Author's Note: Thanks for all of the reviews, I appreciate it. And, in answer to a reviewer (and because I must have been vague), I was not calling Beckett old, she was talking to an old lady at the counter.

Beckett ignored the stares from Ryan and Esposito as she strode purposefully to her desk. She quickly retrieved the large stash of money, frowning as she forced herself not to dwell on its purpose.

This morning, giving away the watch, it hurt more than she thought it would.

It felt like she was giving away a part of herself. And maybe she was.

But it shouldn't have to hurt like that.

She dumped the tightly bound stack into her drawer, pushing away her thoughts as she tried to focus on the work in front of her.

Slamming the door shut, she winced at the loud bang it made, the sound reminding her of the unintended force she had put behind it as Ryan nearly jumped through the roof. She looked at the pair of detectives sheepishly as Esposito glared at her in response.

She frowned, not wanting to apologize and draw attention to the younger detective whose cheeks were currently flaming with embarrassment. He still wasn't at the top of his game, but no one—especially her—was about to suggest he take more time off.

Because this job, it was a part of her.

And after everything Ryan went to in order to help her, she could overlook the way he jumped at startling sounds. She could forget the fact that he still couldn't show up at a scene when it was raining. She could ignore the 'coffee breaks' and pretend that they weren't a desperately needed escape.

Because, these people, not only did they understand the job, they felt a lot like family.

And there weren't many people that did.

"I'm—" Ryan stood quickly, stuffing his trembling hands into his pockets. "I'm going to run down to seventh and grab a cup of coffee. Anybody want anything?"

Esposito shrugged nonchalantly, "No thanks, Bro."

Beckett shook her head, "I'm good."

Nobody bothered to comment about the fine coffee Ryan loved that was available in their break room. Because this wasn't about coffee. This was Ryan needing time to deal.

All of them understood that.

And after being nearly drowned in ice cold water by a professional assassin, anyone would suffer from long-term effects.

So if it took Ryan a little while to deal, they would all give him whatever time he needed.

Because that's what you did for family.

Beckett watched as Ryan rushed out of the precinct, not able to help the pang of worry that rose within her. "He's not sleeping." She murmured, wondering why everyone she cared about seemed to be falling apart in front of her.

Esposito rolled his chair toward her, leaning back with his arms folded tightly across his chest as he narrowed his gaze. "You had to do that? You know how he is right now."

"Sorry," She sighed, her shoulders slumping slightly with the weight of the world that was pushing down on her, "It was just—it was a bad morning." She explained vaguely, picking up the files in front of her and pretending to busy herself with the unimportant files piled up neatly on her desk.

Esposito furrowed his brow as he watched her intently, trying to place what seemed so off about her. Catching a glimpse of her bare left wrist, he asked pointedly without bothering to beat around the bush, "Where's your watch?"

She bit her lip and, without looking up, lied. "I must have left it home this morning."

If only life were that simple.

"Left what home this morning?" Castle asked, sliding a cup of coffee and a bagel toward Beckett.

"It's a paperwork day Castle." She tried to sound nonchalant as she picked up the food in front of her. "Your day off." She shrugged as if it didn't matter.

But it did.

Because she couldn't take Castle's prying. Not today.

She just had to make it through today.

Tomorrow morning, the money—the stark reminder of all she had been forced to give up—would be gone.

And she could deal with it.

But Castle's puppy-dog eyes as he catalogued her every move was not going to help.

"I don't take days off." Castle shrugged, leaning back in the chair and resting his feet on her desk. "Now what did you leave at home this morning?"

"Nothing."

"Her watch is missing." Esposito commented, still watching Beckett closely.

"Don't you have something you should be doing?" She snapped with annoyance.

He eyed her carefully as he rolled back toward his own desk. "Not if you're hiding something." He mumbled.

Castle frowned as the watch in his pocket seemed to grow heavier. "You lost your watch?" He asked, giving her an out while wondering if she would really lie to him.

After all, they were partners.

"No I just forgot it." She dismissed easily, though her hand subconsciously covered the drawer that held the massive amount of cash she had exchanged the item for this morning. "Now I've got to finish up some paperwork. Do you mind?" She asked, glancing up at him only briefly lest he somehow see right through her.

Castle frowned fighting the pit in his stomach that grew at the realization that not only had she just lied to him, she was pushing him away.

This wasn't like her.

There was definitely something wrong.

"Yeah. I need to go ask Lanie..." He trailed off as he tried to come up with a viable excuse, settling lamely for "a question." He frowned as he saw her eyebrow quirk in disbelief at his attempt to excuse himself.

"Oh." She said lamely, trying to come up with some reason why he shouldn't go talk to her best friend. Finding none, and realizing it would only draw attention to herself, she shrugged nonchalantly. "Whatever."

She could tell her feigned ambivalence did nothing to dissuade his curiosity.

Why couldn't he just leave her alone?

But thankfully, she had taken care of the watch at some antique store she knew he would never frequent. Because if Castle had seen her this morning, there would be no satisfying his thirst for information.

Castle forced himself to flash an apologetic grin as he excused himself, feeling a surge of hope as he saw the hesitation in her eyes.

She didn't want him to talk to Lanie.

Which meant that maybe someone had answers.