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Hearts Astray
Chapter 19
As Voyager made the hour journey to Starbase FX-10, Kathryn sat alone in her ready room, gazing out at the stars, and tried to come to terms with the night's events. It all felt surreal, somehow, like a dream that had become a nightmare. Many times over the last seven years they had come close to getting home, and had been in a similar situation four years ago when they had found themselves in 1996, but never had they actually got home only to find that they weren't really home after all. It was a cruel twist of fate and every crew member was feeling it acutely. What would happen now was anyone's guess. Perhaps the anomaly would realize its mistake and reappear; perhaps the elusive time police would correct their displacement; perhaps they would all just simply fade from time and none of this would happen; or perhaps Starfleet Command would come up with a solution. But whatever was going to happen, Kathryn had to be strong and focussed. Her crew were depending on her.
Suddenly, the door chime played, bringing Kathryn out of her thoughts. She turned away from the window and called out.
"Come in!"
The doors opened and Chakotay came in.
"Hi," he said. "How are you holding up?"
"I'm fine," she answered. "The crew?"
"Disappointed, but optimistic. Their hope is the anomaly will show up before we reach the starbase and make another wormhole that will send us to the right place."
"I've been hoping that too," Kathryn replied. "But the more time that passes, and the closer we get to the starbase, the less I think it's likely. As Seven said, the anomaly's attempts at helping us have been haphazard. It may be totally ignorant of the mistake. But it tried to help us, tried its very best, and we have to be grateful for that."
"Absolutely. And let's not assume its depositing us here was a mistake. Maybe we're here for a reason."
"Such as?"
"I don't know, and maybe we'll never know, but that doesn't mean there isn't one."
"I suppose you're right. The future is the past, the past is the future, and...I need a coffee." She got up and made her way over to the replicator. "Want one?"
"Please. Apart from my brief sojourn in sickbay, I've been up for twenty hours. I need the caffeine."
"Then I'll make yours extra strong," Kathryn smiled. She then replicated the coffees and carried them over to her coffee table. Chakotay picked up his and then sat beside her on the couch.
"What do you think will happen," he asked, "when we get to the starbase?"
"I don't know exactly. Our arrival will obviously be top secret so there won't be much of a welcome. We'll probably be told to dock Voyager in a high security bay and then we'll either be escorted somewhere or officials will transport onboard. What happens then will depend on what Starfleet Command has decided. We won't have much say in the matter."
"Not exactly the welcome home we've been waiting for."
"No, far from it."
Chakotay took a sip of coffee. "Have you ever been to this starbase?"
"Yes, many times. It's mainly a research facility now, though it does do emergency ship repairs, and I've attended a number of conferences there. You?"
"Not that I can remember. But I've been to many starbases over the years, so maybe I have."
"Probably. It's hardly memorable as looks like all the others of its age." She paused. "I haven't said anything to the crew, not yet, but I've got a good idea what Starfleet's solution will be."
"Stasis?" Chakotay offered.
"Yes," she replied. "If Voyager is kept secretly at this starbase for eight years, and us in stasis inside, then there's a good chance that history will be preserved. Those who know of our premature return will be few in number and will not be allowed to discuss what they know with anyone. Our case will be classified. That means all those involved in trying to get us home, including Admiral Paris, will be ignorant of the fact that we already are." She paused. "If that happens, if history is preserved, then the irony is...it's unfathomable. For seven years we will have struggled against the odds to get home, and yet the whole time we already were."
"It does stagger the mind," Chakotay said. "But I agree. It is most likely what Starfleet Command will decide. What else is there?"
Kathryn turned to the window and gazed out. "While I've been sitting here, thinking, I've been thinking about our younger-selves. They're out there somewhere, going about their ordinary lives, with no idea of what will happen in a year's time. I'm thinking of Joe Carey, Lyndsay Ballard, Ahni Jetal, and all the other people who would still be alive now if we hadn't of got pulled to the delta quadrant. All it would take is one message to stop it all, one message to my younger-self to tell her to avoid the Badlands and why. And yet, I can't do it. Every time I'm tempted, I think of what Tom and B'Elanna said in the briefing room earlier. I think of Seven and Icheb and Neelix. For seven years I've done my best to uphold Starfleet principles in the most difficult of situations, and I need to uphold them now. The temporal prime directive exists because we don't have the right to choose who should live and who should die. And I can't choose. I can't choose between Joe Carey's life and Seven's liberation from the Borg. I don't have that right."
"No," Chakotay said. "None of us do. We have to accept our fates, have to respect the laws of time. And I'm glad that, so far, no one has suggested we don't. What we've all experienced over the passed seven years has been beyond anything we could imagine. We've visited worlds we didn't know existed, seen things that challenge our understanding of what we know, met incredible people and hundreds of different races, and seen things that no one else has ever seen. Although our journey hasn't always been easy, and we've lost people along the way, I don't think there's anyone onboard who would not want the journey to happen. Every starship suffers casualties. We've lost no more people than an average starship does. Probably less because we've had an amazing captain." He paused. "I didn't always agree with your decisions, and we've had our disagreements, but I've always respected your judgment and have always felt privileged to be your First Officer. You're the most dedicated, intelligent, compassionate, brave and disciplined captain I've ever served under. There are few officers in the history of Starfleet like you and I'm proud of all you've achieved."
Kathryn took his hand in hers. "I'm proud of you too, Chakotay. You've been a fine First Officer, the best any captain could ever have, and you've been a good friend. My best friend. I don't know if I could have got through the hard times without you. There were times when I wanted to give up, when I didn't want to live anymore, the guilt and the burden on my shoulders were too great. But whenever I felt that way, whenever I offered to do something crazy, you were always there to hold me back. We got through those years together, Chakotay, and whatever happens now, whatever becomes of us, we'll face it together."
Chakotay squeezed her hand and was about to speak, only Tuvok did so over the comm.
"Tuvok to Captain Janeway. We will arrive at Starbase FX-10 in approximately ten minutes."
"Acknowledged," Kathryn answered. As the connection closed, she got to her feet. "We started our journey home side by side. Let's end it that way. Let's be sitting side by side on our bridge as we dock."
Chakotay got to his feet and gently placed his hand on her shoulder. "There's no where else I'd rather be."
Sitting next to each other on the bridge, just as they had done that first day they set a course for home, Kathryn and Chakotay watched on the viewscreen as Voyager approached Starbase FX-10. It was a large starbase, of typical spherical design, and looked rather like a ghost station as they closed in on it. There were no visible lights and no ships coming and going.
"Are you sure this is the right place, Tom?" Harry asked. "Looks deserted to me."
"Definitely the right place," he answered. "Starbase FX-10, the most happening place in the galaxy."
"Tom's right," Kathryn confirmed. "This is Starbase FX-10. It's not used for much these days so most of it is empty."
"I don't like the sound of that," Harry declared. "In fact, I've got a bad feeling about this. I don't think we should go there. If we do, who knows what they'll do with us. Maybe they'll put us in an execution chamber or lock us up."
"Lock us up, maybe," Tom said, "but an execution chamber? Come on, Harry! What have you been reading? A Cardassian guide to Starfleet?"
"But they might," Harry insisted. "We're not meant to be in this time-frame. Our younger-selves are the ones who are and there can't be two of us. Starfleet Command won't be able to send us back so what can they do with us? Euthanasia, that's what."
"And in eight years time," Tom argued, "when Voyager disappears from the face of the galaxy, what are they going to do then? Resurrect us? We're part of a temporal loop, Harry. They can't just kill us."
"But..." Harry protested.
"No buts," Kathryn interrupted. "Tom's right. No one's going to kill us. Put such an idea right out of your head. At worst, what we're looking at is eight years of stasis."
Suddenly, there was a bleep.
"We are receiving an incoming transmission," Tuvok declared. "Audio only."
Kathryn got to her feet. "Let us hear it."
In seconds, a male voice filled the bridge. "Starship Voyager, please dock in bay 15. The bay's co-ordinates have been transmitted with this message. Please confirm receipt."
Kathryn glanced at Tuvok. "Do we have it, Tuvok?"
"Affirmative," he answered.
"Then acknowledge receipt and send co-ordinates to the helm."
Tuvok did both in seconds and the male voice spoke again. "Receipt confirmed. Please proceed to bay 15."
The connection closed and Kathryn turned to Tom as she sat again. "Take us in, Mr Paris."
Tom did as she said and flew Voyager to the designated bay. As they approached it, the bay's doors opened, flashing red as they did, and Voyager slowly flew in. Then, for the first time in seven years, the great starship docked at a Starfleet port. Everyone on the bridge felt the magnitude of the moment, but before they had time to absorb it, they were hailed.
"On screen," Kathryn said.
Instantly, the face of an elderly black woman appeared.
"Welcome to Starbase FX-10," she said. "I'm Admiral Jenni Klare and I've been placed in charge of this case by Starfleet Command. I will now beam onboard with my colleagues, so we can confer in person, but first I would like to extend my condolences to you all. After finally making it home after being lost in space for so long, only to find out you're in the wrong year, must be devastating. But we have a solution that will, we hope, take some of the sting out of your disappointment."
"Thank you for your sympathy," Kathryn answered. "We are indeed disappointed at our displacement. Getting home has been our one goal for seven years and we have suffered many hardships, braved many dangers, to achieve it. However, we have every faith that all will be well. Starfleet principles have been our guiding force for seven years and we trust in those principles now."
"And rightly so. Meet us in your ready room, Captain. We will transport there."
The viewscreen then went blank and Kathryn turned to her officers.
"Chakotay, you come with me. Tuvok, you have the bridge."
Kathryn then made her way to her ready room and Chakotay followed.
It took Admiral Klare and her colleagues a few minutes to arrive in the ready room, but when they did, Kathryn and Chakotay were waiting for them. With the Admiral was a small, stout, man with white hair and a tall woman with short blonde hair.
"Welcome aboard," Kathryn said when they materialized. "If you are do not know our names, I'm Captain Kathryn Janeway and this is my First Officer, Commander Chakotay."
"It is an honor to meet you both," Admiral Klare smiled. "This is Admiral Ryan Lott, and this is Admiral Anne Parker."
They all shook hands and then Admiral Lott spoke. "The situation that we find ourselves in is most unusual, but it is not unprecedented. You are not the first crew to find yourselves displaced in time with no obvious way back to your time-frame. More often than not these displacements fix themselves, one way or another, but on rare occasions they do not and are permanent. That is because they are meant to happen. They are a part of our history or our future. As you have no way back to your time-frame, and the universe does not seem to be treating your displacement as an aberration of the space time continuum, we can only conclude that your displacement is permanent. That means it is meant to happen, is a part of the past that leads to your future. If the future you come from no longer exists, then our present understanding of temporal mechanics tells us that you would no longer exist. In other words, we wouldn't be having this conversation. But as we are having this conversation, then your future still exists and will happen. This means our priority now is to safeguard that future and preserve history."
"After much deliberation," Admiral Parker continued, "we have concluded that secretly putting you in stasis for the next eight years is the best course of action. It will preserve you as you are and then, on the stardate and time that you flew through the wormhole that brought you here, we will awake you. Then you will be able to have the homecoming you deserve."
"We hope you agree that this is the best thing to do," Admiral Klare said, "and will co operate."
"We will," Kathryn answered. "It is the best solution all around and one we expected you to put to us."
Admiral Klare smiled, her relief visible. "Then let's get on with it. The sooner you are asleep, the sooner you will awake to your future."
Chakotay spoke now. "Where will you keep us? On Voyager or somewhere else?"
"On Voyager," she replied, "providing there is enough space for all the chambers we will need. That will make it easier for us to keep your presence a secret from the station's residents."
"There's plenty of space on deck 14," Kathryn said. "In fact, we already have stasis chambers set up there. We set them up when..."
The woman raised her hand. "You must tell me nothing of your history beyond the time and date of your entry into the wormhole. The less we know, the better."
"Understood," Kathryn said.
The youngest admiral, Admiral Parker, put her hand on Kathryn's shoulder. "It will take us some time to check and prepare all the chambers. Three hours at least. This should be ample time for you to inform your crew and answer any concerns they may have. But we must stress the importance of adhering to the temporal prime directive. Just one violation, no matter how small, could re-write history. Your crew must not, no matter how tempting, contact friends or loved ones to let them know they are ok."
"They will not," Kathryn said. "I give you my word. I give all of you my word."
Admiral Klare smiled. "And we trust it."
While the stasis chambers were checked and prepared on deck 14, Kathryn summoned her crew to holodeck 1 and, with Chakotay at her side, spoke to them.
"Many times over the last seven years," she said, "we have gathered here as a crew, and as a family, to celebrate a triumph or to comfort each other in sorrow. Today, we are here to do both. For seven years we have struggled against the odds to get home, every single one of you showing a bravery beyond my furthest expectations, and while we have accomplished our goal, our victory is bittersweet. We have got home, despite all the obstacles against us, but we have got home too early. As rumor flies around this ship at warp speed, you have all no doubt heard that a solution to our displacement has been found, and that the solution is stasis. It is the only realistic solution available to us and one I know we will all embrace. I know many of you were hoping that the anomaly would reappear and provide us with another wormhole that would lead us to our own time-frame, but, for whatever reason, it has not. Perhaps because it is unaware of our displacement, or perhaps because we are meant to be in this time-frame. But, whatever the reason, the anomaly did its very best to help us, and I know we are all grateful for that."
"Amen!" B'Elanna and a few others shouted.
"As you will remember," Kathryn continued, "four years ago we all had to go into stasis to travel safely through a radioactive nebula. We set up stasis chambers on deck 14 and they remain there to this day. Providing they are all in working order, we will again use them. For eight years we will sleep on deck 14, carefully monitored every day, and on the exact same day, at the exact same time, as we entered the wormhole that brought us here, we will be awoken. In what will seem like the blink of an eye to us, eight years will have passed. In those eight years, our lives will happen exactly as we remember them, and no one, only a few select officers, will know we are here sleeping. When we awake, the Federation will be told of our return and we'll be reunited with our loved ones. Of course, eight years is a long time to be in stasis, and there are no absolute guarantees that all will go well, but I fully believe this will be a success. I fully believe that we will, in what will only seem like a few hours from now to us, be reunited with our loved ones. So, now that we have comforted each other in our sorrow, let's celebrate our triumph. Because we've done it. After seven grueling, yet incredible years, we've reached our destination. Home. If Neelix was with us now, he would throw the biggest party the alpha quadrant has ever seen, but as he's not, let's do it on his behalf. Right as I speak, a feast is being prepared by Seven and Tom in the mess hall, and the party will begin as soon as I'm finished. So, unless there are any questions, I'll wind this up and invite you all to follow me to the mess hall."
"I have a question," The Doctor said. "While you are all in stasis, what is to become of me? Am I to be deactivated for eight years?"
"To put it plainly, yes, Doctor," Kathryn answered. "For the next eight years, Voyager is to become a time-capsule. Everything will be preserved exactly as it is. Time will stand still here."
"Gives me the creeps," Harry said. "But if it has to be done, I guess it has to be done."
Naomi stepped forward now. "I think it's awesome," she declared. "Like being in Sleeping Beauty! They all slept for a hundred years. Eight is nothing!"
"That's the spirit," Kathryn smiled. "Now, are there any more questions?"
The answering silence told her there were none.
"Then let's not hang around here anymore," she said. "Let's get ourselves to the mess hall and make merry!"
When the celebrations were over, and the stasis chambers were ready, it was time for the crew to be put to sleep. They all gathered in holodeck 1, from where they were taken one by one to deck 14, and after an hour only senior officers were left. Then all senior officers were taken too and only Voyager's Captain and First Officer remained.
"Well," Kathryn said as the holodeck's doors shut them in alone, "looks like this is it."
"Yes," Chakotay replied.
"I didn't want to alarm the crew, as we have no option but to go into stasis, but we both know that the risks are higher than what we've been told and that we've admitted to the crew. Not only does going into long term stasis carry risks by itself, but anything could happen in eight years. Our presence might be discovered, with who knows what consequence, or this station might suffer a disaster or attack. Some of us, or all of us, might not make it. This might be the last time we ever see each other." Tears filled her eyes. "So, before we're called, there's something I want to tell you. I want you to know that..."
But before she could finish her words, the holodeck's doors opened again and Admiral Parker came in. "Commander Chakotay," she said, "we are ready for you."
Chakotay looked at Kathryn with regret, his longing to finish their conversation a visible ache, but he gave a brave smile and put his hand on her shoulder. "See you in the future."
Kathryn nodded. "In the future."
For a long moment their eyes locked, neither wanting to part, but then Chakotay broke their connection and walked away. As he did, Kathryn watched him go with unshed tears stinging her eyes. She had wanted to tell him, before they were put to what could be a sleep of death, that she remembered everything that had happened on New Earth, that it was real. Now it was too late. Perhaps forever. Perhaps he would die never knowing the truth.
But no, she had to shake off any doubts that were plaguing her. 'Operation Stasis', as it had become known, would be a success. In eight years time, on stardate 55215.1 at 02:33 hours, they would all awake to their long awaited homecoming, and all would be well.
Then, all too soon, it was her time to go into stasis. Admiral Klare came for her, took her to deck 14 where her crew were already asleep, and showed her to the last empty stasis chamber. Kathryn bravely climbed in, lay herself down, and the glass lid slid over her. As she closed her tired eyes, she hoped with every part of her being that when she opened them again, if she opened them again, the future they came from would once again be the present.
END OF CHAPTER 19