Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own anything.

A/N: I know the previous chapter's cliffhanger took everyone by surprise last week, but I thought in keeping with Susan's character it fit well in the story. Anyways, I just wanted to say thank you for all of your continued support and I hope you'll enjoy this chapter.

Chapter Five: Matters of the Heart

"I… I don't understand…" Caspian breathed out after the initial shock of Susan's last words finally sunk in. "Why do you want me to choose Lilliandil without doing what Aslan asks first?"

"I am afraid I do not follow either, my Queen," the Star added softly. "Why do you think he should choose me over you? Compared to you, he barely knows me."

"Because it's the right choice," the brunette replied. "Lilliandil, you are a beautiful, kind-hearted and intelligent young woman. I can see how much Caspian cares for you, and I have no doubt that you will make a wonderful Queen of Narnia, just as I'm sure Aslan thinks you will."

"But that's not the whole reason why you believe she should become my queen instead of you, is it?" Caspian questioned her in a firmer tone than before, his eyes pinned on her like a hawk gazing at its prey in the sky. "There's something you're not telling us."

"It's the only thing you need to know," Susan retorted, as she began stepping away from them. "I need to leave. Excuse me."

The handsome yet melancholy king watched as his first love left the courtyard quietly. Unsure of what to do, he remained standing by Lilliandil's side until she finally spoke up again.

"We have much to discuss, Your Majesty, but right now Queen Susan needs you. Go to her and find out what is really troubling her. I will be ready to speak with you whenever you are ready to see me again."

"You are most kind, Lady Lilliandil," he gently bowed his head. Taking her hand into his own, Caspian planted a light kiss on her knuckles, then added, "I won't be long."

The beautiful Star smiled upon hearing this and nodded, watching as the young king exited the small courtyard to search for Susan.

"Good luck."

Walking through the long corridors of the castle, Caspian finally made it to Susan's private bedchambers, expecting to find her there. He knocked on her door, but when no response came, he decided to check for himself and see if she was in her room or not. Taking a quick look inside, Caspian saw that no one was inside. He was just about the close the door and leave to ask the guards where she went, when he suddenly heard someone softly crying out on the balcony. Knowing it was Susan, the worried king opened the door all the way this time and let himself in, gently closing it behind him. Then, after he quietly walked across her bedroom, Caspian found the eldest Pevensie girl sobbing and wiping each tear that slid down her cheeks. Even though her back was facing him, it broke his heart to see his beloved Susan crying. He wanted nothing more than to take her into his arms, dry her tears, and tell her everything was going to be all right. But he couldn't do that—he couldn't say everything was going to be all right when he didn't even know what the future held for them. Susan was with him now, still within arm's length, but how long would that last? For the rest of their lives if he chose her over Lilliandil, he reminded himself.

"I'm sorry for the pain I have caused you, my love," he apologized with remorse, revealing his presence to the Gentle Queen after watching her cry for several moments.

Turning around to see him on her private balcony, she cried out his name and said, "What are you doing here?"

Her eyes were red and puffy from her crying, her cheeks were pink and tearstained, but despite her upset, she was still the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

"I never meant to hurt you."

"Well, you finally got around to it anyway, didn't you?"

Caspian hadn't seen her cross with him since the day he and Peter almost brought the White Witch back from the dead. He couldn't stand seeing her this way, for someone as beautiful as Susan should never be so sad.

"My feelings for Lilliandil—"

"Lilliandil isn't the problem here, Caspian," she snapped at him before he could finish. "It's you. You lied to me."

"But I never said—"

"A lie by omission is still a lie. You knew Aslan was sending Lilliandil and I here so you could choose between us, but you didn't tell me that when I asked you last night. And if you weren't honest with me then, how am I supposed to trust you now?"

"You have every right in the world to be me angry with me, I know that. But you can't use your anger over what I have done and think I am not going to see that you're doing the exact same thing to me."

Infuriated by his accurate accusation, she refused to say anything in reply, turned her heels, and left the balcony to go back into her bedchambers.

Following her, he continued to press her for the truth. "You cannot run away from this like the way Peter chased off your suitors, Susan. We have to face this situation together."

She spun around to face him again with daggers in her cerulean blue eyes. "Face this situation together? Do you any idea what you've done, Caspian? For Merlin's sake, you've forced Lilliandil and I into—into a beauty contest to figure out which one of us is more fitted to be your future queen! You've cornered us into a love triangle where we had absolutely no say in the matter!"

"And if there was one part of this that I could go back and change, I never would have told Aslan that I have feelings for both of you."

"Don't you dare try and tell me you have no romantic feelings for Lilliandil when you've already admitted you do and I've seen the way you look at her."

"I would never do that," his eyes burning with passion. Seconds later, though, the Gentle Queen watched as his facial features suddenly softened and he raised his right hand to caress her cheek. "But I would be lying if I didn't say that a part of my heart still belongs to you. It has since the first moment we met, my love."

The sound of his tender voice lowering her defensive shields, Susan finally began to level with him. "Things are different now, Caspian. I shouldn't even be here anymore, and you've found someone new to love. Isn't that enough?"

"If I didn't still love you," he whispered softly, his face drawing closer to hers. "The problem is I do. I have never stopped loving you."

"I love you too…" she started to confess, "…but we have to face facts. We have to be strong and move on with our lives like we were doing before I came back."

"Move on? You mean, forget? Forget everything we've been through together? Forget everything we've meant to each other? Is that what you're asking me to do? To forget about you?"

"What difference does it make? If you choose Lilliandil, then I will return home and forget everything that took place while I was here anyway. Things will go back to the way they were, except you'll finally have a queen."

"Yes, but, unlike you, I will not have the luxury of forgetting everything that happened between us while you were here! My memories of you will not be erased, so no matter what happens, no matter who I ultimately choose to spend the rest of my life with, I will still love you. Until the day I die, Susan, I will love you!"

"Just leave me alone! Leave me alone and let me go home!"

Stepping away from him, the distraught queen covered her face with her hands and felt the tears come, unable to take another minute of their quarreling. She was trying to do what was best for both of them, and yet he refused to listen. Instead, he'd rather keep her in Narnia, where she and Lilliandil would be standing at opposite sides in his heart while he tried to choose between them, and she just couldn't deal with that. It was too much to bear.

"Please…" she whispered, uncovering her face to expose the tears that had begun falling down her cheeks. "Please, just go. Start a new life together with Lilliandil and be happy. I know she can make you happy, and that's what I want for you."

He walked up to her again, and when he was standing right in front of her, Susan averted her eyes so she couldn't look him directly in the eye. He refused to let her look away this time, though. Using his forefinger, he lifted her chin back up to meet his soulful gaze. One look into her crystal blue eyes, however, and Caspian found himself being drawn in by her beauty like a moth to the flame. Then in one swift but ever so gentle motion, his lips brushed hers, the kiss sending waves of pleasure throughout his body. Yet unlike their kisses from the night before, which were filled with urgency and yearning, this kiss was soft and sweet. It melted away all fear and anxiety, left everything they were previously arguing about in the dust. Both felt peace in one another's warm embrace; they felt safe and loved. It was a moment of pure bliss, a moment Caspian would have considered perfect until—

"No…" she abruptly pulled away before walking away from him. "This isn't right. We shouldn't be doing this."

"But we love each other."

"It doesn't matter. I won't betray Lilliandil like this. She's a sweet girl, someone worthy of becoming a Queen of Narnia. I am not going to allow you to hurt her just so you can share a fleeting moment of passion with me."

"We will feel…" he started, taking her back into his strong arms, "…it is more than just a fleeting moment of passion, Susan. It's love, and my love for you runs deeper than all the magic in Narnia combined."

"And what about your feelings for Lilliandil?"

"I…feel something for her too, yes, but it's—"

Shaking her head, Susan refused to listen to any more. "I can't do this."

The Gentle Queen brushed just past him in her destination for the door when the sound of his voice stopped her.

"I still want to know why you want me to choose Lilliandil over you."

"Does it really matter?" she questioned him with her back still facing him.

"Yes, it does matter, because if you are really willing to throw away everything we shared together during the Narnian Revolution, every moment we have shared together up to this point, I deserve to know why that is."

With tears now in her eyes, the brunette slowly turned around and whispered softly, "She deserves you more than I do."

"What?" he questioned her with a look of shock across his face. "How can you say that? How can you say that after everything you've done for Narnia and for your family? How can you say that after everything you did to help me claim my throne back from Miraz?"

"Because it's the truth," she replied as tears kept falling down her cheeks. "Lilliandil deserves you more than I do. She's the one you should be with."

Caspian couldn't believe his ears. Susan was actually sacrificing herself—sacrificing her love for him—because she thought someone else deserved him more and could make him happier than he would be with her. And while it almost broke his heart to think that she may really feel this way, it was most noble thing anyone had ever done for him.

"It is I who is unworthy of you …either of you, Your Majesty. I have been selfish and dishonest in my quest to keep you close when I should have been truthful from the very beginning. It's just…I've missed you so much these past three years. Both times I watched you and your siblings leave Narnia, it was as if a part of me died inside. Your family is the closest thing I've had to a real family. But when Aslan told me last night that he was bringing you back…and I kissed you, all was right again in the world. At least, until I remembered that I also needed to find Lilliandil. That was when I finally realized how much had changed since you left, for finding her was the only thing that mattered to me, and I felt guilty about that later on because I felt like I was betraying my feelings for you."

"I know you're in love with both of us."

"But what's worse is I do not know how to choose between you."

Susan's door suddenly opened and Lilliandil appeared in her bedchambers. "Then perhaps that is not Aslan's main objective."

"What do you mean?"

"I believe it is possible he actually brought both of us here to help teach you an important lesson."

"About what?"

"How to listen to your heart."

Caspian was about to speak up again when the sound of water swooshing around in Susan's private washroom stopped him. As the sound continued getting louder, the trio remained quiet yet puzzled by what could be making the noise, especially when there was no one previously occupying the room. However, when it sounded like someone was getting out of Susan's tub, the girls began to feel nervous. They unconsciously drew closer to Caspian, while the young king was tempted to go see who or what was in there. So after he motioned for the girls to stay where they were, he moved towards the door…until he saw the brass doorknob turning. The door opened, stopping Caspian in his tracks, and a young man with sandy blond hair, drenched from head to toe, appeared in the doorway.

Immediately recognizing who it was, Susan covered her mouth with her right hand and was only able to whisper one word in response.

"Peter."

A/N: Hmm... I wonder how that lesson is gonna go now that Peter's in the story. LOL!

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