Brian leads the way to his room so that he can at least open the door for Justin. He still feels guilty at not being able to help carry this heavy burden, he knows that he is taller and more muscular than this slight baker and artist. As Brian holds the door open and sees the first gentle light right before the sun comes over the horizon he turns to see Justin carrying the tray in. And he's struck with the ease with which Justin carries said tray. He's not struggling, not panting, perfectly capable of holding it. It's almost as if he's carrying feathers instead of a wood tray with food and mugs and tea pot. Then again with all the kneading of dough and mixing of food, Brian suddenly wonders what kind of muscles Justin does have, and his reaction strikes a lot lower than he might think, very glad that he is now behind Justin… oh, what a glorious view, and one that didn't help at all. For Brian is now beholding the most delicious, scrumptious, perfectly rounded bottom he has ever laid eyes upon.
How did he not notice those two perfect soft, plump spheres in the kitchen… the counter must have been too high. Although Brian realizes he was also watching Justin's eyes and mouth and face. His lips and tongue move in such rhythm that at times had Brian's mind wandering to other activities… no… calm down, enjoy the company and conversation. For Brian had never been one to indulge needlessly, just to fulfill a base desire. It was part of his service to the King that he behave as a Knight to the King of England. However, there was no rule preventing friendship, or dare he hope, eventual partnership. And Brian has a feeling, should any relationship beyond friendship be tried, that it would be so much more than a onetime tryst. No it would be so much more and last as long as he could stay.
And as Justin was laying everything from the tray onto the table under the window, the sun's first light was coming over the horizon and bestowing Brian with a sight that for all his long years, and all the years in front of him, he will ever recall the angels did bestow upon him a gift. A gift, a sight, a vision, a dream, so magnificent, glorious, and angelic that Brian felt that he should get down on bended knee and praise their creator. He was right, Justin in first morning's light was truly more marvelous than the pure sunshine!
"Sunshine" Brian whispered softly, he couldn't help but utter that word. That word that seemed made for Justin, and only Justin, and Brian was of good fortune enough to bear witness to such a miracle.
Upon hearing a soft whisper from Brian, Justin had to turn around and look at Brian. He heard Brian say sunshine, but couldn't look at the sunshine. He had to look at Brian to see what Brian was looking at. For certain that sounded a lot more reverent than if Brian was only looking at the sun rise. What he saw was shocking to say the least, for Brian was not looking at the sunrise or even at the tapestry. He was looking directly at Justin. Brian was starring at Justin with such intensity and passion. There was fire in his eyes and something, something so profound he could do nothing but stand and watch, starring into those hazel eyes as they came closer and closer, for Brian could not fight the urge to walk closer to Justin, to be closer to Justin. So close were they that they were practically breathing the same air.
"Sunshine…Justin." Brian couldn't help but say it again, nor could he stop his journey over to the beautiful man in his chambers, nor could he stop his hand from reaching up to smooth the hair back from his forehead and behind his ear. Brian was stunned, hair softer than he could imagine, skin like fine china, porcelain smooth, yet warm, soft and pliable. Neither man could fully breathe as each was struck breathless with feelings so new and thoughts so welcome, yet hard to fathom. Neither man had the strength to fight what they were feeling. Food forgotten, art forgotten, conversation forgotten… wanting to taste, but not the bread so painstakingly prepared, but each other. Two pairs of perfect lips, two pairs of soft, yet strong hands, two pairs of eyes silently asking and searching for answers, two pairs of perfect ears hearing the struggling breaths from both. Caught in this wave of passion and emotion, and though neither mentioned it, and both not quite understanding it, love, a love so deep, so true, so strong that nothing and no one could ever keep them apart.
Brian took Justin into his arms, wrapping them around his back just to hold him and as he felt Justin's arms come up around his shoulders he couldn't help but sigh a breath of utter peace and joy. Never had either man felt such oneness with another, neither questioning what they were doing any longer. The sense of self, of belonging, of acceptance and appreciation they both felt in each other's arms were so perfect that the only thought was needing to be closer to the other. And as the two men shared their first kiss all thoughts, entirely, left. Both moaning at the contact, both stunned by the delicious flavor of the other, both enjoying the delights of the other's lips and tongue. A sensual battle of their mouths filled with so much pleasure and passion that they couldn't help but to want more. To get to that point of no return where two became one, where they were joined as closely as humanly possible for there was no other choice for these two lovers.
Brian's hands moved of their own accord and untied Justin's apron, having it fall to the floor. He then brought his hands to the front to untie his pants at the same time Justin's hands seemed to be on the same journey on Brian. They pulled away from each other to pull their own shirts off and let their pants fall to the floor. Then they had no choice but to stand and stare, more like admire, no, exactly admire. Both reveling in the physical perfection that was their partner, what a glorious word, a word they both thought, a word that they would gladly call the other. One bronze lover, one alabaster lover, both perfectly muscled for their body size, both with a surprisingly large man hood that stood proud from both bodies, bathed in a perfect bed of soft curls that matched the hair on their heads.
Brian held out his hand to Justin who gladly accepted the invitation as Brian walked backwards to the bed, never wanting to take his eyes off his perfect lover. He scooted up the bed till he was lying down, but leaning up on his elbows while Justin crawled up his body. Which surprised Brian, he would expect his new lover to be timid and join him in the bed beside him, but he did not. Justin slowly and sensually slid up Brian's body till their erections brushed one another, both letting out surprising groans of pleasure. Surprising because neither man had ever felt such intense feelings for anyone who had shared their bed. While neither man has had a large number of partners, they do know more than enough in bed to please a partner. And when one has such a glorious and perfect lover to share one's bed, Justin couldn't help but use everything he could think of to please them both.
Justin laid himself taught on top of Brian's beautiful body; thighs, arms, chests, groins, and lips touching intimately, passionately, never wanting these feelings to end.
"Justin…you … you take my breath away… I've never known a lover to be so passionate, so all consuming...so stunning…"
"Brian…you are the most handsome man I have ever seen, and I don't know why I'm saying this but I feel as though we were meant to be… this feels so good, so right, so astounding."
"Sunshine… my sunshine…as soon as I saw you downstairs you took my breath away and I have been slowly drowning ever deeper in your beauty, your passion, your intelligence, I need you in a way I never thought I would need anyone."
"Yours? Truly I like the sound of that. It is stunning that I should find my hearts and souls desire from just baking bread one night, but it seems I have…but before we go any farther, I am afraid I have thought of something that I cannot keep to myself any longer. Not only out of my desire to be honest with you, lover, but out of respect for my king."
"What does your king have anything to do with what goes on in this room?"
"He has nothing to do with what goes on in here, with you, but he does have something to do me, although…I would like to explain, if I could, before we do anything we might regret, or before you get upset and throw me out."
"Sunshine, I could never throw you out. It doesn't matter what you could possibly say that would make me not want to by my side always."
"As happy as that makes me, let me explain before you decide. I don't know how much you know about Arthur, and I'm assuming since you didn't recognize me or my name you might not know Arthur as well as you think you do. You see…*deep breath* (Justin turns away from Brian because he cannot look his love in the eye before breaking his heart)… I am Arthur's lover."
He hears a sudden intake of breath from Brian. Justin knew it, but he must continue.
"I am sorry Brian, I have deceived you, I never meant to. I knew the moment I saw you, you would be ever special to me, but I could not continue knowing that if Arthur ever found out about my behavior he would hate me."
Justin is almost ready to get up and get dressed to leave when he feels Brian's hand on his naked back and Brian's other hand takes his chin and turns his head to face him.
"Justin…you're right, I clearly don't know Arthur as well as I thought, but it doesn't surprise me, not when someone so beautiful is right here, so tempting, how could he not take you. I can also completely understand how he could fall for you. But if you are being so open and honest, then I feel I should do the same, for you see, around here I am not known as Brian."
Justin waits in silence for Brian to finish. If they both have a secret that needs to be concealed then this truly is not a good idea. It will be the hardest thing Justin has ever had to do, but he knows he will have to give up Brian.
"I think once you know my name that all around here call me you will know exactly who I am…my name is Lancelot."
No, no, no, that can't be… that's oh, no. My Brian… my beautiful, perfect Brian is…is…Lancelot. Arthur's most favorite Knight, the one he trusts more than his own life. No…
"I am the one who is sorry Justin. I thought that you only worked in the kitchen and it was so nice to have someone to talk to without the expectation of being a Knight and loyal to only the King. I love Arthur and my oath is to serve and protect him with every ounce of strength and every breath I have. How could Arthur never mention having a lover? He has a Queen, Queen Guinevere, a most wonderful, honest, noble woman. You say you've been here almost as long as Arthur, how can no one know about you? How can he have a Queen? How does he have… never mind, ignore that question. Years, he's been King for years…Justin…oh dear lord, are you not supposed to leave…are you allowed to go outside. I've never seen you with the King. Goodness, I've been staying here for years and never knew and I am closer to the King than anyone else, well except Guinevere, and clearly, well, you."
Justin is again facing away from Brian trying desperately not to cry, but he feels his heart breaking. He knows how much Arthur loves him, and Justin could have sworn he loved Arthur, but he knows now he was never in love with Arthur, it's Brian… it's Brian he is in love with, his heart will always belong to.
"Brian…Lancelot…"
"Brian, please call me Brian…I never want to be Lancelot to you, with you. I was Brian when I was little, I only became Lancelot when I left home."
"Very well Brian… I don't know how to describe what I have with Arthur. Up until yesterday I would have said we love each other, but he had to have a Queen. Guinevere knows me and she knows our relationship, and you're right she's such an honest and noble woman, so understanding. She understands Arthur and his needs, although I don't think she knows how deeply he feels for me. And like I said, up until yesterday I thought I knew how I felt about him. But what you say is true, although I am not truly kept hidden. The people expect a King and Queen, if nothing else than to produce an heir. Arthur does love me, but he sees me as weak and small and in need of protection. He is always so scarred that if his enemies found out about me they would stop at nothing to find me and take me until Arthur did anything to save me.
"And while I understand his reasoning and I respect his fear and accept his protection, there are times it's like being a prisoner within these castle walls. I do not go outside, except in the stables directly behind the castle, and only when accompanied by Debbie or her son, Michael. I am very glad this palace has windows so I can look outside whenever I want. Arthur trusts everyone who works here and lives here, but he does like me staying more or less hidden. The fewer people know about me the safer I am. I don't know what it would do to him to lose me, but I may have no choice now."
"What do you mean, have no choice…no choice but to leave? Why would you leave? You wouldn't be safe, I can understand Arthur's thinking, he has some powerful enemies who would…*shudder*…I would never be able to forgive myself if anything happened to you. I would not survive without knowing you are free from harm. Although I also think that Arthur is wrong, you have a strength beyond many courageous men I know. You must truly love your King, but I don't understand why you say till only yesterday did you love each other."
Justin is trying his hardest not to cry, but a few tears escape anyway. Brian notices and moves to sit behind Justin. Justin gasps a little at the sudden contact, but also starts breathing hard at the knowledge that it's Brian sitting directly behind him, and, how he forgot he'll never know, but they are both still nude and a nude Brian behind him…this is not helping with the explanations. The way Brian is holding him, cradling him in his strong arms, his warm soft, but hard skin. No matter what they've said so far, it's nothing compared to how safe and loved he feels right now, safer than anything he's ever felt before.
"I know how Arthur feels about me, still does, possibly always will. I don't mind staying for my own safety, as I am familiar with his enemies, as well. I do wish I could venture outside more sometimes, but I make do with what I have. And yesterday…I hadn't met you. I…I love you, Brian…I'm in love with you, more fully, more deeply, more completely than I thought a person could love. I feel like I've known you my whole life, and it would kill me to be here and not be with you. I do love Arthur, and while we, let's say, enjoy each other's company, I have never felt as close to him or anyone, or as safe as I do right now, in your arms. I know I would not be as safe elsewhere, but I do not want to stay here if I cannot have you, can't see you, can't lay with you and touch you and talk with you."
"Justin, could you turn around please, I would like to look into your beautiful eyes now…"
Justin doesn't want to, but how could he deny this man anything? He turns and gasps again, the man is beyond words, indescribably perfect. Never has he seen anyone like his Brian…he can't even say his name without calling him his.
They both moan a little at the sudden contact. Justin straddling Brian's legs as Brian sits against the headboard. It's not the most comfortable position to talk in, but it's certainly enjoyable to the senses. And if this is the only time they have to truly be together then they should enjoy it.
"Justin…Sunshine…I don't know what's going to happen now, and I can't promise that this will be easy, but I can promise you that I love you, as well. An all consuming love that I didn't think humans capable of. If you left I would have to come with you, not just to keep you safe, but I'm afraid that I'll never want to be without you again. I will always be loyal to Arthur, but for you, I would give up my Knighthood. I want to always see you and touch you and feel you and hear you. I did not believe in soul mates and destiny, but I do now, seeing you has made me believe that anything is possible. I believe it would crush Arthur to know about us, and while I am always honest, to a fault, I don't ever want to lose you. I can't lose you.
"it may be wrong and selfish, and if I can forgive you and you can forgive me, but I want to be with you, as often as possible. We need never tell Arthur or anyone else. We are both in the castle often enough and even though somehow we have never met, it's not unreasonable that we shouldn't meet. And I happen to know of a secret passage outside the castle into the meadow just beyond the palace walls, but very hidden from views, as it's covered in every tree imaginable, while still letting in some sun light. It would be my pleasure to show you and share that with you. I never thought I would ever find something or someone that would make me question my loyalties to Arthur, but you, Sunshine, my heart, my lover, my life, my world, are worth everything."
Justin has to get his breathing under control for a minute before responding the best way he knows how. He takes his hands, grasps Brian's face and crushes their lips together. Both moan loudly at the contact. Both hard instantly and grinding against each other with an urgency they've never felt before. Brian's arms wrap tightly around Justin and Justin does the same. Hands exploring each other's backs, heads and as Brian's hand goes down to grab and rub Justin's bottom both men groan even louder than before.
"Brian…oh…my..."
Brian knew Justin had the most perfect bottom ever, but to feel it, to know those perfect round orbs are his and always will be. Such a magnificent feeling Brian has never known.
"Sunshine…I need…to be inside you…"
"Yes, Brian…my word, yes, please…"
Brian uses the oil next to his bed, which only previously he had used himself, late at night, but knew it was there for a reason, never did he think he would ever get a chance to use it nor did he feel the need to use it, until now. He lays Justin flush along the bed…such a sight to behold…his own angel staring wantonly through heavy lidded deep sapphire blue eyes. Brian crawls between his legs and places them around his hips and then he slowly prepares Justin using one, two, then three fingers. Justin is writhing and moaning and calling out Brian's name, Brian thinks he'll lose it before he's inside. He pulls out his fingers slowly and as Justin looks Brian right in the eyes, he slowly pushes into the amazingly, tightest, most perfect, hottest bottom Brian has ever pushed into. Both have to close their eyes for a moment at the delicious intrusion, at the pleasure pain that always happens when two men join in such a beautifully intimate way.
They're eyes don't stay closed long as they have to see each other, and what they see there not only surprises them, but proves to each other that they will say and do absolutely anything to keep this, to keep each other. The love, devotion, adoration, need, longing, lust, and absolute complete surrender of the other's heart, mind, body and soul to the other. Nothing in this life or any other life could compare to what they have right here, right now with each other, what they will always have, what they will always fight for, what they will always know.
They meet each other thrust for thrust, lips locking, tongues battling, hands entwined. Neither has ever felt such a need, such a possession, such a passionate desire to be this close and demand to be closer to another person before. And as their hips and lips battle and dance, their climax approaching fast and hard and as they both orgasm at the exact same moment it is the most perfect unison, the most perfect pleasure that you could ever hope for. Brian and Justin hold each other as tight as can be while coming down from the hardest, almost painful, orgasm ever experienced, never wanting to let go, never wanting to stop, and forever grateful they gave each other a chance. As their breathing returns to normal and they relax their hold a little, Brian lifts up to look into Justin's eyes and sees the love and devotion reflected back.
"You are my life, my heart and my love Sunshine. I will always be beside you, and you will always be mine. I will do whatever it takes to keep you with me and me with you. Being a Knight is not easy, and there are unfortunate times that I'm not here for days or weeks, but I swear I will always come back to you. There is nothing, absolutely nothing that will keep me from getting back to you. I would go through the fires of hell itself to get to you."
"Brian…never did I think I would ever find anyone I would be this close to, or feel this passion or desire, this longing, this…safety and love and completeness. I love you more than life itself. It's almost unfathomable that I have met you that we have what we have and have gotten there so fast. I feel the exact same way as you feel about me. I will always want you and I will always love you and be in love with you. Never will I want to be apart from you. I understand the long journeys you will go on. I am used to Arthur being gone, and I have always felt so alone until he returned, but I still did not completely feel whole and safe. But I know that waiting for you, always wanting you, I will never be lonely again, and I will feel safe and whole the moment my Knight returns to me."
And so Brian's and Justin's love continued to grow, to bond them together, to consume each other the moment they came together. No matter how far away they were, no matter how long they were apart, the moment they were able to be together again reignited the flame that was their passion to nuclear proportions. Brian took Justin through the secret passage he had discovered during one of his previous midnight strolls, as often as possible. Justin enjoyed being outside among the grass and trees almost as much as he enjoyed being with Brian, but having Brian there made it even more wonderful.