Shinigami-cat: Okay then... This is going to be fun... I OWN NOTHING!

Project: blind date part 1

It all started with a video letter from the Land lady. "... So this is the man I'm going to marry!"

Feliciano smiled. "He seems like a nice guy."

Gilbert smirked. "This is the Land lady Feli. She'll probably get tired of him and cancel the wedding when she sees something shiny."

"Oh and I got good news for Matthew too!" Said the Land lady. "I'm coming home next week with my sweet heart and a friend of his. I'm going to set Matthew up with him!"

Everyone in the room felt there heart stop. The Land lady was going to set Matthew up on a blind date... This could not end well...

XoXoXo in Matthew's room oXoXoX

Matthew momentarily looked from his book at the creatures of light that invaded his room. "No way."

"COME ON!" Yelled Gilbert. "We're talking about a blind date here! You can't just stand around and smile like you did last time! You need to get used to being around people and light! It's time for you to become a gentleman!" Matthew ignored them. Gilbert growled and snatched Matthew's book out of his hands.

"Just tell her I won't do it!" Said Matthew.

Gilbert glared at Matthew "Apparently... you have no idea how scary that woman can be."

Roderich, Feliciano and Francis grabbed Sally, John and Kumajiro. They held knifes up to them. "This time." Said Feliciano. "We're serious."

Matthew quickly pulled out a knife he had hidden in his pocket. He swung it at them successfully cutting off a few strands of hair from each of them. "I'm serious too."

"Just check out the video she sent us!" Cried Feliciano.

"Your knife is nothing compared to her!" Said Roderich. While they were distracting Matthew Gilbert quickly ran behind Matthew, disarmed him and tied him up.

"To the lounge room." He said. Several seconds later Matthew was in the lounge room watching the video she sent them.

"Matthew love is wonderful!" Said the Land lady. "It will change your world! Every day will become as sweet as roses! Let's find true happiness... Oh P.S Gilbert, Feli, Roderich, Francis... You guys better not screw up or I'll kill you."

"Now do you get it?" Asked Gilbert. "She's just crazy enough to kill us if she finds out about this!"

"So scary." Whimpered Feliciano.

Matthew frowned. 'That wasn't scary at all. I know what it's like to be in love... Jason makes my heart stop. Freddy gives me butterflies... I've already found happiness... Happiness is being in the dark surrounded by my friends... Kuma, Sally, John... and then there's Jack the Ripper, Charles Manson and Henry Lee Lucas... I get goose bumps just thinking about them... If that's not true love than what is?'

"Okay Matthew time for rehearsal!" Said Feliciano. Matthew snapped out of his own thoughts for a second and looked over at Feliciano, Roderich and Francis. They were dressed in amazing cloths and looked even more handsome and sexy than normal.

"You just have to be yourself." Said Roderich.

"You'll be fine." Said Feliciano.

"Your date will make all the important moves so just relax." Said Francis.

Matthew's nose began to bleed and his eyes began to roll into the back of his head. "HEY DON'T YOU DARE FAINT!" Yelled Gilbert. "Listen if she finds out you aren't a gentleman you'll be in big trouble too! She'll make you learn how to play some classical instrument, you'll never be able to wear hoodies again, she'll make you stop watching horror movies and make you go to some finishing school!"

Matthew fainted. "Ve! Matthew! Wake up!" Cried Feliciano.

"Now's our chance!" Said Francis. "Let's change his cloths and get him made up!"

XoXoXo one hour later oXoXoX

Matthew walked out of his room. Feliciano hid behind Gilbert and began to cry. Gilbert giggled. "He looks like an antique doll." Said Roderich.

"Yeah!" Said Francis. "Like one of those one's you hear about in horror movies!"

"Let's just get this over with." Growled Matthew. Everyone agreed and walked into the dining room where Matthew was to have tea with Roderich. As soon as he sat down across from Roderich Matthew began to sweat and hyperventilate.

"Just calm down Matthew!" Said Roderich.

"Just be yourself!" Said Francis.

Roderich took a deep breath and took a sip of tea. "What are your hobbies Matthew?"

Matthew gulped. "Well I like watching movies and reading."

Feliciano and Francis high fived. Matthew was making small talk! Roderich smiled. "I've just finished reading Dazai's complete works what do you read?"

A sinister smirk stretched across Matthew's face. "I enjoy reading psychological analysis of serial killers. You know, like people who cut off a person's XXX And put it in the mouth of a XXXX or people who remove a person's XXX and eat them while the victim is still alive. There're even people who use a human XXXX as a bowl and eat out of it. You know Dahmer used to drill a hole in a person's XXX and pour acid all over there XXXX and the he would..."

Roderich couldn't take it anymore he ran out of the room and vomited. "This... This can't be happening!" He said.

Gilbert turned to Feliciano. "Okay time for a walk in the garden Feliciano."

Feliciano blinked back a tear. "Okay... I'll try!"

A few seconds later Matthew and Feliciano were walking in the garden by the rose bushes. 'Too bright!' Thought Matthew. 'Too freaking bright!'

Feliciano smiled. "Ve, aren't the roses pretty Matthew? They smell really good." He reached out to pick one when he suddenly pulled back. "Ouch!" Matthew looked at Feliciano. He had cut his hand. Matthew took Feliciano's cut hand in his.

"Oh dear..." He sighed.

"I guess Feliciano's his type." Said Francis.

Suddenly Matthew grabbed Feliciano's arm and slammed it into the rose bush, cutting up his arm. Feliciano screamed and ran to Roderich who quickly wrapped up his arm. Matthew on the other hand was giggling at the blood on his fingertips.

"That's Matthew when he's acting normal?" Asked Roderich.

"There's nothing normal about him." Sobbed Feliciano.

"Well it's hopeless." Said Gilbert.

"But the Land lady will probably make us pay three times the normal rent if she finds out!" Cried Feliciano.

"NO WAY!" Cried Gilbert. "I know! We'll hypnotize him!"

Roderich sighed. "Gilbert's lost it..."

"Oh honhonhonhonhon!" Laughed Francis. "You guys are so naïve. This is a job for Francis Bonnefoy! Lover extraordinaire! If you want him to be a gentleman, you have to treat him like a gentleman. A beautiful man or woman is like a precious gem, polish them with love and they will shine and sparkle forever." He pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket and handed it to them. "The ultimate date scenario."

"Pick your date up in a car..." Read Roderich.

"Take them to afternoon tea at a five star hotel..." Read Feliciano.

"Then take them to the premier of a French film" Read Gilbert. "... Than dinner... then... There's no way a normal teenager could come up with this."

"Ve so he did learn something from hanging out with all those rich married people." Said Feliciano.

"So what you're saying..." Said Roderich. "Is if Matthew gets used to being treated like a gentleman he might turn into one... That makes sense."

XoXoXo half an hour later at a five star hotel oXoXoX

Matthew was sitting across from Francis in a five star hotel freaking out. 'Why do I have to be here? It's so bright! Too bright!'

"The blueberry tart here is to die for Matthew." Said Francis. "They also have over forty different kinds of tea here, if you want it."

Matthew began to sweat. He pulled his knees up to his chest and began to rock back and forth. 'I hate this! I want to go home!'

"Matthew? Are you okay?" Asked Francis. Suddenly all the lights went out and a woman tapped Francis on the shoulder.

"Francis do you remember me?" She asked. "You dumped me a long time ago." Francis's eyes widened and he slowly turned around behind him were all the ghosts from his past both men and women.

"I feel in love with you at first sight..."

"I've been stalking you..."

"He's mine."

"NO HE'S MINE!"

Suddenly Francis was being attacked by the group. "Crap." Said Roderich. "Matthew's negative aura must be attracting all the ghosts from Francis's past!"

"It's up to you now Gilbert!" Said Feliciano. "Finish the date with Matthew!"

Gilbert really didn't want to but he grabbed Matthew and ran out of there as fast as he could. "You are seriously more trouble than you're worth." He growled.

XoXoXo a safe distance away from the disaster at the hotel oXoXoX

Gilbert was reading over the date scenario. "Now we have to watch a French film? Boring... Make sure you always walk next to your date never in front... What a pain in the ass... Don't forget to laugh and smile every so often... Yeah right..."

Matthew was freaking out. He was shaking and sweat was rolling down his neck. 'Why...? Why am I out here in the sun? Why do I have to be surrounded by all these creature of the light?'

Gilbert looked at Matthew and growled. "Hey I don't like crowds any more than you do. Suck it up."

CLICK! Gilbert turned to see a guy holing a camera. "You have such a great look." Said the photographer. "You should model for our magazine."

Gilbert growled and ripped the film out of the camera. "Hell no."

"OMG!" Said a girl. "Check out that hot guy!" Five seconds later Gilbert was surrounded by people.

"You should be in showbiz!"

"Come to my office!"

"No come to mine!"

"What are you doing later?"

"Can I have your phone number?"

While the commotion was going on Matthew had been pushed to the ground. "Now's my chance to escape!" He said. Someone stepped on his back. "Fuck!"

"FUCK OFF!" Yelled Gilbert. He grabbed the photographer and swung him around to clear the way. "Can't you see I'm already with someone?" He crouched down next to Matthew and helped him to his feet. "I'm on a date. Quit bothering me." They quickly got out of the crowd and went to the movie theatre.

"Do we really have to do this? For two hours?" Gilbert asked himself. "I can do this... I'm awesome! I'm fucking awesome!"

Matthew sighed. "Let's just go home. Watching a movie and going on a date isn't going to turn me into a gentleman."

"But you have to try!" Said Gilbert. "If you don't the Land lady will lock you up and throw away the key!"

"But it won't change me." Said Matthew. "Why bother?"

Gilbert frowned and looked down at the date plan. He ripped it in half and grabbed Matthew. "Come with me."

XoXoXo at the arcade oXoXoX

Gilbert was wacking some crocodiles with a hammer. "This is more like it!" He said. "Screw fancy dinners! Screw French movies!"

Matthew rolled his eyes. "I'm going home... OMFG!" He saw an awesome zombie gun game and started to shoot.

"Wow that scary guy got a high score!"

"That handsome guy got a high score too!"

"That scary guy got a high score again!"

"So did the handsome guy!"

XoXoXo back at the house several hour later oXoXoX

"... so to sum it up... Birdie and I did nothing on the list." Said Gilbert.

"What are we going to do about the rent?" Growled a badly bruised Feliciano.

"Do you have any idea how much we suffered?" Snapped Francis as he put a band aid on his chin. "Well... did you have fun?"

"Well I haven't been to the arcade in a while..." Said Gilbert.

"So you did have fun." Said Francis. "You had fun on your date with Matthew."

Roderich snapped his fingers and grinned. "I got it! We'll just tell the Land lady that you and Matthew are dating! She'll believe that!"

"SAY WHAT?" Asked Gilbert.

"Congratulations Gilbert." Said Francis. "You finally have a boyfriend."

Gilbert went pail and fell to his knees. "My... my life is over... My life is over..."

To be continued maybe...

Shinigami-cat: There! How will Matthew react to this? Find out in the next chapter! Please review!