Author's Note: We spoil you. No more! We're going to get everything written up, then post them a bit later on. Bit by bit. So, TANTALIZING. Wahahahaaaa! And, so far, we still have only one suggestion as to what the competition should be. Come on, folks. We want your input! Now, on to the chapter.

Disclaimer: Nothing owned. Obviously. We make no monies.

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Chapter 17: LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR!

Marie sighed, thunking her head against the ground repeatedly. Evie was busy testing the knots on the ropes binding her hands behind her. Both girls flinched as they heard the grunts of pain coming from Jedi and Sketchers. Dingo's henchmen were busy beating up on the two men across the clearing.

Marie wiggled about, rolling to face Evie. "We're in some deep shit, my friend."

Evie nodded. "It's a problem."

"How are we getting out of this one?"

"Dunno. It's not looking too good."

Marie rolled back over, gazing at the men working to set up the camp. She grumbled to herself. She seemed to be finding herself at the mercy of people FAR too often lately. This trend simply couldn't continue. She had a reputation, after all.

Nearby, some hapless crony was inching towards a cage, holding some bread. Wincing, he reached out and gently placed the piece of bread on top of the wire. Suddenly, there was a flurry of motion, and a strange, monstrous shrieking sound. The minion scrambled away and the other workers nearby all took an involuntary step back. Soon, the bread was gone and movement subsided in the wire mesh cage. Marie blinked. What the hell had these people caught? Some sort of new alien?

A short time after the cage incident, one of the men that had taken the first shots at Jedi and Sketchers strolled over to them, attempting to whistle, and failing. It was the man that the girls had affectionately dubbed Patches. Both women glared up at him.

Smiling, Patches crouched down. "Hello! How are you two doing? Comfy? Good. Dingo sent me to check on you."

Marie's face was deadpan. "How kind of you. I am smitten by your charm."

Frowning, Patches poked at Marie's face. "That's not very nice. I think. Anyway, once we get camp set up, we'll be getting you ladies inside. And THEN the fun can start up. Dingo is very excited."

Evie cut in. "I'm sure. It's not like he can get a woman any OTHER way than rape."

"Hey! That's not cool. Those kinds of things are what got you into this in the first place. All you had to do was listen to Dingo, and he woulda been nice. But, nooo. You two just had to shoot off your mouths. And now, he gets first dibs on you, and I get second. I'm sure it's gonna be great!"

Marie snarled, whipping her bound feet around and nailed Patches in the side, knocking the air out of him and sending him sprawling on the ground. As Patches scrambled away, Marie screamed after him. "Go ahead and TRY it, you asshole! I'll rip your dick off and shove it up your ass! See how YOU like it! Yeah! THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT!"

Patches towered above the trussed up girls, scowling. "You know what? Maybe Dingo wouldn't mind if I taught you some manners first."

As he reached down to pick up Marie, a small object came flying out of the trees and smacked Patches in his one remaining good eye. Screaming, he tumbled backwards, clutching his injured eye.

With a yelp, he tripped over the cage that everyone in the camp seemed to fear, falling onto it and releasing whatever was inside it. With a resounding sqwuark, a typhoon of white feathers burst forth, lunging towards the already stunned and wounded Patches.

After causing sufficient damage, the ball of feathers charged across the camp, all the men fleeing before it. Marie watched, wide eyed, as it began coming towards her and Evie. Rolling away, Marie attempted to shield Evie. "Evie! Close your eyes! They're more vulnerable than mine!"

As Marie cringed, she heard a much softer noise and then the feeling of something tugging at the ropes around her wrists. Startled, Marie turned her head to gaze at whatever was going on behind her.

There, plucking at the strands of the rope, trying to loosen the bindings, was Binford. Marie gaped. "BINFORD! I thought you were dead! Or a delusion thought up by me when I was a bit more insane than I am at this particular moment in time. What are you doing here?"

The chicken stopped, gave Marie a look, then went back to loosening the ropes. Marie stared at Evie, dazed. "Hey, Evie?"

Evie still had her eyes scrunched close. "Yes?"

"I thought that Binford was a figment of my imagination."

"Nope."

"Well, you said he was dead. That Link killed him. At the time, I didn't question this. But it now seems much more suspicious."

The ropes fell from Marie's wrists and she pulled them around to her front, rubbing the life back into her blood deprived hands. Reaching down, she made quick work of the ropes on her ankles, then proceeded to release Evie.

As Evie sat up, the camp was in complete chaos. Something was attacking the camp and the screams of dying men resounded in the air. Binford was still on a rampage and the campfires had spread, setting some of the camp ablaze.

Marie helped Evie up and leveled a serious look at her. "Evie. What happened with Binford?"

Evie coughed nervously. "Well. Um. You see… Is this really the time for this? So much to do, you know. Like… Freeing Jedi and Sketchers! Men need rescuing."

Marie huffed. "Fine. But AFTER we rescue the males in distress, we're having a discussion about this."

As Marie turned to head towards the area they knew Jedi and Sketchers to be in, another white blur darted in front of them. Marie stopped, startled. There, once again, was something she had thought to be a figment of her insanity.

"Jimbob?"

The Great White Squirrel stared at her calmly, before bobbing his head and darting off, vanishing into the fray of people and battle. Marie stared after it, deeply confused. "Evie?"

"Yes?"

"How many of the things I thought were figments brought on by insanity are actually real, live things?"

"Far too many of them. Anyway. Jedi. Sketchers. Coming to the rescue."

Marie nodded and started forward again. "Yes, yes. Goodness, I feel oddly reassured and disturbed at the same time. It's nice to know I wasn't as crazy as I thought…"

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Marie sliced through the last of the ropes binding Jedi and stood, arching her back. "I am so sore. Bleh. I can't wait to blow this popsicle stand."

Jedi stood, rolling his shoulders and nursing some bruises. "You're telling me. I feel like a piece of meat someone was tenderizing for dinner. Good thing there aren't any broken bones… I think. I'm pretty sure. Well, maybe my nose…"

Evie helped pull Sketchers to his feet and the man groaned. "Speak for yourself. I have NEVER hurt so bad in my LIFE. Why do I hang out with you people?"

Jedi chuckled, patting Sketchers on the shoulder. "Because if you didn't, you'd be dead many, many times over. Now, let's get some gear and get out of here. I still dunno how all this ruckus started in the camp."

Marie and Evie looked at each other and shifted awkwardly. They certainly had a guess as to why the camp was under attack and by whom. Sighing, Marie pulled out another knife. She had been pleased to find that the ones she had left hadn't been put very far away.

Twirling her blades, she watched people running by, panicked, fleeing from whatever force was slaughtering them viciously. Then there was a familiar voice that, when they turned to look, was matched to an equally familiar face.

"Stop running, you pansy bitches! They're wrecking camp! You fucking fuckers! Get back here and fight!"

Marie's face darkened. She gazed over at Evie, who was bandaging some of Sketchers' injuries. Evie looked up, nodding. She had heard him. Standing, Evie came towards Marie. Jedi grabbed Sketchers and began pulling him away. "Don't worry about us, girls. We'll wait for you outside of camp."

Marie popped her knuckles, then her wrists and neck as she walked slowly towards Dingo, who was still desperately trying to maintain order.

But, a flicker of movement distracted Marie and Evie from their task. Turning, they watched as the one wreaking havoc in the camp uncloaked. There, with a bloody spear, was Bravo.

Marie frowned. "Bravo. Go away. We've got stuff to do. And we're still mad at Martello and Ninja!"

Bravo quirked his head, then waved a hand back in the direction of the caves. Crossing her arms, Marie gave him her meanest look. "Now, you listen to ME. Evie and I have gotten nothing but crap from that guy over there, and we fully intend to finish this before he can start it again. THEN we may consider going back."

Bravo 's shoulders slumped and he gestured helplessly towards the caves' direction once more. Marie shook her head. "No. Look, if you want to be helpful, make sure those two guys don't end up dead. We like them. They're friends of ours. Got it? DON'T. KILL. THEM."

Bravo looked at the mildly terrified men Marie was pointing at, and nodded. Walking over to the men, he stared down at them a moment before turning his back to them and taking a guard position. Giving a sharp nod to Evie and Marie, he recloaked.

Marie sighed and Evie turned to Jedi. "Look, just stay put, okay? Bravo will keep you safe. We'll be back as soon as we put this to rest.

Jedi blinked, but waved at the girls. "Well, you go on then. Come back. And good luck. Dingo is a wily one."

Marie snorted and turned, following the sound of Dingo's shouts. "Believe you me, we knew that fact already. This time, he's done for."

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Marie watched Dingo carefully. He had probably three guys with him, trying to restore order. Evie crouched next to Marie, holding a wooden tent pole in her hand. She had grabbed it on the way to get Dingo. Not the best weapon, but it would do.

The girls nodded to each other, splitting off. Marie went to the front of Dingo's group and waited to spot Evie in position. When she saw Evie waving to her, she smiled. It was time to get this party started.

With a shout, Marie charged forward, drawing the attention of Dingo's remaining men. They all turned, focusing their fire while Marie dodged and darted away, slipping behind some trees. The men ran after her, trying to take her out before she could cause any more trouble.

Dingo watched this, suspicious. The crazy bitch would be done for. Those were his best men. No way could she take out all of them. But, the other one…

Before Dingo could think further, Evie swept in from behind, whipping her staff down and around, knocking Dingo off of his feet. Before she could bring the pole down onto his head, he rolled and scrambled to stand, turning and glaring at her.

Evie frowned. Then, she bared her teeth in a snarl that Marie would have been proud of. "DINGO! We're finishing this. Either I die, or I take your head back to camp on this stick!"

Dingo smiled, pulling out a revolver. He aimed it towards Evie's torso carefully. "I am going to enjoy blowing a new hole in you, sweetheart!"

Evie just smiled back. "Only if you can hit me, dumb shit."

Dingo frowned, then pulled the trigger. But, Evie was already on the move. Living with the alien warriors certainly had its perks. After keeping up with them for a few months, Dingo was nothing if not slow and inefficient.

Dingo fired off a few rounds before noticing Evie had moved, charging towards him. Pulling the gun around, he fired more, snarling. He HAD to have hit her this time.

Only not. Evie was closer, bearing down on him, death in her eyes. This wasn't what he had expected. Whipping the weapon around once more, he squeezed the trigger. An ominous click sounded. He stared down at his gun, then cursed. He'd forgotten to keep track of how many shots he had left. He was out.

He ran from Evie, trying to reload. Evie would have none of it. Making her way around him, she aimed her stick and swung, slamming it into his wrist, sending the gun flying. The jostling also made him drop his ammo and he stepped back in time to avoid another blow. Cursing, Dingo pulled out the bowie knife strapped to his thigh. "Goddamn you, bitch! I'm going to stick you then watch you bleed out like a deer!"

Evie laughed. "I'd like to see you try, pig. You haven't lived up to any of your threats so far! You're just a sad little man who can't do anything but be a bully. Not attractive, I must say."

With a bellow, Dingo charged, blade at the ready. Evie crouched, staff still. This was where things got tough.

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Marie dodged behind another tree, barely avoiding a bullet to the brain. Cursing, she stayed low, circling the camp. She'd been in the trees for awhile now and she still hadn't lost them. They were more tenacious than she'd given them credit for.

Then, an idea formed in her brain. Smiling, she sprinted into the camp. Darting around the debris, as gunfire ricocheted around her. Finally, she spotted what she wanted. Running by Jedi and Sketchers, she called out to Bravo in the small amount of their language she had managed to pick up. "Bravo! Kill three! There!"

And on she went. Mere seconds later, she heard the death cries of the men that had been stalking her and the bullets stopped flying. Grinning, she made a sharp turn and sprinted for where Evie was fighting against Dingo, mano a mano.

Pulling out two of her knives, she readied herself. She couldn't WAIT to put Dingo out, once and for all.

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Evie hoped Marie would come back soon. She'd been standing up pretty well to Dingo so far, but her staff was close to being done for. He'd been making good head way with his bowie knife, taking chunks out of it, trying to get her defenseless.

Glaring hard, Evie gauged where his next strike would fall. Instead of risking breaking her weapon, she dodged, landing a solid hit to his side. He grunted in pain, but recovered quickly, swinging the blade. Evie danced backwards, her shirt getting caught in the knife's path, but nothing more.

As Dingo turned to face her once more, the sound of rapid footsteps became louder. Dingo's eyes widened and he turned, barely blocking Marie's initial strike. Marie jumped back, readying her stance again.

Marie and Evie both circled Dingo and he stared at them, eyes panicked. Marie smiled sweetly. "What's wrong, Dingo? Don't you like being in the middle?"

Dingo was less than amused. "Shut up, you damned crazy bitch! I don't need to take crap from traitors!"

Marie quirked her head. "Traitors? To whom? Evie and I have always been on the same side. OURS."

Dingo laughed. "Bullshit! You're traitors to the human race! Being with those alien FREAKS. We were just trying to civilize you up again."

Marie stared at him, then began laughing hysterically. Dingo frowned, getting angrier and angrier. "WHAT'S SO DAMNED FUNNY?"

Wiping her eyes, Marie stood straight again. "First of all, we are the human SPECIES. Not race. Second, why should we care if we betray other humans? They'd do the same to us. Third, I find that I don't LIKE most humans now a days. And fourth, rape doesn't count as civilizing."

Twirling her blades casually, Marie continued. "Besides, at least those alien bastards aren't NEARLY as ugly as YOU, Hobo face."

Dingo snapped. With an enraged howl, he charged her, knife swinging. Marie grinned, and the duel began.

Knives whipped through the air, singing as they slashed by. Dingo sliced through Marie's arm, she returned with two cuts across his torso. Back and forth, each one giving the other a few more cuts, but never enough to kill, which disappointed both of the knife wielders deeply.

Evie would occasionally but in and smack Dingo in the head, the back, or the shin. But, those blows were fleeting, and more to distract him than anything.

After some time, Marie and Dingo faced each other, breathing heavily and bleeding all over. Marie straightened and nodded to Evie. It was time to end this. Dingo failed to notice the silent communication between the women as he charged forward again, hoping to knock Marie off balance and over power her.

Marie set her stance and she locked blades with Dingo. He smiled down as he tried to force her to the ground. "This is the END, Psycho bitch! Sorry we couldn't go another round in bed together."

Evie charged in and slammed the staff as hard as she could into his lower back, breaking the stick in the process. Howling in pan, Dingo whipped around, trying to grab the now unarmed Evie, to use as a potential hostage.

As soon as his back was turned, Marie went in with both knives. Before Dingo could even touch Evie, Marie had lodged both blades deep into his back, past his ribs, puncturing both of Dingo's lungs. She had been waiting for this a long time.

Dingo coughed as Marie withdrew her blades and wiped them clean. Stumbling forward, he fell to his knees in front of Evie. Evie smiled, crouching down to look him in the eye. "Honey, you NEVER went a round with us."

Marie pushed him forward from behind, accelerating his delayed, drawn out fall. He was panting, desperately trying to fill his torn lungs with air. Looking up, he saw both of them, laughing at him. Evie turned to walk away and Marie waved, going to follow.

Marie looked back at the panting man on the ground, hacking up blood and smiled. Calling back, Marie went for one last dig. "Besides, you were always too late to party, anyway."

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Marie and Evie strolled up, feeling much lighter. As they padded up to where they left Jedi, Sketchers, and Bravo, they found a scene of mild chaos.

Sketchers was on the ground, passed out with a puddle of vomit nearby. Jedi was standing over him in a protective stance, carefully watching as Bravo tore the skull and spine out of the second of the guards he had killed.

As he busily polished the skull clean of hair, skin and muscle, Marie glowered at him and Evie went to talk to Jedi. Jedi smiled wanly at her as she approached. "Hey there, girl. How'd it go?"

Evie smiled. "Fabulously!"

"He dead?"

Marie called over. "Only if he can somehow magically heal two punctured lungs! In which case, he's much tougher than originally thought and we should probably hack out his heart or brain or something."

Evie gasped. "His head! Oh, I said I would take it back on a stake! I should go back and do that. Can I borrow a knife, Marie? A big one. Gotta get through the neck."

As Marie began to rummage through her clothes for a knife best suited to hacking off a head, Jedi waved his hand. "No! Nonono, that's fine. I'm sure he'll be dead. Very dead. Soon. No need to hack off anything!"

As he said this, a disgusting slurping, squelching noise came from Bravo's direction. Everyone turned to look at him. He paused, realizing he was being stared at, with the skull and spine only partially removed.

Evie crossed her arms as Marie giggled. "Bravo! Really. We have GUESTS. Go take that elsewhere. Look! You've already made one of them ill. Shoo, and come back when you're done."

Bravo quirked his head at her, then shrugged and walked off behind a small patch of trees. The squelching noise resounded once again and Jedi made a strange urping sound, clearly trying not to hurl. Evie hollered after Bravo. "WE CAN STILL HEAR YOU!"

A string of curses came from behind the trees and Bravo came stomping back out, shaking the spine and freshly cleaned skull at Evie, chattering grumpily. Evie sniffed and waved him off, turning to tend to Sketchers and explaining things to Jedi.

After a very short and not so sweet explanation, Jedi looked worried and amused. "So, what are we going to do now, girly?"

Evie sighed. "Well, maybe you two should just head on towards that caravan. Scavenge what you can here, then move on. We have unfinished business back in the caves."

Jedi shook his head, reaching down to sling Sketchers over his shoulders. "No way. We're sticking with you. Friends are friends, and it's hard to find good friends in this world. We're with you, all the way."

Evie smiled and nodded. "Then let's get going. Got places to be, aliens to placate. Come on, Marie. Bravo. It's time to go."

Bravo stood there awkwardly, clutching the skull in his hands, looking down at it, sulking. Marie patted his arm. "It's okay. I think it's a lovely trophy. Good job."

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Bravo had led them back quickly and had ushered the humans deep into the caves with ease. Marie and Evie kept their long strides going, but Jedi and Sketchers, who woke up eventually, had a hard time keeping up. As they reached the main cave, Jedi sucked in a gasp.

He hadn't really understood just how MANY of these things there were. All of them just about as big as the one Marie and Evie called Bravo. How had the girls LIVED with them for months? How were they not DEAD?

Marie and Evie were nonplussed. The warriors could strut and pose all they liked. Together, they were unstoppable. And the aliens had better not forget it.

Bravo took them through the cave, then darted off, leaving the humans on their own. Evie yelled after him "Hey! You jerk! Get back here! I can't BELIEVE he just DITCHED us!"

Marie shrugged. "We know where we're going anyway, and it isn't the first time. Come on."

They made their way to the Elder's cave. In the cave, Faith, Marnie and Alex lounged on pillows, nibbling on some food. They looked up and squealed. As a collective, they swarmed Evie and Marie. "You're back! We missed you! We thought you didn't like us anymore! Why did you leave?"

After a moment, the three left Marie and Evie, mobbing Sketchers. "Ooo, he's so CUTE! And awkward! Love awkward cutie pies!"

Jedi laughed at the look of confused horror on Sketchers' face. "Well, buddy, you are hitting the mother lode. Good job! I'm so proud."

Suddenly, a rumble filled the cave. The Elder had arrived. Jedi took a step away from the three women and put his hands in his pockets, trying to appear as non threatening as possible. Sketchers looked about ready to faint again. The three girls were non plussed.

The Elder finally shooed the girls off of Sketchers, mildly disgruntled that they had failed in their one duty, to shake his cape so he could make grand entrances. After he had them occupied with something else, the Elder looked down at Evie and Marie, crossing his arms.

He began speaking then. He asked why they had left. Marie took charge. "We had unfinished business to attend to."

Elder Pimp looked unimpressed. Marie shrugged. "And we had some bad run ins with Martello and Ninja. We'll work it out later."

The Elder nodded, then pointed towards Jedi and Sketchers, asking about them. Marie shrugged. "They're allies. Friends. Partners. Don't hurt them. They're under OUR protection."

Elder Pimp contemplated this, then nodded. He told them that he would tend to them further later, but he had something very pressing to worry about. Marie and Evie nodded, then left, Jedi and Sketchers trailing behind them.

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After settling Jedi and Sketchers in one of the side caves, Marie and Evie busily discussed the events of the past few days and the next steps they would take. Suddenly, Martello and Ninja came running in, panting.

The girls looked up and blinked, finally Marie waved. Martello went over and knelt next to her, playing a familiar recording. "Friends?"

Marie smiled. "Yes, we're still friends. We're still mad at you, but friends forgive each other. But, you two have to sleep out here now. Jedi and Sketchers are in that room. Don't go there."

Ninja growled and Martello quirked his head. Marie pointed to the side cave. "They're friends of ours. We're taking care of them. Don't hurt them, got it?"

Martello and Ninja peered into the shadowy nook, where Sketchers cowered away from them and Jedi gave an awkward smile, waving. The two warriors looked back to the women. Marie raised an eyebrow. "You got something to say?"

Martello shook his head and sat down grumpily. Ninja stood in the corner, watching Evie. She pretended not to notice. Awkward silence reigned over them all.

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Awhile after the introductions, Marnie came skipping in. "HIIIII! So, Hotrod is ready to talk to you now. And bring the cuties! I mean, the people we're not supposed to molest. Ever."

Marie and Evie nodded. Marie called out to them. "Hey! Boys! Come on. We've got a meeting with the big boss. Time to go strut our stuff."

Jedi walked out, looking remarkably calm. "But, I'm terrible at my catwalk walk. I haven't practiced in such a long time."

Marie chuckled. "Well, practice on the way over. I'm sure the aliens will enjoy the view. Or, maybe not."

The four followed Marnie back across the main cavern. All the eyes of the warriors were on them. It was mildly unnerving.

They escaped the stares as they went in front of the Elder once more. He nodded to them and gestured for them to sit. As soon as everyone was settled, the Elder began. He wanted to allow them on their hunt for the Queen.

This would prove, in front of the other warriors, that they were warriors in their own right. He didn't expect or want them to help take down the Queen. Just to keep the drones at bay, proving they could best the Xenomorphs in a battle. THAT is what would impress the others.

He said he would understand if they wanted to back out. They would still be protected. But, the safest they could be was as equals among the fighters. Marie, Evie, Jedi and Sketchers took this all in calmly, contemplating.

Sketchers was terrified. But, he would go along with whatever Jedi said. Jedi had kept him alive this long. Jedi shrugged. It was worth a try. And it's not like he wasn't used to doing it anyway. Marie and Evie smiled, nodding. They'd been waiting for this chance to prove themselves.

The hunt would begin soon. They had to prepare. Going back to the sleeping caverns, the four humans gathered their weapons and ammunition, things they had scavenged from the camp before their return.

The call went out. Taking a deep breath, Marie and Evie gazed at each other, then at Jedi and Sketchers. It was now, or never.

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Author's End Note: We are shocked and appalled that you people thought Dingo had just died somewhere. Honestly. What kind of authors do you think we are? We don't leave threads like that hanging. OBVIOUSLY Marie and Evie were going to kill him. Eventually. It just took awhile. We expected better from you. Harumph.

And thanks for the Tvrtko hugs! Every time we manage to pin him down, we give him one. He'll get better eventually.