Okay, I'm sorry it took me so long, but life had been hectic, with the exam getting near every day more, I have to even plan showers and meals some days, so I was able to update only after, well, ages.

This is the second part of chapter 23, picks up right after the other, this time though we are guided by Derek. The song is from Iron & Wine and I changed the title last minute, just like the split structure of this chapter.

Anyway, I hope you'll still out there reading...

Part 23 B – The Night Descending

Everything that happens once can never happen again.

But everything that happens twice will surely happen a third time.

Paulo Coelho

I tried to comfort Meredith about Alice's first night without us, but I wasn't comfortable either. So, as soon as my phone rang and I saw Cristina's name flash on the LCD, I freaked out and I started walking to the Chief's office to ask him to go home, even knowing he was most likely at home already.

"What's wrong?" I immediately asked as soon as I picked up the phone, stopping in the cafeteria when I finally realized at what inglorious hour I wanted to disturb the Chief. I sat at a table in the far corner, even if it wasn't a busy place at night.

"I called you because Mer would freak out, but she can't stop crying" Cristina's calm but upset. During the seconds of silence while I was thinking about an answer, Alice's high-pitched cry reached my ear. She was desperately asking for her 'Ma-ma' "At least we know she had good lungs" added Cristina to cut the tension, the laugh nervous and forced.

"Have you tried a story?" I tried the first thing that came up in my mind

"Early in the night. She doze off a little, but when she woke up, before bringing her in bed, she wouldn't stop crying"

"Have you given her the bottle?"

"Yes. Even the bath didn't calmed her. I'm at a loss and I can't call Meredith" she admitted. It was strange to hear Cristina say that she didn't know what to do and that was even worse.

"Okay, okay" Not freaking okay, crap! "Pick the book with fishes and show it to her" she usually loved that book and fishes are boring enough to fall asleep

"We tried every book. It's midnight and she's still up. She should have been sleeping by now" she sighed

"I know."

"What would you do?" the hint of worry and helplessness didn't go unnoticed

"Snuggle her in my arms and telling her that Mommy will be back soon. It works, usually..." I pinched the bridge of my nose trying to come up with anything to calm her down

"It works because you're you. Daddy is a lot like Mommy" she almost snapped.

My mind began racing, thinking back at every single night we spent alone when Meredith was at work, but nothing seemed to calm her more than hearing someone speak, it didn't mattered if it was a story or simply pointless chat.

"Put her on" I immediately had an idea

"What?" Cristina was clearly confused

"Loudspeaker or whatever, I'll talk to her over the phone"

Alice's cry was becoming louder, something shuffled on the line until I heard "She's on"

"Peanut, hey, it's Daddy on the phone" the whimpers immediately stopped, replaced by sighs and long thuds. She was probably hitting the phone. "Daddy can't be there kissing you goodnight, remember? We talked about it at the lake," I tried to sound calm, despite the fact that I was freaking out and the keys of the car to come back home were already in my hands

"Ma-ma" she moaned

"Mommy is at work too, but there's Cristina. Isn't she so much fun to stay with?" I cooed, trying to sound cheerful

"Da-da" my name sounded suddenly so heartbreaking

"I know, Peanut, I miss you too, but we're gonna be back soon. I promise"

She kept crying, then, unable to be soothed.

"Cristina, hold her and I keep talking, maybe she'll cry herself out to sleep"

"I couldn't cry that much in a single evening, she's impressive"

If it wasn't my daughter whimpering and fussing on the other side, I could have laughed at her joke.

"What about a story from Daddy, uh Alice?" I began, pretending that she was in my arms and not back home. I could see her bloodshot eyes closing and her whole body relax as soon as I picked her up, like she usually does.

"Da-da" she moaned again.

"Okay, that's a good story. Do you still like princesses, right?" suddenly, the other side of the phone was silent, just some occasional sighs and sobs "All right then. There was a beautiful princess who unfortunately was all alone. The palace where she lived was always silent because her father was always in other reigns to work with her mother. She hadn't many friends, because she wanted to study very hard how to find a perfect solution to save lives. One day, both their parents never come back, so she decided to move away to another castle to find some more money to keep studying. She arrived in a beautiful place, full of parks and lakes, but she still didn't knew anybody. She was scared, but then she found a prince on her way, who helped her forget her problems and welcomed her in his castle. She immediately fell in love with him, but when they arrived at his castle to rest, the princess realized that the prince she found was about to marry another princess from the nearest reign. The queen and king also disagreed when he brought the princess there, but he didn't mind them and kept spending time with the beautiful princess. When the wedding day arrived, he told the princess to wear a beautiful dress as well and ended up marrying her instead of the other princess, who ran back to her old castle. After a while, they had the most amazing daughter they've ever imagined and they lived all together happily ever after"

No sounds again, which was good.

"Cheesy but helpful, she's back to sleep again" I could imagine Cristina's smirk

"Hold her a little while longer, then put her in the crib. She'll wake you tomorrow" I finally let out a breath I didn't know I was holding

"Thank you, Shepherd" she replied and for once there wasn't anything bitter of sharp in her voice, she was simply grateful

"Thank you Cristina. Kiss her goodnight for me and never tell that to Meredith, are we clear? Or I'll make sure you won't see my OR for a month" I jokingly threatened her

She giggled "Crystal clear. 'Night Shepherd!"

I sighed loudly, leaning back on my chair in the cafeteria, where I came to sat, slowly relaxing and finally tucking away the car keys.

"You okay?" a familiar voice arrived in my ear and I was glad to have just hung up the phone. Meredith appeared in my view as soon as I opened my eyes, she looked tired and restless, but I knew she was just as worried as me. She managed a small smile when she plopped on the chair next to mine with unbelievable grace, despite the late hour

"Hey Mer. Everything's fine. I was just worrying over Alice" I admitted, the corners of my mouth curling up in a forced grin, trying to look perfectly fine and not recovering from an emergency call from Cristina.

"Cristina will kick our asses tomorrow, I called her too. A couple of times. Maybe three" she flashed a wide smile

"Indeed" I was glad she didn't suspected anything despite my worn out face

"Okay, four" she giggled lightly and suddenly I wasn't so tired and worried as before "Everything's fine, though. We have a brave girl" her smile became suddenly tender, the one she reserved just for our baby girl

"Yeah" I sighed, still marveling how different she looked after she had Alice, all the dark-and-twisty seemed suddenly forgotten

"I liked that Cristina wasn't alone tonight. Owen was very helpful" she continued

I tried to place all the things together, snapping a quick nod in agreement.

"Can you believe that she's sleeping without us?" I smiled, knowing that she was finally resting, despite everything

"It feels so...Like I blink and I have to pay her college fees" she became pensive all of a sudden after voicing her thoughts and I know that the idea of Alice growing up scared her as hell

"Not that fast, but I think that we still have to save money for her college already"

She giggled, taking a lock of my hair in her fingers, sitting closer and leaning a bit on me

"It's our first night without her as well" she continued, a little bit flirtatiously, despite the evident tiredness that seeped through her whole body

"Feels kinda empty, don't you think?" It always felt empty when I had to stay late at the hospital, it was just the first time that I could share it with someone else that understood perfectly.

"Yeah" she leaned in to kiss me "Maybe we should make it better" she smirked, eying the on-call room on the other side of the hall

"Oh, I really could use some sleep right now" I teased her, kissing her neck

She quickly stood up, intertwining my fingers with hers and we walked to the room. As soon as she closed the door, her kisses were everywhere, pinning me against the wall forcefully.

"You're sure you don't have anything else to do tonight?" I tried to remain coherent a little while more to tease her

"Except being home with my daughter and I can't or kiss you? Of course I have nothing" she smirked, her hand caressing the skin on my back lovingly, but passionately at the same time

"Seems like ages we did this every night" I smiled, kissing her collarbone

"Good ol'times?" she added, throwing me onto the bed

"I like where your head is" I laughed, then I no longer wanted to think about anything.

When my pager rang, Meredith was still comfortably resting naked in my arms half-asleep, but she stiffened at the sound. I groaned, unwilling to move from the warm cocoon we created under the sheets, our bodies resting closer and Meredith breathing evenly in the darkness.

"It's mine" I whispered "Go back to sleep"

After I kissed her shoulder, her eyes were closed again. I looked at the clock and I almost cursed, because it was already five in the morning and my shift would have been over in a couple of hours, while my emergency surgery that apparently I had to perform was going to last at least three hours. It had been the longest night on-call ever.

When I arrived there, Shadow-Shepherd was already there, taking the vitals of the one that was supposed to be my patient.

"Dr. Nelson" I managed to speak, my voice still a bit sleepy

"Shepherd, I know you were on call, but that's my craniotomy" he replied firmly, not a hint of anger in his voice, but he wanted to make sure nobody kicked him out of his territory.

"You can have it. I'm going home to my daughter" a huge smile stretched on my face at the wonderful news, glad that I wouldn't have to spend the next three hours in the OR instead of at home with Alice. Nelson eyed me warily, but pretended everything was normal, shaking his head with an amused smile.

Meredith was still sleeping when I was back, so I snuggled beside her, wrapping my arms around her middle again and she didn't even flinch a little, neither when I kissed her shoulder or the back of her neck. She was exhausted. I drifted back to sleep in less than I thought, until I heard her muffled voice whisper my name from far away, pulling me out of fuzzy dreams.

"Mer?" I whispered back, forcing my eyelids to open.

"It's time to go home" her face appeared as soon as I adjusted to the dim light and her green eyes shone, despite the darkness, happy and relaxed

"Really?" I smiled widely

"Seriously" she sighed

"Thank God!" I kissed her again, before jumping out.

We met in the hall with our street clothes after a few minutes, pretending that we haven't spent the night snuggled together. We smiled widely, walking out linking our hands. She was the one holding out her hand, despite how much she hated those displays of love in front of everybody, she just needed something to hold on to just as badly as I needed it.

"Can you drive me home?" she asked, her voice somehow distant from the happy tone she used in the on-call room

"Of course, we can take the car back tomorrow"

Her face was serious as I looked more carefully, almost frowning, like she wanted to say something serious during our ride. Maybe she was just sleepy or she found out about the call. We walked in silence and it remained quiet until the first red light forced me to stop and face her, still wondering what she had in mind.

"Derek" I looked at her, meeting her serious eyes "What if I can't have any more kids?" she asked, looking away. The light was green and I struggled a little to move, clearly caught off guard by her question. Everything in her demeanor told me not to take this too lightly and even if I wanted to, I couldn't find any way to crack a joke.

"What do you mean?" I finally snapped out of the staring, speaking to gain a little more time

"We had to lose one baby to have Alice and I don't want that to happen again" she said in a small, almost breaking voice that made me want to stop the car and wrap her tightly in my arms again

"You don't want to have more kids?" I frowned helplessly, still not getting where her head was

"Of course I do. What if I can't?" she bit her lip, out of a nervous habit

"Mer" I sighed, a small smile curling up my lips at her innocence, the mere idea of her wanting more kids enough to melt my heart

"Derek" she echoed "She can't live with us barely speaking to each other for months as happened last time I lost a baby or you speeding with your car" she rambled, her eyes avoiding mine

"There's no gun now. And you're not even sure it would happen" I tried to reassure her, the fact that she was still hurting for the speeding one more thing to add to my list of disappointments

"What if it does?"

"We don't have to say that now"

"We do"she pressed and suddenly, I needed to look at her even for a second, to see if she was different. Pregnant. I still remembered how perfect she looked in the first months when it was just her and me knowing that there was a tiny human growing inside her. She looked tired, but not really glowing like she was pregnant. Her question though still felt strange.

"Are you pregnant?" I frowned

"No, of course not, I would have told you in a nicer way. But it can happen" she dismissed and somehow she looked a little disappointed, annoyed probably by my stupid question

"I know" I smiled again, trying to comfort her

"What will you do when it happens?" she pressed the issue

"I promised you, no running. It will be easier, though. We have Alice..." she always knew how to cheer us up after the most awful day.

"You promise?" she cut me short

"I promise"

She smiled, brushing softly my arm.

"You wanna have more kids, then..." I asked, the glimmer of hope for the big family I always dreamed still there.

"Not yet." she quickly replied "Alice's still so little, but yeah, at some point I'd love to" a warm smile finally appeared on her face, brightening her tired features.

"I'm still talking to the on-call room Meredith, right?" I joked, knowing more than well that she could be more than unpredictable. Mommy Meredith so far was the one that kept marveling me constantly.

"The exact same person. Just forget about the dirty talks" she laughed and we finally cut right through the brief moment of tension.

"It was good" I babbled, but she heard anyway.

"The sex?" a knowing smirk replaced the warm smile

"That's always good." I flirted "The talking, the knowing each other's opinions. It was a while that we didn't talked like this" I admitted. We never had time to stop and just talk like we did especially after the shooting, before having Alice. After her everything sometimes was just so hectic that at the end of the day we just wanted to curl up in bed and sleep.

"This morning I remembered when you took me there at the lake for the first time and I had the exact same face Alice had" her face lightened up at the memory and I couldn't help the smile when the exact same memory flooded back in my head again

"Yeah, even if it was a little less warm" I smirked, remembering the downpour of that day

"We got soaked, coming back to the trailer"

It was November and the sky was pretty dark, but that morning she saw the lake shining from the trailer and she wanted to see it, so I brought her there. Then it rained, but it was still one of my dearest memories, especially the look of wonder in her eyes when we arrived there and she took in the whole scenery for the first time

"Do you remember when I brought you there after we began building our house?" another smile made its way on my lips

"Yeah." her smile widened "I was pregnant and Alice was as excited as me" her hand moved to her stomach almost automatically at the distant memory, just as if she was relieving the memory under her closed eyelids, a small smile appearing on her lips

"You were so beautiful on that dock in your bikini"

"Oh, I was just fat." she giggled "I still have a lot to lose and Alice's almost nine months old!" she snorted, shaking her head.

"You're the most beautiful anyway." If I wouldn't have paid close attention to her because of another red light, I would have missed the small hint of blush reddening her cheeks

"I can outshine Alice as well?" she mocked

"Sometimes" I grinned widely. She knew it wasn't comparable, but she liked too much teasing me.

As I stopped our car on the gravels, finally home, she leaned closer and kissed me with love and understanding after the heartfelt talk in the car, then she hurried out to open the front door.

As soon as Alice saw Meredith at the door, she squealed "Ma-ma!" and then tried to crawl to her, sneaking out Cristina's grasp. Meredith knelt to scoop her up halfway and they both laughed, brushing their noses together and snuggling into each other. When she lifted up her head and saw me behind Meredith shoulders, she smiled as well, tossing her arms to me and yelling "Da-da!" just as loud as she asked for Meredith. I grinned widely and I grabbed her from Meredith, tossing her in the air and making her laugh hard. We all sat on the couch then, Alice rolling from my lap to Meredith's, still uncertain of where to go.

"It's better if she takes a nap this afternoon" said Cristina, looking at me knowingly, her emotions well hidden from Meredith though

"Yeah, she was still up at ten yesterday" concluded Meredith and I sighed, grateful that she didn't suspected anything "We need to nap as well" she glanced at me, a smirk on her face. "Thank you Cristina" she managed to add, before her friend stood up and walked out, maybe annoyed by our glances, knowing exactly what they meant.

We both laughed and I leaned in to kiss her perfect lips, curled up in a soft smile, but Alice rolled between us and grabbed our t-shirts. We laughed almost in our faces: she was annoyed too, apparently.

AN: This was fluffy, I know, I just wanted to show Wonder-Daddy Derek for once. I wanted to cut out the story he told Alice over the phone, but I figured it wouldn't hurt much if I kept it. I hope you won't mind. Cristina is also babysitting overnight, how strange is that?

Anyway, I hope you liked that second part and I hope I won't need weeks to update again. I'm glad you are still reading, I don't know where to beging to thank all of you people who are following this story. Thank you!