As Alfred and Britannia the fairy stood out in the rain, they watched the familiar draw bridge that led to the castle town slowly lowered.
"Aww, yeah~" Alfred smirked. "Now that we have all three sacred stones, Lizzie is sure to fall in love with me~"
"I wouldn't bet on it, if I were you." the fairy shook his head as he floated near Alfred's head.
With that statement, a faint figure of a white horse and two people on it's back became visible. As it quickly approached, the figures became more visible.
"Shows what you know!" Alfred pointed at the quickly moving horse. "She's already rushing out here to embrace me-Ah!" he ran out of the way as the horse almost ran into him.
"Outta my way, jack ass!" Elizebeta called, clutching onto the white horse as it galloped away.
"Don't worry, Liz!" Alfred turned to look in the direction the two were dissapearing to. "That was probably my fault!"
"Shut up, you loser!" she spat. "Hey, Gil, we're not getting away fast enough, so we'll have to drop some useless weight."
A pause. "... So, I'm afraid you'll have to get off."
The Prussian sighed. "I was thinking you'd say that, girlie, so I duck-taped us both together. "
"Damn you, Gilbert!" the Hungarian groaned. "You're always one step ahead... Well," she pulled out the ocarina from her pocket, "I suppose this ocarina is the second most useless thing I brought with me."
She chucked it behind her. It landed with a splash into the water beneath the draw bridge.
Alfred just stared at them as they dissapeared over the rolling hills. "Hey, did she just throw something behind me?" He turned to look, only to look and see the familiar pale-faced man on his black horse.
"Noo!" Alfred cried, taking a step back.
The male blinked. "What are you screaming for?"
"Oh," Alfred sighed in relief, "Sorry. I got confused for a while and thought this was chapter one."
"That's why you read the damn script!" a voice echoed from far off. Alfred shrugged. "I don't give a crap about the script, and neither do you! So long as we make it funny."
"Fair enough." the voice sighed. "And Britannia the fairy, my favorite character, you'll get some more lines soon. Even if I have to make up some crap."
"Thank goodness." the fairy sighed. "Now, quit talking, Hitsu4hinaeva. It's kind of the equivalent of breaking the fourth wall."
"Okay. I'll be back.. with company..." the voice laughed evilly and dissapeared.
"So," Alfred's attention turned back to the Russian male on his horse, "Why're you chasing after Liz anyway?"
"Well, you see, little boy.." he cleared his throat, "I heard that the crime rate in Hetalia is so low, that the King is going to have to let some of the castle guards go!
"So, in order to help the police service, I have become a criminal."
"So, wait a minute," Alfred blinked, "You're being evil to be nice?"
"Yes." The Russian stated proudly. "Why, just earlier today, I stole this magical glow-in-the-dark baseball." he held up the glowing ball of light directly at the boy.
"Catch!" He said, throwing it at the blonde American. Alfred got hit by it, and he fell backwards. He shrieked in a high-pitched, rather girly-sounding voice. "Huh? What the hell?"
"Oh, no, what have I done!" Ivan panicked. "I've killed him!"
"Huh?" Alfred blinked. "No you haven't; I'm fine!"
"Oh, I truly have become evil!" he sped off into the distance with his black horse, yelling back to him, "I hope someday your grieving family can forgive me!"
Alfred stared at his retreating back. "That guy was really... bizzare."
-Several Hours of Swimming in the Caslte Sewage System Later-
Alfred dived underneath the water, and finally retrieved the ocarina Elizebeta had thrown back at him.
"I got the stinky ocarina~" he sang. "Oh, hey, there's a note inside."
" 'Dear Alfred,
It's me, Elizebeta. I'll have to leave the castle for a while because Ivan has decided to kidnap me for whatever reason. Needless to say, it's all your fault fortaking so long to get those damn sacred stones!
Unfortunatley, since I'm not there, I cannot punish you myself. So, you'll have to go put the stones at the Temple of Time and await my return.
At that point, I'll have chosen a suitalbe punishment for you!
Yours angrily,
Princess Elizebeta'"
"Aww, did ja hear that, B? 'Dear Alfred'." Alfred laughed. "She called me 'dear'."
"Did you even read the rest of the letter?" Britannia the fairy groaned, knowing the answer would mmost likely no.
"What for?" Alfred blinked. "It would just be her rambiling on about how great I am."
The fairy let out a long groan.
-Later, at the Temple of Time-
"Okay," Alfred shrugged and walked up to the large, black granite platform in the middle of the large church-like building. "I'll just put these things down here."
He set the stones each in a little hole, that happened to match their shape, on the platform. The burger-shaped symbol over the large block on the wall glowed a golden color and shimmered. The block opened up like a door would, revealing a larger room inside.
"Wow!" Alfred exclaimed. "A magic door! Just like the ones at the super market!"
They walked inside, examining the gigantic room. "And look what's in here," the fairy flew up a large plaform, surrounded by a few steps. In the center of the platform was the burger symbol, surrounded by five other symbols. One was a tomato, the next looked like Santa's hat, next was a rose, after that was a knife, and finally, there was a blank circle.
In the center of the hamburger was a sword.
"It's the sword of evil's bane!" the fairy flew around it, inspecting it's metallic surface. "The Master Sword..."
"Is that anything like the sword in the stone, where if I pull it out, I become the king of England?" Alfred went up to inspect the sword as well.
Britannia the fairy looked at him with a scowl. "I highly doubt it."
Alfred continued on, "'Cause if I was king of England, Liz would be sure to fall in love with me."
"Fine, believe what you'd like..." the fairy facepalmed.
Alfred put his hands on the sword's handle, "Sorry prince Charles, but I just became next-in-line."
He yanked the sword up, and it came free from the stone. A bright, blue light came from the stone and shot upwards, covering duo as it did so.
"Oh, no!" Ivan gasped. "That last special effect was so spectacular that we have no money left in the budget for anymore sets, or other characters!
"Luckily, I used to be a stand up comedian, da!" he laughed. "Did you know it's raining cats and dogs outside? I just stepped in a really big 'poodle'!" he laughed at his own, not really that funny joke. He then blinked. "Oh, hey, look, the triforce."
"CUT, CUT!" the voice from before called. "That wasn't even funny!"
"...Kolkolkol..."
"... never mind, d-do what you'd like."
TBC
Well.. yes. I appeared-well, was heard in the story at least twice. -headdesk- I SORRY.
I'm so very, very, very, very un-creative. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, 'cause I think it's crap... ;A;
~Hari-Sama