Rest My Chemistry, by Interpol. I know it can be a song about anything, but I just liked the idea of a daisy in lazy eyes.

I know it's been forever since my last update, I'm so sorry. Life can be so busy sometimes...

The quote is the last stanza of 'Ode To Life', but it hasn't been written by Neruda as the most of us know. It's an amazing poem, if you don't know it I suggest you to Google it.

I'm not going to ramble anymore; I'll leave it to Meredith.

Part 20 – Like a Daisy in My Lazy Eyes

Let's avoid death in soft quotes

remembering always that to be alive demands an effort much bigger

that the simple fact of breathing.

Only a burning patience will lead us to reach a wonderful happiness

Martha Medeiros

Opening my eyes, I could smell something yummy coming from the slightly open door. The bed next to me was empty, the sheets cold. I stood up and followed the scent, peeking in Alice's crib to check on her, but finding it empty. I sleepily walked downstairs. I stopped at the kitchen's doorframe, smiling at the most tender scene I've ever seen: Derek was cradling Alice in the wrap Makena had given me, flipping a pancake. He had already set the table for breakfast and Alice was soundly sleeping. God, I love that man.

"Hey," I whispered.

"Good morning. I made you breakfast." He turned and flashed me one of his McDreamy smiles.

"You didn't need to," I bit my lip.

"She woke up and you need sleep. I had to wake up anyway; my shift starts in a couple of hours." He kept smiling and put the pancake on my plate, topping it off with warm chocolate. My mouth watered at the sight of it. Why was I still craving chocolate anyway? I sat at the table and he sat across me, smiling. He gently stroked Alice's cheek and she snuggled closer to his chest, not opening her eyes.

"You're wearing the wrap," I stated, smiling before chewing the first bite of the most amazing pancake I've ever tasted.

"It's amazing Meredith. Before you ask, I googled how to wear it." he smirked

"I see," I muffled my laugh.

"What?"

"I never thought would be so into the Daddy thing," I joked.

He laughed hard, then lowered his tone remembering Alice cradled against his chest. She didn't even flinch.

"She's so mellow this morning. Wasn't she hungry before?" I asked

"Nope, just wet," his adoring smile lingered on her, before he looked up and locked his eyes with mine. "God, she's gonna be beautiful just like you."

"With your hair," I teased. He chuckled.

Alice stiffened in his arms as I stood up and placed my empty –and very clean- dish in the sink after a second pancake. Derek un-wrapped her before she started to whimper, gently leaning her on his shoulder and tracing soothing circles on her back. He stood up and bounced a little as she began crying. Then he gave her to me, figuring that she was definitely hungry.

He kissed my lips quickly, and sat across from me again when Alice started nursing noisily. A beam crept onto Derek's face.

"She's gonna have you wrapped around her little finger, Derek," I smirked, knowing that I was practically in the same position as he was.

"I know," he sighed with a defeated smile.

"You're gonna spoil her more than your Mom is."

"She's the best at spoiling. All those grandkids taught her well." I giggled

"I'm sorry she left, I was getting used to her," I said.

Carolyn stayed with us longer than Derek's sisters, helping us out for the first few days with adjusting to things, sharing precious tips with me, and making the whole idea of motherhood a little less scary.

"I'm gonna miss her too."

"Why did she drive here anyway?" I asked

"The airport was crowded and there were lots of delays because of the snowstorm in Boston. That's why my sisters got here a couple of days later than her. She could only find a flight to Portland and she took it."

"It's quite a long drive, she could have waited."

"She couldn't. It's my Mom we're talking about..." he replied, matter-of-factly

"I'm not gonna let her drive here for the next one. She'll wait..."

"The next one? You mean the next baby?" His eyes widened. I grinned, knowing very well that I'd caught him unprepared.

"Yeah. Alice's gonna have a sibling at some point."

"Oh," his eyes were shimmering.

"I don't want her to be alone when she's older. Besides, I love having Lexie around, and you have all of your sisters..."

He stood up and kissed my lips softly, smiling widely.

"I love you," he muttered, before Alice smacked lightly at his chest with her foot to get him off of me. I laughed hard.

"I don't want to think about what she'll do when she's five or six." I grinned

"I was just..." he frowned, defensively.

"Kissing her breakfast machine?"

"She's bossy already. I'm owned for life," he laughed

"I think you are."

He kissed me again, this time from behind, so Alice was oblivious. Tiny loving kisses from my mouth to my ear, then a final one at the top of my head. Alice kept on nursing gently, placing her warm fist on my chest, her eyes closed. His chin was lying on my shoulder and he started rubbing my circles on my back, soothing my achy nerves and loosening the knots as I leaned into the touch of his magical hands.

"Derek..." I moaned. I could feel him grin behind my back.

"You're gonna be ok alone for a whole day, right?"

It was his first day back at work for a long shift and he was somewhat pensive about leaving us alone.

"About that..." I began, but he cut me off immediately

"You want me to come home for lunch? I can do that..." he interrupted, rambling on without even breathing.

"I need to cut," I blurted out before he could mix up his whole schedule. And I felt selfish for saying it, more than anything, but I was missing the hospital so much and it wouldn't be for more than a few hours...

"Mer..." he looked at me quizzically.

"I know. It's pathetic and Alice needs to eat. Could you please ask Bailey for an appy? Or maybe just standing in the OR for a couple of hours..."

"Today?"

I flashed my smile and he placed soft kisses on my neck.

"Please Derek." I knew he couldn't resist me asking nicely

"Who's gonna stay with Alice?"

"Cristina or Lexie will. If they can't make it here we can take her to my mother's and I'll pick her up later."

Someone was going to be home, since Lexie had moved in permanently back at my old house with Alex and Avery.

"Look, I have a couple of spare hours between two surgeries this morning, you can come with me and I'll stay with her while you get your surgery fix," he grinned.

"Seriously?" I beamed.

"I need to ask Bailey first, if a spot is available and, you know..."

"Man, I'm so in love with you right now."

I turned to him and I wrapped my arm around his neck, preparing for a passionate kiss, when Alice whimpered, bothered that her breakfast was moving away. He was the one who stood up, turned me around and kissed me full on the lips, a hint of a smile curving the corners of his mouth. Then he walked to the living room, flipping open his phone and making a call I supposed was directed to Miranda Bailey. Alice finished her breakfast and tilted her head up to me, as she opened her bluish eyes and gazed towards me.

"I love your Daddy. He's amazing," I whispered before she let out a huge yawn and laid her head on my shoulder where I placed her. When Derek came back in the room, he had a wide grin on his face.

"You can cut, but get dressed properly first," he chuckled, before climbing up to our bedroom to change.

We arrived at the hospital too early for my appy but just in time for his first surgery. As I sat in the lounge and took my time changing, every doctor that came through the door stopped by to look at Alice in her car seat. She didn't seem bothered by spotlight being on her. She just looked around, trying to understand why weren't we home and why all these people were looking at her.

"Here's the McMommy!" I heard Alex. He sat next to me on the couch. "What is my favorite little lady doing here?" he cooed to Alice. I giggled as she stared at him quizzically.

"Mommy needs to cut," I smirked.

"So she dragged you here, uh?" he chuckled.

"I'm not abandoning her here or something, Derek is going to take her and she will be changed and well fed. She's gonna love it."

"I'm sure she will. Keep on rocking Grey, she'll thank you when she's fifteen!" he stood up and grabbed an apple from his cubby. "Say hello to Shepherd and ask him to fill me in for his next cool surgery!"

"I will. It was good to see you Alex, stop by sometime, I always have frozen pizza and leftovers!"

"I'm thrilled."

As he walked out, Cristina came in and widened her eyes at the sight. Alice immediately reclaimed her mid-morning meal with whimpers and Cristina snorted.

"I thought this baby liked me!"

"She loves you, she just loves eating more. Can you grab my scrub top, please?"

Alice latched at my breast and Cristina stared at me for a moment, frowning. I smiled.

"What?"

"You're a weird woman Meredith Grey."

"I can take it."

"Just look at you: you're finally bright and shiny," she pointed at the nursing baby in my arms.

"I think I am. I'm cutting today!" I could feel my own excitement in the sentence.

"You're back to work?" she replied a little too excitedly.

"No, I asked Derek to find me an appy because I need to cut. I have three more weeks of leave." I smiled, really looking forward to those weeks

"You can't tell me you were dying of boredom."

"When she's asleep I really don't have anything to do. I caught up all the sleep I lost throughout all these years," I admitted

"She sleeps?"

"Like an angel. I just need to feed her at midnight and she goes straight to five, sometimes six in the morning already."

"I think I'll adopt her, if Owen wants kids," I laughed hard and Alice grunted, annoyed a little "Whoa, she's bossy just like you! I would never like to be in Derek's shoes." I smiled

"She smacks him already, he's owned." I giggled "Speaking of the devil..."

Derek's figure in a dark-blue scrubs appeared at the door and he smiled at us. I have to admit I missed how sexy he looks in scrubs.

"The devil has just clipped an aneurysm pretty successfully, thank you." He leaned closer and kissed my lips, hovering over Alice who kicked him away.

"You're really are owned Shepherd," said Cristina. He smiled, sitting by my side, opposite to her.

"Good news or bad news?" asked Derek with a smirk.

"Cut it off Shepherd," answered Cristina annoyed, as he kissed me again.

"Okay. Good news: my afternoon surgery was cancelled. Bad news: you need to have lunch with me."

"If you do well babysitting it might pay off." I grinned

"You think?"

"If you're not too tired, you look exhausted..."

"Alright then. You two are kind of sticky-disgusting, you know that?" Cristina interrupted our flirtatious banter and we both laughed. Alice's grip softened and I realized she was asleep already.

"Sticky-disgusting, uh? Is that even a word?" I teased her, cautiously standing up and giving Alice to Derek. He welcomed her with an adoring grin on his face. I gave him her bag and I finished changing into some scrubs.

"What the heck is that?" asked Cristina, pointing to a robe that Derek took out of the bag.

"It's just a wrap, we're not going to change her diaper," he answered chuckling. I took Alice from his arms and he wrapped the robe around his torso, then I gave her back to him and he laid her gently in the warm robe.

"Shepherd, did you just wrap her onto your chest?" He smirked at Cristina's disbelief. "I can't believe it! Good luck with your appy Mer!" she said, hurrying out.

"We scared her to death," I laughed, walking closer to him, filling the void between us with a kiss.

"I think we have. Are you ready?"

"As I'll ever be."

He kissed me once more, and I went to scrub in.

When I walked out of the OR, I had a huge grin on my face.

"You look good Grey, how's Alice?" Bailey started a conversation in the scrub room.

"She's fine. She's growing," I answered proudly. She's perfect. "I'm coming back in three weeks."

"What was today, then?"

"OR longing, I was dying of boredom."

"Believe me, I know," she chuckled. "Take care, Meredith"

"You too, Dr. Bailey and give a hug to Tuck."

She walked out smiling and I followed her steps to Derek's office, where I was sure I could find my two favorite people. I frowned at the two beaming nurses pointing at the blinds, and staring at me with envious glances. As I opened the door, I realized why: Derek was sleeping on the couch, and Alice was draped over his chest asleep as well. He was laying quite uncomfortably, the baby wrap still around his shoulders. Alice's tiny body was propped up on his left shoulder while his hand held her in place. Her small back was leaning into the cushion, and her cheek was right under Derek's chin. Their bodies were breathing in unison and small, hormonal tears pinched my eyes. I went closer and smoothed Alice's raven-black, fuzzy hair, but she didn't move an inch, so I tried to wake up Derek by kissing his forehead. He was startled for a moment, his senses alert to keeping Alice safe, then he realized that it was just me.

"Hey," he babbled. His voice was still sleepy. "How was your surgery?"

"Not as good as the sight I saw coming in here." I smiled widely, "But the patient is fine and I've already updated the family. Are you ready for lunch?"

"Maybe, maybe not," he said, spooning me in his arms. I leaned my head on the opposite side of Alice, tracing lines down her spine with my finger. Derek's peculiar smell somehow mixed with Alice's innocent newborn one and I closed my eyes to fully enjoy everything. As I opened them, I found the two most beautiful eyes staring back at me with unspeakable happiness. Alice's awake. I smiled and her eyes filled with more joy, her tiny hand held out to me.

"We can skip lunch, after all," I whispered, wanting nothing but to stay curled up like that the rest of the day.

AN: I needed some fluff so there you have it. It's a filler I know, but I had those three scenes pictured in my head and I needed to write them down.

Keep reading even after this, okay?