Yeah, I have nothing to say.

Old Friend, New Ninja

Engaged…

The thought rings in my head. Barely 13 and already engaged…

I admit I never thought the proposed alliance would come to anything. I had only stuck by it for two reasons: firstly, this was what my father had willed; secondly, by using it as an excuse I could ward off any other proposals and stay single. Obviously, the whole staying single thing was kinda shot to pieces.

It's not that Gaara-san isn't very attractive, because he definitely is, and it isn't that he's a lower social class than me in the demon world, because that will be sorted out anyway when he becomes a Hanyou. Judging by the way bloodlust just rolls off him in waves, he's a good fighter too, so I shouldn't doubt his ability to protect me and any future kitlings we may have.

All in all, it's a perfect match, but I have one problem.

Am I ready for a relationship?

Sighing, I turn to Naruto.

"Alright, Chuunin exams coming up! I guess it's time to do something about those clothes." I start to circle him, assessing how much work I'm going to have to do, as he protests.

"But Tsubomi-chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan! This jumpsuit is the best! Who doesn't love orange?" I shake my head.

"Orange is a lovely colour, but it's not exactly stealthy. Besides, I think a new outfit would show that you're a different person now. The old Naruto with the obnoxious orange jumpsuit is in the past now; or do you want to be known as the dead-last prankster forever? Tell you what, I'll even pay for some of it!" Naruto thinks it through, then nods vigorously. I smile.

Perfect...

Heh. Naruto's so easy to manipulate. I turn to Sasuke… or at least where Sasuke was a minute ago. Sensing that I was about to ask him to help with the venture he'd disappeared. Obviously someone didn't want to spend quality time with his two dear teammates.

1 hour later, I've finally found Naruto's entire new outfit. A tight black T-shirt, some baggy camouflage pants, black steel-toed army boots and a plain black expressionless mask: he was completely changed. I tie his forehead protector on his upper left arm.

We had just one more thing to do before I was done, and this wouldn't cost me a thing.

Yes, Naruto's outfit was completely different. Too bad his personality wasn't.

"Neh, Tsu-chan, where are we going?"

"The training grounds."

Oh… why?"

"Because there's something I need to teach you before you're ready."

"What is it? Is it a new jutsu? I bet it's a new jutsu! Or maybe a super-cool taijutsu move!"

"You'll see."

"Aww, I wanna know now!"

"Tough."

Finally, we'd reached the training grounds.

"Time for your first lesson: Picking your crushes carefully. Ok Naruto, for this lesson I need you to make one shadow clone. Ok, now Naruto II go and stand in the centre of the clearing." I henge into a fairly plain brunette. "Now, Naruto II, pretend I'm Sakura. Got it? Good. Act towards me like you normally would to Sakura."

"Umm… ok… hey Sakura-chan! Do you want to go to Ichiraku's with me?" At this point I hit him over the head and start yelling.

"No Naruto-no-Baka! Shut up, I'm trying to get Sasuke-kun to notice me! He's so dreamy…" I sigh happily and Naruto tries again.

"But Sakura-chan, I'm much better than him! What's so great about that stupid teme anyway?" I hit him on the head again and start a rant about Sasuke's greatness. Abruptly I stop and henge back.

"Right, how do you feel about my character?"

"She's a bitch! Why is she so mean to me?"

"Because she's a bitch, you said it yourself. Now why was that person so bad when if the same words and actions come from this face" I henge into Sakura "they're ok and you still think she's kind and sweet?"

Naruto starts to argue, saying his precious Sakura-chan isn't that bad, but I cut him off.

"How about you prove it to me? Go up to Sakura and say exactly what you said to my character. Go on, or are you afraid of being proved wrong?" He protests that he isn't, causing me to smile and drag him to the shopping centre, where Sakura should be at this time of day. Sure enough, there she is, browsing a selection of lip-glosses while watching Sasuke out of the corner of her eye. Sasuke is out buying a few shuriken from Higurashi's weapon store. Naruto takes off his mask, henges to look like he's in his normal clothes and walks boldly up to her.

I am shortly treated to an almost perfect re-enactment of what had happened in the training fields not 5 minutes ago.

Naruto eventually staggers back to me, woozy from the constant hits to his head.

"Yeah, you sure showed me how kind she is" I remark sarcastically.

Poor Naruto can only glower.

I'm gonna be really slow updating for a while, cause I've got another story to focus on, and no, that story most likely won't be going on .

It is a fanfiction, but it's just something I'm writing for my friends.