"You Never Left Me Alone" – Chapter Two
Quinn sank down into her seat she had just been seated in by the air hostess who had now left her to seat the next batch of people that had entered the plane. The plane couldn't leave fast enough, she felt uneasy and a little queasy knowing that in a matter of minutes Puck would enter the place that a year ago she thought she could make her home and in a matter of minutes he would understand that Quinn had left. She looked at her watch which read 6.55am, she sighed impatiently, wondering when they would take off in the plane that was scheduled to leave around twenty minutes ago, she began to worry that if they didn't leave on time they wouldn't arrive on time and Jesse would begin to freak out.
She heard the fasten seat belt sign tick on and she looked up towards the plane ceiling smiling slightly as if she was thanking God but she wasn't. God had abandoned her a long time ago.
She closed her eyes as the plane took off, smiling through the tears that she was trying to prevent from falling down her face. She had done it. She had done the thing that she been terrified to do for the past ten months. The one thing that had restricted her to make a life for herself, a life with the one person she loved. She thought about her actions that had brought her to this point, her actions that caused her to agree to leave with Puck.
"I need you Quinn," he said, tears forming in his eyes.
"Puck, I," she swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat. "I can't, I just can't."
"Why can't you? Quinn I've lost everything that I've ever loved and the one thing that I loved the most - You, Quinn."
Quinn sighed, wiped the tears from her eyes and starting shaking her head. "You didn't love me and you don't love me Puck. You'll never know what love is, you're too concerned with not letting anyone in. I can't love you and I never will. And the truth is, I'm in love with someone else, it feels like I can't breathe without him and the fact is that I will never feel that way about you."
Quinn saw the look on his face, she had broken him.
Thinking back on that moment Quinn didn't understand why she had been so strong and so determined. So willing to tell Puck that she did not love him, so willing to tell Puck that she would never leave with him. How did he break her like she broke him? How did she let him manipulate her feelings and make her believe that she did love him when a little over a year ago she had never been so sure about anything else in the world and that was that she never loved Puck and she never will.
Puck had broken her, he had broken her in ways that made her irreversibly damaged, he had taken pieces of her that she will never get back. She will never be who she used to be because of him, her heart ached knowing that fact, knowing that she will never be the same person that Jesse St. James fell in love with.
"Miss, are you okay?" Quinn was snapped out of her thoughts as she looked to the middle aged woman that was sitting in the seat beside.
Quinn quickly wiped her tears feeling ridiculous and mad at herself for letting those tears fall. She shook her head a couple of times too many, closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Yes, Um, I'm fi-fine." Quinn tried to control herself even though she thought she would burst into tears at any moment. She got up from her seat abruptly, "Actually, no I'm not fine, excuse me," she walked slowly towards the back of the plane, trying with all her strength to hold herself together, she quickly opened the nearest door that led to the tiny bathroom area she closed it quickly and locked it.
Everything that she held in for the past year came rushing out of her, all the emotions, the hate she felt towards herself, the pain Puck had caused her and the pain of longing for Jesse. She let out a cry and started breathing rapidly and loudly. She slammed her fist on the locked door and fell to the ground and finally allowed herself to break down.
"Dammit, dammit, dammit," she kicked the bottom of the tall metal sink that was inches away from her body. She grabbed the rim of it and pulled herself up. She looked at herself in the mirror, she wiped her eyes but the tears kept falling and with all her strength she was still not able to control the cries of agony that kept escaping from her lips. Her fingertips began to trace the bruise on the side of her left cheek. Her tears began to slowly stop as she began to control her breathing again.
"Miss!" Someone knocked on the door. "Is everything okay in there?"
Quinn tried to contain herself as she looked at the door. "Yes, Uh, I'm just a nervous flyer is all. I'll be out in a minute." She looked back at her broken reflection in the mirror. She turned the tap on and splashed her face with cold water, she dried her face with some paper towel and turned to face the door. She took a deep breath and whispered to herself. "Okay, just breathe."
She met the air hostess at the door. She tried her best to form some horrible excuse for a smile to reassure her that she was okay. She moved past her and headed back to her seat despite the fact that the woman continued to look at her with worry. She gracefully sat back down in her seat, the woman next her looked at her curiously but said nothing. Quinn rested her head back on the seat and closed her eyes, refusing to let herself think of anything that would cause her pain.
Once the plane landed Quinn had collected her bags and moved slowly through the people rushing to greet their love ones. She scanned through the crowd not knowing what she would feel when her eyes locked with Jesse's. The queasiness hit her again and her stomach began to knot as she saw him towards the back of the crowd dressed in his usual color of black. He quickly looked up and they locked eyes from across the room. Suddenly she felt her eyes sting as her tears returned, she rushed towards him knowing that being close to him will make everything all right. She tried her hardest to form a sort of smile once she reached him. He said nothing but Quinn saw the longing and guilt in his eyes and she saw his eyes reach the bruise on her face and she quickly turned her head away. She was so embarrassed that she had let this happen, she felt his soft hand touch hers and she faced him again, he gently pulled her into his arms and that's when she began to break down, just as she did in the bathroom.
A/N: Thank you guys so much for the reviews on the previous chapter! I felt so happy when I read them and glad that you guys are liking the story. This story is a little harder to right and am constantly finding myself listening to depressive music to try and get in the mood to write this story because I don't want to miss anything that Quinn should be feeling because after all the concept of this story is very deep which is why there is no way I'm going to be able to finish it in three chapters which is why I'm planning to do more. I'll be writing more flash backs in the next chapter one that includes Jesse and maybe even the flash back that shows how Puck got Quinn to leave with him. As much as this is a sad story I feel a little hope everytime I think of Quinn and Jesse, ha. Anyway I'm really excited to write flash backs so that readers can begin to piece things together that haven't been answered yet.
Anywhooo, thank you guys so so soooooooo much for the reviews they mean the world to me. Please continue to read and review and tell me what you think!