I don't own Twilight.
Edward rushed up the stairs towards his apartment, taking them two at a time. He was running late- stupid Friday afternoon Seattle traffic - and he could barely wait for tonight. One of Bella's favorite artists was in town doing a one-night-only benefit at a club downtown. The tickets were ridiculously expensive and hard to get, but Edward had managed to acquire a pair from one of the other musicians he worked with on occasion. Bella didn't know where they were going, he had just told her to be ready to go at 7:00. He had been bursting with the secret all week.
It had been four weeks since the blackout, and three since they had decided to be an "official" couple, but Bella had spent most of the last few weeks working on a paper – 10,000 words on Representations of Elizabethan Era Misogyny in Shakespeare. Just the title made Edward's head hurt . So this was their first real date. The closest they had come were the nights Edward had dragged her away from her laptop to take a break to eat, and even those times had been sporadic. Bella had worked herself to exhaustion, and he was determined to make this night perfect.
Edward looked at his watch. 7:15. Damn. I hope she isn't too mad at me.
He unlocked the front door and walked into the living room to find Bella on the couch. She was dressed casually in dark jeans and a blue sweater he had never seen her wear before, her hair cascading in soft curls around her face. She was incredibly beautiful - and fast asleep. Edward took a moment to drink in the sight of her, her face relaxed and her long dark lashes resting on her deliciously pink cheeks.
Is her face always that pink?
Edward sat down next to her, speaking her name softly to wake her up. She stirred slightly but did not awake. He said her name again, louder this time, and reached up to run his fingers down her cheek.
Her face is awfully warm.
At his touch, Bella's lids flickered opened, and she looked at him, eyes shining. Shining a little too much, actually. They were oddly unfocused.
"Edward?" Her voice was rough. "Did I fall asleep?" She coughed a few times, then took in a deep breath and coughed again. She blinked and shook her head, as if she was unsure where she was.
"Mmm-hmm. Did you get tired of waiting for me?"
Bella looked at him oddly. "Waiting for you? Oh, um, I guess..." She coughed again. "Wait, what?" She blinked heavily. "I sat down, and I was so tired..." she trailed off.
Edward was concerned. Bella was acting very oddly, and she looked...off. Her cheeks were too flushed, and her eyes were too bright. Plus, there was that cough. "Baby, are you ok?"
*Cough* "I'm fine," she replied, with another cough. "Are you ready to go?" She stood, and suddenly swayed on her feet, her eyes opening wide. Edward caught her as she quickly sat back down, helping her land on the sofa.
"You aren't fine." Edward laid his hand gently on her forehead. "You're burning up. How long have you been coughing like that?"
The question seemed to require a lot of thought. She closed her eyes for a moment before answering. "Since this morning...I think..." She trailed off as she was taken by fit of coughing.
"Ok sweetheart. Time for bed for you, I think."
"But, you made plans, you were so excited," Bella protested weakly, between coughs. "I got Alice to help me pick out something new to wear..." Bella's eyes filled with tears.
Edward pulled her close to him in a gentle hug. He stroked her hair, attempting to soothe her. "You look beautiful baby. I love the new clothes. But you're sick. We'll go out next weekend, and you can wear your new outfit, and I will show off my gorgeous girl."
"Ok." Bella nodded in agreement against his chest.
"Can you walk? Do you want me to carry you?"
"I think I can walk. Just don't let go, ok?"
"Never." Edward gently helped her to her feet, and together they made their way to her room. Edward eased her down onto the bed and opened her dresser, locating a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt. He chuckled when he realized it was one of his that she had appropriated. He handed her the clothes.
"Can you change on your own?"
Bella blushed. "I think so. Um, can you get me a sports bra? They are in the top drawer." She blushed darker.
Edward complied, taking a deep breath before he opened the drawer. He wasn't sure if this was the drawer where she kept all her underwear, and he didn't know if he hoped it was, or if he hoped it wasn't. He released the breath he had been holding when he saw a small pile of neatly folded sports bras next to piles of tank tops and shorts. He grabbed the top one and handed it to her without a word.
"I'll just...I'll be right outside, ok?"
Edward stepped into the hallway and leaned against the wall, taking deep breaths and attempting to distract himself from thoughts of his beautiful Bella changing on the other side of the door. He heard coughing from her room, but beyond that there were no sounds.
It seemed hours later when she called out for him to come in again. Her new clothes were in the chair in the corner, and she seemed somehow tiny and frail in the baggy pants and his t-shirt.
"Do you need anything else?" Are you warm enough?"
"I think I am ok."
"Alright. Get some sleep, you will feel better in the morning." I hope. "Call me if you need anything, ok?" Bella nodded drowsily.
Bella lay down and Edward bent to help pull her blankets up to her chin. He bent and pressed his lips softly against her warm forehead. "Sweet dreams, baby."
Edward left her room, being sure to leave the door open a bit so he could hear her if she called out for him. As soon as he reached the living room he pulled out his cell phone and called Jasper.
"Hey man, you know that Ben Folds show tonight? You and Alice want to go?"
****r~d****
Why am I in bed? What time is it?
Bella was very confused. What day is it? She concentrated, trying to remember.She and Alice had gone shopping on Wednesday after she submitted her paper, then on Thursday she had taught the literary analysis class for which she was a TA, and on Friday...what had she done on Friday? Had Friday happened yet?
I need to grade those essays on Friday, and then Edward has big plans...I hope he likes my new clothes...
Bella shook her head to try to clear away the buzzing that filled her ears and kept her from thinking clearly. But...did I already wear that sweater? I think I did...but I just bought it and I was saving it for Edward...
She sat up and looked around the room, and despite the way her vision spun, she saw the sweater in question, tossed across the back of her desk chair.
Why is that there? Did I try it on and leave it out? Whoa...
Bella lay back down as her head began to spin again.
Once her head cleared a little, she looked over at the clock glowing on her nightstand.
8:37
8:37? It's too dark to be morning...and yesterday was Thursday, so it must be...Oh no! Edward said to be ready at 7! He's going to be so upset!
Bella sat up again, but before she could stand up, she began to cough. The coughing, and the accompanying pain in her lungs, drove everything else from her mind. She desperately tried to breathe, but every breath brought on a new bout of racking coughs. She was bent double over the bed, gasping for air, when her door flew open.
****r~d****
After Jasper came by to pick up the tickets, Edward settled on the couch to watch TV, keeping the volume low so he would be sure to hear Bella if she called him. He definitely didn't like the sound of that cough. After flipping channels for a while, he settled on a rerun of Bones and tried to let himself be absorbed by the story. It didn't work. Just as he flipped off the TV and decided to try to get some work done for the next week, he heard Bella start to cough.
He was on his feet in a moment, but he hesitated. He didn't want to disturb her if she could go back to sleep. But the coughing continued, sounding loud in the otherwise silent apartment. He bolted for her room.
He pushed the door open to find her sitting on the bed, leaned over, coughing and gasping desperately. Despite his rush to get to her, he was completely at a loss as to what to do to help. Finally he sat down next to her and began to rub her back as she coughed.
"Breathe, baby, just breathe."
She continued to cough, and Edward cursed his own impotence. Am I just supposed to sit here and watch her suffer?
Finally, after what felt to him like a small eternity in hell, Bella's coughs subsided and she was able to breathe more normally. Tears were streaming down her face, and when she spoke, her voice sounded as if her larynx had been through a meat grinder.
"Edward?"
"Yes?"
"What day is it?"
Edward almost laughed at the ridiculousness of the question. Bella just spent the last 10 minutes coughing her lungs out, and she wanted to know what day it was?
"It's Friday, love," he replied gently.
"Oh no! Your plans! I am so sor..." her apology was overtaken by another fit of coughing.
Edward waited for the episode to pass, rubbing slow circles on her back. Once she was breathing again, he answered her.
"Sweetheart, we already talked about this. It's ok. Don't you remember?"
Bella drew her eyebrows together, concentrating. Edward wanted to kiss the little V it made on her forehead, but he thought this probably wasn't the time.
"Kind of...wait...did I fall asleep on the couch?"
Edward nodded.
Bella sighed, and it brought on another series of coughs. Once they passed, she leaned heavily against Edward's side. He wrapped his arm around her and gave in to the temptation to kiss her forehead. He let his lips linger for a moment, judging her temperature. Definitely too warm.
"Do you want anything? You didn't eat dinner."
"No, I'm not *cough* hungry. *cough* Some water, maybe?"
"Sure, baby. I'll be right back."
He left the room, and as soon as he cleared the door he pulled out his phone and dialed his father. He desperately hoped he was available.
Thankfully, Carlisle answered on the first ring.
"Dad? You have to help me!"
"Edward? Son? What's wrong?"
"It's Bella. She's sick. She's coughing and coughing, she can't stop. Her voice is raw and she's got a fever, and dad, she's all foggy, like, she doesn't know what day it is and she can't remember stuff, and I don't know what to do..."
"Alright Edward, calm down. Tell me her symptoms again."
Edward reviewed with his father all he had observed in Bella over the past few hours, and Carlisle listened patiently, occasionally asking for clarification or more details. When Edward finished his recitation, Carlisle was silent for a long moment.
"Dad? Are you still there?"
"Yes, son, I am just thinking. It's hard to do a diagnosis over the phone, and I am not Bella's doctor, but from what you have described it sounds like she has a nice case of the flu."
"So what do I do?"
"Have you had a flu shot?"
"Yes."
"Good. Has she?"
"No, she can't, she reacts to something in them. And she hates doctors, plus, she doesn't have health insurance right now."
"Alright, here's what you can do..."
They spent several minutes discussing ways to handle various symptoms, and Edward made a detailed list of every medication Carlisle mentioned. He suggested propping her up so she could breathe more easily, and making sure she drank enough water and ate regularly, even if it was just a little bit.
"And son..."
"Yes?"
"She's not going to like this, but if she is coughing as badly as you say...if she gets any worse, you may need to take her to the ER. Stay with her, at any rate. If you do have to take her in, tell her not to worry about the money, if she can't pay for it then we will."
"Dad, you don't have to do that."
"Of course we do. She's like a daughter to us."
"Thanks dad." Edward was nearly limp with relief and finally having some idea of how he could take care of his Bella.
"It's been a while since we've seen you two. Maybe your mother and I can come up in a couple of weeks?"
"That would be great. I'm sure she would love to see you. But...you should probably know something first."
"What's that?"
"Bella and I...we're..." Edward was suddenly at a loss. How did he explain this to his father? "We're, um, together."
"I see." Edward could hear the smile in his father's voice.
"It's...well, it kind of just happened, and we haven't told many people..."
"Son, it's not exactly a surprise."
"It's not?" It surprised me.
"No, son, it's not. Your mother and I had a bet about it actually. I just won."
"What? You and mom bet about us?" Edward sputtered.
Carlisle laughed. "Yes, we did."
"Fine. Laugh it up." His tone was petulant, but Edward couldn't manage to stay mad at his father for long, and soon they had tentatively chosen a weekend for Carlisle and Esme to visit. Edward ended the conversation, feeling he had left Bella alone long enough.
He went into the kitchen for the promised water, and returned to Bella's room to find her curled in a ball on the bed, asleep again.
****r~d****
As the door swung partially closed behind Edward's retreating back, Bella gave in to the demands of her spinning head and lay down again.
Mmmm, sweet Edward. Everyone should have an Edward.
She suppressed a giggle at the image that came to mind of an ad campaign for a line of Edward dolls, with that tagline - "Everyone should have an Edward!" She had finally stopped coughing, and she was afraid laughing would make it start again. She lay there and concentrated on inhaling and exhaling, avoiding breathing too deeply. She heard Edward's voice in the hallway, but the buzzing in her head was back, and it made it very hard to understand anything. It took too much energy to try, so she relaxed and just listened to the velvety sound of his voice.
Her eyelids began to droop, and her whole body was suddenly too heavy for words. She knew Edward was somewhere, and she vaguely thought he might be coming back, and there was a reason she should stay awake, but it didn't seem that important. She drifted off, lulled by the cadence of his voice outside her door.
The next thing she was aware of was Edward's arms lifting her gently from her bed. She buried her face against his warm shoulder.
"Wahh gohh?" She mumbled sleepily against him.
"What was that love?"
She lifted her head a bit. "Where're we going?"
"My room"
"Why?" Bella was confused again.
Edward chuckled as he carried her down the hall. "Because, sweet girl, my bed is more comfortable than yours. Plus, I have a futon in my room, and I don't fancy sleeping in your desk chair."
Although this made no sense at all to Bella's befuddled brain, she didn't have the energy to pursue it. "Kay." She allowed her head to fall against his shoulder again.
****r~d****
Edward lowered her onto his bed and was reminded of the last time she had slept there. That night, after their fight, when she had come to him and curled up in his arms, seeking comfort with him even before everything had been resolved between them. He had been astounded by the amount of courage it must have taken her to approach him after he had been so cruel, and after she had fallen asleep against his chest he had watched her in the dark, struck by how unbelievably lucky he was to have her in his life.
He looked down at her now, her cheeks flushed with fever, and resolved again to take care of her for as long as she would let him. Unfortunately, this time taking care of her would involve leaving her, if just for a little while. He wrote a note and left it on the pillow next to her, explaining that he had gone to get medicine and would be back as fast as he could. He located her phone and put it with the note so she could call him if she needed him, and took one last look at her before he left. She was sleeping peacefully - hopefully she would continue to do so, and she would never know he left.
He quickly jogged the few blocks to the closest grocery store, and hurried through it, carefully consulting Carlisle's list. The pharmacy section was small, but well stocked, and within a few minutes he had everything he needed. As he approached the checkout, he heard the beginning notes of Liszt's Un Sospiro - Bella's ringtone.
Oh, no. I hope she's ok.
"Bella? Are you alright?"
"Edward?" Her voice was barely audible.
"Yes, love. Are you ok? I'm so sorry I had to leave, I should be back in a few minutes though."
"Can you bring me some grapefruit juice? I really want grapefruit juice."
"Of course. Do you need anything else?"
"Fried chicken? And ice cream?"
Edward couldn't help but laugh. "What kind of ice cream, sweetheart?"
"Ummm...Banana? Do they make banana ice cream?"
"I'll look. I'm sure I can find something. Anything else?"
"Can you hurry? I miss you."
Edward's heart melted at those words, spoken in her tiny, raspy voice. "Yes, I will. Close your eyes and go back to sleep baby, I will be there before you know it."
"Kay"
"I love you."
Edward hit end, then went as quickly as he could to gather the items Bella had requested. As soon as he had paid for them and got to the sidewalk outside the store, he started for home at a jog. Within minutes, the jog had turned into a run, and then into a sprint.
****r~d****
Bella awoke slowly. She took in her surroundings and realized she was in Edward's bed rather than her own, and she vaguely remembered being carried into his room. She rolled over, and saw a piece of paper on the pillow next to her, along with her phone. She reached for the paper, and saw Edward's always-perfect script.
Bella,
I went to get you some medicine that Carlisle recommended. I'll be back as quickly as I can. Please call if you need anything.
- E
Bella smiled and stretched. She breathed experimentally, hoping desperately she would not start coughing again. Fortunately, the cough seemed to have calmed itself, for the moment at least. Then she swallowed.
Wow, my throat really hurts. I want some grapefruit juice. And I think I'm hungry. Mmmm, fried chicken. I want fried chicken. I should call and ask Edward to bring me some.
Before she could talk herself out of it, she had picked up the phone. It hurt to talk, but she persevered. She found herself asking for banana ice cream in addition to the grapefruit and fried chicken.
That has got to be the weirdest combination ever. He must think I am insane.
Somehow, she didn't seem to care too much.
He told her to go back to sleep, which struck her as a lovely suggestion, and then he said it.
"I love you."
Bella's breath caught, and it had nothing to do with the flu. He hadn't said those words since the day after the blackout.
She had hoped to take Edward's suggestion and go back to sleep, but sleep was now an impossibility. He head whirled with the implications of Edward's statement, and her own feelings.
When he had said it after the blackout, she had attributed it to the emotion of the day and hadn't taken it very seriously. They were best friends, after all, and had been for most of their lives. They loved each other. It wasn't the first time she had heard those words from him, although it was first time she had heard them while she was snuggled in his arms, and the first time they had been prefaced by an earth-shaking, breath-taking kiss.
Does he really love me? I can't imagine why he would. Do I love him? I mean, I love him, but do I LOVE him love him? What does that even mean?
Bella's experience with love - real, enduring love, was practically nonexistent. Her parents hadn't divorced until she and Jasper were in college, but they should have. They had been little more than roommates for her entire life. They rarely fought; fighting would have required them to notice one another. Instead, her father spent every evening in front of the television, beer (after beer after beer) in hand, and her mother had stayed very, very busy. Yoga, painting classes, modern dance, Spanish courses; Renee had done it all, all the time keeping a perfectly immaculate house and being a very visible "perfect" mom, present at every school event and PTA meeting, and utterly out of touch with her children. The undercurrent of tension and animosity had been so powerful in her house that Bella had escaped to the Cullens' house, three houses down the street, as often as she could ever since she was a child, and Jasper often joined her there. They had spent so much time there as teenagers that Esme and Carlisle had made one of the bedrooms "Bella's room" so she could have a place to get away from the boys when she wanted to. It had been Esme who had bought Bella her first tampons and Carlisle had taught Jasper how to hit a baseball and to open doors for girls.
She could say the words "I love you", and had said them - granted, it was only a few times, to only a few people. But that didn't mean she knew how to actually do it, and this love that Edward spoke of - the love he seemed to offer so freely - Bella didn't know how that worked. And she was suddenly terrified.
She was shaken out of her thoughts by the sound of the front door opening. She quickly composed herself, hoping Edward would blame any odd behavior on her illness.
I've gotta figure this out. I can't have the flu forever.
****r~d*****
Bella was strangely subdued when he returned home, but Edward attributed that to the flu. They shared a little fried-chicken-and-grapefruit-juice picnic on his bed, after Bella had taken Carlisle's suggested flu cocktail. She soon grew sleepy again, and Edward retrieved every pillow in the apartment to help prop her up to sleep. After making sure for the 37th time that she was warm enough, he grabbed the pillow Bella had insisted he use himself, and a couple of blankets, and lay down on the futon. They lay in silence in for a few minutes, the room gently illuminated with the glow of streetlamps and neon outside the window, Bella's eyelids drooping. Just when Edward thought she had drifted off, she spoke quietly into the darkness.
"Edward?"
"Yes?"
"Will you tell me a story?"
He hadn't heard those words from her in ages. As a child, stories had been her refuge, and any time she was tired or scared, or things at home got to be too much, she would ask him for one. As a teenager she had discovered literature, and his stories had fallen aside in favor of Jane Austin and the Bronte sisters and Shakespeare.
Edward smiled to himself in the darkness. I've missed that.
"Once upon a time, there was a princess who was locked in a tower..."
Just as the prince broke the last enchantment to rescue the princess from her imprisonment, Bella fell asleep.
Despite the cough medicine Carlisle had recommended, Bella had several coughing fits throughout the night. As long as Bella was partially upright she could breathe normally, but as soon as she became horizontal, the coughing would start up again, and it was nearly impossible to stop. Each time, after the coughing had subsided, she would situate herself upright, then shortly after falling back asleep she would roll off the pillows that held her up. She then would wake herself up coughing, and the cycle would start over again. When she woke up, Edward woke as well. By 2 am, Bella was crying in frustration, and Edward had abandoned the futon and moved to the bed. He went to get her another dose of cough syrup, then they sat on the edge of the bed as he stroked her back, whispering gently in an attempt to calm her. Eventually her tears subsided and she began to breathe more easily.
"I have an idea."
Bella did not respond, she just leaned against his side in exhaustion. He took that as consent to try his idea. Edward leaned pillows against the headboard and then situated himself against the pillows. He brought her to him, so that she was leaned back against him with her back resting on his chest and her head on his shoulder. He pulled the blankets up over both of them, wrapped his arms securely around her waist, and whispered in her ear.
"Comfortable?" He felt her nod drowsily.
"Warm enough?"
Another nod.
"Go to sleep, baby."
"But you won't be able to sleep like that," Bella protested feebly, her voice nearly gone.
"Shhh, don't worry about me, you need to sleep to get well." He gently stroked his fingers up and down the inside of her forearm, a foolproof way to help her relax.
Sure enough, within a few minutes, her body became heavy with sleep against his.
Maybe this flu thing isn't all bad, Edward thought, as he closed his eyes and dozed as well.
****r~d****
Just as the room began to fill with early morning sunlight, Bella woke feeling considerably more human, and experiencing a very urgent human need. She cautiously extricated herself from Edward's embrace and went to answer her bladder's demands and take some more cough medicine. When she returned, she sat down on the futon and considered the man leaned against the headboard, still unconscious.
He's so beautiful when he's asleep. Heck, he's beautiful all the time.
She studied his features - his strong jaw, his perfect lips, his crazy hair. In sleep, he almost looked like the boy in her memories.
"Bella? What are you doing up here?"
Bella looked up in surprise, hastily wiping her face. Edward's head had appeared in the trapdoor to his treehouse, his 12 year old face twisted in concern. "Me and Jas have been looking all over for you. Your mom called, she said you have to go home."
Bella sighed. "I thought she would. She's mad."
"Why? What happened?" Edward settled himself next to her, leaning against the wall.
"We got in a fight. I told her I didn't want to do ballet anymore. I suck at it."
Edward laughed and nodded. "No offense Bells, but you really do."
"I know! Everybody knows! My teacher hates me, I make the whole class look bad. I can barely do a plie without falling over. But mom says it will make more graceful." Bella rolled her eyes.
"You guys fight all the time. What's the big deal this time?"
Bella bit her lip, and twisted her fingers in her lap. "Charlie." The word was barely a whisper.
"Oh." He sat in silence.
Even at twelve, Bella appreciated that Edward didn't push. He knew how to wait and let her talk if she wanted to.
They sat together for a long time, the only sounds in the wooden structure the songs of birds in the trees outside.
"He said I was being disrespectful. That I shouldn't talk to my mother like that. Then..." Bella trailed off. Edward focused very hard on something outside the window and pretended he couldn't her the sniffles. "Don't say anything to Jasper, ok? I don't want him to get in more trouble." Fourteen year old Jasper had quite a volatile temper, and he was protective of his baby sister.
Edward didn't speak, he just put his arm around her, a little awkwardly. Bella leaned her head on his thin shoulder.
Bella shook off her reverie, swiping at the tears that suddenly threatened to spill down her face. Even at twelve, Edward had been beautiful, and sweet, and thoughtful. Bella could barely stand to look at pictures of herself at that age, but Edward's adolescent awkward phase had been practically nonexistent. Their lives had been so entertwined for so long that nearly all her memories involved him in some way. The memories she didn't repress anyway; memories like that particular argument with Renee when Charlie decided to get involved. She knew Edward had suspected that there was more to the story, but she hadn't told him, and he hadn't pushed. Bella was clumsy, she was always covered in bruises. There was no way for anyone to know which ones came from her many bumps and falls and which ones...didn't.
Bella couldn't understand why he had stuck around for so long. She was average, at best, and he was amazing. She was thankful he had though, and now... now he said he loved her. His behavior said he loved her. She couldn't understand why. Bella had been taking care of herself for so long that she wasn't sure how to react when someone else wanted to do it, but she had to admit, it was nice. She desperately hoped it would last. Her heart squeezed with fear at the thought that it wouldn't.
His eyes fluttered open, as if he could feel her gaze. Her breath caught in her chest, and it had nothing to do with the flu and everything to do with the sleepy, scruffy smile he sent her way.
"Hey, what are you doing all the way over there?"
She didn't answer; she just crawled onto the bed and back into his arms. She closed her eyes as he tightened his hold around her and nuzzled her ear.
Guess I should enjoy it while it lasts.
Thanks for reading!