Revised version of chapter 3. I do not own Gakuen Alice and it's characters, they are the property of the great Tachibana Higuchi.

When I feel I finally might be able to move on to the future the a ghost of the person I care about most appears before me. Ten years ago she pushed forward yet now she clings to fragment of the dead. Perhaps we're the same, I cling to the past, she clings to the lost. And yet she is a fragment of the person I knew and I remain myself.

Ruka couldn't help feeling bad when he looked at Sakura, sleeping a hospital bed with tube in her arm, despite her refusal to go to the hospital he had taken her. Even though it was for her own good, he felt a little bad about taking her in her sleep. It wasn't like he had a choice; she wouldn't have gone if she were conscious. At least Sakura's condition was stable now; thought Ruka couldn't say the same about her child. Hiroshi's condition could easily be called life threatening, he was so young and so frail...

Ruka touched Sakura's cheek, "what will you do if you lose your child too, Sakura?" he asked her silently, "is it even possible to be less alive than you already are without dying?" He found himself running his hand along Sakura's face, finally reaching her lips. How many times had those lips kissed Natsume? When was the last time those lips had held a smile? Before he knew it, Ruka found himself planting a kiss on her unconscious lips. He drew back immediately, ashamed of himself; how could he do such a thing to someone as helpless a Sakura was now? Ruka found himself wondering, if Natsume was in his place now, what would he have done? I'm pathetic, he chastised himself, I'm jealous of a dead man! What an idiot I am...

His eyes fell on her child, Hiroshi, though Sakura's condition had stabilized, her child still lingered near the edge. Ruka couldn't remember the child ever opening his eyes, let alone crying or making any type of sound. He wondered how long it had been since that child had eaten, awakened, cried, or shown any other sign of life.

Ruka barely noticed the doctor entering the room to check on Sakura and Hiroshi, he probably wouldn't have noticed the doctor if the doctor hadn't froze at the sight of Sakura and Ruka. Ruka looked up at him, he was tall and wore glasses, and his black hair was neat, even though a few strands fell over one of his eyes. Ruka glanced at his name tag and practically jump out of his seat. It read:

Subaru Imai, Head Doctor

Subaru Imai. Hotaru's older brother. Ruka just sat there, stunned, unable to speak, hopelessly trying to think of something to say, but unable to form any words in his head. But lucky for him, Imai spoke first.

"Looks like I'm too late for this one."

~Mikan's POV

My Reasons for living are slipping away... Don't worry; I'll join you soon, Natsume.

Mikan's eye's fluttered open, too late for whom? That voice sounded familiar, but she couldn't quite place where she had heard it before. She recognized Subaru Imai immediately, but at the moment the place he was standing was far more important to her. He was standing right over Hiroshi's crib, frantically, she sat up. Ruka-pyon and Imai both turned their heads her way, Imai closed his eyes and began to speak, but what was the use of saying anything more after what he had just said?

"That's your child, isn't it? I'm so terribly sorry."

Sorry? Did he honestly think that was enough? Maybe if he was a normal doctor, but he had a healing alice for heaven's sake! He'd taken away all she had left of Natsume! Her only son! She rose out of her bed, her head spinning with fever and fury, her hand out stretched, prepared to use her alice on him. Imai stepped aside, he obviously anticipated that she would attack him. But her alice had still been used, a stone lay in her hand and it wasn't the stone of Subaru Imai's alice. This alice stone had belonged to Hiroshi.

She stared at the stone, she recognized the color, she'd seen this kind of stone before, but where had she seen it? The stone was an ominous black, She was sure she must have come across a stone such as this before. "What alice did my child have?" Mikan thought hard and stared intently at the stone, trying to jog her memory to figure out when she had seen such a stone, and of course what alice had it contained? The stone didn't feel right, just holding it caused a dull pain in her hand, like it contained a truly terrible alice. Part of her didn't want to know what it was, she was so sure it was a dangerous alice, but as a mother she needed to know exactly what her child had been.

She remembered, the stone looked just like that person's stone, even though she had only seen it but once. This explained its ominous appearance and feel, it did contain the mark of death alice after all, if someone were to put it into their body it was likely they would die. This was the tool Mikan needed to join Natsume and Hiroshi.

Wow. this needed revision badly.