Ryou's Story

By: ACE329

Summary: This story is mine to tell. No, not the one whom most refer to as Bakura, the spirit of the millennium ring, just me. He already stole my name but I cannot- will not- let him take away the one thing that I have left…my words.

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-gi-oh!

Chapter Five- Potential Salvation 2

Dark.

It was impossibly dark. It was like I had fallen into the deepest stage of sleep…except I was perfectly conscious. My mind was active but my body refused to move.

Not a single sound emanated throughout this black abyss. I could perhaps hear a faint numb ringing in my ears but that could have very well been imagined.

It felt like I was floating. Perhaps drifting through a shadowy hell.

Truly, I had no idea where I was. All I remembered was being immediately suppressed once Nameless found Yuugi, Jounouchi, Anzu and Honda on my doorstep…

So this is where I go when my soul gets cast aside. I had never been conscious before. It was certainly an alarming experience but what good would panicking do? I couldn't move, I didn't even think I could talk…

So, in the deafening silence, I remained motionless, floating, floating , floating.

Time didn't appear to be definite in this strange black void. It could have been minutes, it could have been hours until something happened.

"Ryou, open your eyes."

I felt like I was being ripped from my trance. I tried to turn my head in the direction I heard the voice coming from, but again, I was frozen in place.

"Ryou, please open your eyes."

Why did that voice sound so familiar? It was as if the repressed memories in my mind were scattering, scrambling to tell me who the owner of this voice was.

It was a female's voice. A girl's. I didn't know very many girls, except for one who was such a big part of my life so long ago…

"Ryou, awake!"

With a sudden comprehension my eyes opened, as simple as that. It seemed like the most obvious solution in the world, but why had it been so difficult before…? It was like trying to move in a dream and suddenly realizing that you could just wake up and regain control.

An explosion of colors met my unsuspecting eyes once they opened. Reds, oranges, yellows, greens- a flurry of colors was raining from the sky.

I soon realized I could move again. I was somehow standing, even though I had felt like I was drifting seconds ago. Slowly and uncertainly, I held out my hand, palm-side up. A leaf delicately fluttered downward, landing on it. It was a fiery red, tinged with splashes of sunset orange.

The first feeling that flooded throughout my body was confusion. Where could I possibly be that would allow leaves to fall from the sky as if it were raining?

"Welcome…to your soul room."

My head snapped up at the unexpected sound.

Radiant azure eyes gazed at me, filled with a childish delight. These eyes clearly belonged to the owner of the mysterious voice-a girl. Cascades of golden hair fell past the youth's shoulders, extending to the middle of her back. It shined brilliantly in the sunlight (which I had just become aware of as it all-too-cheerfully stung my eyes), creating the illusion that the girl was a glowing angel in the flesh.

A cherry red sundress adorned the girl. Its hem rippled slightly in the breeze that roamed throughout the cool air. I knew someone who wore that dress. She wore it the day she-

"A-Amane," I barely managed to choke out as my revelation hit me like a ton of bricks. I couldn't believe it. Was I dead? Was this some kind of cruel trick that Nameless was playing on me?

Tears of confusion, disbelief and joy began to trickle down my face. I felt my shoulders begin to shake uncontrollably. I raised my trembling hands to my face, not sure of the reality of the situation. It had to be a hallucination of some sort.

And yet, there she was, right before my very eyes. A familiar smile spread from Amane's lips as she raised her arms to me expectantly.

I cast my doubts aside as I closed the gap between us. Falling to my knees and throwing my arms around her small frame, it was then that I felt safe to release all the buried emotions I had ignored since my sister's death. Unashamedly, I sobbed into her shoulder, holding onto her for dear life.

Amane simply held me back, letting me cry. It seemed like she had the air of someone thousands of years old…

Nevertheless there we were, with Amane at least half my size, her body frozen in time while I had moved on and had grown much bigger. In fact, I was quite tall for my age, making the height difference all the more noticeable.

Breaking away from the embrace, I finally composed myself enough to ask the burning questions that had been troubling my mind.

"A-am I finally dead? Is it all over?" I won't lie, I was sincerely hoping that something had happened while Nameless had taken over, causing my untimely death. It's not like I had much to live for anyway.

But Amane continued to smile up at me, despite my appalling desire for death. "No, silly Ryou. As I've said, you are in your 'soul room.'" Although I recognized Amane's voice, it sounded far more serene, knowledgeable, as if all of life's mysteries had been solved.

What was going on?

"'Soul room'?" I uncertainly repeated. It sounded like a judgment room to me- perhaps my sins were being laid out to determine whether or not I was worthy enough to go to heaven (at least that's what my religion has me to believe). But Amane said I wasn't dead so why was I in this strange room, if I could even call it that?

"Ryou, this room is quite literally the reflection of your own soul. It reflects your deepest desires, your fears, your dreams…even the ones you're not aware of yet. Everyone has a soul room, but rarely has anyone ever had the chance to see their own. Your unusual circumstances, however, allow you to personally see inside yours. And I must say, it's really beautiful in here." Amane swept her arm out, encouraging me to look around.

This 'soul room' looked like a strange mix of the outdoors and the inside of an actual room. As I had noticed before, vibrant leaves were pouring down from the sky, which was a toned-down shade of blue and frosted with fluffy clouds. Occasionally peaking behind the clouds was an afternoon sun, which to me looked like it was burning from a raging fire. It appeared its rays stretched out like arms, caressing and engulfing the only tree that resided in this strange place.

It didn't take more than a second for me to realize that this sole tree was the apple tree from my childhood, the very one that Amane and I had climbed on and picked its fruit. I noticed that the tree's branches were bowing down, drooping from the luscious, blood-red apples that hung from them. Dew droplets clung to the apples, glinting off the sunlight to make the fruit appear to me as rubies. Oh how I longed to taste these apples, the forbidden fruit from my childhood!

Off in the distance I could hear the discernible rich sound of a grand piano, playing the most mesmerizing melody known to my own ear. The melody was slow, moody and enchanting, arousing suppressed memories to resurface from within me. Every time I truly listened to the velvety notes of the piano, swirls of images danced in my head, from enjoying Christmas with my once-intact family to transferring schools. It was as if this unrecognizable song, a siren song nonetheless, was the musical story of my life. It was bittersweet.

Gazing across the premises of this room, I found my beloved grand piano resting some distance away from the apple tree, playing its tunes by invisible fingers. I could see the keys being pressed down as if I were playing it myself, yet nothing sat on the lonely wooden bench accompanying the piano.

In another corner of my soul room rested a bookshelf. Crammed into it lay various books and my favorite board games. On one shelf I saw my favorite RPG, Monster World, neatly folded up into a board game box. The fact that it was on the highest shelf and the most concealed perhaps indicated that it was once my favorite RPG, primarily because now it was Nameless's favorite way to steal souls.

Lastly, there was a door that dwelled in the very middle of this topsy-turvy world of mine. There were no walls to support the door- it simply existed as it was, upright. It looked ordinary enough except for one obtrusive detail- in the center rested a large opening in the shape of an eye. A look closer indicated that this "opening" was actually a sort of mirror-like object without any sort of reflection. Odd.

All together I would say my "soul room" was (and still is) backwards, confusing, enigmatic and nostalgic…a very fitting theme I suppose. And to think my sister called it "beautiful"- that I can't understand.

And there were about a thousand more questions I was thirsting to ask Amane. Every object that I saw in my soul room raised exponentially more inquiries that raced through my mind.

"You like what you see?" Amane finally piped up after a few moments of silence. She was watching my reaction very carefully, perhaps curious to see if I was still in disbelief.

"I…don't know," I answered truthfully. "I mean, I don't know what to think. The fact that nothing in this room makes much sense…does that mean I'm crazy?"

Bubbles of laughter escaped from my little sister. "No not at all! It means that you're different from most people. You defy convention. It might also mean your life is out of the ordinary. I find that fascinating, don't you?"

I wasn't consoled by this explanation. "No, actually. There's nothing fascinating about having a criminal possess my body half the time."

Amane's eyes suddenly looked sad as she stared at me with a sincere expression. "I know it's unfair. But what doesn't kill you makes you stronger….you probably don't want to hear that though, do you?"

"What happened to my little sister?" I half-jokingly asked. "Kids your age don't talk this way."

"I know. That's because I'm not a little girl anymore. Once you die, you no longer take on an age- it's as if everyone is on the same level. Everything became so clear to me once I passed on, and I suddenly remembered all the lives I had before the one I shared with you. So in a sense, I became an adult several times before I-"

"Stop, please," I interrupted as I struggled to process the jumble of words my sister had just spewed at me. "'Lives'? You mean to tell me…."

"Well, yeah, isn't it obvious?" my sister smiled humorlessly, "And it wasn't a coincidence that the spirit inhabiting your body chose to possess you."

Now my mind was really swimming in this swamp of information. "I don't understand."

Amane looked at me sympathetically. "Ryou…that spirit…was you in another life."

No.

My heart felt like it had been put into a straightjacket at these words. I felt a sudden urge to vomit.

"You're lying," I managed to croak. There was absolutely no way that this monster, this vile spawn of Satan, could possibly be-

"No Ryou, I am not. As I've said, unusual circumstances have allowed you to encounter him. You've only had one past life, which was back in ancient Egypt. Due to tampering with magical forces that humans can't control, the 'spirit' broke off into two parts, one frozen in the past and the other…which resurfaced as you, many years later. So essentially you two share the same soul. The only difference being, of course, the circumstances by which you both grew up in."

I raised my shaking hands to grip my head in agony. I still didn't comprehend the information…or perhaps I wasn't allowing myself to. "B-but…he destroys lives, he can kill people…"

"It was a part of the culture your other half grew up in," Amane simply explained, watching me with her intense ocean eyes.

"Don't call him that," I snapped, completely revolted at the thought that Nameless had any connection to me.

Amane sighed, seeing my increasing distress. "Let's talk about something else. Everything that I told you will make sense eventually…but I can see that won't be happening right now. You are probably wondering why you are here, right?"

I willed my dark thoughts on Nameless to go away as I feebly nodded my head. "I'm also wondering why you are here, Amane."

My sister addressed my previous question first. "You have always had a soul room to retreat to whenever the 'spirit' took over. However, because your mind was so shut off, you allowed yourself to slip into a sort of unconsciousness until you were allowed control again. I feel you did this as a sort of defensive mechanism….it had nothing to do with the spirit hiding away your soul simply because he willed it. No, no one has that sort of power." Amane stopped for a second as she tilted her head in thought. "But I must say, he is quite manipulative to have you believe so."

I clenched my teeth as I struggled to regain composure. "You make it seem as if my misfortune is my fault."

Amane tapped her foot with mild impatience. "Don't be angry with me Ryou, but I'd say yes, it sort of is your fault."

I couldn't help but let my jaw fall open. "A-are you serious? Do you have any idea-"

"Of course I do. I've been watching you this whole time, ever since I passed away. Although I can't do a thing to help you, I can still criticize my brother for being so…submissive."

Submissive…?

"So everything the spirit has done- from mangling my body to trapping souls into figurines- you mean to tell me this is all my fault?" I was completely aghast at my sister's words. Was she hearing herself correctly?

But Amane stared at me unwaveringly. "The spirit's actual doings were not your fault. But what you chose to do about it is. Do you honestly believe throwing around weak pleas for mercy will do anything? 'Please don't,' 'stop hurting them,' 'why are you doing this?'- what's so convincing about a few empty words?"

Truthfully, I was getting upset, despite the fact I was talking to my dead sister whom I had missed dearly moments before. "Well what would you propose I do about it, Amane?"

My sister continued to stare at me, through my soul. "Stop being the victim."

I will never forget those words, even to this day, as I sit and reflect upon my actions. How those words have irrevocably influenced my life! I feel as if every small rebellion I have thrust upon my "darker half" was due to those few wise words.

Finally I had willed myself to speak. "You're here to convince me that I'm not as powerless as I think, aren't you?"

Approvingly, Amane nodded her head. "Exactly. Do you see that mirror right there?" My sister flicked her hand towards the floating door I was inspecting earlier. As I had already observed, a mirror-like object rested in the center.

"Yes. Why?" It was creeping me out. It clearly wasn't showing any reflection, but rather, a collage of moving objects from somewhere else.

"Look closer. It should remind you of something oddly familiar."

As I leaned in, I noticed that this looking glass wasn't showing random images at all. In fact, it was as if I had been seeing through someone else's eyes.

As I began to recognize the forms before me, I became more and more horrified.

No, this mirror wasn't displaying an aimless collection of my memories, or anything of that sort- I was literally looking through Nameless's eyes.

I could see Yuugi, Anzu, Jounouchi and Honda- only they were downsized into miniatures. I could see the horror in their eyes as they struggled to survive on the game board Nameless had cast them on. I could see the computer screen that calculated the technicalities of Monster World, the game my friends were forced to role play to the extreme. I could see many other game board pieces, which were undoubtedly hosting the souls of other trapped individuals.

And I could see someone actually fighting against Nameless- with a confidence I had never seen before in my life.

It was Yuugi who was facing Nameless on the other side of the game board- and at the same time, it wasn't. It couldn't be. The Yuugi I had become friends with was trapped in a figurine, fighting alongside his friends.

Then who was the person I was looking at…? Yuugi's typical violet eyes were instead reflecting an almost crimson hue, and they dared Nameless to attack.

It definitely was not Yuugi.

Then I remembered the puzzle Yuugi always carried around his neck. Could he have been possessed by a spirit too?

He definitely was- how else could he be fighting on the game board and combating Nameless?

For a moment I feared that the spirit of Yuugi's puzzle was evil as well- maybe he fought to win my ring. But then again, if such were the case, if I had control over my body, I would have probably just thrown it at him, screaming, "Take it!"

As it turned out, it didn't take me long to discover that no, this spirit did not have any desire to steal away my ring.

He fought for the life of his host- Yuugi- and the rest of his friends.

I saw it in the way he gazed at the miniatures before him. Every time the game was swayed in Nameless's favor, this odd spirit would appear absolutely dismayed, distraught over the fact that four souls were in danger. He understood that losing the game would cause the teens to lose their lives as well, and so this spirit clearly gave his strongest effort.

I couldn't understand it.

So Yuugi was in an identical situation as me- only the spirit he was stuck with turned out to be some sort of heroic protector.

And what did that make mine?

That's easy- a sadistic, cruel, vindictive, bloodthirsty sprite who lusts after destruction (if you had not noticed earlier, I will happily throw names at the spirit of the ring whenever opportunity strikes).

Despite the spirit of the puzzle's fiercest efforts to fight against Nameless, I could tell that it would be an ill-fated battle.

Not because this spirit lacked gaming skills (which couldn't be farther from the truth), but predictably, Nameless had the game rigged from the beginning and has a penchant towards cheating.

I believe that the spirit of the puzzle knew this too. However, like a true gamer, he kept his head held high and fought on bravely, relying heavily on 'Lady Luck.'

Seeing enough, I turned my head away, not wishing to see the outcome of this match. Judging from the position Nameless's miniature was in, he was about to strike, seconds away from claiming his stolen victory.

"Why do you look away, Ryou?" my sister piped up, noticing my actions.

"There's not much more to see here. They're going to lose," I replied, as if it were obvious.

I was wrong though.

"Rarely is anything definite. Your friends will lose their lives today only if one thing doesn't happen."

"Which is what?"

"If you don't do something about it. You have more power than you think."

Uncharacteristically, I scoffed at this. "What 'power'? Have you really seen who I am dealing with?"

"Ryou Bakura, this is your body!" Amane finally yelled, "Don't you think you are entitled to some control over it?"

"Of course I do, but how?" I demanded, gesturing over to the mirror, "He won't let me through."

"Have you ever really tried?" my sister pointed out, folding her arms resolutely.

I was stumped. "I…I guess I wouldn't know where to start," I admitted reluctantly. To be honest, defying Nameless terrified me. Before then, I never had the nerve to even think about it.

"It's easier than you think. You have to will it," my sister advised. "Just focus on what you need to do, and eventually, at least some control should return to you. You've already gained consciousness in your mind- and that's the first step. Now you have to deliberately think about what you want your body to do. Use that looking-glass as a guide."

Glancing over at the mirror, my thoughts momentarily drifted. "Amane…what would happen if I opened that door?"

My sister's eyes followed my gaze. "That door leads to the soul room of the spirit controlling you. If you can open that door, that means you can automatically assume dominance of your own body. But as you will soon find out, it's locked. Obviously the spirit wants nothing to do with you as well, and he is a selfish creature- he would never allow you to gain access beyond your own soul room."

"I could have figured that," I said, talking to myself more so than my sister, "But I wonder if I will ever be able to get the door open."

"I'm sure there are ways," Amane alleged. "But in the meantime, you'll have to do as I say if you want to save your friends."

"Right." At this I paused, "Amane…will you always be here, in my soul room? I feel like I'll need you to walk me through this. And for other times too, since I'm sure there will be."

The corners of Amane's lips curved up slightly although her eyes weren't smiling. "It's not that simple, Ryou. I wish it were. But this will be your only time seeing me…I knew you really needed some guidance, and of course I wanted to be there for you-"

"But why now? If you can be with me right now, why can't you continue to see me?" I demanded, uncomprehending.

"Ryou, I wish we had the time for me to explain everything to you, but I fear the longer we wait, the more peril your friends will be in," Amane sighed. "So this will have to be our final goodbye."

Funny how cruel fate can be, isn't it? Right when my heart felt at ease in knowing that I would have my sister by my side, walking me through my confusing life, I quickly found out that I was sorely mistaken.

I should have expected it, though.

I remember how disheartened I felt at Amane's words and how I struggled for composure. I even struggled to form coherent sentences! Our goodbye was very much unlike what you would see in the movies…it was raw, unscripted, and completely abrupt. Like the frail-hearted human that I am, I cried until Amane, my little sister, had to hold me until I quieted down.

I can't even begin to describe how much I miss seeing her face.

That brief instance in my life seems like a distant dream to me now. Her caring but serious expression, which always made her midnight blue eyes appear like a calm ocean, is only a faded memory in the back of my head.

So many questions were left unanswered when Amane left me. But as it turned out, I had to throw my confusion aside when I resolved to come to the aid of my friends. I didn't know how I was going to overthrow Nameless, and yet, I was determined to at least try.

Time runs the fastest when you need it the most. I wasn't allowed the luxury of strategizing- instead I went for a more chaotic approach by doing whatever I could to serve as an obstacle in Nameless's endeavors.

To Amane's credit, she was right- regaining control of my body, albeit minor control, was relatively simple. The more focused I was in collecting my thoughts, the easier it became for me to sway the actions of Nameless as he wreaked havoc in Monster World.

I found I could make the spirit fumble when he rolled the dice. This proved to be especially useful to the spirit of Yuugi's puzzle, who needed every advantage he could get.

To me, the most interesting aspect to my attempt at undoing Nameless's game was when I had assumed complete dominance over my left hand. It may have seemed like a minor feat, but I remember using it to type out messages on my laptop to communicate with Nameless. Through the computer I warned him about hurting my friends and that I wouldn't tolerate it any longer. I had no clue where I had retrieved such nerve from, but perhaps seeing Amane had given me a confidence I never knew existed.

Nameless was shocked. He was completely thunderstruck, having no clue as to how I had managed to resurface from my unconscious abyss. His confusion was so strong, in fact, that I could actually hear his thoughts as they dashed through his mind. They came as a whisper at first, but the harder I listened in my soul room, the more distinct his words became.

'What is my host doing? How did he manage to escape the confines I had locked him in? How is he doing this? That wretched bastard will pay for this…'

You know when you are in the midst of action and you completely forget about the consequences that will surely arise later?

I believe I was in a very similar predicament.

I was so caught up with working with the spirit of the puzzle to defeat Nameless that I disregarded what would be a result of my "disobedience." I think that back then, there was some sort of wild hope, a crazy fantasy, that Nameless would be eliminated forever if he lost the game.

It's like I said though- the spirit who stole my identity is like a horror movie serial killer. He will keep coming back again, and again, and again, until nothing's left to annihilate.

So after everyone reached the revelation that I am different from Nameless, after we had succeeded in defeating Zorc, Nameless's allegedly unconquerable miniature, and after finally winning the RPG, I thought the worst was over when my ring came crashing down to the floor, momentarily uninhibited.

True, Nameless had skewered a hole in my left hand in the process, and true, I had almost died in the course of fighting for dominance over my body, but at the time I didn't care- for once in a long time, I felt free. I didn't feel a dark cloud hanging over me or some mysterious shadow lurking in the crevices of my mind…there was nothing.

And to further fuel my elated stupor, the spirit of the puzzle, upon defeating Nameless, had looked at me directly with a reassuring smile and said, "He won't be haunting you anymore."

Who was this hero? He had the air of a king, cloaked in confidence, regality and magnificence. Whenever a sentence was emitted from his lips, I couldn't help but believe every word.

He was wrong about Nameless not coming back though, but that was to be expected. Even in my dazed state, drunk off of freedom, in the back of my mind I sort of knew that my liberation would be short-lived.

But that didn't matter. What mattered to me was that even if Nameless returned, I now had an awaiting 'benefactor' to aide me.

The spirit of the puzzle would save me.

If I were unable to escape from Nameless's sinister grasp, I am sure that Yuugi's alter ego would do something about it.

Judging from his actions the day Yuugi and his friends were transfigured into miniatures, I would say it is in his nature to act as the proverbial white knight.

And it's good to know that I realized early on that I had an alternative plan to fall back on, because, that very day when Nameless had been defeated, he was sure to come back when I least suspected it.

That's where things get ugly.

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A/N: So at last, the next chapter will be addressing what it was that had destroyed Ryou's morale, which he had mentioned way back in chapter 3. Get ready for a roller coaster of hopes rising and falling, as I'm sure it will be happening a lot…
And I hope it's all right with you guys when I opted to sort of 'fudge' over the gaming scene with Monster World- I figured we all knew the story, but what we don't know is what happened before and after those events. That's where I come in, of course ;)