I'm so glad I was able to update this early. I'm sorry for everybody who waited a long time for this story to be back on track, I hope to have a little more time for you but I doubt I'll be having a 'slow' week like this anytime soon. I'm still writing when I can, but I'm not gonna begin any new story anytime soon, probably not before summer. I know I promised a sequel on my other story and I'm working on it. I have a couple of projects on the way, maybe a third, who knows.

Anyway, I'm glad I was able to update so you won't be waiting really long to read the second part of the chapter, Derek's PoV. Picks up right after where we have left them: Mer is with Alice, Der has been kicked out. About the quote, I have again translated it by myself, as I couldn't find it anywhere. Who has the right one is welcomed to suggest it to me and I'll change it.

The song is again You Suddenly Complete Me, I bet you have already listened to it since I'm annoying you with this song from the very beginning. Remember, acoustic version ;)

Part 24 B – Strange Steps, Take Us Back

Accadono cose che sono come domande.

Passa un minuto, oppure anni, e poi la vita risponde.

/

Things happen, that are like questions.

A minute goes by, maybe years, then life answers

Alessandro Baricco

The nights hadn't been that cold all summer. Chills ran down my spine, sitting in the car, unable to drive anywhere.

I'd started sweating, so I got out and lied down on the grass, staring at the abnormally bright sky, full of mocking stars. Wind ruffled my hair and the tears pooling in my eyes felt even harsher as my mind raced.

She kicked me out.

We yelled.

Loudly. Unkindly. Over nothing.

I passed my hands through my hair and I could still smell the lavender shampoo she used.

My family was coming over and she freaked out. I didn't come home last night and she freaked out. She was exhausted and she blew it off on me.

She was so right.

The light was still on downstairs. She was crying on the couch, probably. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. I had to make it up to her. I had missed her the whole time we were apart and once more, I screwed up.

The house was quiet when I opened the door. Our piercing yells had been replaced by a surreal quiet. Not even sniffs broke the silence.

I peeked into the kitchen, but it was empty. The light was still on, forgotten after our screaming match. I tried the living room and the basement, but they were all empty. I walked upstairs, assuming she was already snuggled all alone in our huge bed, but I halted at the top of the stairs, hearing Alice's sighs and Meredith's soothing voice trying to calm her down.

I woke her up, and I didn't even kiss her goodnight. Again.

I walked down the hallway to her room, lingering at the door and leaning against the wall, trying to stay hidden. Meredith was sitting on the carpet, toys scattered around her. Alice was playing quietly, crawling to grab something new from time to time. She didn't spot me, so I just kept staring at them: Meredith's eyes were swollen and I could see tears shimmering on her cheeks even though she wasn't crying at that moment, trying to be strong for Alice most likely.

Suddenly Alice placed her tired little head on Meredith's thigh and Mer gently spooned her onto her lap, cradling her in a gentle hug. Alice's thumb popped into her mouth and she settled comfortably into her mother's embrace.

"I'm sorry Peanut," she whispered, just as she did before, when I walked upstairs. Then she kissed Alice's forehead and brushed away some of her curls, playing with a lock of her dark hair.

"Daddy's sorry too," I said, interrupting their moment.

When they heard my voice, both tilted their heads up to me. Meredith's gaze locked onto mine, the anger gone, replaced by guilt and something else I couldn't decipher. Alice rubbed her eyes and giggled happily, trying to crawl out of her mother's arms to reach for me.

Meredith let her go and I picked her up from the floor. Immediately Alice slapped my cheeks, her code to say that she was more than happy to see me. I smiled slightly, not forgetting about the fight, but trying to pretend that everything was normal for Alice. I kissed her cheek and she rested her head on my shoulder, closing her eyes again, her sleepiness not at all gone. I sat on the arm of the chair right next to Meredith, before rocking Alice to sleep. She was trying to spend some time more with me after two long days apart, but her eyelids were closing fast.

"Daddy's sorry he stayed at work instead of coming to kiss you goodnight yesterday. He was really was a bad Daddy," she clung to my shirt, letting me know that she didn't give a damn about that, she just wanted me to rock her to sleep.

I kissed her forehead again, realizing just how much I had missed her in the past few hours. Her warm breath brushed my chest and she let all of her weight press against me, too stubborn to let go of me easily.

"Daddy's sorry he yelled at Mommy too. She had every right to yell back at him. I'm sorry I woke you up tonight Peanut. I am so sorry."

She was fast asleep, her even breathing filling the silence. I stood up to put her back in her crib and Meredith leaned closer, kissing her forehead but leaving me to put her back to sleep. She clung to my shirt with her tiny, ineffectual fists, unwilling to let go, but after another goodnight kiss she gently released me, rolling onto her stomach after I laid her down, her thumb still clasped in her mouth.

Meredith locked her gaze onto mine again, and then she walked out. I heard the water start to run in the bathroom.

When she joined me in bed, I was surprised: I had thought she would rather sleep on the floor or maybe kick me downstairs to sleep on the couch for being such a brainless ass. My surprise was even greater when she lied right next to me, wrapping her arms around my chest and burying her face in my shoulder. Her lavender scent was filling the air, drudging up even more guilt.

I missed her.

She started sobbing in a matter of seconds, all of the tears she'd held in all night so as to not break down in front of our daughter. I wrapped her in my arms, holding her tightly. I grazed my lips lightly over the top of her head. "I'm sorry too...I shouldn't...I haven't..." she stammered, still sighing, her tears were running wildly down her cheeks to my t-shirt.

"Shhh, it's okay. We're good." I tightened my hold on her, letting her know that I had forgiven her and I wasn't going anywhere.

"We're not," she sniffed, nuzzling her face in the crook of my neck and shaking it.

"We are."

"We can't do that to Alice."

"I know. It was bad."

She had calmed her sobbing, wiping away some tears, her voice was still muffled, but she was facing me now, her eyes piercing right into mine.

"I was the one who overreacted and started the yelling," she said, a veil of guilt covering her gaze. "I kicked you out of our home, Derek." She uttered my name in a whisper, soft and gentle. Caring, just like her.

"I deserved it."

"I wouldn't have been so mad if you had just called. You can stay at work when you need to, just bother to call so that I know what to tell Alice," she continued softly, the harshness washed away with her tears.

"I'm so sorry. I won't stay any more when I'm not on call."

"Please," the tone of her plea brought tears to my eyes, but I blinked them away.

"I promise I'll be better," I wiped away her last tears, kissing her forehead.

"Thank you. At least for Alice, do that for her."

"I'm doing this for us, not only for her." I could see the old uncertainty in her eyes, her healed wounds were cracking open and her childhood issues were coming back to the surface. Walls were about to be built again, and I didn't want to be locked out. "I love you, no matter what. For good and bad, Meredith, that's what marriage is all about."

"You still believe we can make it?" tears were still shimmering in her eyes and I wanted to just take all of them away.

"Don't you?"

"I do. It's...Sometimes it seems like everything's different than before…" she hesitated.

"You mean Alice?"

"Mostly, but not just her, I don't know what it is actually," she admitted.

"We haven't had time for ourselves lately; it's been a tough summer. I know you'd love to be on a beach somewhere," I tried to lighten up the situation a little bit, hoping to see her smiling again.

"That's not the point. I like Seattle in summer. It's just us...something's not working anymore and we used to be so good at making things work," she sighed. We had been through so much I don't even know how we got through everything.

"Yeah, we were."

"Did you miss me last night?" she whispered, probably afraid of my answer.

"Yeah. Did you?"

"I was able to sleep without you. I couldn't do that before. I had to bring Alice into our bed to get a decent night's sleep," she stated. And it hurt.

"We have a problem," I sighed, wrapping my arms around her tiny frame even tighter.

"I don't know. I don't want to make something big over nothing, something that we can't fix. I promised Alice she would have it better than me. I promised..." she choked at the thought unable to utter anything more, her hand grasped my t-shirt tightly and her eyes brimmed with tears again.

"We are keeping our promises."

She silently rested her head on my chest again, breaking our gaze and wiping her cheeks clean. I wrapped my arms back around her, brushing her damp hair with my fingers.

"Can you hold me tonight?" she hesitated.

"You don't even have to ask."

"I think I do."

She choked down another sob, sniffling, and I knew that everything was my fault. Something more than just the yelling was bothering her, and she was right. I hadn't held her in the past three nights. The last two I was at the hospital, but the first one, I had just rolled onto my side when she'd turned her back to me.

She was exhausted and I didn't even hold her, for three nights straight. And I almost missed my daughter's goodnight kiss again.

"Would you make love to me Derek?" She still had tears gathered at the corner of her eyes and her cheeks were wet, so I kissed everything away. "Please."

She was about to cry again. I started moving my kisses to her jaw, and down her neck. She leaned closer to me, sighing.

"I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you somehow." I needed to say it, if not for her comfort, for mine. I felt like crap for treating her like that again, after all the beautiful moments she had given me.

"You already are, Derek. Thank you," she whispered and her forgiveness meant more than anything. Once more, she was the strong one.

"We are worth the fight, remember."

"I won't forget."

She lightened up, and then crashed her lips into mine. Her eyelids closed for a moment and I was afraid to ruin the moment and make her angry again if I pointed it out.

"Derek," she sighed, pulling away.

"Hmm…"

"Can you just hold me? I'm so tired tonight," she paused, gathering her strength back. "We'll make love in the morning."

"I'll kiss you good night, then." The corner of her lips straightened for a second at my attempt to lighten the mood and I smiled, my own face matching her tired features.

"We can have a goodnight quickie if you want to," she suggested.

"I can hold it off till tomorrow if you need sleep."

"I know. I don't know if I'll be able to," she smiled wryly, brushing her hand from my chest down my tight, tiredness obvious on her face.

"Goodnight quickie, then?" I asked, my hands already caressing her skin in the way she loved the most.

"Definitely," she trailed her hands under my t-shirt before pulling it off and throwing it on the floor, rolling on top of me.

"Thank you," she added, before kissing me again and going from my lips down to my chest, fidgeting with the waistband of my boxers. "I love you, Derek."

"I love you Meredith. You're the best thing that ever happened to me. I'll never stop loving you."

She smiled, widely this time, finally all if the uncertainty had faded from her eyes and mine were able to lock onto to her perfect gray-green gaze, melting my heart.

AN: I hope you liked this chapter, it was short, I know, I just cleared up the mess.

Alright, thank you for spending some of your time reading my story, I hope I won't need ages to update this again!