Disclaimer: Smile, I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh, and it's very unlikely that YOU'RE ON CANDID CAMERA!

The Yu-Gi-Oh gang ran around like Scooby Doo and his hippie-ass friends for about 12 minutes before each and every one of them collapsed at the same time, causing Kaiba to trip over them. Then they started running again until they wandered into a cave and Kaiba calmed down at long last.

"Where are we?" asked a frightened Mokuba.

"We're in a cave." Joey stated teasingly. "What, are you afraid of the bad old dark, Mokuba?"

"No way!"

Suddenly, a noise from close by echoed through the cave.

"AAHH!" Mokuba screamed.

"Relax, that was just Kaiba hitting his head on the ceiling." said Tea.

"It's not my fault I'm so tall!" said a frustrated Kaiba. "Anyway, I'm supposed to be chasing you right now, but I'm just going to give you a warning."

"Whatever, douche." Yami mocked.

"What was that you said?" Kaiba snarled.

"Uh, I said, THANK YOU BERRY BERRY MUCH FOR NOT CHASING ME!"

So they walked a little further. That is, until they heard a scraping noise.

"What now?" Tristan shouted.

"Uh, that would be my hair scraping the ceiling." Yami Marik answered awkwardly.

"Well, duck down!"

"With Pegasus walking behind me? No thanks."

So their walking continued. After a few minutes, they started getting a little worried, because there was a third and final noise that could not be explained away as just the cast's incompetence at not hitting their heads or hair on the ceiling.

"We've walked too far, we need to go back!" said Mokuba.

"No way, not until we find out where that noise is coming from!" Joey told him, walking a little faster.

"But what if it's a g-g-ghost?"

"Nonsense, Scooby- uh... Mokuba. There's not going to be a ghost in this cave." Yami said comfortingly.

"After seeing a cow come out of the ocean, a ghost wouldn't seem too strange at all." Kaiba mused.

"Hey, thanks for being such a comforting big brother. Dick." Tea scolded.

"I'm sure you want dick, Tea." Kaiba shot back.

"I can vouch for that! WOOO!" Yami Marik hollered.

"Shut up, the sounds are getting closer! It sounds like a guitar." Yugi pointed out.

So the gang tiptoed ever closer to the guitar-like sounds, until finally they came across the source of the sounds.

"Donovan?" the gang shouted simultaneously. Five e-bucks to anybody who knows what that means.

"Oh, hello, visitors. I haven't had company since I arrived here in 1984. Please, sit down." Donovan said, somewhat excited.

"What the holy hell? But, I thought you were releasing an album or something. What are you doing here?" Kaiba asked.

"Ah, you are probably confused. Here, let me explain in a song I wrote for just this occasion." Donovan said, playing the opening notes of his song.

"...Sorry, guys." Kaiba apologized as the song started.

(In 1982, when my popularity was gone

I hired a cadaver just to take my place.

I moved to an island I bought for myself

So I wouldn't have to live in a vase

This island is a place without physics

Outside of the realm of space and time

I live inside of this darkened cave

Here's another sentence that rhymes

Hurdy gurdy durka durk

Hurka durky dooky doo

shamalalalalam

Two plus two is twenty two

The animals of this vast forest

Are my only company

From the largest elephant

To the tiniest bee

So welcome visitors

To my humble home

Please, do enjoy your stay

Would you like some gome?)

Donovan finished up his song with a long fucking flute solo. No one applauded.

"What the hell is gome?" asked Yami Bakura.

"Oh, I couldn't think of anything that rhymed, so I just twisted the word 'gum'. Plus, I was tired." Donovan explained.

"Okay, I guess this explains why there are cows in the ocean and you haven't aged like milk, but do you know how we can get home?" Yugi asked.

"Why would you want to leave this magnificent place? It has everything you need."

"Except TV, computers, cellphones, air conditioners, and other instruments that we use from day to day." Kaiba pointed out. "Plus, I have a corporation to run."

"Corporations are evil, and I won't have a corporation owner in MAH CAVE! Sick 'em, rabbits!" Donovan pointed to Kaiba, and the bunnies went after him. Kaiba was chased back out of the cave.

"Any more greedy corporate scumbags in my cave?" Donovan asked menacingly.

"Uh... I think Marik might be." said Yami.

"You bastard! I'm a murderous soul-shredding psychopath!" Yami Marik corrected.

"Oh, that's fine, as long as you aren't a corporate slave." Donovan said warmly. "HEY! Where's my guitar?"

"It left, with Bakura." Tea answered, pointing at the exit.

"You know what? ALL OF YOU GET OUT! YOU LET HIM TAKE THE ONLY GUITAR I'VE GOT, I DON'T CARE WHETHER OR NOT YOU FREEZE TO DEATH! OUT!" Donovan screeched manicly.

"Take it easy, man." said Joey. "I thought you were supposed to be peaceful."

"I AM, NOW GO, OR I'LL KILL YOU!" Donovan roared, pointing at the exit. Everyone left out of the cave.

TO BE CONTINUED!