'GERARD HOW COULD YOU FUCKING SAY THAT?' Frank exclaimed. He couldn't believe Gerard could be so wrong. 'THAT'S THE BIGGEST BULSHIT EVER!'

Gerard dropped his head. 'I wouldn't be suffering here then. I wish the doctors came to you on time. But, fuck, they did not!'

'But we'll meet again when your time comes! And it's not now! The doctors, you can't blame them...' Frank said, hoping Gerard would understand the emotion in his voice when he said it.

'Thing is, you won't stay there forever! Once you're buried, you'll move on to heaven! And heaven... I don't deserve it.'

'Yeah but that will take some time, right? And Gerard you deserve heaven more than anyone! Don't think like that, your perfect in every way and you DO deserve heaven!'

Gerard sighed. He just wanted to have Frank by his side. Things would be so much easier then. 'Heaven wouldn't want me, and neither would hell.' He whispered. 'Come back, will you?' He knew that wasn't possible but maybe if he said it more then he would come back.

'Heaven would want you but hell would not! And, Gerard, I would love to, I really would, but I can't come back... If I could I would!'

'You always taught me that if you want something bad enough you get it in the end... But I guess it's past the end, isn't it?'

'It's never past the end... It's still not the end! It may never be the end.' Frank wanted to reassure Gerard but he has no idea how.

'The end… What is 'the end' anyways? It doesn't seem like 'the end' to you 'cause you're still 'there' but to me 'the end' is loss...'

'But what did you lose?'

'Everything I've ever loved.' Gerard paused, and then added 'You.'

'You didn't lose me and you never will! I may be dead but my heart and soul will always be with you so you can never lose me!'

Gerard knew this was true. But he didn't think this kind of presence was enough. But he really liked that Frank knew that he will forever stay in his heart. 'Yeah... You're right.'

Frank smiled; at least he managed to say one good thing to Gerard.

'Wanna know something?' Gerard asked, changing the subject. 'Viv and Mikey are gonna be babysitting me when I'm released!'

Frank burst out laughing. 'I bet it will be fun! Very fun!'

'That's exactly what Viv said!' Gerard replied cheerfully. Frank's laugh was the best thing he's ever heard. 'Oh, great! Viv and fun is disastrous!'

That made Frank laugh even more and tears of happiness were falling down his cheeks. 'I hope you will enjoy it! I bet it will! I wonder what she will think of!'

'Imagine she sets the tree on fire again! That would be really fun! To her. Poor Planty...' Gerard giggled.

'Yeah! Haha! But that tree was evil anyway! It deserved it! Imagine if this time she sets the house on fire!' Frank said trying to control the laughing.

Gerard laughed out loud and could feel the nurse's glare. 'Imagine that! This girl is unpredictable!' he said hushing himself.

'I think it will be you looking after her not her looking after you.' Frank was enjoying this. It felt normal, like the old times.

'Kay, I'll prepare the hospital for her!' Gerard loved making Frank laugh. Even though he missed him lots, hearing him laugh is better than crying in a corner.

'Yeah! I wonder how Mikey keeps her in line... Hmm... You should get some tips from him Gee!'

'I think he just keeps her tied up! But I'll ask him how he manages to tie her up in the first place!'

'Wow, Mikey must be strong minded to even survive. I think it's a bit obvious why he spends so much time at work!'

'Yup! Poor Mikey, when he comes home and sees her up and about, blasting music and staying up till dawn...'

'Poor Mikey' Frank agreed and sighted, remembering that he never will be able to talk to Mikey or Viv. That he can't see Gerard's face. That he will never feel Gerard's perfectly smooth skin, never feel his perfect lips again. He held back a tear. He wanted to do so many things, and he will never be able to play guitar again. Yep, death sucks!

Gerard noticed how Frank's voice dropped in tone when he said it. He wasn't sure what was wrong; Frank seemed perfectly happy just a second ago. But he daren't ask him. He didn't want to stick his nose into a spirit's business. 'We've been talking for a time now, haven't we?' he said, changing the subject. 'It seems like a minute, but the clock says 50!'

Think happy motherfucking thoughts, Frank told himself but he couldn't. For Gerard's sake he tried sounding happy. 'Yeah.' He didn't even remember how long a minute lasted so he had no idea how long 50 minutes were anymore. 'That seems like... A lot?' He made a random guess.

'A lot? Yeah, pretty much!'

At least he made a good guess, right? That must count as something. Gerard didn't understand how lucky he was to be alive, to be brought back two times. Gerard was very lucky to be alive and he didn't appreciate that! Frank couldn't believe that.

'Frankie? You there?' that was a stupid question, but still, he had to ask.

Frank didn't hear Gerard as his mind was replying his death and the times when he was alive and Gerard's skin and his touch. And leaving Gerard... Then taking the pills. 'Stupid motherfucking death pills…' Frank mumbled to himself, forgetting Gerard could hear him.