Phew! Sorry that took so long everyone! I'm been pretty sick over the past week and I've been on every type of drug you can think of to subdue it. Something tells me you wouldn't be interested in the ramblings of a doped up crazy person...
"Elemon skipped together in a field of lovely daisies. They were blue daisies, some of them red...but most of them were yellow with neon green petals..."
Yeah...doubtful...
...
Elena stood beside the door, waiting for Caroline to come back inside. She couldn't stop thinking about what she had just witnessed. Recreating the scene in her mind, she lingered on the details; Damon's hand on Andy's hip, his other cupping her tilted head. He had handled her with such care which surprised Elena; she had always pictured him in a blood fuelled fury, ripping through his victim's flesh like it was paper.
"Elena...ELENA." She turned, seeing a very concerned Caroline. "Is everything okay?" She asked.
"Well, no. Everything's not okay. But it will be. How's Andy?"
Caroline looked sceptical, like she wasn't buying it. "Andy's fine, she's sleeping in her car. Didn't you hear? She drank a bit too much and had to leave. Her keys are in the glove compartment though so she's safe and sound," she said with a wink.
Elena felt relived. This was one of the few times when a vampire's ability to compel was convenient. Thank you, she mouthed; hoping Caroline would catch it. She nodded in understanding before turning and walking back to their group.
"Hey," Bonnie said as they approached. "Is everything okay? Where's Damon?"
Caroline was quick to answer. "Damon is fine, Andy is fine, and everyone is just, fine."
That's Caroline, Elena thought. She was always trying to save the day and blow everything off like it was nothing. Elena however, wasn't so sure it was nothing. Damon had been known to take his fury out on unsuspecting innocents. Who knew where he was, what he was doing...who he was eating...who he was doing...
Elena took herself off guard. She was creating the scene in her mind, but she wasn't disgusted by it like she normally would have been. What am I thinking? She thought to herself.
There was a short, awkward silence among the group. It lasted several seconds before Tyler interrupted:
"Caroline, you ready to go home? We've been here pretty much all day." He gestured toward the door, grabbing his jacket.
"Um...actually. Elena's going to drive me home tonight. Right Elena?" she asked.
Elena was too enveloped in her own twisted fantasies to acknowledge the conversation. She was beginning to surprise herself; the scenes she was creating were far more detailed than she thought she was capable of. She was completely caught up in the mental image of Damon's hand shifting lower, and his teeth getting closer...when she felt a sharp jab in her side. She looked up, forgetting where she was for a moment.
"It's totally fine Caroline, I don't have a problem driving you home. I know you're sick of driving me everywhere..." Tyler was continuing.
Elena's gaze flickered to Caroline, whose face was cocked to the left; looking into her eyes with a penetrating gaze. Is she trying to compel me? Elena thought to herself. She regretted that thought almost as soon as it crossed her mind. Elena was in the real world right now, where best friends could communicate with just one glance. She knew better; she had to stop herself from jumping to supernatural conclusions.
"Its fine Tyler, Elena said she would drive me home." Caroline politely said.
Elena quickly picked up the jist of the conversation. "Actually Caroline, I'm feeling pretty tired. Would you mind grabbing a ride with Tyler?"
She watched as Caroline's gaze turned slightly irritated. The expression vanished suddenly, turning pleading. "It'll only take a few extra minutes. It's barely out of the way."
Elena thought this over. It was very much out of the way...if she was going straight home. However, if Elena was headed to the boarding house, Caroline's house was just across the bridge. She quickly caught on to her friend's train of thought.
"Yeah, sure. You ready now?"
...
After organizing a ride for Jeremy and saying a quick goodbye to Ric; Elena and Caroline were on their way; Elena completely forgetting the original purpose for the gathering.
It was raining, like most days this time of year, and Caroline was staring at the surrounding trees in wonder.
"You know, it's strange how many different reflections you can catch in raindrops if you look hard enough. I didn't appreciate any of those things near enough when I was human..." She was clearly in a reminiscing mood, which was making Elena grow increasingly impatient. She had clearly been under the wrong impression when she thought Caroline wanted to help her out with Damon. She wanted to hear her friend's view on things preferably before the impending blowout.
Elena slowed just before the bridge, signalling her right turn into the driveway that lead up to the boarding house.
Caroline's was immediately alert. "Wait...where are you going?"
"Caroline, I'm going to the boarding house; to deal with Damon. You were right back at the grill, I need to deal with him sooner rather than later."
"Hang on, I didn't say that...don't get me wrong, I agree!" She started back peddling. She wanted to talk to Elena about what had taken place but she didn't want to be PART of that confrontation. It was for them to sort out; she just wanted to make everything a little bit easier for Elena to understand. "But you're going to have to deal with Damon on your own. He'll just get pissy if I'm there!"
Elena had come to a full stop just before the drive way. She looked at her friend incredulously. "Seriously?"
When Caroline didn't respond, Elena sighed and pulled back onto the highway. Fantastic, she thought to herself. Clearly mis-led.
Both girls were silent as the car approached Caroline's house. Caroline was trying to think of ways to approach the subject without putting Elena on the defence, while Elena was trying to think of ways around having to confront Damon on her own. As soon as the car came to a full stop, Caroline reached out and grabbed the keys from the ignition.
"Caroline, what the hell! What part of TIRED don't you understand?" Elena's impatience had begun to boil over.
"Elena just...hear me out for a sec." Caroline interrupted.
Sure, NOW she wants to talk. Elena glared at her friend, managing to forget what Caroline was and what she could do. "What."
"I'm on Damon's side on this one. I just want you to know that. I know you, and I know what you're thinking. I know that you're disgusted, and angry, and that you're concerned for Andy and that you could just drive a stake through Damon for what he did tonight but...you need to know that given the situation he was in, he picked the best option for everyone." Caroline slowly watched Elena's face evolve from irritation to an expression she couldn't read. She almost looked thoughtful. Maybe her words were having an effect after all.
"Vampires and humans experience hunger and cravings in a similar, but at the same time very different way. I know you get irritable when you're hungry." Elena couldn't argue that. "Well, so do we. Only, when we get irritable; it threatens to boil over into full fledged rage. We get violent Elena. And there's no telling what could happen if we don't find a way to subdue it. I know this because I've felt it."
Elena studied Caroline. So this was her reason for wanting to be alone: She felt she needed to plead Damon's case because...because why?
"Why are you telling me this?"
Caroline was relieved at Elena's response. Confusion was a hell of a lot better than refusal. "Because Damon is beating himself up enough for the both of you. I thought he handled himself very discreetly tonight and the last thing you need to do is go over to the boarding house, guns ablaze, ready to pick a fight. If anything, he deserves your praise..." no, praise is the wrong word..." or, scratch that...he deserves your understanding. Things could have been a lot worse."
Elena looked at Caroline in a new light. She had never seen her friend's new affinity for blood in a positive light; she had always seen it as a curse. Like, she was just one more person in her life to remind her that things were different, that they would never be the same again. She absorbed her friend's words of wisdom appreciatively, slowly developing a new perspective for things. There was only one thing that didn't make sense...
"Caroline, I don't understand. He fed this morning, on a blood bag. I watched him. How could he be that hungry already? Hungry enough to experience the anger you described?"
"Well, like I said before, it's not just hunger we experience with that much intensity, its cravings too."
Elena couldn't make sense of it. What could you possibly crave when all your diet consisted of was blood? "Do you mean like, animal blood versus human blood? Because I've never known Damon to crave animal blood and I'm pretty sure that what he had this morning was human..."
Caroline was already shaking her head before Elena was finished. She looked around, praying for a comparison that would make Elena understand. Her eyes fell on an old crab-apple tree that had been in her yard since she was little. There it is, she thought.
"Okay Elena, just hear me out for a second. Say, your favourite food was apples...and everyday you went out and picked an apple fresh from a tree." The understanding was slowly starting to fade from Elena's eyes. "I'm losing you aren't I?"
"A bit...yeah..." What do apples have to do with any of this? Elena thought.
"Okay well...just listen to me! Your favourite thing about eating apples was that juicy, crisp crunch you experienced when you bit into one. Yeah?"
"Sure, Caroline."
"Okay good! Now say one day, someone came along and told you that you couldn't...or rather, that it was better for you to put those apples in a blender and...and drink them. No more juicy spray, no more satisfying crunch...no more picking. Wouldn't you get sick of drinking apple juice eventually? Wouldn't you crave the experience of hunting that apple down and biting into its delicious skin?"
Elena's face was blank as she registered this. As silly as the comparison was, it actually made a lot of sense to her. She considered what it would be like to go a life time trying to deny herself the very substance she existed for. Apples, she thought to herself. It makes so much sense.
Caroline braced herself for her friend's rebuff. It was no secret that Elena was beyond understanding. If she had anything, she had morals; and she wasn't one to abandon those morals in an attempt to adopt a new perspective. But Elena surprised her by letting out a sharp chortle, before erupting into full fledged laughter.
Caroline's relief was evident on her face as she broke into a smile. "I know it's kind of a ridiculous comparison but, there really is no better way to put it."
"It's not ridiculous Caroline; it's actually kind of perfect." Elena managed to get out around the last few chuckles of her fit. When she was done, both girls sat in silence for a moment, both deep in thought. Caroline was the first to break the silence:
"So you're good right? I mean, you're not going to freak out on Damon when you get back?"
"No Caroline, I never intended to do that. I just...it's hard for me. All of this is so unnatural. It's hard to remain the only sane, reasonable human being when you're surrounded by supernaturals." Elena paused, considering asking the question that weighed heaviest on her mind.
"I know Elena, but...luckily, you're not alone. We want you to understand, to accept us. There will never be any shortage of supernatural beings to answer your questions." Caroline smiled, satisfied with herself. She turned to open the door, finally confident that she was leaving Elena with enough faith for a civil conversation with Damon.
"Caroline, wait." She paused, one leg out of the SUV. Clearly, they weren't finished yet.
Elena watched as Caroline pulled herself back inside the car. They faced each other now.
"What is it?" Caroline whispered, surprised by the sudden intensity in the car. Elena's face was dead pan, a serious question lingering on her tongue.
"When Damon was...when he had Andy. When he was biting her; she looked..." Elena struggled with the right words. "...she almost looked like she was enjoying it."
"Yeah, and?"
"Is that because Damon compelled her? Because I've only been bitten a handful of times and it hurt. It hurt so bad, I just can't understand what would make her enjoy something like that."
Caroline's face fell. It started to dawn on her why Elena carried such animosity towards the act. She had no idea what it was like to be truly intimate with a vampire. That's impossible, Caroline thought. She and Stefan had been together for almost a year. "Hang on Elena, has Stefan never...bit you during sex?"
"What! No! Why would he?" Elena gaped; seemingly appalled by the question.
Holy shit, Caroline couldn't believe it. Of all the intimate moments Elena and Stefan must have experienced, never once did he show her the best part of having a vampire for a boyfriend. Caroline was temporarily stunned by this revelation. She may as well be a virgin...
"Caroline, c'mon; say something. Please don't leave me hanging here..."
"I'm sorry, but I'm shocked." Caroline watched as Elena's face turned embarrassed. She dropped her gaze to the wheel, clearly feeling alone in her ignorance. "Okay Elena, I'm going to try and explain this to you. I'll let you know right now though; there is no human comparison for you to draw from."
Elena nodded. She tried to open her mind as far as she could. This was something she needed, desperately to understand.
"I'm sorry, Stefan should be the one explaining this to you given the fact that he's...you know...you're lover and all but, he's not here right now. It's really something that needs to be experienced." Here we go, Caroline thought. "When a vampire feeds off of a human for pure nourishment, it can be pretty...unpleasant. But if you're with someone you trust, whether they've compelled you to trust them or not, it can be kind of...arousing." Caroline knew this from experience. The first time Damon had bit her, she was terrified. There was no warning, no comfort, just intense pain. She had been sure that he was going to kill her. The second time however, was a very different experience. Caroline wasn't a fool, she knew Damon had only comforted her because he wanted to use her but nonetheless, she had trusted him. He explained his motivations clearly, holding nothing back, not even the fact that he intended on killing her eventually. She was certain of one thing and one thing only, that she trusted him. She knew nothing other than that she was safe for the time being. So when he sunk his fangs into her neck, her worries vanished and she gave herself over to her senses.
"It's almost as though you're sharing a sixth sense..." She continued, struggling to remember her experiences. "There's this, unspoken connection between you that makes it hard to focus. All of your walls come down and your secrets come out. You're not worried about the way you look or the way they view you, you just...feel. It's almost as if you get inside each other's heads, like you can feel what the other person feels, like they're a mirror reflecting your own emotions and doubling them. At that moment, you're about as intimate as you can be with another person Elena."
Elena listened carefully. What Caroline was explaining sounded incredible. In the past year, Elena had never once been free from her secrets. By bringing her into his world, Stefan had forced her into a lifestyle that depended on evasion and lies. She suddenly felt resentful towards him. He had knowingly done this to her, and though he claimed to love her, he didn't even inform her that there was a way for her to experience a few moments of temporary, secret free bliss.
"So, basically...all this time I've been missing a crucial part of our relationship, and I haven't even known."
Caroline hesitated. She knew she was treading on delicate ground. "I think the only reason Stefan would have kept this from you is because he's not capable of giving it to you. He can't control the frenzy that starts within himself when blood is spilled, which is probably why he never even tried. I'm sure he only kept it from you to keep you from getting hurt."
"But it seems so selfish for him to keep this from me when it's something we could have used. This could have brought us closer Caroline. And besides, he's been taking blood from me for a while; he just hasn't been biting me."
"He has?"
"Yes! He has! He's watched me prick my finger everyday for the past few months and never once did he think to inform me there was an easier way. A less painful way." Elena was furious now. She couldn't believe how selfish he'd been, whether it was to keep her safe or not. "I've made so many sacrifices for him. I've given up everything, including my self-respect to make sure he wasn't alone in his battle. He's given me nothing; all he's done is take from me Caroline!"
Caroline leaned over to embrace Elena, who was starting to become hysterical. "Shhhhh," she whispered. "I'm sure there's more to it Elena. You need to find him, and get the answers from him yourself. There has to be more to his side of things."
Elena pulled back to look at Caroline, suddenly remembering her purpose for being at the grill in the first place. "I totally forgot. The whole reason Damon and I were at the grill tonight was to talk to everyone about..." she paused, taking a deep breath in.
"About what?" Elena just looked at her, unable to continue. Something in Caroline's mind clicked, like something she'd long been expecting was finally about to happen. "You're going to find him, aren't you? You and Damon, alone."
Elena could only nod. She knew that if any of her friends could understand why they wanted to do this alone, it would be Caroline. The girl may be blond, but she was the furthest thing from daft Elena could think of. "I'm sorry Caroline."
"It's fine. I get it. And so will Bonnie and the rest of them with time. Just please promise me you'll be careful."
Elena smiled; of course she would be careful. And after tonight's revelations, she would make sure to be efficient. She was ready to confront Stefan, and the day couldn't come soon enough. "I promise."
"Okay good. Keep your phone on, I'll keep you posted on what's happening here." With one last squeeze, Caroline opened to car door and stepped out into the rain, which had become a light drizzle.
"I will, and hey..." Caroline turned. "...could you, maybe...tell the others. Explain why Damon and I need to do this alone? They won't understand right away."
Caroline winked. "For sure Elena. I'm sorry you'll miss me trying to come up with some sort of apple analogy for that one." And with a wave, she turned and walked towards the house.
Elena snickered. She felt different, more resolved. She reached down towards to ignition, feeling around for her keys which, thanks to Caroline's stealth had been replaced. As she backed out of the driveway, the rain stopped and the sky started to clear. It amazed Elena how quickly things had changed over the course of the day. She felt like a completely different person, with a new purpose and a new perspective. As the sky cleared and the stars became visible, Elena set out on the main road towards the Salvatore mansion.
...
What do ya think? Huh? HUH? Tips would be helpful guys! I need to know that I didn't lose the story after my break.
And it would be super cool to hear what you guys think will happen next between Damon and Elena...