Naturalist: Pantera's Jungle

Ichigo wakes with a start, his chest heaving and his body coated in a cold sweat. He thought those nightmares would be kept at bay within the haven of Grimmjow's bed, but it would seem only the man himself could quell them. With a grumble, he gets up and gets ready for his hike to the mountains. He's not stupid, he never planned on just waltzing up to the mountains and barging in… he'll just take his time until he can figure something out. He glances at the book he's been reading, humming to himself as he takes a seat at the small table to read more of it.

As his eyes skim the words on the page, more about the jungle that belongs to this strange god, he sighs in frustration. So far, he's learned that the jungle is soaked within Pantera's magic. Everything from the water in the creek to the stars in the sky, everything is commanded by him. Ichigo is worried he may have hallucinated half the stuff he saw, maybe even his time with Grimmjow, but the tree house he now sits in assures him the man was real.

"Oh, Grimm," he sighs longingly. "I miss you so much. Where did you go to? God, I hope he's not hurt."

Shaking the horrible thought off before it breaks his heart, Ichigo goes back to the book. He turns the page and stops, his heart leaping to his throat as his breath stills in his lungs. He rubs his eyes frantically, those wide amber orbs staring hard at that the page.

"No… fucking… way," he mutters in shock.

There, standing bold and proud upon that page, is a colored illustration of Pantera… of Grimmjow. He slams the book closed, his heart thumping violently as he fights to hold back tears of both frustration and anger. He played him. He used him to his liking and played with him the whole while!

"… How could you," he whispers as the tears finally break free.

Ichigo cries hard and long, feeling betrayal wrap around his mind as his whole body screams to be scrubbed until his skin is raw. It was nothing but a game to the god, nothing but a way to pass the time, and Ichigo let him do it. The part he can't stand, however, is that he would let him again now that he knows. The self hate almost has him heading straight back out of the jungle, back to the inn to tell Byakuya to level the damn place so he never has to see it again. Unfortunately, that's not him and he could never take out his hate on this beautiful place and the animals in it. Oh, but if he sees Grimmjow again, you can bet your ass he'll take it out on him!

"You are so dead when I find you!" Ichigo hisses. "God or not, you don't use people like that!"

He's packed up and out of the tree house in seconds, stomping off into the jungle and toward the meadow without another thought. His rage is simmering, only growing as time passes, and his aura is so bloodthirsty the majority of the animals run away from him. Ichigo has never been used in such a way, has never allowed it, and he would never dream of doing anything remotely similar to another. He seriously had feelings for the blue haired man, but right now those feelings are more for violence than pleasure.

It's near nighttime, the edge of the jungle just making way for the meadow, and a crack of thunder from above rattles the orangette. His eyes gaze toward the darkening sky, lightening splitting the inky black and threatening a hell of a storm.

"Seriously!" Ichigo screams. "You haven't done enough to me, you just have to do this, too! You bastard! I… I hate you! I hate you so much it hurts!"

He drops to his knees, slamming a fist on the ground as he cries. He won't give the other the satisfaction of stopping him, he won't give that arrogant ass the pleasure of controlling him again. Ichigo promised to save this place and he'll be damned if Grimmjow scares him away.

"Give me everything you've got you piece of shit! Cause when I find you, that's exactly what you'll get from me!"

The winds pick up and throw him back, howling like an enraged panther, and Ichigo is forced into the caves Grimmjow took him to before. As much as he would've liked to camp outside of this place that reminds him too much of the man he's come to care for, Ichigo realizes that would be a foolish thing to do. He came here for a reason, but it wasn't to die of pneumonia in a thunderstorm. He sighs and heads to the bedroom, setting down his things and walking over to take a bath in the springs. As he's relaxing into the warm water, a bright light irritates him. With a sigh, he opens his previously closed eyes in time to see a silver shine retreating from the bathroom's entrance. A part of him wants to chase that glow down and beg Grimmjow to take him back, a part that makes him sick beyond words, but Ichigo forces himself to stay put and finish his bath. Once he's done, he strolls back to the bedroom and stops. Staring furiously back at him is the spirit panther, more beautiful than in his dreams and more ethereal than he could've ever imagined.

"I suppose you're here to chase me off," he scoffs. "Well, I'm not leaving so you'll just have to kill me now. Not like it matters anyway."

Pantera tilts his head in question, eyes of ice taking in Ichigo with such an intensity there's no mistake who they belong to. It's enough to get the orangette's eyes glassy with tears, though he's too proud to let them fall in front of this god.

"Either kill me, or go away," he snaps. "I don't have time to waste on you!"

He's surprised to see a flash of hurt in those blue pools, though he tells himself he's imagining it. There's no way a pathetic human like him can hurt a god's feelings, after all… he was just Grimmjow's whore. Ichigo almost breaks at that, yet his will is strong and he holds back enough to keep the tears at bay. The panther moves closer, but Ichigo takes a step back and it stills. After a moment, those blue eyes turn to steel and the panther disappears. Ichigo hangs his head, the tears finally dripping down his face.

"I won't let you hurt me again," he whispers to the empty room.

The next morning he's running through the meadow, hoping to force out thoughts of the panther last night and work his body into exhaustion while gaining more ground. It also serves to keep him from getting caught by the wild dog at his heels, which has been persistent on catching him since he stepped out of the caves.

"Fucking Pantera," Ichigo pants. "This is all his fault!"

He leaps over a rock and almost trips, but catches himself and keeps moving. The dog follows, howling in excitement and gaining ever so slowly. Ichigo turns to look back, just for a second, and tumbles straight into the stream he fell in last time he was here. He surfaces, sputtering and coughing, and the dog closes in with a triumphant growl.

"Stupid fucking panther god!" Ichigo screams.

The dog leaps, fangs ready to tear through Ichigo's throat as he treads water. For a stream, this one is rather deep and the five foot nine male can barely touch the bottom. Before it reaches him, an alligator breaks the surface and catches the wild dog in it's jaws. There's a cut off yip as those jaws crush the dog, the alligator so close to Ichigo that it's tail is coiling along his legs beneath the water. The orangette is left wide-eyed and speechless as it sinks beneath the water and swims off, Ichigo scrambling from the murky liquid in half a heartbeat.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," he murmurs continuously.

His heart is racing, painfully so, and he can barely breath he's so close to hyperventilating. That was the closest he's ever been to dying. Sure he's been around alligators and crocodiles before, but never a mere breath from them. It was so close, he could smell the stench of rotting meat on it's breath. After a moment's thought, Ichigo realizes that was quite random. Sure, it could've been a coincidence, but… last time he was here there wasn't a creature besides the fish. That alligator had to have been there a while, as he hadn't seen it before, which means it should've attacked him for falling on it. With a shiver at the thought, Ichigo gets to his feet and shakily makes his way toward the mountains. He's tired, but there's no way he can sleep after that.

"This is crazy," he mutters. "I'm gonna end up really dying out here… Oh well… at least it'll make a beautiful grave sight."

Ichigo sighs before picking up his pace, ignoring the darkening sky of night in favor of running through the tall grass and cool air. Just before he reaches the small area of trees he sketched Grimmjow in, however, he sees that silvery glow again. With a low growl, he forces himself to go faster and passes the animal up. The panther grumbles behind the orangette, the sound of it's paws moving along the grass alerting Ichigo to his pursuer. His legs are burning now, still tired from the earlier chase, yet he's too stubborn to slow down now. Pantera passes him up with a grace he only now recalls seeing in Grimmjow's own movements, the vibrant haired teen scowling as he comes to a stop.

"Leave me alone!" he shouts.

The panther god stalks closer, growling low and threatening, but Ichigo refuses to back down. His hands are on his hips as he cops an attitude with the god that rules over this domain, his amber orbs glimmering an off gold hue as Ichigo growls back.

"You were MIA when I was here last time looking for you," he spits out. "Now I can't get rid of your stupid ass! This sort of attention would've been great before, but now you're pissing me off!"

A paw strikes out, though it's not meant to hit him. Ichigo, on the other hand, dives for the panther in his rage. Not the brightest thing to do, but he doesn't know what's come over him. The panther leaps back, Ichigo landing in a crouch where it used to stand, and then they're glaring at one another. A strange pressure fills the orangette's head, his vision blurring as those blue eyes glow in the dark. A wooziness he wasn't expecting pulls at him, much like the lust from before but much less appreciated, and he passes out on the ground before the panther god.

Ichigo groans as he opens his eyes, caught in a forest he's only seen in his dreams once more. The panther god is gone, Grimmjow isn't there, and he's all by himself… or so he thought. Sitting on a boulder not too far from him is his own image, just staring out upon the scenery with a most serene expression on his tan face. Ichigo tries to get up, but can't move. He watches in shock as the moonlight strikes his figure upon the rocks, his eyes turning a brilliant god as a silver panther paw glistens on his neck and shoulder junction. A more feral and untamed look takes over those features he sees in the mirror everyday, a look he's never caught before but has felt every time he's gone out to find inspiration… it's just stronger in Pantera's jungle. The whole dream ripples and changes, Ichigo allowed to stand in order to see what's going on. His mother is in a hospital bed, his father standing beside her proudly as they're handed a little baby with orange locks.

*Awe, I was so cute, * the distracted male thinks.

"Honey, what's this?" Isshin wonders as he points to the baby boy.

Ichigo moves to look with his parents, confused at the silver paw print in the same spot as before. In the blink of an eye, it's gone and his parents are completely dumbfounded. After only a moment, they brush it off as their imagination… but Ichigo had seen it, has felt it's call since he could walk. The ground opens up beneath him and he's falling, plummeting toward a silvery light that never seems to get bigger.

He jolts awake, screaming as the weightless feeling is washed away. The orangette must've been asleep a long while, as the sun is just now rising over the horizon. Before Ichigo are the mountains, a pack of jaguars lounging nearby with wary orbs on him. He sighs and sets up camp there, pulling out the leather book once he's finished to finish reading it. It'll most likely take a few days, but he promised he wouldn't go through the mountains until it was done.

"Okay… the history of Pantera and his jungle," Ichigo mumbles. "Pantera had a human name long ago, before his death at the hands of that greedy human, but it's been lost throughout the ages. The jungle was visited by many who worshipped the great panther god, the temple revered as one of the most elegant and unique. Everyday, from morning until night, people gathered just to pray and see the splendid creatures that made the temple their home. But that long reign was soon to be interrupted.

It was a soft summer day, the panthers all sprawled out along the marble of the temple, when a foreigner came strolling up. They didn't fear humans, as they knew their cub had complete reign over this place. The human was baffled by their lack of care, asking about the temple and learning of the great god's monstrous power. He prayed for Pantera to help him, that he had lost his love through the hands of another and he wanted revenge. Pantera felt for the man, wanted to help him, but knew revenge was a foolish way to go about things. The man grew angry when Pantera refused, vowing to get his revenge on the great god."

Ichigo is confused at that, as it's utterly stupid to think you could get revenge on a deity. Unfortunately, he's been cursing the man ever since he arrived… even before he left the first time… so he can't say much. He knows he'll never actually get revenge on the panther god, but the thought keeps him warm at night. With a sigh, he continues to read from the ancient book.

"The man never came back, but his words grew heavy on the god's mind. He started walking among humans more often, started conversing with the tribes that lived just outside his small jungle, and that's when he met the most beautiful human he'd ever laid eyes on. She was everything to him and he kept her close at all times, showering her with gifts and love. Her name was Lyre, a woman so beautiful and kind that she had the misfortune of seeing so many injured or dead because of her. She went to Pantera in order to stop the needless fighting, asking him to make her undesirable to men. He, instead, brought her to his temple and kept her there to be his and his alone. She was never happier than when she was with him."

A bitter scoff leaves Ichigo's parted lips, his amber eyes narrowed in a scowl that could light an inferno. He probably used her, too! She probably only thought she was happy, just like he did, but was cursed with that damn aura Grimmjow used on him. If he had such a beautiful woman to love, why the hell was he using Ichigo for entertainment. He tries to swallow the bitterness, his eyes roaming the pages further as the jaguars begin to pace almost impatiently for his next words.

"The man who swore revenge learned of Pantera's love for this human, returning to locate her. He had found her gathering herbs just outside the temple's reach. With one swift thrust of his sword, he killed the god's love and walked away with a laugh. Pantera was so heartbroken and enraged by the loss of his beloved, that he sent his clan out to bring the man who killed her to him. He wasn't one for revenge, but that didn't mean he wouldn't curse the fool that angered him. Unfortunately, by the time they found him another had ended his life.

In his sorrow, his powers heightened and Pantera changed his jungle forever. The mountains rose up to cradle the jungle, meadows stretching for days and another jungle sprouting for good measure. Pantera had lost faith in humans with just that single strike, forbidding any with ill intentions to step foot into his kingdom again. No one has ever been back to the temple since, though the villagers rebuilt outside the new jungle and continued to worship him from afar. Although he refuses to allow them into his temple, he has been known to answer a few of their prayers. He may be a god of the wild, but he will always be soft at heart for those he was born of."

Ichigo closes the book, tossing it over onto his bag as he flops onto his sleeping bag. He wants to believe Grimmjow actually cared for him, but that just isn't in the cards. Not only did he practically toss him out after their wonderful romp through the jungle, but now he's threatening him! And he didn't even come see him when he came back! Ichigo growls low in his throat, huffing before wrapping himself tightly in his blanket to sleep.

"Stupid, Grimmjow," he mutters. "Playing with my feelings like that. He'll regret ever using me as his play thing."

He falls asleep without problems, but wakes the strangest dream he's ever had before. He's surrounded by blood, a man's body lying dead beside him and another man watching him with crazed eyes filled with a type of lust he'd rather avoid. Just as he's reaching out to yank Ichigo to him, another man steps between them. His body is ripped, his hair long and teal though styled messily, and Ichigo knows without a doubt that it's Grimmjow… he'd know his Grimmjow anywhere.

"Back off," Grimmjow's deep voice snarls. "Can't you see she doesn't want to go with you?"

"She's mine! I won her, fair and square!"

"She's not a fucking slave!" the teal haired god growls. "She's a human being and if she doesn't want you then you have no right forcing her!"

"Says the god that instills false feelings," the man scoffs.

"Bastard! Watch who you're speaking to in that tone!" Grimmjow bellows in fury. "As you put before, I am a god and I will punish you should there be need. I don't normally like pressing my status, I like being around humans, but I won't take this disrespect! Besides, my power doesn't instill false feelings, it strengthens those that already exist!"

"… I apologize, Pantera," he mumbles.

"Accepted. Now leave."

The man turns and runs off, Grimmjow standing statue still until he's completely gone. Afterward, he starts to walk off without another look at the 'woman' he saved. Ichigo stands quickly, not understanding what's going on as his body is moving without his consent, and his hand… far too dainty for his liking… touches Grimmjow's shoulder hesitantly.

"Please," Ichigo says in a voice he knows isn't his. "Please, help me."

"In case you missed it, I already did," Grimmjow snorts in humor.

"No, I mean… please… make me undesirable to men."

He had yet to look at Ichigo, but at that Grimmjow's head is whipping around to stare in bafflement. Ichigo can understand his shock, as… from the looks of their clothes… this is the day and age when women wanted nothing but to be desired and beautiful. At his complete shock, Ichigo opens his mouth to explain… though he's not certain how to, since he's obviously in someone else's body.

"Everywhere I go, everyone I meet," he sighs in that feminine voice he doesn't recognize. "They challenge and fight and spill blood and end lives… all because of me. I don't want people to hurt because of me, I want them to stop. If I wasn't so desirable, they wouldn't hurt and kill others to have me. Please… just make me ugly."

"… Even a god couldn't make you ugly," Grimmjow states with a sad smile. "Doing so would insult the goddess of nature, for she's obviously spent extra time on you."

"I don't wish to disrespect her, but… so many die…"

"… Have you ever thought of staying in a temple?" he suggests. "Men rarely fight over the temple women, because they feel they belong to the god they serve."

"Really?"

"Yeah, really. You could serve me, I don't have anyone in my temple save for my clan."

"You… want me to belong to you?" Ichigo asks hesitantly as his face lights up.

"I do. I want you to belong to me and no one else," Grimmjow states shyly.

Ichigo can feel himself swoon, yet he can also feel the absence of the pull he felt when he was with the Grimmjow he knows. Time must've hardened the other, as this man is far too shy and unlike the confident and arrogant pervert he fell for. Without even thinking about it, his hand is set in Grimmjow much larger one and he's led into the jungle of his dreams.

The time skip should've been expected, though it was the last thing Ichigo would've thought of. His smaller body beneath the panther god's larger one like it had been so much before, the pleasure so completely different it's frustrating him to no end, and everything is going far too fast. He can't recall half of what happened, only the mere moments before his body trembles with orgasm. At that moment, the moment he's filled with Pantera's seed, the panther god digs his canines into the crook of his neck in a vicious bite.

"Shit!" Ichigo screams as he wakes with a start. "What the hell was that?"

His hand rests on his forehead, his heart beating rapidly in his throat as he tries to calm down. Whatever that was, he knows it wasn't just a dream… it was like reliving the past and seeing it through another's eyes. Grimmjow… no… Pantera… was so different back then. So innocent and full of love for humans, just another type of creature back then. Ichigo can't imagine what it would've been like to lose his only love, but when he left the jungle the first time he'd almost bet that's what he was feeling. The only difference is… he knew he could just come back and see Grimmjow again.

*Wait… that can't be, * he shakes off. *I care for him and I have feelings for him, but… it can't be love. He hurt me, why would I feel anything but hate for him! *

He growls to himself getting up to take a bath since he won't be finishing the trek to the mountains right now. The jaguars are stalking around him as though ready to pounce any minute, their eyes never leaving his tired and sore form as he drags himself to the water of the stream. Ichigo sends them a baleful glare, challenging them and just waiting for them to attack. He's so sick and tired of this place's hostility, but he can't shake the absolute consuming need to save it. With a labored sigh, he eyes the waters for any alligators that may have traveled all the way down here, and then slips out of his clothes to bathe.

Lunch is a quiet time, Ichigo munching on fruit and a small vegetable stew he managed to throw together from things growing around the area. He has the book set on his lap, careful not to spill anything on it. He's startled by a tiny little mew, glancing at a small jaguar cub that's come to sit beside him. It's eyes are large and pleading, Ichigo catching a rumble of hunger in the baby's stomach.

"Hey little… uh… guy," Ichigo says uncertainly. "Here, are you hungry? I'll bet you are. But don't tell anyone, okay? It's not a good idea to feed wild animals."

He sets a small bowl down and pours in his own cooled soup, getting himself a warmer bowl as he watches the cub dig into the one set on the ground. Ichigo looks toward the other jaguars, curious as to why they're not rushing over to take the cub away. Surprisingly, they're all gone. The cub was most likely left behind, abandoned, or it's mother had been killed.

"It's okay, little cub," Ichigo murmurs. "I'll take care of you until they come get you."

The cub mewls before going back to it's soup, Ichigo letting his eyes go back to the book. Nothing great has been happening in it, just a recollection of past experiences other travelers have had. From the looks of it, Pantera has only gotten more frustrated with their trespassing and betrayal. He absently pats the cub on it's head, delighting in the thick baby soft fur there.

"I don't know what to do, little cub," Ichigo sighs. "This whole thing was a mess from the beginning… I never should've come here."

The cub nips his finger angrily, scowling up at the orangette. Ichigo sucks on his injured finger, giving the other a sheepish look before tapping it's nose with his uninjured pointer finger.

"Yeah, you're right… that was a little dramatic," he chuckles. "I guess… I'm happy to be here, all things considered. I'm just so mad at Grimmjow! He… he broke my heart."

The cub licks his hand and leaps onto his lap, curling up and purring to help soothe it's newfound friend. Ichigo sighs deeply, letting a hand trail along the soft fur as his free hand holds the large book open beside him. He's always been a fast reader, the orangette fascinated by the worlds books can bring about, so he's almost done with the dark leather book. The cub jumps on it playfully, looking up at Ichigo and waving it's tail back and forth while batting his hand.

"Okay, okay," he laughs. "I'll play with you. Come on, we can go fishing. Does that sound fun?"

The cub bounces around, Ichigo placing the book in his bag and following the mewling cub to the stream. As Ichigo tries to catch something to cook for later, he watches the waters carefully for unfriendly creatures that could threaten his new companion. After a few fish are caught, a feat in itself with the tiny jaguar jumping in the water, Ichigo calls the jaguar back to him and they head into camp. Ichigo sets a fish down for the jaguar, cooking the others so he can wrap them. The mountains might not have that much food, so he'll have to stock up before going. He reaches into his bag, looking to the book… only to find it gone.

"Oh no!" he gasps. "No! Where'd my book go? Old man Yamamoto is gonna kill me!"

His gaze catches the jaguar jumping in and out of a larger print, the silver glow lining it unmistakable. With a growl of anger, Ichigo stomps his foot to release a little tension. Sure he looks like a teenage girl having a hissy-fit, but he really doesn't care at the moment! He was one chapter away from finishing that stupid book! Well… at least he can move on faster. Unfortunately, that book was supposed to help him figure out how to get into the temple without almost getting killed!

"Fine, Pantera," he hisses with gold circling his eyes. "You wanna play nice and feral? I can play just as well as you! I'm not stopping, not until I've gotten what I've come for!"

The little jaguar is tilting it's head in question, watching Ichigo as though the teen has gone crazy… Maybe he has, he's not so sure anymore. Grimmjow is enough to send anyone down that path, though Ichigo didn't mind it the first time he met him. He sighs, lifting the cub into his arms as he goes to sit down on his blanket. He needs to figure out a way past the mountains, but the book said every path was closed off and it'd be too difficult to climb them.

"Maybe I should sleep on it," he sighs. "Hopefully, I won't have any nightmares tonight. Goodnight little cub."

The jaguar licks his cheek and purrs, curling up as close as possible to it's new parent beneath Ichigo's blanket. As the moon rises high overhead, that silver glow returns to the sight and Pantera frowns at Ichigo's stubbornness… a trait he had been attracted to at first. He sits and stares, his tail swishing back and forth behind him. His eyes have never glowed so brightly, his powers have never been so out of control. There's just something about this human that draws his more animal side forth.

*Damn it, Ichi, * he growls inwardly. *Just go back where you belong! *