Shinigami-cat: Hi people! Well... I OWN NOTHING!

Project: super model

It was just another ordinary day until Francis answered the phone and decided to put it on speaker. "Hello?"

"Hi boys I saw Matthew on the TV the other night." Said the Land lady.

Gilbert swore. Feliciano turned white. Roderich dropped his sheet music. Francis gulped. "Um... really?"

"Yes... What the hell was he doing kissing a skull? You haven't forgotten our deal have you? You're meant to turn Matthew into a gentleman to get free rent!"

"WE'RE SORRY!" Cried Feliciano.

"... But I'll give you boys one more chance. I've already emailed the details to Roderich because he's the most responsible and if you boys screw this up you will have to pay THREE TIMES the current rent. Good luck."

"THREE TIMES THE RENT?" Screamed Gilbert. "We already owe her money!"

Roderich walked over to the computer and checked his emails. His jaw dropped. "I... I can't believe it..."

"What is it?" Asked Francis.

Roderich gulped. "A world famous photographer saw Matthew on TV and offered him a job..."

Feliciano's eyes went wide. "Matthew's going to be a model?"

"Impossible." Said Gilbert. "Totally impossible. He'll never go for it. We are screwed. Dead. Finished. We'll have to pay three times the rent. It will never work. Matthew will never agree to do this. We can kiss our free rent goodbye."

Roderich shrugged. "Maybe... I have an idea..."

XoXoXo at the scene of the photo shoot oXoXoX

Matthew was over the moon. Roderich told him all about a castle out in the middle of the woods and said that since Matthew was such a good sporty about the whole Gilbert kissing him thing that they would go there and check it out. 'Maybe I'll see a vampire or a headless horseman or a ghost!'

"They say it's haunted." Said Francis.

"Ve, isn't it cool." Said Feliciano.

Matthew happily opened the door of the castle and walked inside. He was immediately grabbed by a girl with copper red hair and a girl with curly brown hair and was dragged to get his makeup done. The boys waved goodbye to him and wished him luck.

"NOOOOOOOOO!" Screamed Matthew as he waved his arms and legs around.

"Cackling Grackle!" Cried the girl with red hair. "Help me hold him still!"

"I'm trying Bow Meister Artemis!" Said Crackling Grackle. "Are you sure the boss wants this one?"

"Like totally." Said the boss. "I Feliks Łukasiewicz like never make mistakes!"

"YES SIR!" Said the girls. "SORRY SIR!"

"That boy is like just what I've been looking for." Said Feliks. "His pale skin... soft blond hair... He's like a totally poor innocent virgin who's about to be sacrificed. Plus he's also like the perfect uke." The image of Matthew's small frame in the arms of a larger muscular man danced in his head.

Bow Meister Artemis tilted her head "He is?"

"Sir!" Said Crackling Grackle. "We've done everything we can to him."

"Like that's totally awesome! Let's see!" Said Feliks happily. But when Matthew stepped out he looked like one of those creepy dolls that always seem to be on the shelfs of a crazy person in a horror movie. "LIKE WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?" Cried Feliks.

Bow Meister Artemis pouted. "We did everything we could!"

"Idiots... Not even a vampire would notice him!"

Matthew suddenly nodded like he understood everything. 'I see.' He thought. 'They dressed me up like this as a decoy so I could flush out the ghosts and spirits... I'm so lucky.'

"HE'S FREAKING ME OUT!" Cried Crackling Grackle. "THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH HIM!"

Feliks pouted and picked up his camera. "No. I think he'll look great on camera. Let's start shooting!" The click of a camera made Matthew gasp in shock. He hates cameras.

XoXoXo outside oXoXoX

Francis Roderich and Feliciano were sitting on the grass while Gilbert was running around trying to catch bats. "Do you guys think Matthew will let them take his picture?" Asked Francis.

Feliciano shrugged. "Maybe we should check on him."

Suddenly the doors burst open and Matthew came running out as fast as he could. Crackling Grackle and Bow Mister Artemis were running after him. "What are you doing?" Cried Roderich.

"NO CAMERAS!" Screamed Matthew. "NO CAMERAS!"

"Damn." Hissed Roderich. "Catch him Gilbert!"

"I'm on it!" Yelled Gilbert. He ran after Matthew.

Francis turned to the girls and put on his best smile. "So sorry about our friend." He said.

"He can be a bit of a handful at times." Said Roderich.

"Ve we'll keep an eye on him from now on." Said Feliciano.

Crackling Grackle and Bow Mister Artemis blushed at the amazingly hot guys in front of them. Feliks walked out. "Like where is Matthew... wow."

"I got him." Called Gilbert. He was carrying Matthew back by the collar of his shirt. Suddenly Feliks ran up to Gilbert and beamed.

"OMG! Perfect skin! Perfect height! You like totally have to model for me!" He cried.

Gilbert gulped, dropped Matthew and ran for his life. He ran inside the castle and up a couple of flights of stairs until he was sure no one was following him. He chuckled. "Me? A model? Give me a break... I guess I'll just hide here until the photo shoots over." He lied down and fell asleep.

XoXoXo back on set oXoXoX

Feliks was on the verge of pulling out his hair. Matthew wasn't photogenic at all. "Okay... let's like take some photos with that girl next... Like where is she?"

"Bad news boss." Said Bow Meister Artemis. "She's broken her leg. We can't shoot a girl today."

"Like seriously?" Asked Feliks in disbelief. "But I wanted to at least shoot a girl today!" He pouted and looked over at Francis, Roderich and Feliciano. "Like get the little happy looking one made up now!"

Crackling Grackle and Bow Mister Artemis grabbed Feliciano and dragged him away. "Ve? What's going on?"

"His skin is so smooth!" Squealed Crackling Grackle. And his hair is so soft like a kitten!"

"To bad we have to cover it up with a wig..." Sighed Bow Mister Artemis. "Now come on. Take off your clothes!"

"VE?"

Soon they were done with Feliciano's makeup and clothes. Feli walked out and began to cry. He was in a Victorian style gown, complete with high heels, gloves and long light brown wig. Roderich patted Feli on the back. "Sorry."

"We really are Feli." Said Francis.

"Ve it's not your fault... but why am I the only one dressed as a girl... I hate dressing like a girl."

"But you look so cute!" Said Francis. "Think of the rent!"

"Wow." Said Crackling Grackle. "He looks just like a girl."

Feliks sighed. "He's like not exactly what I wanted but it'll work." He picked up his camera. "Okay I like want to see a touch of despair with a bit of eroticism."

"I can't be erotic." Mumbled Feliciano miserably.

"Like be more feminine!"

"But I'm a guy..."

Feliks put down his camera. "This is like so not erotic enough... get those two other guys into makeup."

Roderich and Francis gasped. "WHAT? NO WAY!"

Crackling Grackle grabbed Francis's arm and smiled sweetly at him. "It's no big deal. I think you'll look really sexy with a red silk scarf."

"That's right." Said Bow Mister Artemis as she grabbed Roderich's arm. "And you'll look really hot with a dark purple scarf."

"So we aren't going to be dressed as girls?" Asked Roderich.

"Of course not!" Exclaimed Bow Mister Artemis. "Why would we do that?"

Once they were out of made up they joined Feliciano on set as two of the hottest, sexiest (and not sparkly) vampires you have ever seen. "Okay let's like get to work!" Said Feliks.

XoXoXo one hour later oXoXoX

"Okay like take a break you guys." Said Feliks happily.

Feliciano walked over to Matthew and gave him a cup of coffee. Matthew was still trying to flush out ghosts. "Hope you like the coffee Matthew."

Matthew nodded and took a sip of the coffee. "Thanks Feli."

Feliciano sat next to Matthew and sighed. "Ve... I hate dressing like this... Do I really look that much like a girl? I know Ludwig said he doesn't care how I dress but..."

"Who's Ludwig?" Asked Matthew.

"My boyfriend." Said Feliciano. "He's also Gilbert's younger brother... He doesn't go to our school. Everyone thinks he's really scary but he's so nice and kind and so considerate of others... even if he has a strange way of showing it..."

Matthew nodded. "I still don't see why you hate dressing like a girl."

Feliciano sighed. "When I was younger this girl in out street used to dress me up in all these dresses and I got used to it. I really like wearing the dresses and stuff. It made me feel comfortable but then people started teasing me and my fratello. They said that since I was a transvestite homo he must be a transvestite homo too. I hated how upset my fratello became because of it I swore I would never dress like a girl again. I guess moving into the Land ladies boarding house was a good thing. Fratello doesn't have to be ashamed of me anymore."

'That's so sad...' Thought Matthew. 'How could someone be that insensitive?'

"But I wish I was tough like Gilbert or as smart as Roderich or laidback like Francis or as cool as you Matthew. You guys are so lucky."

Matthew looked at Feliciano in disbelief. 'What's he talking about? He's the lucky one. He's so cute no one can stay mad at him for long and everyone loves him. Why does he think I'm cool?'

"Like Feliciano!" Called Feliks. "I want to go over the next shoot with you while you like get your makeup touched up."

Feliciano sighed. "Okay..." He got up and followed Feliks.

"I'm like so lucky you guys were here." He said. "I like made a total mistake with that Matthew kid. I was like totally conned."

Feliciano frowned. "You were the one that hired Matthew without even knowing him. How could you say that?"

Feliks rolled his eyes. "Like I said. I was like conned. This TV totally tricked me. I like had no idea Matthew was that ugly." Feliciano glared at Feliks. Famous photographer or not there was no way he could call Matthew ugly. He pulled off the wig, gloves, dress and kicked of the shoes. He was wearing his jeans underneath. "Like what are you doing?"

Feliciano ignored him and walked over to Matthew. "Matthew." He said. "There are no ghosts here let's go home."

Roderich and Francis walked around the corner and saw Feliciano. "What are you doing Feli?" Asked Francis.

"LIKE FINE!" Yelled Feliks. "You might look like a girl but you so don't know how to act like one! And you call yourself a transvestite!"

Feliciano's eyes went wide. "What? T... transvestite? Ve?"

Matthew stood up and walked over to Feliks's camera. He picked it up and threw it on the ground. Smashing it to pieces. "Oh no he didn't!" Gasped Crackling Grackle.

Feliks dropped to his knees and picked up the pieces of his camera. "My... my camera... YOU BETTER LIKE PAY FOR IT YOU BITCH!"

XoXoXo somewhere in the house oXoXoX

Gilbert's eyes snapped open. "PAY FOR IT? SHIT! WE HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE!" He stood up and started to run. Unfortunately he happened to step on a rotted floor board. So he ended up stumbling and falling forward through a window.

"WHAT WAS THAT?" Screamed Bow Mister Artemis.

"A GHOST?" Cried Crackling Grackle.

Matthew gasped and blushed. 'A ghost? A real live ghost? I have to find it!' He ran off with Francis, Roderich and Feliciano following him. They ran into a room and standing there was Gilbert; covered in cuts and blood. Crackling Grackle and Bow Mister Artemis screamed.

Matthew rolled his eyes and pouted. "It's just Gilbert."

"You tried to run away without us didn't you? You bastard." Growled Francis.

Gilbert shook his head. "No it-" Blood shot out of his head and Gilbert fainted.

"We have to get out of here." Said Francis.

"Like hold it right there!" Cried Feliks. "Do you like have any idea what an honour it is to be like photographed by me? I could have like made you all like total international celebrities!"

Matthew turned to Feliks. "We don't give a damn."

Bow Mister Artemis blinked and rubbed her eyes. "Is it just me or does he actually look really awesome right now?"

Crackling Grackle shook her head. "Not just awesome. He looks hot. How is that possible?"

Matthew picked up Gilbert bridal style and walked off with Roderich, Feliciano and Feliks quickly following. Feliks thought for a second. "Like get me my spare camera."

XoXoXo a few weeks later oXoXoX

"I finally got my stitches out." Sighed Gilbert. "If I wasn't out cold I would have kicked that photographer's ass."

Francis walked into the room with a large envelope. "Hey guys we actually got payed for doing that photo shoot."

"Seriously?" Asked Roderich. "How much?"

"$5,000. In cash."

Gilbert grinned and pinched Feliciano's cheek. "And it's all because of you!"

"There are also tickets to see his art show." Said Francis. "Want to go?"

XoXoXo at the exhibit oXoXoX

They all went to the exhibit. They even persuaded Matthew to go along too. Once they got in some girls squealed. "OMG it's the guys from the picture!"

"You four look so hot in that picture!"

"Where's the blond guy with the glasses? Isn't he with you? He looked so sexy!"

"All four of us?" Questioned Gilbert.

"Are they talking about Matthew?" Asked Feliciano.

"Where did he go?" Asked Francis.

"He wandered off again." Said Roderich.

"It's amazing isn't it?" Said Shinigami-cat. "Everyone's been talking about it!"

"IT'S THE LAND LADY!"

"Hi boys I'm back!" She beamed.

"What are you doing back in America?" Asked Francis.

Shinigami-cat giggled. "I was in DC silly with Toris. That's where I saw Matthew on TV."

"So you still keep Toris around?" Asked Roderich.

"Of course." Said Shinigami-cat. "He's been my butler ever since my husband died. I can't just fire him. He's like family!"

"But what's this about the picture?" Asked Feliciano.

Shinigami-cat beamed and pointed to a photo. Matthew was carrying Gilbert's cut and bloodied body as Feliciano Roderich and Francis followed. Then they saw the title of the picture. Feast beneath the moon light.

"That's it." Growled Gilbert. "I'm going to kill him."

"Anyway..." Said Shinigami-cat. "You boys got payed right? And you haven't payed rent in a while... You boys owe me $5,000."

"NO WAY!" Cried Gilbert. "My hospital bills were expensive!"

"Then go live in Canada... or Australia or something. They have universal health care." Stated Shinigami-cat. "Well... I'm off to Japan. I have an appointment at a spa."

"Why did you even bother coming back?" Asked Francis.

"Well... to be honest I thought the photographer was kind of cute... but then he started hitting on Toris so I'm getting us the hell out of here. Later!"

"Bye Land lady." They called.

"So you boys like came." Said Feliks. "Huh? Like where did Shinigami-cat and her cute butler go?"

"They went back to Japan." Said Roderich.

"Oh... okay... Well anyway... Thanks for like all you help in like creating such a beautiful shot. So like where is Matthew? Everybody is like dying to meet him."

"... He didn't come with us." Lied Gilbert.

"That's like too bad." Said Feliks.

Over the other side of the exhibit Matthew was drooling over a picture of a grave yard filled with skulls, vines, and dug up graves. "I want this one."

To be continued maybe...

Shinigami-cat: YAY NEXT CHAPTER IS DONE!