"Andy, I can't believe you never told me."
"I know I should've but… I guess I just couldn't you know?"
"No, I don't know. I mean, if we really are friends than why couldn't you tell me? We tell each other everything."
"Except this."
"Why not?" Fresh tears sprang to my eyes and rolled down my cheeks. "Andy, you know you can tell me."

The whole room was silent. We were at Andy's house, his Mum was in the kitchen apparently making coffee but it was taking her a long time. The living room was large and it felt like home. I was quite jealous of Andy and his family. They were all so close and most of them got along. My family was different. My father left when I was young; about three or four. I never saw much of my mother; she was always out, working or at the pub. I'd pretty much been on my own until I met Andy.
"I don't know." Andy hung his head and then looked down at his hand, on my knee and knotted his fingers through mine. I pulled my hand away.
"Well you're the only one who does." I said accusingly.
"But I don't!" Andy protested.
"Then who would, Andy? Please, just tell me. There's a reason; there is always a reason. I don't care what it is, I need to know!"
"No," Andy told me. "You want to know and I don't want to tell you."
"Why not?" I pleaded.
"Because," Andy said. "You're my best friend and I'm you're only friend." He just stared at me for a few long seconds and then said. "I'd rather you didn't know, for our sake."

I just watched Andy as he stood, staring into my eyes before he turned and started up the stairs to his room. I felt so angry. After everything we'd been through together and he didn't trust me enough to tell me. "I HATE YOU." I screamed after him. "YOU'RE A JERK!"

When I got back to Shaun's house – Shaun was my boyfriend and I spent most of my time at his place - he was surprised to see my so upset. He had been writing a song (ironically enough) in his room. I didn't even knock, just walked in and collapsed beside him on the bed. Shaun put his guitar down and stroked my hair. "Hey, are you okay."
I nodded into his shirt but I couldn't stop crying. "You're not are you?" I nodded again, feeling this was all I was capable of.
"What happened?"
I didn't answer at first but then said; "I don't really wanna talk about it."
Shaun nodded. "Okay. We can talk when you're ready."
"No," I choked crying again. "I can't tell you; it's something me and Andy have to work out."
"You and Andy?" Shaun looked suspiciously at me. "Gem, what's this about?"
"I told you, I don't wanna talk about it, 'k?"
"Gemma, tell me now." Shaun scared me, using my full name.
"You don't need to know."
"Yes, I do I'm your boyfriend and I care about you."
"Well, stop caring. This whole stupid thing started because of you! It's your fault and now poor Andy has to suffer while he watches his best friend with the girl he loves." I paused. I had said too much.
"Gemma… I- what's going on? Tell me… now!"
"Listen Shaun, I'd love to tell you but I can't because I don't know!" I started crying again. "After everything we've been through, it seems Andy doesn't trust me enough to tell me."
Shaun cuddled me. "Baby, I'm so sorry, I had no idea."
"I don't what to do!" I cried into his shirt.
"Maybe you should talk to Andy." He suggested.
"I've tried that, Andy doesn't want to talk… maybe you should try."
"Honey, I don't think Andy wanted you to tell me, he can't know that I know."
"You're right." I admitted. "But I'm so stuck."

I stared down at my hands and then I noticed a music sheet on Shaun's knee. "What's this?"
Shaun blushed. He didn't like people to see his songs. "Nothing, just something I'm writing. It doesn't have a name yet."
"Oh," I read the first line; Bled dry, a bullet never lies, look into my eyes girl, would I lie to you?
"You wanna hear it?" He asked.
"Sure." I said.

I sat there a listened to Shaun sing, not paying attention to it but instead thinking of Andy. How long had he felt this way? Why hadn't I seen it before? He needed me and some part of me needed him. But I had Shaun and I loved Shaun… lots. I was stuck, really stuck but I figured what I needed was Mrs Diviney.

She was sitting at the kitchen table; a cup of peppermint tea (I could smell it) clutched in both her hands, an unfolded basket of washing beside her, looking defeated. When I approached her she sighed as I picked up Shaun's Blink 182 shirt of the top of the pile and folded it carefully.
"You don't have to do that." She told me.
"I don't mind." I answered picking up another of Shaun's t-shirts. He seemed to wear a lot of clothes.
Mrs Diviney watched me. "I washed that one yesterday." She sighed.
"Wouldn't surprise me." I said. "Mrs Diviney, can I talk to you?"
"Sure," She said, pulling out a chair beside her. I refused it, folding an orange towel this time. "What's on your mind."
"It's complicated." I told her. "I've just been to visit Andy and…" I trailed of.
"And?"
"Well, he… he likes me… a lot."
Mrs Diviney nodded. "I think I know where this is going."
I was relieved. "And when I told Shaun … he said I should talk to Andy about it but…"
Mrs Diviney was still watching me intently listening. I placed Shaun's jeans, folded, on top of the pile.
"But, I tried, Mrs Diviney and Andy doesn't want to talk about it."
"So what now?" Mrs Diviney asked. She clearly didn't get it.
"Mrs Diviney… have you heard Andy's song he wrote?"
"Yes, what about it?" I pulled the folded square from my pocket and handed it to her. She unfolded it carefully and studied it closely. She folded it again placing it on the table. "I see…" she said vaguely as if this conversation had drained her energy. "You're in a bit of fix aren't you, Gemma?"