Here it is: the final chapter. I've spent one yea, six months, and eighteen days on this fanfiction and now it's finally finished. I really hope you're satisfied with the ending. I don't own Gakuen Alice.

I think maybe this was what living felt like.

Mikan was lying in bed, gazing up at the ceiling, searching her mind for that blankness that passes into the state of sleep. It was falling asleep that was, out of all of the old habits she was trying to resume, the hardest to do. During the day she could talk to Tsubasa or Misaki, find a book to read, or find anything else to occupy herself. It was only in the hours she lay awake in her bed that things she had pushed out of her head would resurface. The odd thing was, what troubled her the most wasn't the thought of Natsume or her dead son. It was Ruka.

Over the past week with Tsubasa Mikan had almost accepted that they were gone and it wasn't right for her to follow just yet. Yes, Natsume was the love of her life, yes Hiroshi had gone before his time, but this didn't mean Mikan wasn't allowed to live. When she and Natsume, the two people closest to Ruka had disappeared he had learned to live, and now so was Mikan. In a way she envied Ruka, even though he had thought his love (Mikan felt embarrassed referring to herself as such, even just in thought) had left him for what must have seemed like forever he got another chance. Natsume, on the other hand, was dead. There was nothing Mikan could do to change this.

For a couple days after this realization, Mikan had thought she had everything figured out. Then she had had the pleasure of a chat over the phone with Hotaru (Ruka had gotten her number from Subaru and sent it to Tsubasa.) Although Hotaru had, unlike Ruka, moved on from romantically loving Mikan, she had still brought up a troubling point. Mikan had to figure out how she felt about Ruka. She couldn't leave him hanging forever.

Hotaru was now working in Europe inventing the newest highly advanced technology. From what Mikan had heard she was happy there. She even had a girlfriend. Mikan had, of course, grilled her for details about her new lover. But Hotaru had never been a person of many words, in the end she had just promised to send Mikan a picture or possible pay a visit to Japan in the future.

Once upon a time Mikan had had a special someone too. It was strange how hard it was to remember a happy memory of Natsume. They had always been on the run, and it was always a struggled to find food and shelter, a fair amount of the time they had been cold and hungry on the streets. Mikan's happiest memories were from all those years ago at the academy.

It took hours of careful thought to realize that the more she thought about it, the more her mind went in circles. She couldn't decide what needed to be done simply through cautious consideration. A long time ago, Mikan had taken risks. And now it now it was high time she tried again. She would call in the morning. Thinking determined thoughts, Mikan drifted into the realm of sleep.

The next morning Mikan awoke early. A glance at the clock told her it was only half passed seven. Normally Mikan preferred to sleep in until as late as ten o'clock but today anticipation had caused her to wake up earlier. She didn't know whether Ruka would be awake at this hour; so Mikan contented herself with a shower. As the hot water poured over her skin, Mikan felt some stir in her heart. It was a feeling she hadn't felt since the day she had left the academy. For a few moments she let it coarse through her, without bothering to identify it. As she dried herself off the identity of that emotion occurred to her. It was hope.

Ruka's POV

I know this may be unreasonable, but… For my own sake I need to try; you'll forgive me… right?

The last week hadn't been easy on Ruka. He'd lost a customer after the owner of the rabbit discovered that he'd let its paw become infected. This left Ruka with little to no work to keep his mind off what he called 'the Mikan dilemma'. Tsubasa had called a couple times to give him updates on how Mikan was coping, but this still left him with hours to contemplate how his actions may have affected her.

Ruka knew how terribly selfish and inconsiderate he had been. In a way it was as though he had betrayed not just Mikan, but Natsume. Hadn't they been friends? But to Ruka that world seemed like ancient history. Natsume had become a tragic hero in some ancient legend, or at least he had thought of his old friend that way until Mikan reappeared. But in the end hadn't Natsume betrayed him as well? He had left Ruka alone at the academy, and without Natsume and Mikan Ruka had realized just how lonely it was in that place.

That was what had kept Ruka lying awake the previous night. He had been holding a trial in his head, to see if it was him or Natsume that was the guilty one. It had gone on and on until he realized that that was how it was bound to go. Because neither he nor Natsume was either guilty or innocent. They were human.

The ringing of his cell phone awakened Ruka the next morning. A restless night combined with his Mikan dilemma and the fact that he was wasn't a morning person to begin with made Ruka immediately irritated with this caller. Although if he had spared the time to look at the clock beside his bed he would have seen that it wasn't actually quite as early as it seemed. Grudgingly, Ruka stepped out of bed and glanced about for his cell. He soon spotted it lying on the table, playing its peppy little ringtone. Ruka didn't even bother to check who was calling; he just grabbed it and pressed it against his ear.

"Hello?" he muttered groggily and grumpily into the phone.

"Ruka-pyon..?" Ruka heard a very familiar voice from the other end. A slightly shaky voice that broke any hold drowsiness held over him. It couldn't be…

"Is that you, Mikan?" It took a fair amount of effort to keep his voice steady. Why had she called him? Was she ready to see him again… Or was she going the tell him to disappear from her life?

"Yes, it's me." Ruka took a deep breath in, mentally preparing himself for what might follow. There was an awkward pause. "Over the last week I've been thinking…"

"About what?"

"About, well- I just thought I should at least try…" Ruka didn't know what to think, Mikan wasn't making sense. It was obvious she had decided to tell him something important, but was having problem phrasing it. He sensed Mikan collect herself as she paused again.

"If… If it's alright by you, I thought I might try being your girlfriend."

The End

It's really here, believe it or not. I thought about writing another chapter but it would have been too forced. The natural flow of the story ends here. It forks in two different directions, you can choose which way it goes from here. I'm kind of tempted to do an epilogue anyway though, but it might not be for awhile. You may have noticed that I said that Hotaru had a girlfriend, if you don't think of her as a lesbian that's fine, but that's just how she is in my mind. I'd like to thank all of you for taking the time to read this, it means a lot to me. Please review, I'd love to hear your thoughts on the end.