty sure the other girl knew what was up. Ume strolled on by, humming an ethereal tune with a smile on her face and a doll in her hand, pins and needles sticking into its fabric flesh. Rika dropped in and out all night long, tidying the place up and complaining about how she was considering making Ikki do even more chores around the house because he was a lazy slob or… something like that. Of course Ringo was sure Rika would never go through with the threat, especially now that Ikki seemed to be under so much stress. Rika was tough, but not heartless.
After all the hustle and bustle, Ringo finally allowed herself to sit down and relax a little now that the kitchen was empty. Surely Ikki would wander in there first when he returned home, to fill his stomach, unless he went out to eat somewhere else beforehand. Ringo puffed her cheeks and released an agonizingly slow sigh, crossing her arms and leaning back in her chair. It was so quiet, she almost started to nod off, until the sound of the front door opening and closing grabbed her attention. Her eyes blinked wide, relieved he had finally returned but suddenly panicking for the very same reason.
What would she say? What would she do? She gave this moment a lot of thought and played out ending scenarios in her head, but she had neglected to consider how to handle the actual situation. Or the possibility that Ikki was already interested in someone else. Although she was sure there were hundreds of girls that had their eye on the crow, her mind jumped to only one other person as true opposition and felt her skin grow hot. Clenching her fists, she forced her voice to steady itself.
"Ikki?"
Ikki made a sound to prove that yeah, he was home, but said nothing. Ringo could hear his feet padding up the stairs and then the sound of a door shutting. Great, he locked himself in his room. Part of her was frustrated; building up all her nerves for nothing, but for the most part she was relieved. Her pretty eyes glanced to the right to look outside the kitchen window, expecting to see the darkening sky and retiring, but instead she saw it was murky with storm clouds, and it was starting to rain. The small droplets started hitting the window, filling the room with a light, comforting tapping sound.
At any rate, she had a few more minutes to prep herself.
But a few minutes turned into an hour, and Ikki hadn't come back down yet. Which was bad, since even after all of her swelling preparation, she was starting to second guess herself.
"Ikki!" she shouted, mainly to herself, lightly slamming a fist onto the table.
After a moment, she could hear the sounds from upstairs, and Ikki appeared in the kitchen, eyes dull and tired looking, like he hadn't had good sleep in days. The crow's gaze set on her and with a swift shift in mood he offered a goofy smile. Ringo smiled back, trying to make this as painless as she could. She hadn't thought about the mood that Ikki would be in when she did this. Come to think of it, there were several factors she hadn't contemplated.
No, she mentally scolded herself. She wasn't going to make excuses – she was going to tell him and he was going to listen to her. She didn't know where this would lead them. Would there be tension between the two of them after this? Or a blossoming relationship? A broken friendship? How would that work living under one roof? Maybe if this didn't go over well, they could continue their lives pretending it never happened? She didn't know, and the possible answers scared her, but she'd made up her mind (right?) and she was alone with Ikki. The boy was just staring at her, waiting for her to do something.
Granted, they were in the kitchen; not the most romantic of places but at least there would be no interruptions.
Ringo swallowed roughly, knees locking when she tried to stand up.
"Ikki I need to talk to you."
He looked at her apprehensively, preparing himself for even more bad news to lug around. Right away Ringo was giving him wrong impressions and she had to rethink her approach. She rounded the table to put a hand to his arm. Ikki looked at her hand, then to her, eyes as clueless as they've always been, and Ringo found a strange discomfort in this.
"I don't think there's really an easy way to go about this," she thought aloud, causing Ikki's brows to furrow and his eyes to narrow suspiciously. "So I guess I'll just come right out with it. Ikki, I…"
But she stopped herself, unsure if she could really go through with such a thing. Momentarily, she thought of Emiri and her story, however pithy and quick it was, and the phrase 'actions speak louder than words' really made a lot more sense then it did before.
For the sake of being original, she did not go for his cheek, and she did not make it snappy, and she most certainly didn't run away afterwards. When she leaned forward, inching the boy backwards until his back hit the sink counter, she made sure her lips landed directly on his.
Surely even someone as dense as Ikki could figure this one out.
Just a soft mashing of their lips and she pulled away with her heart hammering her ribcage, demanding to be let go before it had the chance to be rejected and broken.
When she took a step back, she forced herself to look directly into Ikki's eyes, wide and unblinking. Ikki's hands fumbled on the counter's edge before seizing it, expression questioning the girl's actions as if asking if she meant to do what she did, but things like kisses were hardly accidental.
"You don't have to say anything, Ikki," Ringo said once the silent became too much. Or maybe she just feared the reaction in the end. She centered her hearing on the rain splattering against the window, so she wouldn't have to suffer in the stillness of the room.
She hadn't known what to expect, but this wasn't how it was supposed to happen. Loud, resolute, cocky Ikki was supposed to say something – anything – but his lips weren't even moving. She couldn't even tell if his face was disgusted or shocked. In fact, she could no longer bring herself to look at that face. He was being too quiet for too long, and she was sure she had just destroyed whatever chance she may have had with the crow, so she stared back out the window, at the gloomy clouds. How ironically befitting.
"It's getting pretty bad," she said softly, desperate for words to be spoken, even if it was about the increasingly heavy rain.
Ikki finally remembered how to blink then, craning his neck to look out the window with Ringo, a little surprised that it had gotten so ominous in such a short time. He heard the low rumble of thunder and then the quick flash of lightning. He stared at it for a while, mind trying to think but not being able to, needing the excuse to look away from Ringo, who had randomly decided that it was a good idea to...
That's when it suddenly hit him. He snapped his head to the girl so fast that she jumped.
"How long has it been raining?"
"What? I don't know…" Ringo uttered, a little peeved that the crow seemed to be avoiding the subject altogether. "A half an hour? Maybe longer."
"Anyone come here since I've been back?"
Ringo's gut twisted into something worth gagging over, but she compelled it to settle.
"No."
"Shit," Ikki mumbled under his breath. "Idiot."
Ringo pressed her lips together in restlessness. It was almost like Ikki was ignoring her completely. As much as she felt for the boy, she hated him for it. Boys were so damn insensitive sometimes and Ikki was a prime example of it. They may not do it on purpose, but it seemed to be common among the male sex.
Ikki was like most boys; immature, egotistical, stupid, hungry and eccentric. He had a lot of energy but was lazy at the same time. He liked to roughhouse and be the best at everything, had a competitive edge and a swaggering smirk to go along with it, he was horny and curious and he liked pretty girls. Along with liking pretty girls, he wanted to touch them and explore them and be adored by them. So why was he acting so strange when she showed affection? Was it too weird for him? Was she too direct?
No… Ikki liked direct. Maybe she wasn't the kind of pretty that he went for. But while her mind scrambled around the issue, Ikki's mind seemed to be elsewhere.
"That idiot!" Ikki bellowed again, racing for the front door and flinging it open. It was raining even harder than he'd thought, and a bolt of lightning fleetingly lit up the sky in a warning. "I'm sorry, Ringo. Another night."
And he ran out the door and into pouring rain, sucking in a breath through his teeth when he felt how freezing it was. The wind was picking up, throwing his thick bangs around and slapping the already wet strands against his forehead. The remorse was already starting to swarm in his chest for leaving Ringo behind so quickly with so many queries about what had just transpired. He was no idiot – he knew it was a matter that needed to be handled, but the timing was all wrong. There were other things that needed to be taken care of at the moment.
He may have been over-reacting, somehow, but he kept running, ignoring the way the bottom of his jeans were starting to soak and how heavy his jacket was starting to feel. He kept apologizing in his head – sorry Ringo sorry Ringo sorry Ringo – like a mantra to the rhythm he found with his feet when they hit the ground. He wriggled his lips a little, remembering the touch of Ringo's lips on his, before he brought his attention back to where he was.
He ceased his running once he reached the place he'd last seen Kazu.
This was all quite crazy, really; running out in the rain like a nutcase in search of something that might not even be an issue. Still, Ikki thought back to earlier that day and recalled the place he'd caught him (he'd caught him here, right here) and the spot on the wall that caused the fall (there, his feet slipped right there), and the direction that Kazu had run, (that way) and he went in that direction. It was only a few blocks later that he came to the park, abandoned and almost invisible in the hazy curtain the rain had created. Ikki had to squint to make out the figure sitting alone on the bench but recognized it almost immediately.
The boy looked drenched, soaked right down to the bone. His clothes clung to his skin, revealing just how painfully thin he really was. Pale skin glistened in the rain, hat heavy with moisture and hair plastered to his face, shadowing his eyes so Ikki couldn't really see them. Maybe Kazu didn't want him to. All he could see was the other boy's shivering body, his rapidly bouncing legs and twitching fingers, chattering teeth and rain dripping heavily from his thick lashes and blue lips, which were twisted into some unnatural and insane looking smile.
"Kazu," Ikki somehow kept his voice from shaking in... whatever it was he was feeling. He didn't really have anything to say – what could he say? – it was more like a confirmation, like he had to say his name to make sure he was really all there. Ikki wanted to reach out and touch the other boy just see if what he was seeing was indeed real, but he couldn't help feeling like the blonde would disappear if he did.
The sight of his childhood friend looking so broken chilled him. It was like a silent cry for help that Kazu would push away as soon as it was offered. The crow put a hesitant hand on Kazu's head, sliding off the white beanie to reveal his mussed hair.
The blonde barely seemed to notice it, but after a minute he slowly looked up at Ikki, stiff and sluggish like it was hard to do, and he finally saw Kazu's eyes, blank and vacant as they were blue. His clanking teeth grew loud and Kazu, finally conscious of this, sealed his lips to hide it and hugged himself to keep warm. How embarrassing; for Ikki to see him like this – shameful.
Ikki sat down, not only to get the other teen to move, but because his own legs were going numb.
"Kazu," he said again. It was the only thing that his lips seemed to be able to form at the moment. Then Kazu blinked heavily at him; Ikki spotted the deep circles under those baby blue depths, the sickly color of his skin, the slack of his jaw as though he didn't have the energy to keep it shut. Ikki bit his lip.
"Let's... get you out of here, man," he suggested, hoping it would be as simple as he pictured it in his head. All of the nasty things he wanted to say could wait until later. Everything that was starting to grate his nerves about Kazu's increasingly outlandish conduct. He got an offended look instead, and Kazu snatched back his hat and forcefully pulled the soggy material over his head, far enough to cover his brows and cast a shadow just over his eyes. He stood.
"Believe it or not, I can take care of myself," he blurted.
Ikki's eyes narrowed. I never said you couldn't crossed his mind but instead...
"Yeah, I can see that," he grumbled loudly, equally defensive. "We're friends, and friends are supposed to watch each others backs."
"No, stop trying to play hero," Kazu seethed, holding out a hand to stop him. Looking into his eyes, Ikki could actually see the blonde's thoughts shift. "Everyone thinks you're so amazing. And I'm – !"
Kazu choked on his words, not meaning to say things out loud that hurt to hear.
Ikki had to bite his tongue as he watched Kazu churn. That's right. Always concerend about what everyone else thinks...
"I don't need a hero!" He shouted, turning on his heel, fists balled. "And dammit, I don't need you!"
Ikki swallowed. What the hell?
He immediately picked up at how Kazu's whole body posture changed and tensed, how his weight shifted slightly. Kazu was going to bolt... He could sense it. He could feel it. But Ikki refused to let that happen. Not again.
Quickly Ikki flung himself forward, falling nastily to the ground with the hasty impetus and grabbing at whatever he could, managing to latch onto Kazu's pant leg just as the boy was taking off, and the blonde plummeted to the ground, hands scraping against the concrete, jeans tugged an inch or two lower on his waist and face splashing unceremoniously in a puddle.
To Ikki's surprise, Kazu didn't struggle, he didn't move or curse, he hardly breathed. He didn't even make an effort to pull his mouth and nose all the way out of the puddle, his submerged eye closed lightly and the other half lidded.
Growling, Ikki grabbed his friend by the shoulder and rolled him onto his back, cursing the rain but mostly him. Kazu's mouth parted slightly, eyes fluttering into slits of dazed wonder, as if water falling from the sky was an amazing new discovery. As if he just didn't care anymore. The crow grumbled incoherently under his breath, sliding off his glove and resting his hand onto the blonde's forehead.
Just when the hell did things get so fucking intricate between them?
"Shit..." he spat, gliding his hand across Kazu's burning temple and down his flushed cheek before replacing his glove. Carefully he slid his arms under Kazu's and lifted the other boy up onto his feet. He was like dead weight at first, then it slowly started to register to the blonde what was happening. Ikki took a hold of the jet's arm and swung it over his shoulder for support, and Kazu started walking alongside him, seemingly to have already forgotten their small quarrel. If he didn't know any better, he'd say that Kazu expected to be left out there.
Ikki put his free hand around Kazu's petite waist to keep him balanced and started their long trudge home, pissed off he didn't think to grab an umbrella. Pissed off he left Ringo alone and angry and more than likely hurt and confused. Pissed off about everything that had been going so horribly wrong lately and how some of it was Kazu's damn fault.
Thankfully, Kazu kept his mouth shut and kept a steady pace with the crow as they trudged back home. Ikki mentally counted down the blocks as they passed them, unable to explain how relieved he felt when he finally set eyes on his house. When he got to the front door, he turned the knob and gently kicked the door in with his foot. Kazu stumbled a little with the first step inside, and Ikki quickly tightened his hold him, heaving him up the stairs and into his room.
He was sure Ringo was still around somewhere, and he intended to find her just as soon as this was taken care of.
He dumped Kazu on the bed, mindful of the jet's stipulation and not finding the energy to particularly care that it would get the sheets wet. Kazu slowly rolled his head around in the pillow, body adjusting to the warmth and comfort now enveloping his body. He let his eyes close and waited for sleep, but Ikki had other plans.
He swiped Kazu's hat up and threw it to the floor. Ignoring Kazu's now wide and questioning eyes, he then yanked off the boy's shoes and socks as well.
"What…" his cracked voice faded away softly, but suddenly Ikki had grabbed him by the front of his hooded sweatshirt and pulled him into a sitting position. Then he took a hold of the fabric at the bottom of his shirt and jerked it up and over the blonde's head. Kazu gritted his teeth and made a shuddering sound as he was stripped down to his undershirt.
"I think I've been pretty lenient," Ikki grumbled loudly, getting a good handful of Kazu's pants and giving a giant pull down, and Kazu instinctively recoiled, pulling his legs in and scurrying back on the bed, trying to pull up his soggy jeans.
"I've been letting a lot of things slide." The crow kept saying, catching Kazu's ankle and pulling him close again so he could regrip the boy's pants and get them all the way down. Kazu wasn't making it very easy though. For being so heavy and flaccid moments earlier, his limbs were flailing quite gallingly.
"I even kept my mouth shut about some things."
He kept tearing at the blonde's skin and clothes, rough but careful all the same so as not to agitate whatever sickness Kazu had picked up, and in turn, Kazu kept twisting away, too confused and somewhat alarmed with Ikki's aggressive actions.
"But lately," he snarled. "Kazu."
He captured the damp denim of Kazu's jeans once more.
"You're really,"
Tug.
"Really,"
Pull.
"…starting to piss me off."
Riiip!
Kazu gasped when Ikki finally hauled his jeans all the way off, – Kazu stopped struggling when he heard the fabric stretch and tear – stripping him down to just his damp boxers and undershirt. He tried to say Ikki's name, but those dark eyes were so fierce and so irate, and he was so cold and so soggy that he couldn't really focus on anything other than his own exposure. He flung his arms around and over himself, trying to block himself from Ikki's eyes.
The crow reached forward and took a firm hold of Kazu's undershirt and tugged that off with little effort. Now the only things remaining were Kazu's boxers and a select few bandages. Kazu had apparently been sloppily changing some of them himself.
"Ik…Ikki!" Kazu was finally able to exclaim, sounding a tad stuffy and extremely mortified as he clutched the side of his head with one hand. Then when he felt the cool air against his bare wet skin, he did his best to hide the parts of him that the bandages didn't conceal; hugged his body, lifted the sheets up to serve as a shield; whatever he had to do to keep Ikki's eyes away from all the horrific, embarrassing marks that plagued his body. Perhaps they were not as bad as he was thinking them to be, but they were still visible, and he couldn't stand to have people like Ikki bear witness to them. "Ikki."
"If you fall asleep in wet clothes, you'll get sick," Ikki said, digging through Kazu's things, still in the suitcase and up against the wall, and grabbing a long sleeved black shirt. He threw it at Kazu; it landed comically on the blonde's head. "I understand if you need some time to think. And I want to say that I don't give a rats ass if you give up on AT, or if you want to keep secrets from me or even if you go out and got into a fight or whatever, but shit, man, don't be stupid."
Kazu didn't have time to sit and figure out the double meaning in Ikki's words, if there even were any or if he was over thinking things, because apparently the crow wasn't content with just tossing him a shirt – no, he had to see it put on. Hesitantly, Kazu dressed himself, well aware of Ikki's eyes on him and it only made him dress faster. When he pulled his head through the proper hole, Ikki flung some more clothes at him – a fresh pair of boxers, sweatpants and socks.
"Get dressed," Ikki said. "I'll be back in a little bit."
As he prepared to leave the room, Kazu told him to wait and then said his name again, and this time, Ikki found himself stopping at the sound of it. He slowly turned back around. Kazu was already standing, pulling on the fresh articles of clothing and closing the distance between them. He stood close, but not too close, very much aware of the shortness of Ikki's fuse. Still, he had to know.
"Did you really mean that?" Kazu pressed.
Ikki stared.
"Huh? Mean what?"
Kazu paused, fingers fidgeting.
"If I ever gave up on AT, would you really…"
Oh.
Ikki had to battle the mean words that wanted to rush out of his mouth. Out of all the things he'd said, it seemed almost natural that Kazu would focus on a single thing - that one in particular - and the crow nearly felt stupid for not expecting it.
Kazu hugged his arms as if he was cold, visibly regretting bringing it up at all, and he shook his head to clear it.
"I'm just being stupid," he said nervously. "Forget I said anything."
And as if that was all there was to it, as if he could just ignore it altogether, Kazu pushed it into the back of his mind and tried to walk past Ikki, but the crow would have none of it. He was tired of… everything. So when Kazu tried to get through, Ikki jabbed his palm into the blonde's chest sharply, shoving him back. Ikki didn't miss the way Kazu swayed on his feet when he staggered back.
"What the hell is your problem!?" Kazu barked, voice stern but soft. When he stubbornly tried to get by again, Ikki didn't push him. If he did, the jet might just fall flat on his ass. No, instead Ikki put his hands to the blonde's shoulders and backed him up until he fell onto the bed. Ikki placed the breadth of his palm over Kazu's face to both check his temperature and shut the kid up before he could even think of speaking.
"If you honestly believe that I'd overlook something like you giving up AT, I'm not giving your stupidity nearly enough credit," Ikki mumbled hotly, removing his hand to let the boy breathe before continuing on an afterthought. "You're not thinking about it, are you?"
"No!" Kazu exclaimed quickly, regretting it the second his head started to pound with the sound of his own voice. He forgot everything in a moment and gripped at his head. When the pang in his temples dimmed, he looked up at Ikki with a bothered glower. "You're the one that said it."
"I swear, you either think too much, or don't think at all."
"Shut up."
God, Ikki really didn't have the patience he needed for this. With an exasperated sigh, the crow sat on the bed, rubbing at his eyes. He needed to get into dry clothes himself soon or he'd just be contradicting himself. He had a pretty good immune system; never really got sick much, but wet clothes were still uncomfortable.
"When did you get so damn difficult?"
"Excuse me?" Kazu retorted, finally succumbing to the hex of fever. He gently shimmied up the bed to rest his head on the pillow. Speaking back in a loud voice was no longer appealing.
"You heard me," Ikki said. All the blonde had been doing lately is getting under his skin and rising suspicion. So even if the guy wasn't at the top of his game, Ikki was done playing mister nice guy. Kazu liked it when people were direct, didn't he? "We never used to be like this."
He waited for the snappy reply, or that smack to the arm. Kazu didn't even get defensive on the matter; he slowly forced himself back into a sitting position, smiling fondly at his hands as they timidly fiddled.
"Yeah," he said. "I know."
Sometimes, past Kazu's obdurate and self-doubting persona, Ikki forgot just how perceptive he could be.
"So what happened?"
"I'm… not sure," the blonde admitted with a light shrug. Then after a moment, he nudged Ikki with his elbow. "I'm sorry."
And just like that, Ikki couldn't bring himself to keep being mad at him, no matter how many reasons he had. There were still things to discuss, mysteries to solve, and as much as he could take advantage of current circumstances, he took another glance at Kazu's fever-flushed cheeks and decided that tomorrow was another day. Words and possibly fists were bound to fly, and Ikki preferred to have Kazu swing at him in full health.
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"Ringo."
She jumped when she heard her name, heart thumping fiercely. Turning around, she saw Ikki standing in her doorway, leaning his weight against the frame and arms crossed tightly over his chest, squaring his shoulders. His lips were jutted outwards, probably chewing at the insides of his mouth in thought or nervousness. Whether he was preparing to reject or accept her and her feelings, it was anxious work.
Ikki, as prompt as he liked to get things over with, spoke brusquely. There was a chance, he knew, that he was carrying frustrations with Kazu's predicament over to Ringo's situation. However, with things going so wrong lately, he couldn't help wanting to get as many things out of the way as he could in the shortest amount of time possible, no matter how ugly it got.
And that very logic sent waves of guilt through his system, so he silently apologized before speaking.
"I… don't know what you want from me," he winced when he saw the hurt look in Ringo's face already. Strangers were easy to hurt, but people you knew well – people like Ringo – were hard to look in the eyes when you told them something that might bring tears to their eyes. Ikki knew this all too well, more so now than ever. Still, he forced himself to move on. He started, so he would finish. "Listen, I will always care about you."
There was a gurgling in his stomach; he never enjoyed sounding so sentimental to other people. Girls were creatures that needed to hear those words, though, or else they would never feel satisfied.
He closed the distance between them and put his hand over Ringo's, making sure she was looking at him when he spoke. Girls did that, too. They bore into your eyes as if they were searching inside your soul; a rather uncomfortable feeling, really. Yet Ikki let her do so, and he returned the gaze. The girl blushed when their fingers touched, and Ikki rushed his next words out before she could misinterpret his intent.
"But Ringo, not like that."
It stung to even say it, let alone see the way it stung her. Ikki couldn't say he knew exactly what it felt like to be on the receiving end of a refutation, but he could imagine what it might feel like; a smack to one's self-worth, a few steps down the ladder of confidence. He could see the way Ringo was gnawing at her lower lip and the way her eyes glistened to looked down to the floor.
He managed to refrain himself from saying the ever popular "You're like a sister to me." For however much that portrayed his feelings towards her, he knew that a line like that would only damage her further. There was probably a full list of lines or excuses or things he could say to her at the moment, but saying more than he had to didn't seem like a very good idea right now. He hated it when girls cried. He never knew what to do or how to handle it. Most boys didn't know, and that was why they usually didn't say anything at all.
Of course Ikki was one of those boys who truly believed that actions could climb mountains while words rounded anthills, and he circled his arms around her to hold her in a meaningful embrace. She froze at first but then hugged him back, resting her head on his shoulder as she did so.
When they pulled away from each other, Ringo was smiling sadly, relieved that she would always have him in her life but coping all the same that it would never be more than what it already was. She knew it would take some time to fully sink in, and perhaps she would never stop loving him and she was meant to long after something she couldn't have, but on another, more hopeful outcome, there was always a chance that Ikki's feelings would change.
"Just tell me one thing," she nearly pleaded, grasping Ikki's shoulders and returning her velvet gaze into his sharp one. "Is there someone else?"
Ikki looked at her awkwardly. He supposed it was only natural for a girl in Ringo's position to assume such things. Ikki easily shrugged.
"No."
Ringo released a sigh and her features softened gradually, finally letting her arms fall back to her sides. God this hurt. It hurt so bad. But she kept her emotions in check the best she could, staring into Ikki's face, which she expected to be apologetic and solemn but instead appeared cold and callous. It was surprising and… scary.
Even more surprising was the way Ikki stood and turned to leave. Ringo watched his retreating back, wanting to reach out and stop him but knowing she would have nothing to say if she did. She kept staring, even as Ikki turned into the hall and out of sight. She eyed the floor, vision going misty with the frustration she tried to suppress.
--
--
Ikki took slow strides down the darkened hall, hands in his pockets, and as he walked past Sano, who was cockily leaning against the wall with a smirk on his stupid face, he pretended not to see him. But even as he walked past the older boy, Sano made it a point to speak to him. The crow was pretty sure Sano was just waiting for him to exit Ringo's room, just so he could toy with him.
"Touching."
Of course, Ikki had no choice but to stop. An unnamed nerve had been struck. If it was personal, Ikki didn't know; it could have just been the fact that someone had been listening in on something that was none of their business in the first place. It was bad enough that he had to hurt someone close to him, but someone else had to listen in on it.
Without turning around, Ikki said his peace.
"Shut the fuck up."
He could practically hear the smirk in Sano's voice.
"Temperamental, I see. I suggest you try to keep that temper of yours under control," he suggested. "Lest you let it hinder you in your time of circumspection."
Ikki's shoulders tensed a little more than they already were. He made an offended face, but refused to turn around and let the controller of time to see it. This guy kept popping in and out and warning him to keep his cool. Which in the end only encouraged him to lose it.
"Care to enlighten me on that little sentiment?" Ikki bit stiffly.
The haughty chuckle that reached his ears didn't do much for Ikki's mood. Sano pushed himself off the wall and stood just behind the smaller boy, putting a lithe hand on Ikki's shoulder. He leaned down just enough to whisper into Ikki's ear.
"I could have sworn you said you could handle everything yourself," he said, and it was enough to urge Ikki into turning around. "And yet…"
Ikki glared treacherously. He knew exactly what Sano was getting at, and it pissed him off he would have the nerve to even hint about such things. Kazu was involved now, just like he said he wouldn't allow, but he was safe and in bed now so what was the problem? Ikki decided to fight back.
"Like you would know anything about looking after your comrades!" he whispered harshly. Then he mumbled as postscript; "I keep an eye out for my team mate's best interests. You don't even let people sleep at night."
"Oh?" Sano said, his arching brows showing that he was perplexed. "Do go on."
Ikki didn't want to get into things like this right now, and he wasn't sure why he'd even brought it up - perhaps the thought of Kazu in bed triggered the memory - but Sano was pushing, and he was irritated, and this night had already gone to hell as it was.
"For your information, you drove Kazu up to my room the other night because you were being too loud for him to get any sleep."
And Sano chuckled again. This resulted in another glare on Ikki's part.
"Is that what he told you?"
With an insufferable smile, Sano just continued his chortling and turned the other way, shaking his head farcically as he descended the stairs. Ikki blinked after him once, twice, three times before he found the nerve to shout anything at all.
"Just… what the hell does that mean!?"