Scout can't determine just why it is he closes his eyes, whether the tight clench in which he holds his eyelids is the cause or effect of his monumental sense of pleasure. Either way, the young man spares a second and a smidgeon of his physical energy in favor of a slight jerk of his head to the left; thankfully for him Sniper is still asleep and nestled by his side, and, as far as Scout can tell, inattentive in the midst of his slumber.
Scout freezes in place, the lanky legs of the man next to him shifting just barely, kicking into Scout's thighs and causing the mattress to dip under their frames. The lust induced colour drains from Scout's face in a startling realization that it would be most awkward to be caught coddling such an activity. Scout loosens his grip on his tempestuous erection for just a second, taking another peek at the man who seems to still sleep undisturbed like before.
As a matter of fact, yes; there was nothing else Sniper could be, his mouth slightly agape, snoring lightly into his pillow. His body is askew and stretching across the plane of the bed (as was typical for him in his sleep). Scout had nothing to fear.
At least for now.
And so Scout continues with his enthusiastic stroking of himself, continues the arousal of his physical senses. He makes sure that his subsequent moans are stifled, that they are subtle. He sees to it their timbre is of the lowest decibel, nothing beyond a small gasp; anything requiring a more strenuous pull upon his oral dedication would certainly wake Jack.
Though Scout finds that the more powerful the preceding signs of eruption becomes, the all more impossible it becomes to smother his longing calls and throaty groans. It doesn't help that the violent jerks and their sideways orientation are also no longer enough to satisfy him, enough to stifle his exhilaration—and so Scout's body demands silently for more, and that he does whatever 'more' is, and namely harder, with fewer seconds in between each tug—
And so Scout heeds the pleading of his inner workings. He obeys the lure of his biology in hopes that the euphoria within him is to be a full fledged experience and not just a flare of horny delusion.
Though in his attempt to near the pleasure he literally strokes out of his own body, he loses his ability to bridle it all and instead adopts a blatant disregard for intimacy and the privacy it often requires. He gasps and jerks about as a high staggers within him, his actions growing quite loud, without reservation.
Scout's shaking fist around his length attempts to milk the last drops of his release from within him, though in his spent and weakened state, the motion is nothing short of pathetic.
God damn, it always felt so good.
Scout sighs, very much pleased with himself. Tucking his arms behind his head, he falls back against the pillow. The thin sheets are tangled in between his legs, wet due to the influence and aftermath of masturbation.
"Shit," Scout sighs, stretching out, a distinct stickiness in his inner thigh catching his attention, though only briefly. "Shit, that was nice…" he exhales again, shooting another quick look at Sniper. Still asleep.
"Fuckin' gross, though—" And Scout slides from the sheets, his feet touching the floor of the camper. Scratching his lower back, he makes a blind trek for the bathroom to wash himself up. He was never fond of the closure of sex or any of its related doings (unless Sniper was involved—though that is most certainly a different story for a different time).
Scout grimaces as his thighs stick together, the quickly drying semen that stains them working as a repulsive adhesive along his flesh.
He certainly wastes no time in washing himself up. Lathering his hands with soap, Scout takes care of the remains of his business—his eyes are even still lidded from that same transient high, according to the reflection Scout sees in the spotless mirror (Sniper was very cleanly). He would change his underpants before slipping back into bed again, he plans, and with a smirk at the young man in the mirror, he turns to head back to the sleeping room—
"Y'GOTTA BE BLOODY KIDDIN' ME—!"
'Shit.'
Scout flinches and hides behind the bathroom door, the enraged grumblings of his Sniper audible in the sleeping room. It would only be a matter of time before the man would begin his search for the Bostonian, the very same Bostonian who is assuredly the cause of his late night aggravation.
Scout bites down on his lip as the displacement of Sniper's stomp upon the floor hints at his approach. In a fit of bravery on Scout's behalf, he pulls the door back, smiling nervously at the sleep shaken man who stands in the door way.
"What are ya, a bloody twelve year old who still can't control his damn—"
"Sorry," Scout interrupts him quickly, though the half assed, hasty apology doesn't seem to have changed the course of Sniper's rant.
"In—my—bloody—bed—?!" he snaps, tossing Scout the cum stained sheets, absolutely fuming.
Scout catches them, disgusted with the moist texture and its feel against his sweaty frame.
"Didn't your bloody Mum teach ya that it's rude t'bloody wank in another bloke's bed?!"
"S—sorry, I tried bein' quiet—"
"You, quiet…" Sniper scoffs, and Scout lowers his gaze to the floor.
"Sorry…"
"Sorry?! 'S that all you can say?!"
Scout opens his mouth to apologise again, but quickly decides against it.
"Look, I said I tried to do it without wakin' ya up—!"
"It wasn't the noise that was the problem— try rollin' over'n getting' a surprise mouth full o'your splooge!"
"Ew, man—"
"Ew is bloody right! You pull that shit again'nd I'm tossin' your arse outside—infectin' the van— "
"Oh what the fuck ever, you act like you don't have jars of your own fuckin' pee just sittin' around!"
"Jarate aside, all I'm sayin' is we're only on leave a week, 'nd you can't even wait until you're back in your own bloody bed t'jerk it! Fuckin' disgustin'—I'm not tryin' t'sleep in a sea o'your jizz, mate—what, y'got somethin' t'say?!" Sniper snaps, for Scout's dirty glare and mumbled response certainly did not go unnoticed.
"Just that you didn't seem t'have a problem swallowin' my cum when my fuckin' junk was in your mouth a few nights ago—"
Scout smirks as the Australian staggers just slightly in his expression and demeanor.
"'S one thing if I get t'join in on the fun, love; I mean, y'didn't even wake me up t'ask if I maybe wanted t'give ya a hand!" Sniper tisks and Scout turns a bright red at his comment.
"W—what—?"
"You heard me! You got some nerve, cummin' on my matress'nd blankets, soakin' the only place I got to sleep in your bloody man milk, 'nd I don't even get any enjoyment out of it!"
"W—what are you tryin' to say—?"
"You really must be twelve, love—why didn't you let me jerk ya?!"
Scout's eyes widen at the question, the fierceness and the legitimate mystery in his voice very much unexpected on Scout's end. Sniper's lips curl into a smile at Scout's flustered confusion, eyebrows raised to further emphasise his inquiry.
"You're seriously askin' me why I didn't ask you to jerk me off—?"
"More or less, yeah—or did ya not like it when—y'know, the other night…"
"What? Oh—no, no, I—I liked it…" Scout responds with care, wary to see just where it was Sniper intended to take this particular conversation. Hell, it certainly seems to have taken the angered edge out of him…
'Why is he lookin' at me like that…?'
"Nah, I really liked it, but—I dunno,"
"Dunno what?!"
"Pssht—fuck, Jack, I dunno!" Scout huffs irritably, a morsel of guilt creeping within him as Sniper eyes him sympathetically, a bit takenaback by Scout's sudden shortness. "If I knew I'd fuckin' say it—" Scout brushes past him, eyes narrowed, head shaking softly.
Scout pulls a fitted sheet from a drawer in Sniper's sleeping room, breathing moodily as he fits it carefully around the corners of the mattress. Sniper seems to be in no rush to further find himself in the company of the agitated American, and thus busies himself in the kitchenette—though with what exactly Scout does not know.
'How in the fuck're you gonna get mad at me 'nd just—ugh—'
Scout shakes his head, slamming his fist against the mattress, spreading the light sheets over it evenly.
'You throw your fuckin' pee on people—can't say fuckin' shit about nasty—sorry if I maybe rub one off in the same bed as my own boyfriend—'
Fluffing the pillows and slipping on fresh underwear, Scout shuffles himself comfortably underneath the covers, letting his body hit the bed, face puckered in sour moodiness. His eyes waver about the black room, everything cast in rich shades of either midnight blue or a pale white.
'It wasn't even that big of a fuckin' deal, you didn't have to get all pissed off at me—it ain't like you can't clean the shit off—and it sure as Hell ain't like you don't like it…'
Scout rolls over, staring at the relatively low ceiling, the rustles of the forest and its nightly activities noticeable now that his hormones no longer deafen his senses.
'Jeeze, no wonder the dude ain't married—you're stuck with'im a week'nd he bitches the whole time…'
Scout pulls the sheets above his head.
'Like a naggin' old hag'
Scout further fortifies his internal sense of innocence with silent snippets of self righteous mental monologues such as these. He pretends to neither notice nor care when the mattress dips and Sniper's sighing frame settles against it. Sniper has no need for any obvious signs of reaction from him however, for as he smoothes his broad palms over Scout's bare shoulder and down his arm, he can feel Scout lessen the tension that tightens the whole of his frame.
"Wos wrong?" Sniper chuckles softly, smirking down at the young man he caresses sympathetically. "Hm? Did I hurt your feelin's?"
Scout clenches his eyes shut even when Sniper leans over him, grazing his hands along his body and kissing his cheek. Though he finds it grows harder both in execution and resolve as the gentle stroking shows no signs of ceasing. Scout remains silent.
"I'm sorry if I crossed ya, love—was just a little peeved that you were all riled up'nd didn't think t'ask me t'help you take care o'your little issue—that 'nd, y'know, ya stained the sheets,"
"Look, it ain't always gotta be some personal thing, alright? Next time I gotta—whatever—I'll ask if you wanna help…"
"Oi, y'mean that, or are ya jus' tryin' to shut me up?" Sniper chuckles in Scout's ear, the tips of his fingers dragging affectionately across his cheek.
"Dude, whatever; I'm just tryin' to sleep…" Scout snaps, but curls against Sniper nonetheless.
"Sure, I was jus' tryin' t'sleep too, but when you're woken up unexpectedly—" Scout places the palm of his hand to hush him, rolling his eyes as he retreats into the comfort of both the embrace and bed.
"What were y'even thinkin' about t'get ya all wound up?" Sniper smirks, laughing softly at Scout's reddening face and the nervous tug of his teeth against his bottom lip. "'Nd why d'you keep forgettin' that any fantasy o'yours I'll—"
Scout shushes him again, and Sniper acts upon his lover's cue, leaving it at that.
-
"Aw, 'S'alright, love," Sniper whispers in Scout's ear, kissing his temple and running a hand along his arm.
Scout sighs and shrugs slightly, his fingers still curled around the crushed photo whose corners dig small incisions into his sweating palms.
Scout puts up no resistance to Sniper unfurling his lightly clenched fingers. His eyes still remain firm in their intensive bore on the linens that surround them in drowsy uniform, his other hand curling in the against the strands of fabric.
"So you ain't mad?"
It was rare for Scout to sit in such spells of hesitancy, waiting for Sniper to nod whatever Scout's sin of the time was off carelessly, settling his mind free of moral obligation and retrospect. Reliant on the wave of his hand, Scout says nothing, awaiting a sign of validation from the Australian.
'What was there to be mad about?'
"Well—I'm—I'm just glad you had the courtesy t'use a sock this time!"
Scout whitens at Sniper's chuckle; the colour that fills his flushed cheeks actually drains from his strained features at Sniper's comment, and the Australian clears his throat in silent apology.
"So I didn't get a face full o'your man milk t'wake me up this time—'course this whole discretion thing ain't exactly your forte, you're still a noisy little bugger if you're gettin' your willy tugged jus' right—I mean, you've always been a bit of a moaner in those situations, so it's no shock ya woke me again—"
Scout groans, shaking his head in sluggish disbelief.
'Maybe I shouldn't've put it quite like that'
Sniper grabs Scout's bare hand, unbandaged and moist with the sweat of the young man's dull worry.
"Mnh? Wos wrong, love? I don't understand what it is that's got ya so wound up—" Sniper attempts to joke lightly, patting him still, though on his cover draped thigh.
"I mean—'s not that big o'deal! I know I might've gone off on ya for it a few days ago, but I get it—every man has his needs—so I don't understand what all the worryin' 's'about; don' tell me your mum never explained to ya why ya got hard every now'n then once you hit puberty!"
Scout raises his eyebrows, silent nonetheless. Sniper simply grunts again, taking Scout's crumpled photo in hand and unraveling it gently.
"Oh!" Sniper gasps lightly from subdued surprise, eyebrows raised as he surveys the laminated, semen encrusted card.
"She's—she's a looker, eh?" Sniper chuckles lightly, but it takes very little time for his attempt at humour to taper off; both from his own inability to maintain it, and also at Scout's unamused, queasy expression.
"Well, can't fault ya for jerkin' one over her; she's a beaut'," Sniper resigns, staring with deep intrigue at the rosy pin up girl. Red hair pulled back tight against her flawless profile in springy pin curls, the red of her cheeks does little to mask her pale complexion.
Her undone bra flutters from her chest, (being a lady of modesty, Sniper presumes, she goes to grab it) though Sniper can still see she conceals very nicely sized breasts behind the loosened garment. The garterbelt disappears well into her nightdress, aligned perfectly against her thigh—and those eyes, grey and wide with meek shock, they'd drive any man that looked too deeply into them mad...
The way they are plastered on you and only you, the way they seem to glow with abashed shock and yet a longing for her audience to further explore her flustered condition, Sniper has to admit, wraps up the scene in a very arousing display.
"I can see why she got ya all bothered, mate—she has a look on'er that could convince any man she wants'im—" Sniper sighs, giving the photo a final nod, though he chuckles lightly as he faces Scout's takenaback and instinctively jealous glare.
"C'mon, I don't think I hav' t'tell ya you're a beaut' too, Lawrence—"
"Dude, don't you ever call me a fuckin' 'beaut' again!" Scout snaps, though Sniper smirks as Scout's expression softens, for Sniper reassuring him that he too was just as enchanting does much to calm his pending rise.
"Oi, you shouldn't be the offended one, I'm the one sittin' here pretty much bein' told that I'm unattractive!" Sniper gasps in mock hurt, Scout leaning forward quickly.
"That ain't true, Jack!"
"I'm apparently not even jerk worthy—completely forget y'haven't wanted any lovin' from me in three days—"
"Nah, Jack, it—it's not like that—!"
"Calm down, calm down, I'm just messin' with ya..." Sniper sighs, bringing an arm around Scout's shoulder.
"All jokes, love..."
"You know I love you, right?!"
If Sniper hadn't been listening he never would have caught Scout's hasty question. Placing the photo onto the bed, Sniper rubs his eyes and gives Scout his full attention.
"Come again?"
"I—I mean—I'm still attracted to ya'n junk, so don't—don't worry or nothin'..."
"Worry about what, love?"
"That I don't wanna be with ya no more,"
"Why in the world would I worry about somethin' like that?!" Sniper asks nervously, a bit apprehensive about rushing into the answer—though it wasn't like he could expect an answer; Scout had been reducing any he'd given to vague shrugs and shaken sighs all night.
"I mean, you're right—I—I haven't been payin' attention to you..."
"Scout, 're ya bloody kiddin' me?! I'm not some insecure teenage girl beggin' for the validation, love; I don't need attention like you do—"
"Like I do—?!"
"I'm used t'bein' out in the Bush by myself for months, even years at a time, 's far away from civilisation as possible—"
"Yeah, but you ain't out in the fuckin' bushes no more, and I know you're lyin' if you don't think you like company—"
"I can't bloody stand 'company'—"
"You like my company—"
"'S 'cause you're one o'the few people on this Earth I can actually stand—Hell, I'd even go as far t'say I like ya!"
"'Nd I know you must be feelin' like shit 'cause I haven't been fuckin' ya—"
"What?! I—I'm not some sex fiend, Scout! I can handle it when you maybe—I dunno—want somethin' else—"
"What do you mean, 'Want something else'?!
"I can handle that maybe you just aren't in the mood, I suppose—I mean, I know you love me, 'nd our sex is nice, but—"
"So then you wouldn't even care if I fuckin'—just up and slept with some other dude?!"
"Oi, I didn't say that, mate," Sniper corrects quickly and darkly.
"I don't care if you up and slept with your bloody bat, I'd be devastated, love! But there's a difference between me givin' ya the ok to see other people 'nd you jerkin' it over some 2D hussy; you're so horny when you've got a hard on like that you'll wank over anything that looks at ya that way,"
"You're nuts—"
"No, I'm just not the jealous type," Sniper sighs, lighting a cigarette.
'Or at least I do a good job hidin' it'
"'Nd yet you just admitted to bein' jealous of a fuckin' baseball bat—"
"Oi, I don' like the way you hold it, seems like much more than friendship to me—" Sniper mockingly growls in a low voice.
"For real, dude, I'm bein' serious! I'm comin' at ya with how I feel, 'nd you're getting' jealous over my fuckin' bat, and you're just not takin' me seriously!"
"Listen, Scout, I can handle the fact that there're other things that get ya goin', if you follow me—I'm not callin' a marriage counselor over a picture of a pin up girl soaked in your cum,"
"Dude, that's nasty,"
"Just sayin', 's how it was when ya woke me from my sleep..."
"So—so then you're not mad that I—you know—over someone else?"
"Look, d'you want me t'start cryin' 'nd tell you we're through?!" Sniper roars, clearly growing frustrated.
"Jack, no! I'm just makin' sure so that you don't try usin' this shit against me in three weeks, cryin' 'nd sayin' I don't wanna be with you no more—"
"I mean, seriously love, I'm a grown man, I know you've got hormones! You're gonna find other people attractive, it's perfectly natural! If you were obsessed with me I'd tell ya to quit actin' like you're still in bloody junior high school—"
"But, ain't I technically obsessed—?!"
"You're in love with me; there's a world o'difference, Scout..."
"I guess, but—"
"You're in love with me; if you were obsessed you'd be sniffin' my underoos 'nd askin' me why I didn't call ya last night—"
"What in the fuck're you talkin' about, Jack?"
"Hell if I know; But look, unless you've been messin' around, it's alright,"
"Alright?"
"I mean—'course it's always nice t'know your boyfriend wants ya'nd often has a hard time containin' that want if you catch my drift, but like I said, you're goin' t'be attracted to other people, 'nd I'm alright with that—unless—y'know—"
"Yeah—nah, Jack, I'd never, never—"
"'Cause I'm afraid I wouldn't let anyone jus' come'nd sweep ya up, love..."
Scout sighs, drilling the tips of his fingers into the blankets, dog tags skewed around his neck, his naked body warm and flushed.
"Alright?" Sniper asks him quietly, the young man sighing heavily, nodding seconds later.
"Alright," Sniper hooks his hand behind Scout's neck, giving him a quick kiss.
"C'mon, let's go sit outside—don't like smokin' in the van."
Sniper retrieves his brown slacks from the bedside, sliding and clothing his lanky legs, cigarette dangling from the corner of his mouth. Slipping a wife beater across his toned chest, he smiles at Scout, who also busies himself with dressing.
He freezes momentarily as Sniper's broad hand massages his bare back, Scout relaxing instantly into the gesture. His shoulders undulate as Sniper squeezes them remedially, and instantly Scout's face loosens, stress noticeably seeping from his otherwise youthful skin.
"C'mon," Sniper jerks his head, running a quick hand across Scout's cheek and making for the wilderness outside.
-
"Gotta admit; 's nothin' quite like a natural night in the outdoors—that forest air—gets ya settled like there wasn't even a problem to begin with, no?" Sniper begins quietly, back against the chilled steel of the camper's exterior.
"Even if you aren't all that big o'fan of the wilderness."
Scout shrugs, eyes watering as habitual sleepiness settles into his system. The weight of his bottom sways and settles warmly against the solid, light earth of the forest floor, the soil encompassing his senses like a natural blanket.
"'S'alright, I guess; still don't know why you always gotta park so deep in the trees," Scout grumbles, sitting up despite his lethargy.
"Well if you prefer I stayed parked on the side of the road where any creeper can stop and prowl on us—!"
"Better than fuckin' bears!"
Sniper rolls his eyes, extinguishing his cigarette and flicking the butt moodily.
"Guess you never went campin', eh?"
"Like Luc ever took us fuckin' camping—"
"Prolly 'cause your ungrateful arse never showed interest in goin' in the first place! He prolly didn't find it t'be worth the effort gettin' ya outta your slump to try 'nd bother with ya!"
Scout shifts moodily, both in an effort to stop himself from dragging on the Luc discussion as well as conceal his silent resignation that Sniper's claims were correct.
"I mean, he took me once, but—Seriously, try bein' eleven 'nd goin' fishin' with the guy 'nd havin' his frenchie ass losin' ya in a fuckin' forest for eight hours while you an't got no food!"
"Eleven's just a tad too old t'be gettin' lost from Mummy and Daddy, love," Sniper smirks.
Scout shoots him a dirty look, but finds that as he goes to challenge Sniper his eyes are already engaged behind their closed lids, face pointed in the direction of the stars so ask to soak in the moon's natural shine.
"Fuck you." Scout settles with instead.
Crossing his arms and scowling as Sniper simply responds with another light chuckle, Scout's twisted face does a job to convey his residual moodiness, even as he lets the subject go.
'Shit ain't gonna be funny when a fuckin' bear eats us'
"So what's got ya all torn up, love?" Sniper mumbles, patting Scout on the knee and quickly falling back into his comfortable lean.
"Honestly, there's really somethin' eatin' away at ya—I can sense it,"
Scout debates on his answer—or whether or not he even was to answer—chewing on his bottom lip and surveying Sniper's snoozing frame all the while. It isn't until Sniper's "Hm?" a good thirty seconds later that Scout is startled out of his dazed, unintentional stare and admiration of the rugged Australian.
"I dunno," is all Scout can be bothered to muster up after a minute's pondering, Sniper however unphased by Scout's terse refusal to divulge his emotions as always when he felt particularly pouty.
"'S it still have somethin' to do with you'nd your wankin'?"
"Aw, c'mon, we ain't over that shit—?!"
"Obviously not, the way you're borderline shakin' over there—I know 's what you've got on your mind," Sniper sighs, his voice sympathetic as opposed to scathing or critical.
"Dunno why you're poutin' about it over there, love; You must be right stupid if you didn't think I didn't catch on—"
Scout throws the man a sarcastic grin, the upturned sneer coupled with a brash flail of his left hand, the gesture resulting ultimately in a sloppy raising of his middle finger.
"Alright, alright, enough with the 'tude, seriously," Sniper stands, stretching and ambling his way to the Bostonian at a comfortable pace. Sniper brings an arm around his shoulder, eyes round and understanding, free from the obstruction of his sunglasses.
"What's wrong, love?!" Sniper whispers through puckered lips, his braced hand around his lover's frame giving Scout a slight, lighthearted push.
"Eh? C'mon...!" Sniper grins, clasping his hand against Scout's cheek before it settles itself into his hair.
"...I thought I finally had it all figured out, y'know?" Scout begins, laughing humourously and shaking his head. "I thought I was done bein' fuckin' confused; I thought, y'know—I finally knew what it is I wanted," he admits shamefully, his heart plummeting as he feels Sniper retract his embrace, his face stony and crestfallen.
"I—I see,"
Scout can hear the disappointment in Sniper's voice, the Australian scratching nervously behind his neck.
Scout certainly hadn't expected Sniper to react this way—though Scout's noticeable growth in wary awkwardness seems to demonstrate his soundless shock over Sniper's reaction over the young man's heartfelt confession.
"Yeah..."
"How long have you felt this way?"
"What way...?"
"Like—" Sniper's brow furrows as the words catch in his throat, and he waves his hand in exasperation. "How long have you known y'didn't want me anymore—?!"
"WHAT?! Jack—!" Scout stutters, and his hands scramble to clutch onto Sniper's front. Catching his weight, Sniper grunts as the young man leans against him, Scout's eyes darting about Sniper's face nervously, his breath little puffs of quick anticipation.
"I—I didn't say that!" he huffs, shaking his head wildly and glaring at the Australian.
"I—I—no, I didn't mean I don't know what I want as if I don't know what I want from you! Nah I meant I—Jack!"
Scout's toothy grin eases Sniper, the older of the two relaxing visibly.
"I meant, well—I dunno—I guess I was finally used to bein' a fag—"
"Oi, what now?!"
"But it's been so fuckin' weird, Snipes, it seems like I've wanted nothin' but girls these last few days!"
"What—?!"
"I don't get what it is you ain't understandin'—okay, so: I didn't have no fuckin' doubts 'bout nothin' until I met you, Jack—I always knew I liked chicks—banged enough of 'em, that's for sure—"
"Bullshit, Luc said you were a virgin if there ever was one—!"
"Fuck him, how in the fuck did he know, was he fuckin' watchin' me—?!"
"Look, love, no one with experience would lose 'is shit the way you do when I mess around with ya—"
Scout punches him in the arm, face a bright red, though within his eyes shines a guilt so furious that Sniper needs not antagonize him further.
"So maybe I only kissed a couple—a few—five or six, who knows now—felt up one girl's bra once, got my dick sucked by another—"
"No you didn't, Lawrence—ow—!"
"Ridin' 'nd suckin' dick wasn't even on my mind, dude! I was pretty confident with my skills with the girls—shut the fuck up, Snipes—'Nd man, I get deployed out here 'nd I'm surrounded by nothin' but fuckin' chesthair and balls, 'nd I dunno where Luc hides his Penthouse stash out here—but the next thing I know we're friends 'nd we're scrimmin' 'nd rollin' around, then outta nowhere I'm poppin' boners thinkin' of you—remember when we'd wrestle 'nd shit—?!"
"'nd the way you'd grind your hips into mine'n start moanin' but run away all fast when it hit ya you were doin' it? Yeah—"
Scout glares, but continues promptly.
"Well I was confused as Hell, Jack, wankin' over you 'nd callin' your name—"
"Took you two years t'just accept it for what it was 'nd let me play with ya—!"
"Yeah well, fast forward to last fuckin' week when I start gettin' a cravin' for snatch—"
"Ew, mate, d'you kiss your mother with that mouth o'yours—?!"
"Seriously, dick just wasn't doin' it for me—no offense—'nd I mean, damn, thinkin' of girls has me jizzin' harder than I have in a long ass time—well, except for whenever it was you were suckin' 'n rubbin' my junk or whatever—but seriously man, what the fuck?!"
Scout ends passionately, Sniper raising a silent eyebrow in response to the Bostonian's pressing question.
"Seriously man, what the fuck?" Sniper repeats disbelievingly, his face still coiled in a hybrid of confusion and disbelief.
"'s that honestly the question you're wantin' me t'answer, love?!"
"Just—Why can't I stop thinkin' about girls if I want dick?!"
"Oh," Sniper whispers, running a hand through his hair before scrunching his face in silent thought.
"...I don't think it's you so much wantin' dick as much as it is you wantin' someone who jus' so happens to have one—for the sake o'the conversation, let's just say I had lady parts instead—"
"What?!"
"Would you still be attracted to me?!"
"Ew, dude, it would be fuckin' weird,"
"Pretend it wasn't—! Urgh, y'know what I mean—!"
"So you're askin' me if I would still love you if you were you, but cut off your balls'nd got a vagina?!"
"Yes—I mean—No—!"
"I mean, I guess, I love ya no matter what, but that's still fuckin' gross—"
"I'm not askin' would you still love me, waaaahhh, but rather if you're attracted to me physically, if me havin' a cock had any role in you fallin' in love with me in the first place,"
"I—nah, I mean—I just fell in love with you, you know?! I didn't even think about that shit—I ain't gonna lie, I mean, it was fuckin' weird at first, 'cause it was like, I knew I wanted to do you, but—masturbatin' over you was the fuckin' weirdest thing, 'cause shit if I knew what it was two dudes did together, or what it is imaginin' you doin' to me was supposed to get me off.
Like, I didn't know how sex between two guys worked! And it was frustratin', 'cause I had these feelings for ya, right? And I knew I wanted sex, but I didn't understand, and—ah, it's whatever, it's in the past—but now I know what to do, and I likeyour dick—yeah, keep your dick, dude, it's fuckin' hot!"
"'S not the point of the question, Scout..." Sniper sighs, resting his forehead in the palm of his hand tiredly.
"I'm flattered—but you're not hittin' home, here..."
"Oh, then what was?!"
"Well, I guess—nevermind—a better one to ask would be if you ever have these feelin's for another bloke?"
"Hell no, slugger—!"
"D'you look at other men after having been with me for a bit 'nd see them sexually?"
"This might sound hella strange, but other dudes seem...gross, you know?! Like, it's almost as if you're some exception!"
"Right..."
"I mean, like I said, I finally just came out with it last week and said, 'yeah, I like Sniper's dick in my mouth—'"
"'Nd other places—"
"So I figured I musta liked dick in general, no? But if I like dick, how come I've been thinkin' about girls this last week?"
The question resonates between them for a few seconds, and Sniper brings his thumb and forefinger to pinch the bridge of his nose, Scout eyeing the indentations his sunglasses have left behind upon it in the mean time.
"Well, first off, sexuality isn't as black 'nd white as you're makin' it sound; it isn't, 'likin' dick', or 'likin' good ole fashioned sheilas 'nd their own indulgences' as you seem to be convinced it is. Sexuality is very, very complicated—it's governed by your hormones, emotions, impulses, chemicals—biology, if you will—'nd you know how crazy shit gets when you start talkin' 'bout science,"
"So why do I wanna fuck a girl while gettin' fucked by you at the same time?! That's all I wanna know—none of this science bullshit!"
"That's jus' you bein' a freak, Lawrence," Sniper growls, his grin spreading as he catches Scout's eye.
"So uh, would ya—? Y'know, be willing?"
"I'm afraid not, mate—not into all that—or women; I wouldn't be able t'get it up to fulfill my portion of your fantasy—"
"You're no fun..."
"What can I say, I love you 'nd no one else—I have no interest in fuckin' no one else, either—'nd it's best t'keep things simple so I'm not sittin' here wonderin' why I wanna hump the girl while you pound my ass while you get drilled by a mermaid or whatever the fuck else ya got brewin' in your mind—"
"You ain't funny, Jack!"
"I'm not tryin' t'be! I'm bein' one hundred percent serious when I say don't worry about it—'s what I've been tellin' ya all evenin'—sexuality is complicated, 'nd maybe your emotions are just changin' around a bit—"
"They can change around all they want, but all I wanna know is if I am still attracted to girls, or am I battin' for team cock sucker now?"
"I swear your wordin' drives me up a bloody wall—"
"Hey, it's just the truth!"
"Well, first 'nd foremost you're bisexual, at the very least—even if I'm the only man you've ever had feelin's for, the point is you've still had them toward another man—"
"And do you have any idea what it's like, bein' young 'nd fallin' for a dude after years of likin' girls?!"
"Seriously?" Sniper asks dully, raising an unamused eyebrow. "Did you seriously just fuckin' ask me that?"
"What?" Scout asks quietly, Sniper shaking his head but continuing nonetheless.
"'Course I know what it feels like ya bloody idiot—as a matter of fact, I didn't even have the luxury of likin' girls—d'you know what it's like, bein' young 'nd knowin' that you were different from all the other boys?
Eight, nine years old, 'nd somethin's just naggin' at ya, an instinct; but you don't want to seem weird, and you sure as Hell don't want to believe you really are!
Then puberty hits, 'nd you get your pimples 'nd your armpit hair like everyone else, but all of a sudden Jeff Clift from next door—he looks different to ya all o'sudden, but you can't quite put your finger on what it is that's changed—so you wait for him, sittin' on your porch, waitin' for him to come outside, maybe ask ya to play—perhaps then you could figure out what it is that makes this boy so different now than before in your eyes—when, next thing you know, it's beyond obvious,"
Sniper produces a cigarette, shaking his head whilst striking a match, lighting the tobacco.
"Another one?!"
"Was a bit like how you were—denyin' my emotions out the wazoo, but horny as all get up—" Sniper continues, ignoring Scout.
"How in the fuck is that anything like me?!"
"Oh, I dunno, maybe the way you spent the last two years tryin' t'have sex with me while tellin' me you didn't love me 'nd weren't a fag at the same time? That count?"
"Shut up—"
"Just bein' honest; you reminded me a bit o'me when I was still figurin' shit out—'cept I musta been about fourteen years old, 'nd just like you I was gushin' with hormones—I nearly hit the bloody ceilin' that summer, I grew so tall—but there I was; lanky, awkward, 'nd I always went shootin' with my dad instead o'dickin' around with my classmates, so I had the whole 'creeper loner who's eight feet tall who plays with guns' vibe goin' for me...
But Jeff from next door—well, he was only a couple years older than me, I'd gathered that much from looks alone—he drove, had this little thing—it was dark red and had a messed up muffler, it was loud— 'nd I'd wait on the porch for him to come back so I could throw'im a wave 'nd melt in a puddle of my own lust when he'd throw a smile my way,"
"Dude, you were such a fag..."
Sniper chuckles darkly.
"I know; Oh God, he had this square jaw, blonde hair, he always had it parted—wore these slacks 'nd those tight fittin' shirts—he played all sorts o'sports so he was fit, tall, broad shouldered, 'nd he had those green eyes—they were t'die for...
'Nd so I finally gathered up the courage the end of my fourteenth summer t'go over there 'nd introduce myself outright. Y'know, my name is Jack Mundy, live next door, don't have many friends, blah blah—now don't get me wrong! I may've been awkward, but I was a looker—I was just too weird t'take advantage of it. So it wasn't like I was on his porch with pus spewin' outta planet sized zits—it was just obvious that maybe I'd kept a bit to myself and was lookin' for a friend.
Jeff was just as charmin' as I'd made him out to be in my mind. Never laughed at me, invited me in for a drink, asked where I went t'school, what year I'd be headin' into—turns out we both attended the same secondary school—'course he was a couple years ahead o'me, but I was absolutely ecstatic to hear the news—but we got to talkin', bein' better friends, 'nd it wasn't long before I was head over heels for the bloke—"
"D'aw,"
"I didn't want to ruin my chances with him, so instead I just hid all my real feelin's for him; wasn't too hard t'do, you couldn't look at me 'nd tell I was queer, unless you could hear my thoughts. Although my father caught on that maybe I was just a little too excited over 'im, but'e let it slide, ultimately—'s long as I wasn't on my knees playin' with his cock in the livin' room my father just let it be—but let me tell you, Lawrence, we were inseparable, after a while—best friends if there ever were any—we'd do everythin' together, tell each other everythin' there was t'know about anythin'! 'Nd with him bein' my only friend it wasn't like I had anywhere else to'be, 'nd finally, during one o'our camps out to the woods, I told 'im how I felt,"
"Seriously? And what did he say, dude?!"
"Yup; Well, Jeff just looked at me real sad, 'nd told me he had a girlfriend,"
"Aw, Jack..."
"Her name was Mandy, 'nd I'd always seen her, always wondered if maybe she was a special friend o'his—she was the only one who Jeff would actually leave my side for; she'd spend time with us quite often 'nd I liked her, real sweet girl—well in that moment, I hated her more than I'd ever hated anyone else,"
"I bet,"
"So I teared up like a little pansy—here I was, admittin' to both him and myself I liked blokes—but he put a hand on my shoulder 'nd said, 'You're a real handsome boy, Jack, I know you won't have trouble findin' someone,' or somethin' like that—
'nd then it got real quiet between us, 'nd he started touchin' my face, 'nd my legs, sayin' that I was hot, the best lookin' guy he'd ever seen, 'nd that he would kiss me t'make me feel better, just once, 'nd that Mandy wouldn't mind—"
"And?"
"Good Lord, love, he did everythin' to me short o'penetration," Sniper recounts, eyes wide as the memory returns to him.
"Hell yeah! Snipes got lucky!"
"'nd so we went back home that Sunday—holdin' hands 'nd smoochin' in his backseat before headin' home—I was in heaven; felt bad 'cause he had his girlfriend, but I was gettin' handjobs from the boy I loved, I could only care'nd sulk so much—'til the next day at school, that is.
I was standin' outside in the hall during a break—'nd here comes Jeff, right? 'Nd all our schoolmates were shufflin' around, standin' about 'n chattin'—when outta nowhere, he points me out t'everyone 'nd calls me a fag—"
"What?!"
"He called me a fag, shouted it from the other end o'the hall—everyone was watchin', seein' what I'd say back. But before I could do anythin' he slammed me against the locker, 'nd pummeled me while everyone cheered on,"
"No way!"
"He laughed, 'nd the others weren't about to stop their entertainment, collectively disgusted by the homo Jeff was beatin' up—didn't take long for news o'the brawl to spread around the school, 'nd I went home, sore and brokenhearted as a motherfucker,"
"Holy shit, Jack!"
"I didn't tell my parents—I knew it wouldn't end well, y'know? Dad would wanna know why he thought I was a fag, demand to speak with his parents—But it didn't matter—the doorbell rang 'nd it was Jeff, lookin' like nothin' had ever happened, like a boy standin' in the doorway of his best friend's house, grinnin'—I opened my mouth to ask him what he'd meant by all that, but he kissed me before I could get a word out, tellin' me he wanted me 'nd couldn't stand another minute away from me.
We fooled around a bit in his car, 'nd I, like a giant idiot, was elated; I was worried he really did hate me, but we came together as always that day, washed up in a stream a ways in the woods, he gave me a kiss goodbye, 'nd went to pick up Mandy afterwards,"
"Dude, please tell me you knocked his teeth in!"
"I was in love, Lawrence, 'course not; but the next day, the same thing happened; he beat me up at school, drove me home after, jerked me off.
He'd wait for me in the schoolyard when no one was around. He'd beckon for me t'get in the car, all smiley, like he wasn't houndin' me, 'nd I didn't mention the bullyin' to him 'cause I was worried that he would get angry'n either hit me more or it would drive him away from me—as long as we were still touchin' each other, it didn't matter—even if it hurt,"
"Oh, Jack,"
"Well, my Father wasn't stupid—I had bruises'n hickies all over me! He wanted t'know what was goin' on, what in all the world it was I was hidin'. Didn't say shit, but I didn't need to; it didn't take him long to assume I was havin' a bully problem.
So he pried, pried, and pried, but I held my own. Behind my dad's questionin', me and Jeff would fight 'nd have sex, ad infinitum, right? S'long as no one knew, 'nd Jeff was touchin' me, callin' me beautiful, it didn't matter. I didn't care where or in front of who he was havin' sex with me, just as long as he was.
I made a huge mistake, lookin' at it that way.
We were in his car makin' out—my lips were swollen 'nd cut from him beatin' me up that day, still bleedin', even—we pull back, 'nd what does my dumbass say?"
"Oh God, Jack, don't tell me—"
"I actually saw the rage envelop him when I said 'I love you'—it was quiet, heartfelt—unintentional, but heartfelt. He roared and punched me until I blanked out cold,"
"Holy shit...!"
"So he drove me back home, tossed my body onto the porch 'nd told my father I was a dirty fag, that I'd tried suckin' his dick 'nd got aggressive when he said no, so he had to beat me up. I had come around my lips from when I'd given 'im a nice one, so the story wasn't exactly unbelievable.
I swear my dad brought me back to consciousness just so he could beat me back out of it.
'I won't have a fag for a son, you're filthy, dirty, I'm gonna get sick, how dare you disrespect me and our family—' heard it all, mate. 'Nd as my father slammed me into the wall that final time, I was done with it. I was done with Jeff.
That next day at school I found 'im at lunch, pulled my fist back, 'nd let him have it so badly my knuckles were bleedin' 'nd leavin' a trail all down the hall,"
"Shit!"
"Finally got in trouble with the school. Took a bit of actin' on my part, but I managed to convince my dad that Jeff was a liar 'nd that I was straight—our school's director finally called a meetin' with us 'nd our parents, 'nd the verdict ended with Jeff's expulsion, and my Dad givin' his own Dad a nice shiner 'cause he said I was a flamer—Mum was hysterical, she thought for sure they were goin' to call the police 'nd press charges, but they never did, they moved a month after that, and that was the end of it,"
"Damn, Jack..."
"You can prolly imagine the heartache I was feelin', no? Through it all I loved him, 'nd lost my best friend on top of that! 'Nd then my father said he wanted me to transfer schools, because everyone at my old one thought I was a 'cock sucker', lord knows he couldn't stand the thought. Granted I was never popular there, I hated change, and change on top of everything else overwhelmed me quite powerfully.
Still, I put up no resistance, and that fall, I was at a new Secondary school. It was in the next district over, so the walk was longer, but it was worth it.
My father saw it as a fresh start—and also as an unspoken chance to prove to him I wasn't a 'fag'.
I was pretty keen on the idea of not bein' one myself; I didn't want to ever experience anythin' like that again, which you can prolly understand—'nd everyone around me made me feel subhuman for my emotions, whether they knew they were or not, so I promised myself I would only like girls from then on out.
The first step to that was talkin' to'em, seein' what they liked—who better to talk to than my sister—"
"You have a sister—?!"
"Yeah, love! Leslie, she's a year older than me! I know I've told you about her"
"Dude, what the Hell, you never told me that!"
"I've shown you loads of pictures!—anyway, I approached Leslie about girls 'nd all that—she knew what had happened at my old school so she had some sympathy for me—told me everything she thought a boy tryin' to find himself a nice girl should know about women—at the time, it all felt foolproof.
'Nd you know what? Things actually went damn well, at first—made some friends, got a little job wipin' tables at a soda bar, saved up and got a car, did well in school—most importantly I'd been able to subdue my attraction to boys—sure, every once in a while you'd spy a cute one, or not wankin' became unbearable and so you'd break down—but the important thing was I wasn't caught up with another Jeff, 'nd my father wasn't accusin' me of, well, anything.
Like I said, havin' pocket money, a couple o'friends to spend it on, 'nd a car to go places with helped me open up a bit—even if the damn thing was shoddy.
There was one girl, Emma—she'd fallen for me completely, eh? I helped her with chemistry, 'nd I guess she took a likin' to me, 'cause she asked me if I wouldn't take her on a date—she was a cute girl, had dark hair, 'nd was obviously mixed with somethin'—I wanna say Guatemalan? Real beautiful eyes—they had a literal shine to them—I wasn't an idiot, I said yes, 'nd I took her out to see a little film that same night.
We had a great time, right? And so we started goin' on little dates regularly, when finally, around Christmas our twelfth year, she asked if I didn't want to be her boyfriend.
I loved her as a friend, I really did—but I was so desperate to prove myself to my father, to fit in, to not lose her, I had myself convinced it was a romantic love. I said yes, and with the largest smile I could muster I kissed her on the cheek and ran home to tell my father the news.
He was relieved and very proud, sayin' she was a cute girl. I was in the clear, 'nd it all seemed too perfect. For my eighteenth birthday he bought me the camper 'nd told me t'use it if the bed got too squeaky—dad liked his jokes—so of course I was on top of the world! Drivin' about in my van, getting' into all sorts of trouble with my mates 'nd with a cute girlfriend, to boot,"
"Did you do'er?"
"I'm getting' t'that," Sniper sighs, heaving heavily as he continues further.
"So finally, me 'nd her decided to take a nice little weekend trip out to the bush with the van—now, you know how young people are—took me until Sunday night to realize she wanted me to take her virginity—"
"Get some, Snipes—!"
"I got nothin' but embarrassment, mongrel,"
"Meaning?"
"Well, we were makin' out, 'nd things progressed, 'nd, well…"
"Did you fuck her? Huh? Huh?!"
"God dammit, I couldn't get it up, Scout! I had 'er all flustered'nd naked underneath me, and all I could do was sit on top of her completely naked with my limp dick in my hand!"
"Ouch, Jack—that's—that's bad," Scout winces, Sniper nodding broadly in response.
"Tell me you pulled a miracle—"
"I cried," Sniper smirks, laughing at the memory. "I started sobbin'—if there was ever a moment I knew I was gay, that was it—the girl is throwin' herself at ya'nd all you can give her is the most unenthusiastic cock and an unsolicited nervous breakdown,"
"Baaad timing, dude…"
"Oh, it gets worse; goin' t'sleep that night was awkward enough—'til the lass caught me masturbatin' to pictures of half naked men I'd had stashed under my pillow—don't gimmie that look, it gets even worse from here, too! Girl saw no point in me if I wasn't gonna be wreckin' 'er, so she started cheatin'—still used me for my car 'nd the gifts I'd been pretty much been usin' t'bribe her, by that point. I needed her to call my "girlfriend" so Dad didn't start getting' suspicious.
Ended up hearin' the rumours that she was sleepin' around from a good friend of mine—said he was some guy from another school—well, lucky for me, it just so happened to be our good friend Jeff,"
"You fuckin' serious?! You're shittin' me!"
"Nope! 'Nd the bitch thought it would be cute if she told 'im 'bout my little—er, blunder that night—"
"So she just cheated on ya?!"
"Oi, can't say I blame her, love; we were young, 'nd it was beyond obvious I was a little quackers. Maybe she just didn't know how to break it off, or maybe she felt too bad to break it off. Either way, it didn't take long for the whole school to hear about my studly maneuvers in the bedroom!"
"Again?"
"History just repeats itself, love—but the real kicker was when my Dad found out from one o'the fathers of a schoolmate of mine—he told Dad that I wasn't to come near his son because I was a queer,"
"And?! What did he do?!"
"I figured I had nothin' to lose at this point, 'nd so I told him the truth!"
"Did you at least leave out the erectile dysfunction part?"
"There was no point, everyone in Adelaide knew!"
"Damn, how in the fuck did you not just kill yourself—?!"
"I tried,"
"WHAT?!"
"Tried shootin' myself with one o'my rifles—Mum found me before I could carry it out,"
"Jack!"
"My Dad'd kicked me out 'cause of the whole ordeal, not to mention I was skippin' school 'cause I was getting' harassedagain. Dad said I was to leave 'nd never come near him or Mum or Leslie again, that he had no son; 'nd so I took the van 'nd never looked back,"
"Wait, what?! Hold on, you mean you haven't seen your parents since you were what, nineteen, twenty?"
"Not exactly; when my father kicked me out I'd only just graduated. I had no plans for my future, 'nd I knew the only thing that was certain was that there was no way I was goin' t'be livin' under the roof of my father's home as long as I didn't like dames. So I took the van, 'nd that became my home, love,"
"What the fuck, man," Scout scoffs, shaking his head.
"Seriously, this is some fucked up shit!"
"My sister slipped me a hug 'nd some money the night I left—Mum was breakin' down in the corner while my father shouted—I just grabbed some clothes 'nd a few little things, 'nd as far as I knew, that was it!"
"Jeeze!"
"'Nd so the Bush became my home; the only thing there was to do out there was hunt 'nd hike, 'nd that was the only thing about my childhood I actually enjoyed, right? Huntin' with my dad—'nd so I practiced my shootin' skills, used the time to clear my head, calm down—I'm tellin' ya, my years travellin' the Lucky Country were some of the best,"
"Really?"
"Oh yeah! You meet all sorts o'people when you've got nothin' but time 'nd a blank mind—'nd often times, you're all headed the same way,"
"Uhuh?"
"I had my time, sure, but it wasn't until I'd heard from a man I'd gotten to know named Vincent things really started to make a bit of sense—"
"How'd you meet him?"
"Hitchhikin'! Old guy was standin' on the side o'the road bakin', 'nd I stopped for 'im! Figured why not, I had the room, no? He had a real scraggly beard, skin like leather—dirt all over his clothes, 'nd yet pearly white teeth—ain't that odd? Anyway, we got to talkin', 'course—bloke was headed East, 'nd we had a ways t'go— but he started ramblin' 'bout the Australian armed forces, of all things—anyway of course the question about my hobbies 'nd intentions 'nd plans had to come up, 'nd I told him I'd been killin' time huntin' game—well, lemmie tell ya, this guy went borderline apeshit when I told 'im. He wanted me to pull over, 'nd show 'im what I could do,"
"Were you as fuckin' sick as you are now?"
"Come again?"
"I mean, you're a pretty badass sniper, even if I hate to admit it,"
"Well, I mean—" Sniper grins, rolling his eyes affectionately at the young man. "I had skill, he told me that right away—'nd this is where what I said about the armed forces comes in: he said I should enlist, that a shot like mine was goin' to waste the way I was headed; so he suggested I put it to good use,"
"And how did you feel about that? About, you know, becomin' a soldier?"
"Well, I was young, 'nd I wasn't doin' anything else, I supposed—wasn't too enthusiastic, but I figured hey, why not? If it gave me purpose, I didn't see what the big deal was,"
"So?"
"So I enlisted; talk to a recruitin' officer—went through all the standard procedures, like trainin' camps 'nd such—but again, my superiors thought I was an exceptional shot right from the beginnin'. The officers were whisperin' my name 'nd castin' me looks, 'nd somehow I knew I was gonna be goin' another way from my comrades,"
"RED, huh?"
"You got it—apparently it was some elite special task force somethin' or other—wasn't really payin' attention or givin' a shit, all I knew was it paid well 'nd that I was gonna be some super cool agent by the way they were makin' it sound,"
"You had no idea what you were basically signin' your life away for was all about?!"
"To be quite bloody frank, I still don't, love," Sniper scoffs.
"Sure, they say we're resolvin' world conflicts 'nd that we're fightin' for the interests of our countries—but nothin's changed, 'nd the way things are lookin', they'll never change…"
And Scout chews on his bottom lip as silence stifles the story telling mood Sniper had unexpectedly adopted, the Australian visibly exhausted by the recounting of his youth.
"Hey, Jack?"
"Hm?" Sniper grunts, eyes closed and head craned upward once more.
"H—have you seen your parents since then?"
"Mhn—Briefly; visited them durin' leave about seven years ago or somethin'—whenever it was my sister was still pregnant—'nd I remember it quite clearly, 'cause my father didn't say a damn word to me the whole time,"
"Yeesh, you'd think ten fuckin' years and his son becomin' a national fuckin' hero would get the stick out of his ass,"
"Heh, there're many things you'd think 'bout 'im…don't get me wrong, I telephone home every now'nd then, but I have a feelin' my Dad'll go to his grave disgusted with me; 'nd I just gotta live with that while livin' my own life, you know?"
"So then I guess I ain't ever gonna get a chance to meet the folks, huh?" Scout jokes, Sniper allowing himself a short chuckle and another handful of silent moments thereafter.
"Hey, Jack…"
"Yah?"
"You know I love you, right? That I'm never gonna pull a Jeff on ya…"
"'Course I do, mongrel," Sniper smiles smally, wrapping an arm around his shoulder.
"No, I mean it," Scout nods. "I really do—I don't think you're gross, or got a disease,"
"Sweet of ya…"
"Nah, really," Scout whispers, shifting in the man's lap and resting his head upon the man's shoulder "I love you…"
The two sit wrapped in an intricate embrace, saying nothing as the minutes grow larger in numbers and farther in between.
"I know I've said some horrible shit to ya, 'nd that it's kinda too late to take it all back'nd say it, but I love you, Jack, 'nd I won't ever leave ya,"
Scout's yelp of surprise is muffled as Sniper tilts his head downward, pressing his lips against Scout's carefully. Moments such as these were rarities from Scout, the full cooperation and affectionate attention from the young man being an indulgence Sniper could hardly say he'd grown accustomed to.
And thus the Australian saves himself the opportunity of breaking their contact by uttering any sort of words, eyes shut as their lips part only to peck instantly at the other's again.
'S not like I'd ever let you go if you tried'