A/N: I do not own Twilight.

Thank you to my pre-reader jppc, and my beta Robobat. I learn something new every chapter. ;D

To all of you reading this, thank you.

Chapter 3 – Mirror, mirror

Bella

Brown eyes staring intently at the face in the mirror, trying to check the non-existent scars I imagined were all over my face. Only a very small tinge of yellow bruising was patched on my skin, which was only now visible when you concentrated on that particular area of my face.

The only thing that served as evidence of my car accident was the memory loss. Nobody would know about that loss, not by looking at me. I was staring at myself in the bathroom mirror, but even I couldn't see the significance of what was not there anymore. The same smile, the same pout, even the frown was one I was particularly familiar with. It was the same face I had known for over twenty-one years now. It shouldn't feel different, but it did.

A big chunk of my past might have been yanked out of me by the accident, and I could attribute this weird feeling to that. I could be angry about what had happened, but it wouldn't do me any good. The fact that I was still alive made me more grateful than anything. As much as I didn't want to dwell on the trauma of the accident, I could never shake the feeling in my gut that I needed all of the pieces of me back to fully recover.

The accident was something like a dream. I had bits and pieces of information, but nothing concrete. Details remained distant and unclear. I could hardly remember anything except when I woke up confused in the hospital. The bruises and cuts were physical evidence of what had been a horrible accident, but they too were slowly fading. I was scared some of the memories that were retained in my brain would fade away as well. They were all I had left of my previous life.

I remembered my parents' death. I remembered everything about them…their laughter, their faces, their penchant for overprotectiveness. I remembered how it felt to lose them and suddenly be alone. Somehow, knowing that even though this pain was still new, I had some semblance of control.

If someone asked me what it felt like to have amnesia, I would say it felt the same. How could I feel differently when I couldn't remember certain things? I knew some important details of my past, and somehow I was grateful I still had those, and it was enough for me to feel as if I was still the same person as before all this. I knew I would need to find those memories one day, but what I did remember would have to be enough for now.

Some days felt like I was on the verge of remembering, especially when a feeling or a smell would trigger something in me like I had already experienced it before. The doctors said something like that would happen, and I should be ready to just feel all of it.

I was. I was welcoming it all, open to anything that would help me regain all of what I had lost in my brain.

Until then, I would have to rely on those close to me to tell me about things I couldn't remember…like Edward.

I groaned, remembering what happened yesterday.

I threw myself at Edward and tried to seduce him after Alice and Jasper left for the Kings of Leon concert. My attempt clearly failed because he stopped me from giving him a hand job. He stopped me, and I was mortified. He insisted I wasn't ready for anything beyond kissing. My embarrassment eased upon his explanation, making me realize he was right. I couldn't remember anything of our sexual history, making me both excited and scared at the same time of the prospect of getting intimate with him. He said we should wait until I was ready, and I agreed.

Holy shit! I was blushing over the thought of being naked alone with my boyfriend. I wasn't even sure if I was good in bed. I couldn't remember that particular skill or non-skill. How pathetic was I?

I heard Alice calling my name. Reluctantly, I moved away from the mirror. Already dressed half an hour ago, I was ready to go. I gathered my books and bag, and made my way out to the living room.

Alice looked excited about something, and I wondered what it would be this time. Yesterday she had dragged me to the mall after my last class. I loved shopping, but not with Alice. She had more energy than I knew what to do with when it came to these things, and even if I wanted to, I couldn't keep up.

I dropped my bag on the couch, knowing we wouldn't be leaving for campus soon.

"Damn, girl. Could you be more slow?" she said, pulling me to the kitchen. I knew from the smell of the room that she made pancakes for breakfast. I smiled at her willingness to make everything easy for me. She knew I loved pancakes, and clearly she made them specifically for me.

"Ali, you didn't have to-"

"Oh, pshh!"

"We could've gone somewhere to eat before classes." Alice hated cooking, and she didn't normally do anything in the kitchen except unwrap bags of take-out.

"Don't worry about it, Bella. Besides, I'm trying to become a better cook, since Jasper loves it when I'm in the kitchen." She attempted to make light of her efforts by using her boyfriend as an excuse. My cousin was a doll, and I loved her. If it weren't for her, I wouldn't know how to deal with everything that had happened.

"If you insist. This better not taste like rubber." My teasing received a glare from her, and I couldn't help but giggle. I sat opposite her on the table, and eagerly devoured the blueberry pancakes she made all for me. I had decided to eat it even if it would taste like shit, but it didn't. It even tasted better than I expected, if I would say so myself. Surprisingly, I remembered how bad her cooking was, and I was glad she somehow improved over the year I hadn't seen her.

"Hmmm, this tastes good, Ali. Did you buy this somewhere or was it del-""

She threw a fork at me, which I dodged easily, laughing as she stuck her tongue out to me. She was so childish.

But I missed this. I missed her.

"You shut that pie hole, dear cousin, or I'm gonna have to hurt you." Her threat was so not threatening, I just rolled my eyes at her.

"No, you won't."

"Yes, I will."

"No, you won't."

"You know I will if you continue to insult my cooking!" she insisted, her lips twitching into a smile. I was about to argue again when she interrupted. "Let's finish eating breakfast so we can go, Bella. I'm supposed to meet Jasper before my class starts."

I wasn't too hungry, but I would make sure to finish what was on my plate. It was the least I could do after she had prepared this for me.

Alice was eyeing me, as if she didn't trust my declaration that the pancakes tasted good, and had to check my expression after every bite. I took a sip of the cranberry juice she had placed in front of me. Once the sweetness and sourness of the liquid touched my tongue, something flashed through my brain. It was so fast I didn't quite grasp it. The taste of the cranberry reminded me of something, but I couldn't quite put my finger on what it was.

I shook my head, trying to make it all come back. When I opened my eyes, I could see the concern on Alice's face. She had her fork halfway to her mouth, her brows furrowed together and her mouth open. Her expression was comical, and I would've laughed at her if she wasn't so concerned about me.

It was then I remembered to ask her something.

"Ali, when did Edward and I become an item?" I had meant to ask her a couple of times, but had forgotten about it. Edward gave me a very vague answer the one time I asked him, and I didn't get the chance to ask again.

She looked startled, and I could see her almost choke on her food. She took a sip of her juice before speaking.

"Ahmm, when you arrived here for the summer. Jasper introduced you two then that was that. You've been together ever since."

I waited for her to elaborate, just staring at her, hoping she would take the hint. She didn't. Just finished her pancakes, her eyes shifting from me to her food. I was about to ask another question when she stood up so suddenly. She looked frantic, and I wondered if my question had something to do with it. But my question was a very innocent one. Maybe I was just paranoid.

"Bella, we gotta go," Alice announced.

She didn't give me the chance to ask any more questions because she pulled me roughly to the door, and insisted I hurry up so we could meet with the boys.

She was in a rush to get out of the apartment that I had to run out to catch up with her.

xxxxxxxxxx

Edward was staring at me, and I could feel my heartbeat elevate. His gaze was making me feel self-conscious, and I felt stupid. This was my boyfriend. I wasn't supposed to be shy around him any longer, not even when he was looking at me so intensely.

He was so handsome. Even though I knew he was mine, I still couldn't help wonder how it felt like the first time we met, how it was to fall in love with him. It was something I wanted to remember. I wished I would be able to do that in the future. I hoped my brain would work the same way it used to, and give me the chance to recall every little detail of that moment.

"You're staring again," I teased, giving him a smile.

He looked embarrassed and glanced away. Suddenly I felt stupid making that comment. He might be uncomfortable with my memory loss, and even though he never mentioned it, I could understand where he was coming from. Something was definitely wrong with him, but I couldn't point it out because I couldn't remember what normal was for us. I just knew he was acting strange around me.

"Edward?"

Even though I had yet to know him better myself, I didn't want him to feel I was different from the girl he had met three months ago. I wanted him to be comfortable when he was with me. I reached for his hand, the hand he had laid on top of the table, and laced my fingers with his. He turned to me, and his face was flushed. He looked so cute when he was embarrassed. Suddenly I had the urge to kiss him. Unfortunately, the table between us prevented me from doing that.

We were having our lunch in one of the small cafes near campus. We were given big discounts on our food since Emmett's uncle owned the place. Jasper and Alice had left fifteen minutes ago, and it was just the two of us. I wanted us to spend some time alone, so I could relearn things about him.

"What are you studying, Edward? I'm sorry I don't remember. I think it's one of those things I had forgotten." He looked surprised by my question.

"I'm pre-med, Bella," he answered. "I'm hoping to get into Harvard Medical School next year."

He was not only good-looking, he was smart too. I felt some surge of pride go through me knowing he had a solid plan for his future.

I squeezed his hand, and gave him a smile. "I like the idea of a smart boyfriend."

His smile widened, his cheeks dipping into cute dimples. I could feel my heart accelerate just watching him. Our eyes locked together, and I felt something changed in the atmosphere of that small restaurant. He was making me feel soft and warm and tingly inside.

I heard someone clear their throat, and the bubble Edward and I were in burst. His gaze broke away from mine, and I sighed.

I turned my head. Some girls were standing beside our table. They looked as if they wanted something, but were too chicken to say it out loud. I found it hilarious that they came all the way over here just to stand there and stare at us. Or particularly at Edward.

"Hi," I greeted. They needed to speak now, or they had to go.

"Hi," one girl said while the others greeted, "Hi, Edward."

I knew Edward was popular on this campus, but I never realized he was at the top of that list. Not until Alice explained it to me a few days ago after some girls practically threw themselves on Edward at a party I didn't attend. Some unknown feeling crept through me, as if I had felt it before. I couldn't explain it, so I just pushed the feeling away. No need to tell somebody about all these messed up feelings inside me. Maybe one day I could tell Alice. She was the only one who would understand, or would at least try. She might even know why I had these unexplained feelings toward Edward's popularity.

Looking at these girls being friendly and trying to get his attention reminded me again of who he really was. The nagging feeling was still there, but from what I learned of Edward these past three months we had been together, he was a very good and sweet boyfriend and I had nothing to worry about. There were a lot of things I didn't know about him yet, but I trusted him. All I knew of him before the accident was useless to me now. I had to get to know him again. It sucked, but if I wanted this to work, I had to.

"Hey," I heard Edward say. He was always nice, and I liked that about him.

"Is it true?" a girl with a blonde hair asked. She was looking at Edward hopefully, and I wondered if Edward didn't feel uncomfortable with all this unnecessary attention from different women.

"Is what true?"

"That she's your girlfriend."

I was still holding Edward's hand, and I could see the other girls had noticed the gesture. I felt Edward's hold tighten before I heard him say, "Of course she is."

I couldn't help the smile that escaped my lips. He sounded proud to say that. I felt the heat on my face, and I knew I was blushing.

"She's so pretty," another girl said.

"That she definitely is," Edward answered. He gave me a wink and a smile.

Oh my God! If he wasn't my boyfriend, I would have fallen for him all over again.

"You look so good together," the blonde girl chirped in again.

"Wassup, you guys!" Emmett appeared out of nowhere and plopped himself beside Edward.

"Hey, pretty girl." Emmett was leaning forward, tipping the table to his side. It was a good thing there were no plates on the top. He gave me a wink, and I chuckled. Edward elbowed him, and he grunted.

"What was that for, you ass? I was just making sure your girl was doing fine."

"Stop it, you jerk." Edward cocked his eyebrow, and some silent conversation I didn't quite grasp what passed between them. Emmett suddenly became serious when he faced me again, just giving me a smile.

I didn't know these people, other than they were friends of Edward, who incidentally was also almost a stranger to me. If it wasn't for this unexplainable feeling I had that we were both somewhat connected in someway, I would have bailed. The thought of being with someone I couldn't even remember was scary. Alice had said it was jitters just because I knew I had amnesia. I trusted Alice, and I trusted my gut feeling.

The girls were still standing beside our table, eyeing the exchange between the three of us. They were starting to annoy me, and I was about to say something but Emmett cut me off.

"Am I too irresistible for you girls?" He stood up, and folded his arms across his chest, showing off his toned biceps. He towered over the girls, but they seemed not to be intimidated by him. Instead, his obvious flirtation was sending them into another gigglefest.

I was shocked by their blatant ignorance. Emmett was clearly trying to fend them off for Edward, and they thought he was interested. How could they be so stupid?

Emmett showed the girls his muscles. They looked as if they were enjoying the attention he was giving them. Hopefully they weren't as shallow as they seemed to be.

I was too preoccupied with my thoughts when I felt someone staring at me. I turned and saw it was Edward. He had a frown on his face, and his lips were pursed together in a thin line.

"What was that all about?" I thought.

"Goodbye, Edward." The girls were clearly done flirting with Emmett. He somehow made their day. "You too, Bella."

I nodded to the blonde girl. I was a little more reserved than earlier, knowing that the reason they came over was because of my boyfriend, and had nothing to do with me.

Edward didn't respond, clearly irritated now. He still had a frown on his face, and something or someone had bothered him enough for him to look pissed.

"Do you think you can go to class alone? I need to go somewhere," he said quietly. He was irritated, and it bothered me that I might have something to do with it. I wanted to ask him, but his demeanor told me he wouldn't appreciate it now. Maybe I could do it later.

He was waiting for a response, so I just nodded at him.

"Are you sure?" He wasn't being nice anymore, and I was getting irritated with his venting. He was taking out on me whatever was bothering him, and I didn't like it one bit.

I quickly glanced at Emmett who was studiously examining the floor. Surely he could feel the sudden tension that surrounded us with Edward's harsh tone. I took a deep breath and looked back at Edward with my own aggravated stare.

"Yes, I'm sure." My answer was curt. He heard the annoyance in my voice, and he cocked an eyebrow. I just shrugged, and stood up suddenly, surprising both Emmett and him.

"Goodbye, Em."

"Goodbye, Bella. I'll take good care of your man here."

I didn't answer him, just continued to walk out the café. I felt Edward's angry eyes as I left them both staring after me.

What might have ticked Edward off? hmmm...

Anyway, see you next update. :D