The day drew to a dreary end without anything of interest to commit to memory. I heard a few more rumors about where Mr. Vexen could possibly be. None of them were even close to the wonderful truth. I felt a wickedly satisfying feeling of superiority. Nobody would ever know what really happened to Mr. Vexen. His flesh is slowly liquefying as I walk towards Demyx's car. I feel a tingle down my spine as I imagine his body decaying in the beautiful way that nature intended. The acid should be slowly liquefying his muscular tissue by now and the skeleton should be next. Then Mr. Vexen will cease to exist except in the thoughts of school board in need of a new science teacher.
I know that most people would think my fascination with post mortem human anatomy is fucked up. But I think some people's obsession with The Hills is fucked up. Everybody has something that they have an undying thirst to know every detail about. I just really find the process of death to be a great mystery that I intend to solve.
My thoughts flicker back to my current situation when Demyx slams his car door shut. He gives me a sidelong glance as he starts the car. I rest my feet on the dashboard and wait for Demyx to say whatever he's working up the nerve to confront me about. Demyx is not a master at hiding his thoughts, especially from me. I'm going to guess it has something to do with what me and Zexion discussed earlier.
"So Death Creatures Alive Part 5 is going to be sick! I heard it's going to be 5 times bloodier than the original. And that one guy comes back to life and fucks shit up! Apparently they use pig blood in this one instead of corn syrup to make it look realistic. Isn't that gross?" jabbers Demyx. I raise my eyebrows and rattle off lame responses at appropriate times while Demyx goes into a long explanation of how awesome this stupid movie is going to be. Demyx doesn't need much input from other people to have a conversation.
We wait at the stop light to get out of the parking lot. It's a mad house after school. The stop light always seems to stubbornly stay red. I look out the window and watch people walk through the parking lot doing stupid teenage things. I let Demyx become background music to my thoughts. I don't understand how everyone's outlook can change after a bell rings. It's like all the worries that plague the student body suddenly disappear as soon as it becomes 3 o' clock on a Friday afternoon. Everything is exactly the same, but everyone becomes completely different. The quiet girls are loud. The over achievers are making plans for a beer connection. The pushy jocks become jello in their girlfriend's manicured hands. Everybody puts on their weekend faces and leave their school faces shoved under their forgotten homework.
I hate to say it, but I am exactly, if not more, two faced than they are. I can look down on them all I want, but I'll still be hiding my real self from everybody but the people I kill. It's kind of funny how my victims literally take my secret to their grave.
A flash of gold catches my eye and I see Roxas traversing his way through the parking lot with his shoulders hunched up in a guarded position. He makes his way over to the cop car stealthily parked under the big oak tree by the school sign. My fellow students keep giving the squad car worried looks. I can barely make out the glint of the sunglasses belonging to the cop I talked to a couple nights ago.
Roxas jumps into the squad car and I wonder why he looks so damn nervous all the time. He's always seems to be in a state high alert. Like the world's apocalypse is just around the corner.
The light turns green and Demyx punches the gas to get as far away from school as fast as possible. I bang my head on the seat rest so hard I feel the metal bar through the thick covering of foam. "Whoa! I'm trying to live past 20 Dem!" I blurt gripping the armrests.
"Sorry, I hate that light", grins Demyx while letting off the gas. I roll my eyes and continue looking out of the window with mild interest.
"Sooooo, what happened when you had to see Vexen after school yesterday?" asks Demyx casually.
"Huh? Oh nothing new, he lectured me like a slimy little frog and I tried not to listen", I reply my hands starting to sweat a bit. Demyx is the first person to remember I had to see him after school.
"Did he say anything about not coming to school or anything?" asks Demyx eagerly.
"Nope", I say shortly. I would much rather get off this subject.
"That's so weird that he just disappeared without a trace. I heard Mr. Fair talking to the secretary about how his neighbors never saw him come home. I wonder what happened to him", speculated Demyx.
"I don't know", I reply wiping my sweaty hands on my school pants.
"What if that serial killer got him? I mean, nobody liked that old toad, but that's a harsh fate even for him."
"Yeah haha", I mutter. I don't know if Demyx is just making lucky guesses or trying to allude to me that he knows more than I thought he did. I feel my chest tightening up with worry. If Demyx can piece this together so easily then the police will be busting down my door within days.
"Do you feel okay, Ax? You look kinda pale", asks Demyx searching my face.
"I just haven't eaten all day. I feel kind of woozy", I reply, which isn't a complete lie. I really haven't eaten all day and my head has become a fuzz of thoughts flitting around my head with speculation on how much the cops could know. Demyx could just be fumbling his way to the truth. He hasn't said anything concrete about me killing Mr. Vexen. I'm just being paranoid. There is no possible way Demyx is even remotely perceptive enough to discover the Entity.
"Please don't tell me you're manorexic", laughs Demyx.
"You caught me", I smile sarcastically, "I'll grab something when I get home."
"Yeah good idea", replies Demyx. An awkward silence thickens the air in the car. I look out the window and wait for Demyx to start jabbering again, but he silently keeps his eyes on the road. My skin starts to prickle in apprehension. I can sense Demyx racking his brain for a way to bring up a touchy subject. I look at the street signs desperately. We're still quite a few blocks away from my house.
"So I heard you talked to Zexion", starts Demyx.
I cut him off quickly, "Dem, this whole thing is really no big deal. You guys don't need to worry."
"I know. I know. I was just wondering if this had anything….to do with…you know….next week", Demyx says in an uncharacteristically solemn voice.
Next week? What's next week? I rack my brain for a reason next week would have any significance, but I don't recall anything. I quickly decide to bullshit my way through this conversation until I figure out what Dem is talking about.
"No it doesn't have anything to do with…that. It was just stress, like I told you", I reply.
"Oh…well I know you've been pretty torn up since Reno died and I thought the…anniversary of his death could have been getting to you. I mean…I'm here for you man. You don't have to deal with this alone, you know?" says Demyx in that 'so sorry for your loss' voice that plagued every conversation I had those terrible weeks after what happened to Reno. I close my eyes and silently curse myself for forgetting that next week is November 15. I feel the Entity rise up and wrap itself around my shoulders in a cold embrace. I promised I would never let that date leave my mind. A guilt deeper than any emotion I have ever felt racks my body.
"Ax…" Demyx says softly.
"Yeah?" I whisper numbly. How could I forget the most defining moment in my life? The reason why everything is this way now! The reason my whole life is consumed by the Entity.
"You shouldn't beat yourself up about this", Demyx says in that annoyingly soft voice.
I cringe at his words. I try not to think about Reno but he's like a ghost that haunts me at every turn, silently pointing out my guilt.
"Just…stop Dem. I don't want to talk about this," I say through gritted teeth.
"Ax, it's been a few years and I think you need to talk about it with somebody. You can't just bottle it up; it can really screw with your head."
"Are you a fucking shrink now? No! So just drop it!" I spit the words out laced with the Entity. I want to scream and rant and smash Demyx's perfectly gelled hair against the window, but I reel in the Entity and it grudgingly lets me take control of myself.
"I'm sorry Ax. I just wanted to help," says Demyx in a small voice. I can tell he is a little thrown off by my sudden anger, but I don't have much sympathy for him. He knows all too well I don't like people to mention my brother's name, much less try to get me to talk about his death.
"It's fine," I mutter.
We drive for a few minutes in silence before finally and thankfully arriving at my house. I have never been through a more aggravating car ride. I just want to sit in my room and relax for a few hours. But before I get out of the car Demyx feels the need to talk again, "Are you still going to come to the movie tonight? It's going to be a lot of fun."
"I don't know," I reply shortly.
"Everybody is going to go. We even got the new kid to come! Come on!" begs Demyx.
"Okay I'll go," I give in. I'm not really feeling social, but Demyx wouldn't let me hear the end of it if I didn't go. Plus I want to find more out about the new kid.
"Awesome! I'll see you at 7! Death Creatures Alive Part 5!" yells Demyx.
"Yeah see you," I reply as I get out of the car and make my way into my house. I avoid my mom in the kitchen and go straight to my room to mentally prepare myself for tonight. I don't want to feel
even a wisp of the Entity while I'm watching the stupid gore fest movie.
Sooooo Review? Give me some more motivation to write?