Title: Damaged

Summary: Everyone is damaged, she explained, but not everyone is broken. Ashley never thought that going back to Baltimore with Kyla would bring her face-to-face with the one person who made her feel like she wasn't broken.

Disclaimer: I don't own SoN. What I do own is a computer and the amazing ability to not do what I am supposed to with my time.

AN: I'm ALIIIVE! (-ish)

Much love to everyone who reviewed, you guys make my life complete :) You may notice, if you know anything about lacrosse, that I don't know anything about lacrosse. I watched a couple of games when I was in high school (more than a couple of years ago) but, yeah. Please don't cite me on things about the game that I probably got wrong, or do, if you want, I get bored at work and could use a nice conversation ;). As always, please review because I get super excited about them.

Also, I suck.

Sports, almost as a rule, were not something Ashley did. She was a cheerleader for, like, a day (okay, so for a whole year, but she's mostly repressed those memories), she'd only ever been to four games voluntarily, all of them being Aiden's in the last year and she can't actually recall a gym class that she didn't spend on or behind the bleachers.

In fact, Ashley was fairly certain she hadn't been in the her school gym since freshman spring formal, not even for assemblies and pep rallies.

And it wasn't that girls' lacrosse was anything special, although the fact that both teams were playing in skirts was a nice touch. So Ashley wasn't even attempting to be delusional about what had her constant attention on the field.

Spencer Carlin was fuckin' hot.

The skirt, Marissa told her it was actually called a kilt, was longer than the shorts she'd been wearing earlier when Ashley had seen her after her run, but there was just something about the blonde in a skirt, no matter the fact that it was athletic apparel, swishing hypnotically around her tanned thighs, that made the California native's eyes follow it with undivided attention. But it was more than just the physical aspect that had Ashley flushing in the warm Spring air, the blonde on the field just had this presence that could be felt, even hundreds of feet away in the stands.

Marissa, so obviously proud of her foster sister, was more than willing to answer any questions Kyla's guests had, as the fashionista herself was too focused to really pay that much attention. And while Ashley was sure that what the smaller girl and Aiden were discussing was interesting she just a bit too distracted to pay them any attention.

"Spence is an attacker, second home," she frowned somewhat, "Val usually plays first home." The boy sent her a semi-confused look and Marissa shrugged, "Attackers are players that are always on the offensive, there are three, called homes. First is mostly the scorer, second is the play-maker and third," she pointed out another girl that stood a little further up the field from Spencer, but still on the other team's side, "Mandy Palmer, is the main transition from middy to attack. When Val broke her leg Jessica Wyatt took her spot, she's good but, man," she smiled wistfully at the field where her foster sister and two other girls skillfully passed the ball around before a red-headed Jessica took a shot that was ultimately blocked by the goalie, "I wish you guys could've seen Spence and Val play together. Now that was fun to watch."

The ball was recovered by Pike's middies and passed sharply to Mandy who took a particularly hard check from a defender causing her to drop the ball during her fall and the spectators to wince. The defender was quick to turn to the recovery but before she could get her stick to the ground Spencer was right there dipping low to scoop up the ball and managing to cause the offending girl to trip over her own feet. The blonde girl passed the ball to an open middy before stepping over the defender and pulling Mandy up in one smooth motion. Laid up by her cast, Val sat on the bench and whistled so loudly Marissa winced around a laugh.

The game continued on, but both teams were obviously there for a reason so the give and take was even enough for the score to be tied two to two at the half. Kyla and her mom made there way down to the restrooms and Aiden mumbled something before following their path. Marissa spent the next few minutes explaining the finer points of the lacrosse, but without her favorite visual aid Ashley felt her attention begin to wander. Several rows ahead and slightly to the left was Juliet's group, huddled together and laughing at their own conversation. Ashley could see Juliet fiddling with her phone and seconds later, the injured blonde on the bench moved to check her own device without being seen by her coach.

"What's the deal with Val and that Juliet chick," she asked over the other girl's soft voice, but low enough not to be over heard by neighboring groups.

Marissa felt her neck jerk a little, though from the interruption or something else she didn't know. She blinked to process the question, glancing over at Juliet who was smirking down at her phone and then down to Valerie who sat on the outer most ring of the team huddle, phone held behind her back. "There is no deal," she replied slowly and somewhat guardedly, "They're best friends. A lot like Ky and Spencer."

Ashley's brow furrowed a bit. "Except they're both gay," she tried to clarify.

Marissa gave a wavering hand gesture, "Sort of."

"Sort of? How are they sort of both gay? Juliet's with Spencer and you're dating Val, right?" she asked, trying to remember all the information that passed between her half-sister and Spencer last night, when the blonde had caught the other girl up on the 'need-to-knows'.

Marissa looked immediately defensive, and the California native realized her tone was rather sharp and she was dealing with someone that knew players on both sides of the field, not just Kyla and Spencer. "That came out way wrong," she explained instead of apologizing, "what I meant was…"

But the bespeckled girl was already waving it off, which was good because Ashley honestly had no idea how she was supposed to rephrase herself without coming across as a total bitch, "It's okay, I guess, some people don't really know how to handle that sort of waffling when it comes to sexual orientation, especially those who are so strongly invested in the topic in an emotional level." Ashley blinked and Marissa flushed, "Sorry, I tend to ramble."

"S'ok," the girl blinked again.

The smaller girl smoothed her palms against her jeans, "What I meant by 'sort of' was that Val is gay, like I don't think she's even acknowledge guys if she didn't have to, but Juliet still claims to be straight, you know, like she's just gay for Spencer or whatever."

Ashley thinks back to the moment in the coffee shop that morning when the black-haired girl gave her the once over and has her doubts about that statement, and based on Marissa's tone she can tell the other girl isn't one hundred percent sold on it either. Marissa looks down to the field where the teams were finishing up their half time and Spencer was straddling the bench next to Val who was wrapping tape around the other blonde's wrist. That odd tension from the day before wasn't apparent from the distance, and Ashley wondered at the back and forth of them, curious about Spencer in a way she hadn't been about anyone else before.

"They never hooked up, for the record," Marissa gestured vaguely to the field, "They're just friends, kinda in the same way that Kyla and Jules aren't." It made sense, in a way. From the stories she'd heard Kyla and Juliet were both heavily into theatre where they were constantly competing against one another for leads, while Spencer and Val were athletes, more often than not, on team sports who were supposed to trust one another and build each other up.

She hesitated for a moment, wondering at the line she was toeing, seeing how far she could dig at a stranger about people she didn't really know just to get at a girl she may never see again. But then eyes that she couldn't see from there, but that she knew were blue, found hers and Spencer smiled at her and it was all kind of a moot point after that.

"You mind if I ask about the weirdness in your room yesterday?"

'Rissa sighed and raised one hand, "Kyla and Spencer," she raised the other, "Juliet and Val." She shrugged and dropped both hands, "when it comes down to the divas, Spence and Val aren't allowed to not pick sides and things can get a little… weird."

"That's got to suck for you," Ashley blow out a breath that ruffled her colored bangs, picking up on the strain in her voice.

Marissa chuckled for a second almost out of surprise, "Yeah. It oddly got a lot easier when Spence and Juliet started dating, that girl can mediate like none other."

There was a hollow feeling that sucked a bit of her breath from her. Up until that point Ashley had only seen people disapprove of Spencer's relationship, so it was easy to disregard it as something real or good. "Oh," she hummed, rubbing her palms together and glancing at Kyla as she, Aiden and her mom made their way back to the seats, "So they're good together then, Spencer and Juliet?"

"They're a high school lesbian couple, good or bad depends on the day of the week," she shrugged but let the amusement blossom on her face when realization set it, "Oh! Oh wow, you suck at subtle."

Ashley felt her face heat up, "Who said anything about trying to be subtle?"

Marissa clapped once, before blinking and catching sight of Kyla over Ashley's shoulder. Behind her Juliet's voice rang out over that of her friends and on the field Spencer bumped fists with Val before taking her spot to begin the second half. "Look, Ashley," she laid a hand on the other girl's bouncing knee, "You seem okay, sweet even, and Spence has this way of seeing someone for who they really are rather than what they portray themselves to be. But just… be careful with her, she doesn't need any more drama right now." She patted her knee once more and raised her voice, "And that's way I don't think you'll ever be a professional ice dancer, sorry, Ashley."

Her eyebrows were knit in a confusion that lifted as soon as Kyla resumed her seat next to Marissa, and Ashley was glad for the abrupt change in topics. Playing along she pouted exaggeratedly and crossed her arms, "You're kind of a dream killer, 'Rissa, anyone ever tell you that?"

Kyla's look of skepticism was overlaid by Aiden's confusion and Eileen's smirk, but Marissa skillfully tuned it all out as she withdrew her hand and turned back to the game, which Ashley gratefully copied.

!

At three minutes 'til the end the defender that had been glued to Spencer's side the entire second half stuttered around Mandy's close-by and fast paced foot work, leaving the blonde open for a pass from a midfielder that was sharply turned around for an all-too-lucky potshot at the goal.

The people around her erupted into a cheerful roar that shook Ashley from her semi-daze, because no matter how good the eye candy was, sports were still not her thing. The brunette felt something she associated with pride at the sight of Spencer touching the end of her stick with Mandy's, wide grin unmistakable. But it was a combination of Kyla shaking Marissa's shoulder excitedly while the other girl laughed mixed with Juliet's (annoyingly impressive) wolf-whistle that reminded her that she didn't actually have any claim to pride.

The goalie flung the ball as hard as she could reminding everyone that there was still time left, but the damage was done. Pikes had gained a second wind from the goal that seemed to come directly from the lungs of their opponents and as the seconds ticked by slowly (wa-ay to slowly for Ashley's taste) the back and forth play that had predominated the game took over again until the final whistle blew. On the field, Val's red-headed replacement dropped her stick and launched herself at Spencer who caught her mid-air around the thighs, spinning wildly until Mandy jumped in knocking them both over and starting a massive Pikes High dog pile.

"Look like you might have some heavy competition, Juliet," Scott's teasing voice carried to Kyla's group, "Blondie down there has girls literally throwing themselves at her, you might have to step up your game tonight."

Angela rolled her eyes and Donny punched Scott on the shoulder, "Not cool man."

Juliet's response consisted of a single finger and "Puh-lease, my girl is so in knots over me every one knows she doesn't even see any one else."

Her tone was so condescending and over-confident that it set Kyla's teeth on edge, so the fashionista was surprised when her raven-haired nemesis' gazed flicked to her own group's retreating backs, glare settling on Ashley before slipping into an uneasy look and following her friends down the stands.

!

Kyla's group caught up to the team in the open area inside the stadium gates just in time to see Juliet duck under Spencer's arm with a laugh, "Gross! You're all sweaty!"

"You know that don't matter to me, Spence-a-licious, I'll take her lovin'," Scott waggled his eyebrows at the blonde athlete.

Spencer, dressed in track pants and her jersey, took a step back to match his advancing one and held up her hands in a 'stop' gesture, "Uh, you don't get to touch me."

The people around her laughed like it was some sort of inside joke, but the California natives and Kyla caught the very serious undertone. Marissa ignored the tension and bounced right up to her foster sister, "I'll take it then," and threw her arms around the other girl's neck, hugging her tightly with both feet in the air. "You were absolutely fantastic out there, Spence!"

Spencer squeezed her once and set her down, blushing she mumbled, "Trust me that last shot was all luck."

Her right knee buckled from Val tapping it with the end of her crutch, "Don't listen to her, babe, Hotshot here's been planning the dramatic win for months now."

Spencer rolled her eyes but happily bumped fists with the other blonde. The member's of Juliet's group split so that Eileen could wrap the girl in a quick hug with a light, "I'm so proud of you." And even Aiden snuck in there for a high five. In the distraction of celebration Scott managed to pop up almost unnoticed next the Kyla, "You aren't going to say anything?"

The brunette shook her head with a slight smile and Ashley was confused until she realized that through most of the exchange with every one else the two best friends had held eye contact, identical smiles in place and that her half-sister wasn't saying anything because she simply didn't need to. It was endearing, and kind of intimidating.

Eileen excused herself to pull the car around and the groups chatted for a moment with several other member's of the team that had wondered over, when Ashley found herself side-by-side with Spencer with Kyla distracted by Aiden and Angela and Juliet preoccupied by Marissa, Val and Mandy. Marissa had told them all earlier how Juliet had promised both Spencer and Val that she'd be on her best behavior for the rest of the, and apparently she was being true to her word.

Ashley tucked her hands into her front pockets and nudged Spencer's shoulder with her own, "You were pretty amazing out there," she intoned softly.

"Yeah?" she asked, the tips of her ears turning pink. Then she was leaning to bump the shorter girl in return, "So it was my other hot, Californian stalker falling asleep in the stands during the second half?"

Ashley felt herself battle a blush at the athlete's teasing grin, "Hey now, you had my attention for the entire first part of it and that's kind of a big deal for me, just ask Aiden."

Spencer widened her grin and looked across the group at the boy in question who was at the moment telling a story with large, sweeping gestures to Kyla, Donny and Angela. Donny responded in kind, while Angela stood stone-still and stoic despite the light in her eyes, and Kyla gazed up at the Californian boy somewhat dazedly.

Spencer's looked turned pensive and she lowered her eyes to Ashley, "He's a good guy, right? I mean, he looks like a good guy, and I want him to be a good guy, but Ky, she's been burned in the past and she's honestly not that great of a judge of character."

The brunette's chuckle cut her off, "What are you talking about? She picked you for a best friend, didn't she?"

Blue eyes widened in mock horror, "Oh my God, you're right! It's so much worse than I thought!" She slapped her own forehead with an open palm and Ashley laughed openly, if quietly.

They grinned at each other for a moment before the musician glanced over at her friend and half-sister, "But to answer your question, yeah, he's a good guy," she winked at the blonde, "As good as a guy can be anyway."

"Good," the blonde breathed out, looking relieved, "Good."

Her attention was drawn a little to the left where, over Ashley's shoulder, Juliet was wrapped under Scott's arm and holding court in a manner that would make Madison Duarte jealous. The brunette felt her heart break a little at the frown on the other girl's face, who took Juliet and Scott's position for the warning it was. At that moment, there were so many things Ashley wanted to ask but she floundered around a way to keep the conversation going. Spencer solved her problem for her by turning a sad smile in her direction and asking, "Going home tomorrow, huh?"

Her surprised nod to the affirmative was lost when Kyla approached them with Aiden in tow and phone in hand. "Mom just called and she's waiting out front." Ashley nodded that she had heard and her younger half-sister turned to the blonde at her side, "You're coming back to the house right?"

Spencer caught the way Juliet was watching them and smiled thinly, "Jules and I are going to get something to eat, but I'll be over some time after that."

Kyla nodded once and, as if seeing everything going on in the other girl's head, patted her light-haired best friend kindly on the cheek, "You did good, kid."

Spencer's face scrunched up and Ashley found another similarity between Kyla and Eileen in the way they were so adapt at getting Spencer out of her own head. With a laugh, the blonde dipped forward and grabbed Kyla around the middle and lifted her clean off the ground.. She set the girl down, offered a quick smile to Ashley and tapped her fist to Aiden's before the trio made their way to the gates.

Behind them the others in the group found something, anything, else to occupy their attention when Spencer smiled softly at Jules, "Thank you for that."

The green-eyed girl's answering smile was just as soft, if touched by something akin to guilt. Instead of verbalizing her thoughts she reached across the space between them and offered her hand to the blonde.