It's time to say goodbye :). Not because I want to but because I am literally forced because my time is running short! Of course the option of a sequel is always there...who knows! Thank you so much for reading this story!

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Brooke looked at the pills when she suddenly heard a knock on her window. She was about to take one pill but then looked at the window and widened her eyes in shock. Julian, Alex' best friend, was sitting in the tree and smiling through the window. Brooke walked a little unsure towards it and slowly wiped her tears and then opened it and hugged herself and took a step backwards.

"Hi, sorry, I did not mean to frighten you but…"

"You did not.", Brooke lied. But in reality she was more than frightened. But she did not know whether she was frightened of him or herself.

"I wanted to ask you whether you'd come with us? We found a pretty great…", suddenly Alex screamed from downstairs.

"Don't ask her. Just force her to come with us. She'll say no if you ask her.", Brooke smiled a little at this comment.

"Um…okay. I force you to come with us.", Julian smiled softly but Brooke shook her head.

"Um…thank you but I'm not…"

"Look Brooke. How about you just come with us? If you want to go back, we'll bring you back. No risk no fun, right? And you can take those pills any time you want.", he said with a sad voice. Brooke reddened and looked shocked at him.

"Let's make a deal. You give me those pills and I…I mean we…do anything fun every day. If I manage to get you to smile just once, I don't give them back to you.", Julian said and hoped that this would work. He did not know Brooke but he could tell that she was in a lot of emotional pain and Alex had told him everything and it reminded him of his sister that was not on earth with him any more. Brooke hesitated but then gave him the box. He looked at it and then smiled.

"You realize that if you took all of them you'd wake up with a huge headache?", he held out his hand but Brooke took a step backwards and then took a deep breath and let him help her out of the room.

"So, what are we going to do?", Brooke asked and Alex slung her arms around her.
"You'll see."

A little later Brooke looked up at the roller coaster and shook her head, "I am not going up there.", she looked shocked when Julian turned the lights on and a song started to play.

"Well, it's my dad's park. I know how everything works. So let's go.", he took Alex' hand and walked towards it but Brooke shook her head.

"No. I am not a roller coaster type.", she joked.

"You dare to take all of these", he pointed at the pills, "But don't dare to drive a roller coaster?", he teased her and suppressed a smiled when she looked madly at him.

"Fine.", she stormed to the roller coaster and sat down. She was in the middle of Julian and Alex and screamed when it started and almost broke their hands because she squeezed them so tightly. But after the third time she held out her hands and closed her eyes. The wind blew through her hair and she had a small smile on her face. It was the first time that she felt free again. Julian and Alex looked at each other and then at Brooke and smiled. After the tenth round Alex and Julian gave up and sat down on the ground and just watched how Brooke continued driving the roller coaster. They heard her crying but pretended not to do so. Somehow they knew that she needed time alone. What they did not know was that those tears of her were tears because she was happy that she had not taken the pill.

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The next day Brooke, Haley, Peyton and Rachel were sitting in Rachel's apartment and watching a movie. "They are dead.", Brooke suddenly whispered. The girls looked shocked at Brooke and then saw the tears in her eyes.

"What?", Haley asked confused and immediately slung her arms around her tiger.

"They…they…the men…my…mom…said…that…and…it's….in…the news…and…", Brooke cried heavily into Haley's chest and the four girls hugged each other and cried for hours.

"Wow. Bitchtoria is getting usable.", Rachel said and received a slap from Peyton.

"Rachel!", Peyton said harshly and Rachel looked shocked at Brooke.

"I am sorry. I meant…well…"

"It's okay.", Brooke answered and wiped her tears. It was the first time that the girls had such an evening again and that Brooke joined them and actually allowed anyone to touch her.

"How are you and Felix?", Haley asked Rachel who took a deep breath.

"I don't know. I haven't talked to him for a long time now and I think he does not know why I broke up with him.", Rachel said as if this did not hurt her.

"Do you know why?", Peyton asked softly and Rachel just shrugged her shoulders. Everyone dealt differently with the situation and although they wanted to ask Brooke many questions, they decided not to do so. She was the one that was hurt the most.

"I think I am going to break up with Lucas too.", Brooke suddenly whispered and everyone looked confused at her. Brucas was the IT-couple and they would go through everything together. Of course they knew that Brooke pushed him away from her but they did not know that she wanted to push him away that far.

"I…I…", Brooke started to cry heavily in Peyton's arms while the others stroked her back. It was the first time she let it out in front of them. "Is it going to be better? Will we ever be the same again?", she sobbed.

"Well, tigger, Haley kissed Brooke's wet cheek and while Brooke's head rested in Peyton's lap and everyone cried. "Those bastards took a lot from us. Especially from you.", Rachel squeezed Brooke's hand and felt guilty that she had accused Brooke of using drugs at first. "But…but we won't let them succeed and we'll do anything to be happy again. Do you understand me, tiger?"

Brooke nodded sadly and wanted to get out of Peyton's embrace. It was too much for her but Peyton just slung her arms around her and held her in the position. "I know you are hurt and…and what they did to you…is…the worst and…but…we will be friends forever and I know that all of us are strong persons and we'll get through that."

"I am not a strong person.", Brooke cried again and looked up at Rachel who stood in front of her. Rachel was never the one that showed her tears or fears but the Rachel in front of them cried openly.

"You are the strongest person I know Brooke Davis and we love you so much, so please…let us help you.", she almost fell on top of Brooke and sobbed.

"They…they…", Brooke tried to form the words but could not say it.

"Hurt you?", Peyton ended her sentence and Brooke nodded sadly. The girls stayed like this for hours and slept in one bed together. Of course all of them were hurt but Brooke needed them the most at the moment. She slept in the middle of them and they held her tightly when she screamed and cried at night. Her wounds were deep.

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The next day Lucas knocked on Brooke's door but only Victoria opened it. "Hello Lucas. Come in.", she smiled softly and it freaked him out a little that she was so nice to him.

"Brooke is upstairs.", Victoria said and Lucas nodded and walked upstairs and knocked on the door. Brooke was sitting on her bed and watching TV and hugging a big bear. She looked like a small girl and tried to smile at Lucas when he entered the room.

He sat down on the bed and could feel how she stiffened up. It made him sick what those men had done to her and that the Brooke he knew was gone. "Do you want to go for a walk?", Lucas asked a little unsure. He did not know how to deal with everything. Of course he was there for her every second but Brooke pushed him away.

"Um…I would prefer staying in my room today.", Brooke whispered. She knew that she hurt him and it was not her intention but right now she could not be close to anyone. She did not want anybody touching her or holding her tightly and she knew that Lucas wanted that.

"Could I watch TV with you?", he asked unsure again and Brooke hesitated but nodded. He sat down on the bed besides her and took care that he left some space between them. He knew that she needed that.

"How about your favorite show?", Lucas asked and Brooke looked shocked at him.

"You hate that show.", she said and he smiled at her.

"Well, I've never seen one episode, so maybe it's not as bad as I think it is.", he smiled and went to the DVD player. After one hour Brooke cuddled a little closer to him and suddenly kissed him. Lucas kissed her back but then realized what she was doing. She tried to open his jeans and took off her own shirt and her bra and went under his shirt. Lucas immediately pushed her backwards and stopped her from doing what she wanted to do.

"Brooke…", he whispered. She looked shocked at him and then cried.

"You think I am disgusting. I understand. I am…I am so disgusting and dirty...", she cried and Lucas took away her hands that were in front of her face and looked down at his broke girlfriend.

"You are in no way disgusting. Trust me. I would love you to touch me or touch you. I miss that but I know you are not ready. And until you aren't, I'll wait. I don't want us to be intimate again to prove anything. I love every part of your body. I love this nose.", he kissed her nose softly. "I love this ear.", he kissed her ear, "I love this gorgeous mouth.", he kissed her mouth, "I love your amazing sad eyes,", he kissed her eyelid, "I love your stomach.", he kissed her stomach, "and I love everything else but what I love the most is this.", he took his hand onto her chest. "I love your heart the most.", he had tears in his eyes and wiped Brooke's. "And if I could, I would turn back time. It kills me to see how much you suffer but I want you to know that I'll be there for you. No matter what. If you tell me that you need some time apart then it's okay. If you tell me that you want me to be with you every second, then it's okay. But please tell me the truth. I want you to get better. I want you to be able to smile again and I want you to live your life because this heart inside of here deserves it and I want this heart to make a sound because it wants to make it."

Brooke sobbed while Lucas said all those words to her. "Don't think of me Brooke. All you have to do now is to think of you. I know this is hard because usually you only think of other people but now it's time to take care of yourself and letting others help you is the first step and I want to help you but…but if you push me away, then I don't know what to do and I want to help you but…but if it helps you that I'm gone then…then…it's okay. I know you spent a lot of time with Alex and Julian and I admit that this makes me a little jealous but…but if they can help you then I am happy that you found them.", Brooke could tell that Lucas was not lying.

"I…I…need you.", Brooke whispered. Those words meant the world to Lucas and he lay down besides her and let her cry in his arms while he cried with her. Even after two hours he was awake and watched his broken pretty girl sleeping. It was not a peaceful sleep but at least she did not wake up screaming. Victoria Davis came into the room and took a blanket and threw it over the two of them.

"Thank you Mrs. Davis.", Lucas said and Victoria just nodded and smiled.

"Call me Victoria.", she whispered and touched her daughter's cheek. "I love you my daughter.", she kissed her nose and then went outside.

Lucas watched Brooke for hours. Sometimes life could change so fast and sometimes you just wish that you could be prepared for those changes. But that's what life is about. You never know what is going to happen until it happens.

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One year later:

"Sometimes I wonder how much a person can change. On the outside I did not really change that much but inside I am not the same Brooke Davis any more. Therapy helps me a lot but there are still moments when I just want to lay down in my bed and forget everything and wake up in a different world where nobody knows me and where my past is not there any more. My therapist told me that I should not only focus on the bad things in my life but on the good as well. That's easy to say but really hard to do. But I try my best.

Well, mom is pretty amazing. She helped me with designing clothes and I got my first fashion line called Clothes over Bros. P. Sawyer helped me with that name and I hope that I'll be able to sell some of them one day. Who knows? I still have my nightmares and eating disorder but I think I'll get better. There are times that I think I am just too weak but I can always count on all of my friends, although I don't want to do it at times. My therapist tries to show me that counting on friends and accepting their help is not weak but sometimes I just want to do it all on my own.

It's different with mom. Maybe because she's my mom. It's weird that I've never laid in her arms when I was younger and now I do it almost every night. So many things changed.

I miss Alex and Julian. They are on vacation at the moment but they send me a letter each day. Julian wants to go into the movie business. I think he's talented enough. He should use Broody's book as movie material. Definitely. I feel so connected to Julian. He became my best friend pretty fast.

I can't believe that Haley and Nathan are getting a child and I'll be the godmother. That is such an honor. I bet Jake and Peyton will be parents soon too but she slapped me playfully when I told them that. I worry a little about Rachel. She changes her "boyfriends" way too fast. Last week she got that bartender called Owen and now she can only talk about Cooper. I on the other hand think that I still need some time for myself until I can have a boyfriend again. I still love my Broody and he loves me but it feels right at the moment that we broke up. I don't know it it's really a break-up because we spend almost every day together but it's like getting to know each other again. Step by step.

I am glad I did not take those pills. It's hard writing that and feeling it every day but I got this list with all those people that make me try my best and I really can't wait to see the Naley cutie soon. I am forced to write this diary but sometimes I have no clue what to write down. It's like talking to myself anyways. I am going to the mall with Broody now. I convinced him to go shopping with me. Yeah! I saw those amazing shoes. I definitely need them. I hope I'll never have to go back to the psychiatry. I hated it there although it helped me (a bit).

Sometimes I live in my own bubble. Julian made me laugh so much when he said that he missed the "Brooke-bubble." when he was gone for the weekend. I don't really like my own bubble but I am happy that other people do. Oh, it's time to go shopping. Bye diary."

The End

Sequel one day? Yes or no?

xoxoxox

Your CaseyJr.