Broken Open Chapter 3: Flith, a yu-gi-oh! 5d's fanfic

Broken Open 3

I am so glad you all liked the last chapter!

I wonder if it is bad that while writing this story I feel bad for putting Yusei through all of this –sniffles-

Anyway, thank you all for your support and I hope you will all continue to enjoy this story. Bear with me if things get a little slow cause this will be one that gonna need to build to get the emotions across ^_^

And now, ON WITH THE CHAPTER!

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Filthy….

Yusei stood under the hot water as old blood and grime slid from his body. He hadn't been able to get a bath for the last 4 days since the…incident…but he had complained until finally Crow had let him bathe. Given, his complaints were more along the line of 'Please….let me bathe' then anything. He couldn't bring himself to demand anything but asking worked mainly because Crow was too shocked to say no.

So, Yusei got his shower, as painful as it was. He had just wanted to bathe but as he saw the dried blood and grime coloring the water, Yusei turned the water to scalding hot, letting it burn his skin till he could feel clean. The water stung, his skin was raw but it didn't matter, he needed to be washed till he was no longer filthy….

Filthy….

The water slowly turned cold till icy drops hit his burning skin causing a new sort of pain. Somehow, the new pains he was inflicting on himself felt better…as thought hurting himself could wipe away the pain He had caused. He knew it wasn't true though…Yusei knew the pain would always be there and he would bear these scars forever. 'I will wear these forever and no one will love this body….it's filthy…so filthy. Everyone will know what has happened…how can I face them….how can I look at them…I should die…dying will solve everything….no one will ask…no one will see….they will just forget I was ever there…'

Knock

Yusei jumped, cobalt eye spinning wildly as though he had been caught in his thoughts. "Yusei? Are you okay, you've been in there for a while…" The concern was obvious in the red heads voice. Yusei's eyes softened slightly when he heard it but he was still on edge. "Fine!...I'm fine…" He called out the door, waiting for the red head to leave. Just like he hoped, Crow walked away with a sigh.

Yusei grabbed the shampoo and washed his hair quickly in the freezing water before getting out and wrapping a towel around his waist. His skin stung and more than one of his cuts had reopened but he didn't really care just then. Looking in the mirror, he tried to pry his eye open. The right lid was pretty swollen and horribly bruised but he was able to get it open.

Wincing, he examined the eye itself. The whites of his eye were red and blood spotted with yellow in the corners while the cobalt itself was blackish and mostly unseeing. Letting the battered lid slip back over it, he sighed and prodded the yellow, blue, black and purple skin around the socket. Pressing down, he was pretty sure he cracked the orbit but it didn't matter…it would heal.

Taking the towel from his waist he examined his whole body in the long mirror. The sight brought him near tears but he was not going to cry. The stab wounds were bleeding slightly in some places and the edges were red and puffy from his shower. The older stab wound had stopped leaking greenish puss but it was still rather tender.

Yusei couldn't bring himself to look at his back as he wrapped the towel about himself again and limped out of the room. Crow had told him to come to the couch after putting on boxers so that he could rewrap the wounds littering Yusei's body.

Hurrying to his room, he slipped on a pair of light blue cotton boxers and dried his hair gently for a bit as though to delay seeing Crow. When he ran out of ways to avoid going out of the room, he sighed and braced himself. Stepping out, he walked as calmly as possible, trying though not really succeeding at hiding his limp.

Taking a seat on the couch slowly so as not to do any more damage than he already had, Yusei sighed while waiting for Crow to come into the room. After only a few seconds, the missing red head entered the room carrying a large basket of bandages, antiseptic and a couple of other things needed for his wounds. Setting the basket down, Crow pulled a chair from the kitchen and sat in front of Yusei. "Okay, let me see how the fronts healing up, then we'll worry bout the back." Yusei straightens and puts his arms out for Crow to check.

As the younger man goes over each injury, mainly focusing on the stab wound in his stomach, he would hum and ah at each till finally, her straightened up again. "Everything is healing up pretty well but I am going to put more cream on the cuts and bandage you up again after I get a look at the back." Yusei just nodded silently while Crow got on his knees and examined his legs. "I noticed you limping is it more because of your back or did something happen to your legs worse then what I can see?" Yusei just shook his head, basically saying he didn't want to talk about it.

Crow sighed and nodded, not knowing what else to say as he got the bandages to do Yusei's legs. "Luckily, you should be fine…There wasn't any spinal damage and anything else that could be making you limp should heal up pretty quickly. I know you're hurting both inside and out but you know…eventually you'll heal." Yusei stayed silent as the red head worked. He didn't want to think about it and he sure as hell didn't need Crow making him look ahead when all he wanted was to die. He wished He had killed him….finished the job. All he had been, all he had thought he would ever be had been taken away in one choice. A choice to be with someone and not leave them even when he should have, a choice that almost killed him and would now forever haunt him…that is the choice he made.

Filthy….

As Crow bandaged him up, Yusei could only hide in his mind. He couldn't stop replaying the way the pain in the shower had felt so cleansing, how it had been washing away all other pain and over loading his senses. It had felt….good. He wanted more pain….no…he, NEEDED more pain! As that thought struck him, a small spark lit in his cobalt eyes. Not a good thing though….for this spark of determination was to cleanse himself through pain. Unknowing of the thoughts in his best friends head, Crow continued to bandage and cream the boy. He was very gentle as he rubbed the cream into the burns and cuts on Yusei's back.

Every word made the red head cringe and each bruise made him angry as he imagined pummeling whoever it was that had hurt the poor blue eyed boy. Finally finishing with the different creams, He bandaged Yusei's torso and braced his ribs. "You really are healing up nicely for only 5 days….I think It's time to get you to Jack's place." Yusei flicked his working eye to Crow's face, seeing the tiredness yet happiness there, he couldn't bring himself to object. He had known it was coming and after five days, he had to go.

What he wouldn't admit was that he was scared….absolutely terrified of going outside this apartment. He hadn't left once in the 5 days he had been there, it was too scary…what if He showed up? These thoughts ran through Yusei's head as he listened to the red head speak. "I already spoke to Jack and he said he would pick you up tonight. He doesn't think it is safe to have you out during the day with lots of people after what happened…" Crow looked away as thought just saying that caused physical pain.

"Okay….I'll go" Crow smiled at Yusei, the tiredness leaving his face as the smile brightened the whole room. Yusei couldn't help but try to smile; the red head truly was something else. Even with everything Yusei had been put through and in turn put his friends through, the red head could still make anyone smile with just a single blinding grin. Crow stepped back from Yusei to let the boy up. In turn, Yusei stood slowly and carefully so as not to jar the bandages that Crow hand painstakingly placed on him.

The white of the wraps contrasted greatly with the light tan of his skin ad his normally spiky two toned hair was in disarray because of the wrapping over his eye but with all the injuries covered as well as most of the bruises, it looked as though he had only gotten into a D-wheel accident. This made him a little bit happier for no one would be able to tell what had really happened unless he told them…which he would never do. He would never let anyone know what had happened to him.

"I'll get some stuff for you today, Jack says he already bought you some clothes and when you were ready to go out, he would take you shopping for anything else you might need." Yusei nods mechanically and heads back into his room before the red head could possibly say anything else concerning the matter…he didn't want to hear. Didn't want to know the kindnesses being shown him by his friends after what he had done.

He was disgusting, he was nothing but filth. Forever that is all he will be. He wanted to see what his friends saw. Wanted to see why they would even think of helping something as disgusting as him but he couldn't. No matter what he had done over the past five days could make him see why they would do something for him. Yet everyday they did…every second he was shown kindness by those around him and he couldn't handle it. All it did was make him hate himself even more.

It only took about four hours for it to get dark and after that; it was only another 30 minutes until Jack got there. The blonde Aussie walked in to his room without knocking and smiled at him. Even just the smile hurt Yusei's heart more than anyone could know. "You're looking better than the last time I saw you." Jack examined him with his purple eyes. Those eyes took in not only the condition of the blackettes body but the darkness sitting in the back of his eyes. Before, were only lifelessness had been, there was something dark and swirling sitting in the cobalt sphere. Without knowing what he was doing, Jack reached out a hand. Ignoring Yusei's flinch, he brushed back some of his hair and stared hard at the deep blue orb.

"Jack?" The shaky voice that called his name made him draw back. All that shone in that eye for a few moments was pure fear before it settled back to the dark nothingness jack had been staring at before. Clearing his throat, Jack continued with what he had been doing. "Erm, ah, yes…er…I am here to collect you. I have a room set up in my pent house for you as well as your own bathroom and the like. Other than meals, you will not be required to do anything unless you want to do it." Yusei nodded, careful not to make eye contact with Jack after their little exchange.

Thoughts swirled through Yusei's head as he listened to Jack talk. "Why would he touch me…I'm disgusting…who wants to touch something as filthy as me?" Careful not to voice these thoughts, Yusei watched as Jack picked up the single bag Crow had packed before following him out the door. Just as they reached the steps, Crow came out and hugged Yusei from behind lightly. "Don't worry…we'll always be here…don't be a stranger pal." Yusei blinked slowly as tears welled in his eyes before swallowing so as not to cry. His throat felt thick as he answered his friend. "Ah…"

When Crow released him, Yusei went down the stairs and to the parking lot, trying not to think about the last time he had climbed those stairs. Jack was waiting by the car for him, bag already in the trunk. The blonde held the door open for him, the blackette sliding into the passenger seat slowly. "We'll be home shortly." With that, Jack closed the door and hopped in the driver's side before speeding away down the dark streets. Yusei stared out the window at the small flashes of light that were the street lamps.

True to his words, they were at the pent house in less than thirty minutes. Stepping out of the car quickly, Yusei examined the large building that was home to Jack Atlas. Jack pulled the bag from the trunk and slung it over his shoulder before going to stand next to Yusei. "Welcome home." Yusei cut his unbandaged eye to Jack and nodded slightly both in acknowledgement and as though to say 'lead the way'. Jack did so quickly, taking Yusei in through the back of the building.

"I had a feeling you wouldn't want to be seen so we'll take the back where no one will be working." Yusei nodded tiredly and followed quickly through the back, up the elevator and into the large pent house that would be his new home. "Here's your room." He was led to a large room decorated in blacks and brilliant yellow's will dark blue on the large king sized bed. "Get some rest and we will talk in the morning alright Yusei?" Yusei barely caught what the blonde said as he took in the room and amount of space being given over to him. "Thank you…I'm…I'm going to take a shower." Jack nodded and set the bag on the bed before motioning to a door that contained the bathroom. Yusei hurried into the room, closing and locking the door behind him.

He didn't go in further though, instead he listened for the retreating footsteps that signaled jack had left his room. Once he was sure he was alone, Yusei walked further into the huge glorious bathroom. Letting himself take in the aw that was the room, he looked around for a moment before moving quickly, not knowing how long he would have till Jack would come check on him.

Pulling open cabinet after cabinet he finally yanked out something that could end his suffering and give him the pain he wanted so desperately to inflict on himself. This freedom would come in the form of a razor. Breaking the head, he pulled out the thin piece of sharpened metal and held it over his arm. "Write what you are….say what you are….you know what you are!" Screaming these words in his mind, he wrote into his arm exactly what he was.

Filthy….

"Filthy…."

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Waaaaaah Q_Q I cried so hard while finishing that! I am so sorry Yusei!

But, hopefully I was able to get across how our precious blackette is feeling.

Please leave a review so that I know if you all like where this story is going or if I am going to far!

Thank you!