A/N: Welcome back, loves! Another chapter, dum de dum... Oh right! Bella slept with Mike last time. That should be interesting...

Chapter Six: Time to Tell

"So? How's that lump you call a husband?"

I stared down at my bowl of soup, uncomfortable with the sudden shift in conversation. We had successfully avoided the subject of men for a good forty-five minutes but I knew it would come around eventually. Now, in fact.

"Hmm, yeah... yeah, he's good," I nodded quickly and risked a quick glance at Emily. Her face was gentle and open – she asked out of interest, not trying to rat me out. I licked my lips nervously. Since when had I been reduced to this paranoid wreck? Oh yeah, since I cheated on my husband.

"You don't sound entirely convinced," she teased gently.

"Oh, you know, with the garage and everything I hardly get to see him anymore." I could hear the lie in my voice. My tone was just slightly off – too high pitched, too clipped. But Emily just laughed.

"I totally know how you feel. Sam's always running around with an errands list as long as his arm. I can't complain though – the extra money from overtime is always welcome."

"Wish I had someone not to see," Leah chipped in glumly.

"Oh, sweetie, it'll be your time soon!" Emily soothed on cue.

I felt myself relax back into my seat as the conversation steered away from my marriage. I was under an enormous amount of pressure trying to deal with the guilt while keeping Jacob in the dark. I still stuck vehemently to my decision that he should never know. It was just better that way.

I picked my spoon back up and dipped it in my soup. I don't know why I did – I wasn't hungry. I hadn't been hungry at all for the past week. I merely ate to keep up the facade. The facade I knew Jacob saw straight through. I saw him watching me, trying to figure out what was wrong. It was just a glance, here and there, and then he would look away, a perplexed look on his face. Then, at night in bed, he would gather his arms around me and just hold me, letting me know he would be there to listen whenever I was ready to talk. But I would never be ready. How could he face me again if he knew?

That was the thing that killed me. I just couldn't tell Jake because of the repercussions but I had to tell somebody. I was going mad keeping it to myself. I could feel it inside – the shame ripping my mind apart. I had thought about telling Esme but couldn't bear her to be disappointed in me. But I had to get it out. Somehow I had to...

"Don't you agree, Bella?" Emily interrupted.

"Sorry, what?"

"That Leah should ask the waiter for his number. He's pretty cute and she's just got to put-"

"I slept with Mike."

The words tumbled out of my mouth at their own accord. My guilt had found its voice now at last, right here in a busy restaurant – great.

"Excuse me?" Leah exclaimed, her eyebrows raised.

"He's a client – no, a friend... from school and last week..." I began, panicking now that I had let it slip.

"Wait, wait, wait. Calm down, honey," Emily grabbed my hand across the table and stroked it with her thumb. "What are you talking about?"

I stared at my two best friends in bewilderment. My mind had gone ballistic – my thoughts scattered everywhere in frenzy. I could trust them. They had been my bridesmaids for goodness sake! But, they were strictly related to Jake not me...

"You can tell us."

I blinked several times. Of course I could. If I couldn't tell them who could I talk to? No one. It had to be them and it had to be now. Part of me felt relieved to know I could finally get it out there and push the overwhelming emotions away from me for just a short moment. I took a deep breath quietly before slowly beginning.

"I knew Mike from school and he just happened to become my client at work. We went out for dinner to discuss the project but his fiancé wasn't there, I foolishly got drunk and we ended up in bed."

I felt myself getting calmer just by saying it out loud. It felt so good just to say it. Not have to worry endlessly and try to hide my feelings. I felt a hundred pounds lighter, numb to the part of my brain that was screaming at me to shut up.

Leah and Emily stared at me in silence for a good ten seconds so I nodded my head meekly to let them know I had nothing left to say. I could tell I was blushing under their shocked gaze.

"Wow…" Emily breathed so quietly I almost didn't hear her.

"It was so stupid and now I feel so guilty," I began again when neither of them spoke. "It's tearing me up. What am I supposed to do?"

"Okay," Emily snapped out of her trance and switched to business mode. As the owner of a busy bakery she knew how to be logical and when to stay calm. I loved her right now. "Have you seen Mike since?"

"No, I asked Esme to transfer the project to someone else immediately," I replied.

"Good. Did you tell her why?"

"Good Lord, no!"

"Well, at least that one's sorted," she murmured. I looked to Leah then noticing she still hadn't said a word. She was just staring at me but it was not shock in her eyes anymore, it was livid anger. I felt my eyes widen in surprise. I hadn't expected her to react quite like that.

"Leah…"

She looked away from me then to her lap. I blinked several times trying to figure out what I could say to her. Jake and her were like brother and sister; she must be feeling so betrayed right now.

"Are you going to tell Jake?" Emily's voice broke my gaze on Leah. I shook my head quickly.

"I can't."

It was silent for a moment.

"I think you should," Leah said in clipped tones still watching her lap.

"Leah, no, I'm sorry but-" I gushed, only to be interrupted by Emily.

"Leah's right, Bell. He deserves to know. Sure, he'll be upset but you two were made for each other. You gotta work through this."

"But what if he leaves me?"

"He should."

"Shut up, Leah – you're not helping," Emily scolded. "He won't leave you, Bella. He loves Nessie too much. He loves you too much. But you have to be truthful with him."

The angst in her eyes was plain to see. She meant every word. But what could I do? Just mince on up to Jacob and be like 'Yeah, you remember Mike? Totally nailed him!' It didn't work like that. I would never be able to find the words. Emily must have seen the worry on my face as she reached over to touch my arm softly.

"Trust me, Bella. It will only get worse."

I nodded and picked up my spoon. Jacob had already questioned me about the hickey on my neck. I thought the game was up then. I lied – terribly – and told him I had caught myself on the curling tongs. I prayed he believed me…

"You're right," I agreed, stirring my half-cold soup. "You're totally right. I've got to tell him. When?"

"Tonight."

I tilted my head back and fought the sudden tears.

"No, no, no! I can't. I just can't, Emily!" I wailed quietly.

"Yes, you can!" she insisted. "Tell her, Leah!"

Leah's stony gaze met mine and I saw her top lip curl back minutely.

"Sure," she agreed. "A bitch like you deserves to get what's coming for her."

I felt myself flinch from the malice in her words. Emily furrowed her brow in annoyance.

"Leah, what's up with you?" she asked. Leah turned in her seat to face her.

"She cheated on Jake, Em! Why are you acting as though everything's okay?"

"She's our friend. She needs our help," Emily counteracted with a clipped voice. I saw her nostrils flare as she breathed in, angered by Leah's behaviour.

"Well, I won't give her mine," Leah cast a brief glance over me. "I'm sorry, Bella, but Jacob's like family to me. I can't watch you hurt him."

And with that she got up from the table, her hand skimming through her short hair and walked away from the table. I watched her disappearing figure in belief. My best friend had just walked out on me. Imagine what Jake would do...

Hot tears pricked at my eyes and I instant grabbed a napkin to dab away the water. I hated crying in public. It draws too much attention to you – everyone wanting to know if you're okay when you really just want to be able to disappear. Emily squeezed lightly on my arm and I heard her sigh at Leah's abandonment.

"We'll work it out, hun, don't you worry. Leah will come round and so will Jake. I swear to you you can do this."

I looked at her with watery eyes and smiled pathetically. She was right. I just had to tell him. It had been stupid to think I should keep it from him. Our whole marriage was based on trust and he deserved it now. I loved him too much to lie to him. All I had to do was pray he would stay with me...

I was sat on the sofa, my hands fisted in the material of my skirt like a six year old. They were cold and clammy as was the rest of my body as I sweated nervously. I doubted my sanity for allowing myself to be convinced by Emily to tell Jacob, especially with what happened with Leah... I felt more moisture spread across my forehead as I worried for the millionth time whether Leah had already told him and my world had already ended. She couldn't have. She just wasn't like that. But, then again, her parting words...

I shook my head. It didn't matter right now. I knew she would never do that to me, no matter how angry she was. I had to forget about it and focus on the more important things. Like the fact Jacob was due home in approximately five minutes and I planned to tell him everything. Not that I wanted to. I had spent the whole afternoon with Emily talking through my choices and every time it came back to telling the truth. There had been no way around it – I had to come clean or risk losing everything.

I had tucked Nessie up in bed about an hour ago and I had been a nervous wreck ever since. I knew what I was going to say – Emily and I had planned it down to a T – but I couldn't envisage actually saying them. How would I be able to force those damn words out of my mouth?

I froze then as I heard the car pull up outside. Jake was home. My breathing turned into quick, short gasps and I thought I was going to faint. Why did I think I could do this? It was stupid. He didn't need to know. It wasn't necessary. Shut up, Isabella, it was.

The door in the hall open and I forced myself to jump up and face the door.

"Bella?" Jake called out to the darkened house.

"I'm in here," I replied reluctantly. I hope he wouldn't see the guilt in my eyes in the dim room. I only had the side table lamp on and I prayed I would be able to explain before he flipped out – which I was sure he would do. He came round the corner then a small smile on his lips and his pullover in his hand.

"Why's it so dark in here?" he laughed as he made his way over to me. He took me in his arms and pulled me against his chest. I didn't know what to say so I just shook my head and shrugged. At this small gesture he froze and pushed me away slightly to look into my eyes. I looked away, ashamedly unable to meet his gaze.

"Bella, what's wrong?" he asked, suddenly wary. He glanced around the room as though there was some danger in here. Maybe there was. It was the bomb I was about to drop. I licked my lips and forced myself to look at him.

"Maybe we should sit down."

I shimmied out of his embrace and led him to the sofa by the arm. As we sat he raised an eyebrow at me in confusion.

"Okay?"

It was silent for a moment as I prepared myself. I ran over my script in my head once more. It sounded ridiculous now. No matter what I said it didn't change what I had done. So, I would just say what I felt – which was a difficult thing to do at the minute.

"There's something I need to tell you," I started, reaching out to take his hand. Being in contact with him made me feel instantly calmer, as though just his touch could influence my body. When I paused again he filled the silence.

"Okay," he repeated again. I opened my mouth to speak but couldn't find the words. I didn't know where to start. I didn't want to say what I thought I was going to. I was about to hit my marriage with a ton weight – I couldn't just say anything. After a moment, Jake's face twisted in annoyance and he squeezed the hand I still held slightly. "What is it?"

I took a deep breath. I had to do this. I closed my eyes so I didn't have to see him as I dealt the blow and let it all out.

"Last week, when I went out with Mike, I did something terrible. I've been torn up with guilt for the past week and I can't keep it from you anymore. You deserve to know and I deserve to be punished. I'm so sorry for what I've done but please just remember I love you so much I can't even begin to tell you."

I felt Jacob's hand twitch in mine and I looked sharply to his face. His eyes were guarded and he had turned slightly from me.

"Bella, what are you trying to say?" he asked slowly, I clenched my jaw and nodded once, building up all the courage I owned.

"I slept with Mike."

The room was eerily quiet after the words left my mouth. We were both frozen in place, waiting for the other to do something. Jake's face showed no emotion but I saw his Adam's apples bob as he swallowed once. After a minute of nothing I slumped forward slightly and pulled his hand close to me.

"Listen, Jake," I began. "I know this is a shock and I know I'm in the wrong but I want-"

"In the wrong?" he suddenly spluttered. "You're damn right you're in the wrong!"

He stared at me with his suddenly furious eyes and I inched my hand from his. I was scared of him now, watching the way his jaw tightened and his free kept clenching and re-clenching into a fist. I wanted to speak and tell him to calm down but I didn't think I should. I would just make him angrier. After a moment he spoke.

"Did you not, you know, think beforehand, like, I have a husband? And a baby? Nothing?" he paused for a moment and I stayed silent. "Come on, Bella, speak. You wanted to talk. Well, talk!"

He jumped up from the seat and stared down at me, his extra height making his actions even more belittling. I was suddenly angry. How dare he be so patronising? I wanted to discuss this with him like adults and he was just mocking me! I stood too so I could face him and twisted my mouth in rage.

"Just stop being so ridiculous, Jake!" I spat through my teeth. "Just calm down and we'll sort this out. Please? I love you, Jacob; I don't want to hurt you..."

He barked a laugh at that and looked away from me.

"It's a bit too late to think about hurting me..." he took a quick breath in after spoke. He was physically shaking with fury now, his body vibrating slightly while I watched. I walked forward and put a hand to his cheek, forcing him to look at me. His brown eyes were rimmed with tears and he swallowed hard when I bit my lip at the sight. He reached up slowly and put his hand on mine. His skin was hot and he trembled slightly against me. Then, he tightened his fingers around mine and lowered both our hands from his face.

"Don't touch me, Bella," he whispered feverishly. "I don't want you touching me!"

He screamed the last two words so loudly I actually took a step away from him. I fell back into the seat and stared up at him as his whole composure changed. He hunched over and pressed his hands against his forehead. I took a shallow breath in, wondering what he was going to do. Part of me took a moment to rejoice that he hadn't just left me. Yet.

Jacob suddenly dropped his arms and started towards me.

"You're a bitch!" he yelled. "You're a fucking bitch! You fucking..."

He trailed off and suddenly lunged at me, his flat eyes murderous. I leapt out the way, pressing myself to the arms of the sofa. Jacob had never reacted violently to me before – I was downright petrified. Realising he had missed me, Jake swung round to find me.

"Jacob!" I screeched, pushing my hands forward to try and defend myself. He grabbed my out stretched arms and began to shake me. "Nessie's upstairs!" I tried to yell as the world moved around me. Abruptly, the shaking stopped and I was plonked back down on the seat. My hand flew to my head, trying to keep myself upright. My head was throbbing and everything still spun around me. Through shaky eyes I saw Jacob retreating and I tried to sit up. His strong hands caught me and steadied me before he moved away again.

"You're right," he said calmly. "I mustn't wake her."

After a moment of dithering on the other side of the room he strode forward and came to sit beside me. I instinctively moved towards him and rested a hand on his shoulder.

"Bella, don't think this means I forgive you," he began and I froze. He looked straight down at the floor and continued with no expression in his voice. "You can carry on living here but I expect you to be gone by the end of next week. We will not discuss this; there is no room for negotiation. Maybe in time things will change but, for now, this is over."

Then, he got up smoothly from the sofa and left the room without looking back.

My world had ended.

A/N: Follow me on twitter Melanie18Carter or follow the Twigirls twigirlsnxtdoor, who I am blessed to be allowed to play with, for recs on some amazing fics written by much better writers than me. Those girls really do find some of the best in this fandom. Trust. ;)

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Mel x