Disclaimers: All characters belong to Takeuchi-Sensei. If two women together offends you then this story is not for you.
A/N: Thank you all for such positive feedback on the last chapter! This chapter was really hard to write and it took me a while to get started. I do hope it passes muster.
Reader Marz, since I am not able to respond to your review personally – Thank you, it makes me happy that you felt that way about Makoto. Yes, it is something that suits her very well! Thank you so much for following the story.
Chapter 10: Hearts Laid Bare
"Ami!" The brunette sat up quickly, pulling the surprised woman into her arms. "Ami, I'm sorry!" She tightened her hold around the woman and felt relieved when Ami did the same, letting out a shaky breath before burying her face in crook of Makoto's neck.
The storm's intensity outside had decreased somewhat but the power was still out in the apartment. The candles Makoto previously lit barely made a dent in the darkness that enveloped them. Ami, by varying degrees became hyper-aware of her surroundings. Makoto's arms around her combined with taller woman's scent and warmth provided a bit of tranquility. The danger of attraction was still very evident but the smaller woman was determined to push it aside for now. She shivered suddenly, and it occurred to both of them that Ami's clothing was damp. Makoto peered at her as if seeing her for the first time.
"You're going to get sick wearing those clothes!" Mako exclaimed, then offered, "I'll draw you a bath." Ami began to shake her head in protest but Makoto stilled her with a featherlight touch on her lips.
Her cheeks flushed, her face felt hot at the gentle touch from the brunette. "Okay," she agreed after a moment's hesitation. Makoto stood up, took one of the candles and stepped away into the darkness with a familiarity that Ami failed to notice.
The distance physically widened between them and they both knew eventually they would have to speak about what happened earlier but neither were quite ready to face the elephant in the room. Ami wrung her hands together nervously. Despite feeling relaxed a moment ago,a tension has sprung up and she doubted it would go away even with a hot bath. But she came back to talk to Makoto and talk they would. She assumed Mako left the bathroom door open because she could hear the sound of water as it filled the tub.
Makoto came back to the living room not long after. "I left the candle in there so you can see. I also laid out some dry clothes for you."
Ami smiled wryly and Makoto barely caught the expression. "What's so funny?"
"It seems everyone is offering me clothes tonight."
"Well I hope it's the last time for the night. I'm really glad you came back." Makoto smiled warmly at Ami and the blush renewed itself on the smaller woman's face. "Will you be able to manage?" She gestured towards the dark hallway leading to the bathroom and Ami nodded.
"Yes, I think I'll be fine."
"Okay then."
"Okay."
Makoto smiled, a mischievous light in her green eyes and Ami blinked, realizing she was still standing there when she should have been long gone. Her cheeks on fire, the smaller woman hurriedly left the room. The brunette smiled to herself, Ami is so cute! Now that Makoto thought about it, she had always felt the other woman was incredibly attractive. Sighing, her thoughts turned to the fact that she hadn't mentioned anything about her recovered memory. She'd also have to address her behavior that made Ami run in the first place.
Ami's soft plump lips under hers and the feelings they evoked rose unbidden. She wanted that sensation again but didn't think it might ever happen considering the way Ami had reacted. At this point Mako knew she wanted Ami more than a friend, she wanted her as her lover. Someone she came home to at the end of the day because Ami was the one who made her feel at home. Usagi might be her princess, but Ami was her heart. Ami was her light and she would do anything for her. Melancholy filled her, the other woman might not want her the same way but perhaps they could still be the best of friends.
It had been a while since Ami left to bathe but there had been no sound from that direction since then. Approaching the closed door she rapped lightly. "Is everything okay in there?"
"Ah, yes!" Came a muffled reply along with the sound of a small splash of water.
"Okay." Turning to leave she was surprised when Ami's soft voice reached her again.
"M-Mako-chan?"
Makoto paused, "Yes, Ami?"
"Could you stay...and talk to me?" The brunette found her throat had closed up at the request.
Interpreting the silence for a no, Ami spoke again. "It's okay, you don't have to." Makoto didn't have to see Ami to sense the small amount of hurt behind those words.
"No!" Realizing her voice came out harsher than she intended she took a breath. "No, I want to talk. You just... surprised me." Mako dropped to the floor, her back braced against the door as she settled herself into a sitting position. Searching for a neutral topic she mentioned the first thing she thought of in order to put Ami at ease.
"The storm seems to be letting up."
As if sensing the intention behind her words Ami responded gratefully. "Oh? There has been a lot of storms recently. They never last very long."
"Yeah." Searching for another topic she continued, "Hey do you remember that one time Minako was so surprised by a thunderstorm she spilled her entire milkshake on Usagi?" One moment Makoto was laughing at the memory of Usagi shrieking and the next her back and head was on the bathroom floor. She looked up and her mouth dropped open. A wet and very naked Ami was holding onto the door handle as she gaped at the woman at her feet.
"A-Ami-" Makoto managed to choke out the woman's name which brought her to her senses.
"Kyaah!" Ami's hands quickly covered herself as much as she could. She spun around, putting her back to the brunette as she tried to regain a modicum of decency.
Makoto scrambled up and pulled the door closed between them but the sight of Ami had already seared itself into her retinas. The smaller woman had never looked so inviting, the sight of her bare silky skin shimmered in the glow of candlelight and set Makoto's heart pounding. Her entire body felt hot as she flushed all over. The need to pace, to do something was strong within her. She controlled herself by taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly.
"I'm going to make some tea."
"Okay. I'll be out soon." Ami's muffled voice resembled something between embarrassment and relief from behind the closed door.
Exiting the gloomy hallway, Makoto glanced out through the balcony doors before she ducked into the kitchen. It was raining lightly now and she was tempted to step outside and cool herself off. Instead, she braced herself against the counter and placed a hand over her palpitating heart. Breathe, she instructed herself. Filling the kettle with water she placed it over the burner with deliberately careful movements. All the lights in the apartment flickered once and stayed on as she completed the action.
Good, Mako thought, Now that the power is back on that should set Ami at ease. She observed the intimate atmosphere brought on by candles left the woman a little on edge earlier. It had taken Makoto years, but she had picked up every little nuance and eccentricity of Ami's. So it wasn't that much of a surprise that she could read the woman like a book sometimes. She recognized what Ami felt without a word being said.
A shrill whistle of the kettle cut through her musing, indicating the water was ready. Dropping teabags in two cups she poured water over them and carried them out to the low table in the living room. She blew out the candles before returning to the kitchen for some macadamia nut cookies she made the other day.
Returning to the living room she heard Ami's footsteps and then the the woman appeared wearing a t-shirt and pajama bottoms of Makoto's that were two sizes too large. The pajama bottoms dragged a bit and the brunette grinned on the inside at the sight. She sobered up immediately upon seeing the bashful look on Ami's face.
"H-hey," Ami's tone was apologetic, "sorry about opening the door on you so suddenly. How's your head?"
Makoto had forgotten she smacked her head on the tiles, all she remembered was a glistening, golden Ami, body slick and smooth, the curve of her breasts and hips calling out for Makoto's touch. Gulping at the memory, she faked laughter to allay the woman's fears. "I'm fine, I didn't even feel it."
"Thank goodness. I was just so surprised when you mentioned that day! What else do you remember?"
"Everything."
"Everything?" Ami's blue eyes were huge as she stared at Makoto while trying to comprehend. "How?"
The brunette shrugged as she passed a hand through her hair. "I don't know. I had this weird dream right before I woke up. When I saw you looking down at me I just knew everything."
Ami slammed a fist down on the table beside her teacup and Mako jumped at the unexpected reaction. The smaller woman's shoulders slumped as she stared down into her lap. Her hair obscured Makoto's view of her face. "Why did you wait so long to tell me?" Her shoulders moved up and down in jerky movements that alarmed the taller girl.
Her eyes large at Ami's response, Makoto scurried across the other side of the table. Gently laying a hand on the woman's shoulder she brought Ami's face up in order to look at her. Tears gathered at the corners of Ami's eyes but there was a smile on her lips. "Mako-chan, I was so worried!" The tears glided down Ami's cheeks and Makoto could feel her own eyes watering. She brought both hands up and wiped the smaller woman's face with the softest of touches.
"I didn't mean to make you worry." Makoto pleaded. It was now or never, she thought to herself, she had to tell Ami how she felt about her. "I'd do it all again to save you. I love you, Ami. I think I have for a long time now."
Fear crawled onto Ami's face and Makoto's heart sunk. "You can't." The smaller woman whispered as she turned away. "We can't do this!"
"Why, what do you mean by that? I don't understand." Makoto was confused, Ami was not making any kind of sense.
They stared at each other, Mako trying to find the answer in the blue eyes. "Ami, what do you mean?" She begged.
"I love you, Mako-chan." The teary confession did not fill Makoto with happiness that should have occurred with such an admittance. Something was obviously making Ami miserable and she needed to know what it was.
"Then explain why we can't do this." Mako demanded. "Please," she added.
"I can't see you get hurt again. It was because of me all of this happened! I love you and I want to protect you, this is my way of doing so." Ami looked away as she spoke.
"Aren't you just being selfish?" Ami flinched at the cold tone in Makoto's voice, "To put it another way it sounds like you don't want to hurt yourself!"
"That's not true!" There was anger in the rebuttal.
"Then prove it."
When Ami did not offer an answer, Makoto stood up with the intention of walking away. She stopped but did not look back when she felt a small warm hand in her own.
"You're right. And so is Rei-chan." Mako made no indication of having heard her but she continued speaking. "You're right, I'm just running away from the issue. I'm very much a coward."
The hug left her bewildered. The taller woman ran her fingers through the short blue hair while shaking her head. "That's not it, Ami. Love isn't about being brave or cowardly. It's our trust in each other no matter what. It's understanding and sharing to the best of our abilities."
Ami leaned into brunette's body and laid her head against the tall woman's shoulder. What Makoto said struck a chord within her. "I apologize for not being very good at this Mako."
Chuckling, Makoto replied, "If you're willing to put up with me then we have plenty of time."
Smiling, Ami stood on tiptoe and kissed the underside of Mako's jaw. The brunette colored at the contact but suddenly wanted more. Tilting her head down she captured Ami's lips with her own. The feeling of being home filled her with such warmth she never wanted to let go.
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