Snape had been molested by the puke monster for hours. All the molesting had made the puke monster tired, so he went to go take a power nap. Snape carefully reached up his bum and pulled out his cell phone to call MJ.
*Ring ring*
"Ello? Who's this?"
"Hi! It's me, Snape!"
"Oh hey, sup?"
"Nothing much, you?"
Suddenly the puke monster appeared and said "Get off the phone you whore! I thought you loved me!"
Snape screamed and dropped his phone.
Over the static on the other line of the phone, MJ began masturbating to the moans of Snape and the puke monster.
"What the hell are you doing?" Sonic asked as he walked into the room Michael Jackson was in.
"I'm using my tracking powers to create a map of where the puke monster is keeping Snape." MJ said, still touching himself. Then Harry lept through the window.
"Oh! My eyes!" Harry screamed when he saw what MJ was doing.
"Ah, there we go…" MJ said as a map burst out the end of his wang.
"Harry, bend over and pick it up." MJ said.
"Gross! I'm not touching that!" Harry said.
Suddenly Ron the nudist flew into the room with Hermione on his back.
"Woo! It's a party!" Ron screamed.
"I have AIDS!" Hermione cried.
Ron tripped on something.
"WTF?"
It was Dumblewhore, all tied up (lolbondage). All of a sudden Fawkes flew in and stole the map.
"Oh shit! Kill the bird before he files away!"
MJ's wang went up and turned into a gun. MJ laughed.
"Look, I can kill it with no hands!"
His wang locked on the bird, and then began started shooting white stuff at it. Fawkes dropped dead.
"Nigga down, nigga down!" Ron narrated.
But the map flew away outside. Hermione hopped on Ron's back and they flew after the map.
"Go go Power Rangers!" Harry said. He suddenly turned into a flying pig and began following Ron and Hermione.