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Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, and its characters, or plot. The characters, books, and plot are property of Stephenie Meyer. I make no money from writing this. I just love Twilight.

Warning: Lemons in future chapters. Rated NC-17 for a reason. Violence, adult language, drugs, assault, and sexual content.

Chapter Specific Warning: Adult content, but no lemons.

Big thanks to my beta, Lisa aka cfmom, who totally rocks. This story would not be what it is without her.

Please enjoy Emmett's POV of Chapters 5 and 6 of Vanity and Patience.

Chapter 4: Hold up… I'm a what?

I didn't notice the moment the burn stopped. I had become so used to lying still, in the hope that I would grow numb to the fiery sensation that I missed the last of the embers that were blazing at my toes and fingertips.

My thoughts were… blank.

A clean slate. Very strange.

My eyes fluttered open slowly.

I was completely floored.

Shades of colors I'd never seen before were present in the rays of sunlight that beamed through the windows. I could see dust particles floating in the air, all new to me. I could distinguish every tiny crack in the walls of this otherwise perfect structure.

Still on my back, I took my first breath. I stiffened immediately. Burning! The fire had returned. Was I not done burning in hell? A strange sound came from my throat. It sounded like a bear. Was I growling?

With one swift movement, I threw all of my weight into my bottom half. I landed with my feet on the tile floor, the rest of my upper body following. Oh, shit! That was crazy neat. I'd always been lithe, but never lo this degree. Did I really do that?

I snarled as I took another deep breath, the fire blazing in my throat again. Snarling seemed to be automatic.

I could hear strange sounds from nearby. There was a stream just a few yards from here, a bird flying by. With the strangest clarity, I could hear the highway a couple miles away. It was wild.

In the next instant, I did a backwards somersault and landed with my feet on the table, leaving slight indentations in its surface. Holy shit, I was doing that.

I surveyed the whole room, my face frozen in a scowl.

I tensed immediately as I saw four figures before me.

Enemies, a small part of my brain thought.

Where did that voice come from? But it sounded so sure, so I figured it was right. They were enemies.

My enemies.

Two of them advanced towards me.

A snarl rose from my throat before I could figure out what was happening. I tensed automatically.

My mind was on red alert. Enemy approaching. Watch your back.

"Emmett, son," the enemy began, waving a surrendering hand. "I'm not sure how much you were able to retain during your change. I'm Carlisle. This is my family: Edward, Esme, and Rosalie."

I blinked my eyes as I followed his hand gesture. His soothing tone brought back a little clarity, and my defensive enemy alert lifted.

For the first time, I saw a fair-haired man in a white coat, with a copper-haired guy in front of him. The redhead looked like he was in serious need of a comb.

I could faintly remember the doctor. Wasn't he the cat I thought was God? I wasn't too sure. I felt like my mind had reset itself.

Two women stood behind them. One had hair like toffee; the kind of sauce that my mom would make and pour over cake. The other one had hair as bright as the sun. My eyes lingered on the fair-haired one.

She grinned at me. At the sight of such a greeting, I felt something stir within my chest, but the burn in my throat overpowered any feeling I was experiencing at the moment. I found it a little strange, coming from an enemy. Did I know her?

Most likely not. I quickly averted my sight and let my eyes sweep the room again, in case I had missed something. I took another scorching breath, grunting slightly as my lungs felt like they were on fire.

Things were certainly different from anything I'd known before. Funny thing was that I couldn't seem to remember shit from before to have anything to compare it with. I did remember a man and a young woman talking to me about vampires and hunting animals. At least I think I did. Had it been a dream, or rather a nightmare?

Was that the burn I felt in my air passage? Were they speaking the truth?

"He's confused," the young man explained to the others over his shoulder. He turned back to me. "Yes, you are now a vampire," he confirmed. "And we are vampires as well. We do not want to harm you." He took a step towards me. "Rosalie found you, and Carlisle turned you."

I groaned in response before I snorted. I was befuddled and a bit stunned at what the boy was saying.

"A vampire?" I asked, finally speaking. Was that my voice? My expression became clouded with a moment of disbelief and confusion. My eyes grew wide, startled at the new sound. I cleared my throat, thinking maybe that would take it back to normal.

I was able to analyze this in fractions of a second: my voice, the sounds I could hear, my crazy vision that had me seeing things I'd never seen before, and the raging inferno that smoldered in my windpipes.

"Yes," the man called Carlisle confirmed, as I rubbed my throat, still a bit stunned. "You are now one of us."

Well, fuck me sideways.

"We're here to help you, remember?" Edward reminded me.

What the hell? I took a step back, scrutinizing the redhead. "How can I be so sure?" My voice was dubious. I'm sure my face was too.

"Rosalie and Carlisle, they told you our story," Edward continued. "I know you remember."

My temper flared. "How are you reading my mind?" I growled. This young copper headed cat was the most annoying thing ever. Stupid know-it-all. My lips curled, baring my teeth. My body didn't want to trust him, even though my mind hadn't yet fully decided.

He recoiled, taking a step back. "It's an enhanced ability," he said slowly.

I took two steps back as the man named Carlisle made a step towards me. A grizzly snarl began to rise from my chest.

"Be careful, Carlisle," the know-it-all warned softly.

Carlisle held his hand up to know-it-all as if to hush him, before turning back to me. "Son, I know you're concerned. We're not here to harm you. We're here to help you."

Enemy too close. I took a defensive stance, backtracking and crouching. I tensed to spring.

Carlisle moved his hands slowly in front of himself, palms forward facing me. "Won't you listen to what we have to say? If you'd like for me to explain this to you again, I'd be glad to."

Enemies have you cornered. I took note of their strange yellow eyes again.

"There's no need to be alarmed, son. We're not here to fight you. I promise," he continued, in a mild tone. He pointed to himself. "Again, I'm Carlisle. This is my family. I turned you in the hopes that you'd join us. Please, give us a moment to explain what we are and what we stand for."

His tone was calm and comforting, seeming to break through the alert that flashed through my system. Something in his eyes held an unmistakable kindness that was easy to trust. Slowly, my body straightened up, standing at ease.

"Thank you, Emmett. I'll take this opportunity to help you meet my family. Once again, you've met Edward, my adopted son. That over there is my wife, Esme, and my daughter, Rosalie," Carlisle introduced, his hand pointing in their direction.

My eyes switched to his wife and then to his daughter as my line of sight followed Carlisle's gesture. The daughter. Rosalie, was it? Something about her was familiar, but the blazing in my esophagus clouded whatever part of my brain was tied to her face. I had to wonder again, did I know her?

Carlisle's words took my attention, my eyes switching back to him when he spoke. "We are all vampires who live together here in peace. Though it is our nature to feed on humans, we have strived on being as ethical as we can, and do not prey on innocent souls. Our family is different from others of our kind in that we choose to feed on the blood of animals."

Blood.

The thought made my throat go up in flames. I clenched my fist and dropped my chin. Ugh, my throat burned. Why is it doing that?

"Your throat burns because you need to feed," the boy named Edward answered, automatically.

My lips pulled back behind my teeth as a hiss escaped from my mouth. "Wow, you're really annoying," I snarled at the know-it-all, glowering at him.

"Emmett, son," Carlisle chimed in. "Maybe you would like to go hunting? The thirst is probably becoming rather uncomfortable."

At the mention of hunting, my body grew rigid, cupping my throat with my hand as I gulped some thick substance that pooled in my mouth. Realizing Carlisle might be right, I nodded in agreement.

And so we hunted.

I followed the know-it-all, who led the way. I imitated his speed. I ran quick, dodging trees and other barriers with no problem. I didn't hesitate to make giant leaps over rivers and streams like he did. If he could do it, I could do it better.

I could feel the others trailing behind me. We dashed west, but I had no idea where we were. It all looked the same to me at the moment.

The know-it-all stopped short. He spun around to face me, several feet from where I stood. Smart guy.

"Emmett, now concentrate," Edward guided me. "What do you hear?"

I listened for the smallest instant, analyzing the sounds around us. I shifted upon layers of noises. I heard the steady rhythm of something that caught my attention. Hearts? And chewing. Six hearts beating, and the same number of mouths chewing on grass. A grunt rose from my chest. "Heartbeats, six of them," I breathed. "And chewing…on…grass or something. The sound is coming from Just south of those trees." I nodded my head towards their direction. "What are they?"

A breeze blew by, followed by a scent that turned up the flames in my throat by half. My nose wrinkled. It was sweet in an… earthy sort of way. Not what I expected.

I heard a giggle, and my head popped up. Was the young blonde dame laughing at me? I glowered at her, and her giggling halted.

"Bison," Know-it-all, a name I decided to call him internally, answered, distracting me.

I turned to him, picturing myself shooting through those trees like a bullet from a rifle and grabbing them all. I'd imagined taking them by their heads and snapping them at their necks. Only just after that, I'd tear into them with my teeth. All six of them.

"You've got the right idea, but I'll show you quickly just to make sure," he encouraged. "You can follow behind."

I sprinted to follow Know-it-all, already snaking his way out to the meadow where the herd of bison fed. I followed close behind him. I caught him sneak a quick glance at the doctor before running, the doctor nodding only a fraction, following behind me.

Know-it-all took a quick leap into the air, diving straight onto a bison too quickly for it to react, simply falling to straddle it, and snap its neck within seconds. I observed as he sunk his teeth into the back of the animal as he did so before beginning to slurp its blood.

Mmm.

I drew in the smell of that blood with my last inhale before I launched myself in the air with no hesitation. I took down the rest of the herd in the same time that Edward took down the one. I claimed two of the mammals.

My teeth found the flesh of the first warm body through its course fur, and almost immediately, thick crimson liquid gushed out. I sucked on it, draining the limp thing. It wasn't the best, I would guess, but it certainly did the job of washing away my burn. It was very… earthy, like the smell. Woodsy, grassy. When I was done, the burn was still there, so I took the second body without hesitating.

"How is it?" the doctor asked, curious.

I pulled away only enough to answer his question. "Like eating a garden salad." I couldn't hide a small wince. I answered like I would always answer—honestly. I continued to drain it dry, despite the fact that it had the appeal of broccoli to me—a meat and potatoes kind of guy. Rabbit food. I couldn't complain too much. Anything was better than the fiery hell in my gullet. I even went for a third, leaving the other two for the rest of the family. Yep, I was greedy, but the scorching fire just beneath my tonsils kept me from caring.

The doctor and his family helped me discard the carcasses "properly," explaining that cleanliness lends itself to discretion. I did as they said. Who was I to question these seasoned folk?

We made for a sprint home when I heard Know-it-all stop dead in his tracks.

"Fuck…Damn it all to hell," he exclaimed, exasperated.

"Hey, watch your mouth, young man," the doctor's wife reprimanded him.

"I'm sorry. It's just… argh… I should have been more careful. I forgot to survey the land!" His face was tense, his hands in fists, tension rolling through him.

I stared at the redhead for a moment, completely lost. I suddenly remembered the male voice who fought with the angel about taking me home. The one who needed to calm down, and I realized this was the same guy. This guy certainly needed to relax.

Suddenly, an insanely delicious scent came swooshing around in from the east, and all reason floated away.

The faint relief from my earlier hunt was no longer valid against the burn that consumed my air passage now. I could hear it—two sets of two-legged mammals—two sets of steady heartbeats. I felt liquid pool just beneath my tongue.

I drew the scent in, filling my lungs with its appetizing, aroma. Not even seconds had past, and my mind was already flooding with plots.

I was gone before anyone could stop me.

Before I knew it, I was pushing myself forward, the balls of my feet digging into the forest floor and driving me towards the source of the best smell in the world.

I knew what my prey was before anyone could tell me what I was after.

Humans.

I felt the enemies come after me to try to stop me, but they were no match. I couldn't let my opponents reach my prey before I did, nor could I let them stop me from getting to the two unfortunate hikers. I faintly recognized the doctor or Know-it-all when they came after me, but they were easily rid of with the smallest shove or flick of an elbow.

Enemies, the inner voice told me again.

Despite their attempts to distract me, I kept my mind at the task at hand.

With my adversaries out of the way, I propelled myself towards the humans, every part of my body working to get to these mortals within my grasp. They were history; my brain new it. My body knew it. Down to the marrow in my bones, I knew it. The way I came at these humans so stealthy in nature had me reeling.

No one could stop me.

No one.

It was almost effortless when I lurched at them with unbelievable precision, and I'd never felt more alive in my life. I took the first by his head, my other hand on his shoulder, breaking his neck in fractions of a second.

I could sense the fear in the second one, smelling it in his scent, as he registered for just a moment what was happening. But I'd caught and killed him with my bare hands myself before he could even think of running away. I could hear the snaps of their neck, and massive amounts of thick liquid accumulated beneath my tongue. I couldn't believe my strength, and I wasn't about to complain about it.

I wouldn't complain about anything after the tantalizing aroma of these juicy humans had completely taken me.

I sunk my teeth into each of their jugulars one by one, greedily sucking all the dense, luscious warmth. I felt it fill my belly, consuming my sanity just as I was consuming the liquid's host.

Well, damn.

Thick. Salty. Warm. Deliciousness.

My eyes rolled back at all the pleasure it gave me, and very faint human memories , mere pictures, came to mind as I sated myelf of the one pleasure my new nature lusted for.

I'd known the rush from a hit from marijuana.

I'd found the pleasure in a nice glass of whiskey.

I'd reveled the ecstasy as I released into a girl's mouth a few times in my life.

But nothing was ever as sweet as this. Nothing was ever this sinful.

And I knew at that moment, as the tepid liquid coated my throat, that nothing would ever be the same to me again.

I hadn't even finished draining off the first when I grabbed the second one—so eager to have more.

I was immediately incensed when I'd hit the last of the blood. I dropped the cold body to the ground.

Wiping my mouth that was still dripping with the man's blood, I realized I had an audience. I licked the remains of the precious crimson liquid off my hand. I couldn't help moaning at the taste. It was just too lip smacking delicious. I licked the last of the remaining drops off the side of my palm before looking up at the four horrified immortals incredulously. "That was so fucking… good," I growled, the lust for blood pouring out of my voice.

They stared back at me with large eyes and open mouths.

I gestured towards the corpses, stalking angrily towards the coven. I could remember what they'd said… an animal only lifestyle.

Yeah. I don't think so.

"I'm supposed to give this up?" I groaned, an underlying sarcasm underneath my tone. "Isn't this what we're meant to do?"

"It doesn't have to be that way, Emmett," the doctor answered, all of them taking steps back.

They should step back, the voice from before said to me. They're enemies. They want to stand in the way of you and your prey.

I grimaced at the doctor, the inner voice sounding reasonable to me. Its reasoning must be valid. These people didn't want me to find my pleasure. They didn't want me near human blood. "You deny everything we are as vampires." My voice was curt. It wasn't a question—I was justifying his thoughts.

The misguided doctor sighed, hopelessness in his body language. "It is possible for a vampire to live peacefully among humans. If you feed on animals we are more likely to establish a bond with each other based on love. We are able to live amongst people and our kind in peace."

I huffed in complete doubt. Definitely misguided. "I don't think I can stay," I snorted. "If hunting humans is what we're built for, why deny it? Why follow you?"

"It's a state of mind, Emmett. They are human beings, with families and homes. You were once one just a few days ago. All of us were. We keep that in mind, and when we draw from that concept, we can have regard for human life."

My face changed as my eyes scanned all of their faces, and I was sure all of my doubt surfaced in that one look to all four of them. They were crazy. Completely mad.

"Will you stay with us? Stay to try, at least? If you cannot stand it, we won't make you stay any longer than you want to. You may go when you wish. Our home is open to you." he insisted, but his eyes still looked hopeless. Yeah. He knew he was nowhere close to having a chance in hell of convincing me of shit.

I fought a smug face.

"What is your choice, son?"

I thought about the family, the good nature of both the doctor and his wife. I felt slight confusion and frustration. But most of all, I was full of doubt. Could I really even attempt to try their lifestyle? I thought about the barely satisfied feeling from the bison, and the high that I was on after the human. The insanely sinful, pleasure-filled high.

I knew I didn't need to chew it over for more than a fraction of a moment, because all directions pointed towards one conclusion: leaving.

I finally looked up to meet the blonde doctor's gaze. "I will not go with you," I answered, completely content with my decision.

And like that, I'd turned on my heel and began to walk away.

"No," I heard, a sob erupting from a lady. It was the blonde. "He can't just leave like this. Will someone please do something? Say something?"

A pause. I felt myself flinch at the sound. Something about that voice tugged at me from the inside.

"Anything?" I heard the voice say. "Carlisle? Someone, please!"

"Rosalie, it's his choice. It's not ours to make for him." The doctor.

"No, Carlisle, no," I heard her scream.

"We can't make him stay, sweetheart." A softer voice. The doctor's wife.

I kept walking, lengthening my stride and looking ahead.

"No!" I heard a woman yell.

But then I heard it. Footsteps coming from behind me.

Enemy coming in hot! The voice, on edge.

I heard people yell, but I didn't register, all I knew was an enemy was coming after me.

A tug on my arm.

I could hear my opponent speak, but I couldn't understand what he was saying. My eyes filled with a red haze of danger, my whole body coiling into a spring.

In a fraction of a second, I turned to the enemy, and let out a booming growl at the fiend.

My hand gripped my opponent's neck, surprised at how small it was. I didn't care. Every bone in my body was programmed not to trust anyone. Not one being on this planet, including the one I clutched by the throat.

Snarls rolled from my chest, pouring out of my mouth as my opponent unsuccessfully fought my grip. I was a bit smug that I was so strong. I only squeezed further, satisfied by the metallic screech and crunch his skin made. I felt his flesh crack beneath my palm, and the pads of my fingers.

There were sounds of crying and protest, and as my aggression slowly receded, my mind began to make out the voices, only slightly familiar to me. The doctor's wife was sobbing, begging me to stop. I could here the smooth tone of the doctor, asking me to put her down.

Her?

Coming into clarity, my eyes focused on the creature, my supposed opponent I clasped by the neck. A flash came to my mind as I recognized the long waves of soft, golden hair. The strange, but beautiful eyes of my opponent that were losing focus as a result of my chokehold. I began to recognize her lashes, so long that they went from here to Chattanooga… as she fought her control of my grip.

A loud choke came from her, the voice no longer muffled, ringing in my ears. Like… wind chimes?

Did I know that sound?

A far part of my brain stirred, activating a memory in its confines—a blurry human one that it had suppressed. The beautiful angel. The one who carried me God. The one I'd go anywhere with. Even to hell.

"Yes, that is her," I heard someone say forcefully. It was Know-It-All's voice, slicing through my reverie.

This couldn't be… The same angel that stayed with me through hell. The one that I'd feared God would take away as I burned through that inferno.

"She is the one who never left your side," Know-it-All confirmed, taking a daring step towards me. "That's her."

My eyes switched to the redhead and then back to the blonde, delicate immortal I held by the neck. Could it be?

"She is the same woman that carried you home, and now you're hurting her," he uttered, every word slow and deliberate… and cutting through the red haze of my protective nature. "She was only trying to help you."

The angel? Was this the angel? My eyes flickered to Edward and back to my opponent… with the long, gorgeous blonde mane.

Oh, God.

"Please don't hurt Rosalie," he begged, his voice, though soft, held a strain in it.

I felt my grip wavering, and my limbs begin to tremble as reality started to seep into my mind and travel to the rest of my body. The angel—the one I'd follow for the rest of my existence.

"She is the one that held your hand," her brother continued, his words leading me closer and closer to what the red haze refused to let me see.

My angel. Voice like wind chimes. Heavenly. Lovely. The one I'd never wanted to leave my side as I burned through my change.

"That's her," the doctor's son confirmed. "She never left your side. She was there for you when you needed someone, when you were changing."

The trembling rolled through my body, and my vulnerability of my now seemingly distant last human moments began to filter through the haze. My defensive goggles were lifting from my eyes. I couldn't deny it anymore.

"Please, Emmett," Edward begged, his voice strained, yet soft. "Don't do this. You don't want to. I know you don't."

A shaky sigh left my mouth as my fingers finally loosened from her delicate neck, lowering my arm to set her lightly on her feet.

Her knees gave anyway, and she fell on her side, her head down, and her hand traveling to her neck.

The same neck I'd heard screech in near destruction. The same neck I'd felt crack beneath the flesh of my own hand, and actually rejoice over.

No.

I took several trembling steps back, and I turned my head away , refusing to look at her. I felt a strange rolling in the pit of my stomach. I felt like I was suffocating inside as I felt her eyes slowly open and look to me. I was drowning in deep shame and regret.

"Emmett?" I heard a raspy voice call me. Yet even with the rasp, I knew that wind chime anywhere. My head popped up reflexively.

However, as soon as I looked up, I instantly was remorseful… for I was met by the vision of the angel, with a torn, cracked neck… only a small movement towards snapping off completely. It felt like something was torn and ripped out of me, where my heart used to be. My stomach dropped to my feet.

"Good God." The words escaped my mouth in a breath without more than the one thought.

I'd almost beheaded the angel.

I'd almost ended her life.

But what got me the most was her face—the layers of emotions that her otherworldly features held. Anger. Disappointment. Pain. Sorrow. Those I could understand. But there more confused me. Desperation. Hope. Compassion. Forgiveness.

Hope? Compassion? Forgiveness?

For me?

Forgiveness and compassion for me?

She truly was an angel of God.

And I truly was the devil to try to kill her.

In that instant, I knew I couldn't stay. My mind worked within these quick seconds to make the decision. I couldn't deal with their lifestyle to begin with, and now that I'd nearly murdered the one thing that held me to this earth, I knew I wasn't worth of any of them. So then I turned, and began to run the other direction… towards a life on my own.

"Son, please wait," the doctor beseeched. Though I winced at the good doctor's desire to talk me out of it, I just couldn't do it. My movements kept to pushing on the balls of my feet away from the coven.

"Emmett, please," the raspy wind chimes called after me. "Don't go."

I shivered at the sound of the angel begging me to stay, but the guilt kept my legs trucking forward. My fingers curled into a fist, and I sighed in resignation. My feet led me away from the life I didn't believe I could ever live, but wished that I could.

They directed me away from the only person I wished I was worthy of having.

Author's Note:

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