Gibbs didn't know what to say as he stood by his senior agent and let his hand rest on the younger man's shoulder in silent support. After everything Ziva had said, he was sure the man needed it, but he felt Tony shrug the hand off before moving to lie down on the couch.

"I'm tired, I'm gonna get some sleep."

Gibbs just nodded at the words not wanting to push the man just now, besides sleep was something the younger man really needed so he went to the trunk in the corner and brought out a blanket and a pillow. The latter he handed to Tony and the blanket the draped over the Italian before standing by the sofa, desperately wanting to kiss the younger man good night now that he had an inkling that Tony might not be completely adverse to the idea, instead he bent down and placed the kiss on the man's forehead and wished him goodnight.

Tony closed his eyes at the gentle contact and listened as the older man left the room and locked the front door before his footsteps retreated downstairs into the basement and the soft sounds of him working on the boat reached Tony's ears.

He opened his eyes and noticed that Gibbs had killed the light from the room on his way out but the blinds were open so a gentle light streamed through the window and as his eyes adjusted to the low light, he could see the shadows and shapes of everything in the room.

He couldn't figure out what to think now that Ziva had left and things had calmed down somewhat, he wasn't really sure what to make of everything she'd revealed during the evening. Ziva was right, he was nothing but a pathetic piece of shit who would do anything for the man he was in love with. Hell she'd nailed him perfectly by saying he'd bend over for Gibbs like the whore he is.

And now Gibbs knows.

Tony suddenly felt like he was suffocating and he quickly sat up and turned to sit one the edge of the couch as he tried to calm his breathing that had sped up with the realization that his boss now knew just how screwed up he really was.

But hadn't Ziva said something about Gibbs sharing his feelings. The more he thought about it the more he convinced himself that it was just one more of her games, another way for Ziva to mess with his head, and he hated himself for believing in it even if it had been for only a short moment. He should have known better.

He ignored all the signs from Gibbs that might have hinted at him caring and feeling something for him, thinking he was trying to make something out of a big pile of nothing.

The fact that Gibbs seemed so mad at Ziva was probably just because she had lied and the bossman hated liars and being blindsided. Most likely none of it was for his benefit.

And maybe Gibbs hadn't really grasped the full meaning behind everything Ziva had said or had wrote it off as being said just in the heat of the moment, but once he realized what a freak Tony really was, he wouldn't spare a glance at him and he would be grateful for Ziva for almost getting rid of him.

After all why would Gibbs feel like that for him? He was a weak slut and from the moment he'd fell in love with Gibbs he'd promised himself it wouldn't affect his work and that the older man would never find out. Now the secret was out and to top it all off Tony had shown just how weak he is so that his boss had to drop everything to take care of him out of duty as his boss. So maybe Gibbs would be better off if he left, maybe when he realized that Ziva had been right he would forgive her for the lie and they would be happy together. And Gibbs wouldn't have to deal with all of the insecurity shit Tony carried with him. For god's sake Gibbs had to practically carry him out of work and feed him because he couldn't handle being rejected or seeing the man he loved be happy with someone who could give him everything he couldn't. How selfish did that make him?

Yeah, he had to go. It would break his heart and he hated the idea of leaving NCIS and his family there, but he needed to do it. And Ziva was right about the fact that Ducky, Abby and even McGee had noticed his pathetic behavior so they would all be happy too to get rid of him so they wouldn't have to deal with his hurt teenage girl- routine.

Besides he didn't think he could work with Ziva after everything so it was either he left or Ziva did, and he didn't want Gibbs to have to make the choice between them. Mostly because he didn't think he could handle that rejection as well. So he would leave them before they left him.

Tony pushed himself up from the couch, pleased to find that he wasn't as unsteady as his feet as he'd been earlier. He felt a headache building but ignored it, it wasn't anything he couldn't handle and right now he had things to do. First he'd have to get to NCIS to print out his resignation and then he'd have to get his stuff packed.

Leaving wouldn't be as easy this time as it had in the past, but he could do it. The thought that this would be better for Gibbs than him staying would provide him with the strength he needed.

He walked into the big kitchen and pressed the light switch and in a few seconds the room was flooded with light. He walked to the counter and found a pad of paper and a pen and wrote a small note to Gibbs.

I'm sorry, Ziva was right about my feelings for you and everything. I didn't want you to know since I know you don't feel the same. I'll have my resignation to you ASAP.

I love you but I hope now you two can make up and be happy with me out of the way.

TD

He let a tear slid from his eye as he attached the note to the door of the fridge before turning. His vision swam for a second after the quick turn but righted itself after a moment of swaying. He hoped he really wasn't getting sick after all this.

He quietly made his way outside before calling a cab to come pick him up from the end of the block. He hung up and took one last longing look at the house he'd left and whispered a soft goodbye before walking to the spot the cab would be in a few minutes.

TBC...

A/N: Okay so first of all I'm so sorry about not updating yesterday like I was supposed to, I wasn't feeling all too well and just couldn't get anything done .

And I know Tony's thoughts might not really make sense to some of you (I have to admit I'm getting confused trying to follow Tony's logic even though it did make sense when I wrote it... ), but just think If you'd be exhausted and it was late and you start thinking of these kind of things, how much sense would you make?

I'm going to try and get the next chapter up on Saturday evening/night at the latest and If I for whatever reason won't be able to meet that deadline, you have my permission to throw onions at me. (I really really hate onions...)