The next time Santana went to New York, it wasn't to see Brittany.
There was only so much she could take of only having phone calls and skype sessions. Months of just hearing Brittany's voice, or being able to see her but knowing she was so far away, it was torture. It hadn't been easy for them to establish what they were doing, but they had managed to slap the dating label on it. That had been a scary step for both of them, but they had taken that step. It was hard for each of them in different ways.
Santana hated not being able to be there with her. She had always been really in touch with the physical aspects of relationships, and not just when it came to sex. Of course that was a big part, but sometimes she just wanted to hug her. When Brittany was sad, all Santana wanted to do was hug her and hold her and make her feel like everything was going to be fine. The fact that she couldn't do that made her feel like the worst girlfriend in the world.
Brittany was still scared about the distance between them. It wasn't the fact that last time, Santana had hurt her so badly. It was more that she didn't like how far away they were. Yes, being so far apart brought back some of those feelings, even though she had so much reassurance that it would never happen again. The last thing Santana wanted was to hurt her again, and especially not like that. That was why she wanted to be closer to her. That was why she was in New York.
She had been working so hard to be good at her job. All she wanted was a flawless resume, and a stunning recommendation from her boss. So despite the fact that most of the time her thoughts were somewhere else, she did everything she could to do her job well. It also helped that she had always been driven to be the best at whatever she was doing. That was how she had gotten through school with the grades she did, got a good job straight out of college, and managed to get an interview at a publishing company in New York.
That trip had been much better planned than her impromptu trip months before. She got there a day early and settled in at a hotel closer to her interview than Brittany's apartment. As much as she wanted to see her girlfriend, she thought it was better if she didn't. Right in that moment, right then, she just needed to focus on the task at hand. Once she had her interview, once she got the job, that was when she could tell Brittany.
More than anything she wanted to tell Brittany what she was doing, that she was trying to get a job close to her so they could actually see each other. That was how much she meant to her. She had no reservations with packing up and moving if it meant she got to be closer to Brittany. It helped that the job she interviewed for was better than the one she currently had. The fact that she had gotten past the phone interview and had moved on to the interview in person, that was a big step for her. It felt like it was real, even if she hadn't gotten the job yet. She was that much closer to it. But she didn't want to tell Brittany just in case she didn't get it. Building up her hopes just to let them down was not on Santana's to-do list.
Besides, Brittany had enough going on for her. She was working so hard at her own career, the last thing she needed added to her plate was something to worry about for Santana's sake. There was a reason their phone calls usually ended because Brittany was falling asleep, and why Santana usually got to see her nodding off when they were skyping. She was working so hard and dancing so much that by the time she got home, she was just done and ready to crash. No matter how tired she was, though, she always made time to talk to Santana. Even if it meant that she was missing out on some sleep that she wanted so badly. All that was why she didn't tell Brittany about her interview, and also because she didn't see a reason for her to stress over something that she didn't have anything to do with. At least not directly.
As far as the actual interview, it went as well as could be expected. If there was anyone who was confident and self assured when it came to those types of situations, it was Santana Lopez. She knew she was good at her job, and she had no problem telling anyone about it. Especially when those people were potentially going to hire her. When it came to people she needed to impress, she had no problem talking herself up.
The other reason she didn't tell Brittany she was there was because she was barely there at all. She flew in the day before the interview, and then left the night after. Less than forty-eight hours in the city wasn't exactly optimal time to accomplish what she came there to do and spend enough time with Brittany to make it seem like she was only there for her. Sometimes it was easier not to say anything.
There were other people up for the job, of course, and they had told her they were doing interviews all week. Going back to work without knowing how she stood in regards to the job was stressful. She knew she was putting all her eggs in one basket but she didn't have much of a choice. There were only so many jobs, so many opportunities, and she had only gotten one interview.
When she got that call, the call she got the job, she had barely been able to finish the phone call in a dignified manner before punching the end button on her cell phone, clutching it to her chest, and jumping around her apartment. There was more triumphant yelling and fist pumping than she was particularly proud of, but she didn't care. She just was so excited and so happy and all she wanted to do was tell Brittany and be able to hug her and celebrate it with her.
That was why she decided to wait until she was actually in New York to tell her.
Leaving her current job had not been difficult. Her boss and coworkers were aware that she was attempting to get a job elsewhere, not because she was unhappy there but because she wanted to move, and they were more supportive of her endeavors than she had expected. It helped, she supposed, that she had been so much happier since she and Brittany had started being friends again, started dating again. She actually did feel sad when she told them she was leaving. While she hadn't been particularly close to anyone there, they were all on fairly friendly terms.
When it came to her living situation, Santana was torn. She knew she needed to get a jump on finding an apartment. Two weeks between her last day at her former job and her first day at her new one was not much time to get all her stuff packed and to the city, but especially not when she didn't even have a place to live. Of course she had been researching apartments while she waited to hear back from the company on whether or not she got the job, but that didn't mean she had gotten around to applying for any of them.
Packing up her life in Ohio wasn't easy. There was only so much she could do at a time before she got overwhelmed by it all. She just took it step by step, room by room, day by day. By the end of the week, she had everything but her bathroom essentials and some of her clothes packed. That was why she went back to New York. Because she was done packing, because she needed to check out some apartments, and because she had to tell Brittany.
There was a different type of nervousness that time, as she stood outside Brittany's apartment building. She knew the other girl was home, as she'd gotten a text saying that she was done with rehearsal early. There were still some butterflies in her stomach as she hit the speed dial number for her girlfriend.
"Hi!" Brittany answered brightly, and Santana smiled as she leaned against the wall beside the door. "Did you get out of work early or something?"
"Something like that, kind of," Santana said, chewing on her lip a little. "You're at home, right?"
"Right."
"So, want to come let me in?" There was a long pause on the other end of the phone, and then a thud. "Brit?" She heard a lot of noises, but no words in response from Brittany, and then a door slamming closed. "Brittany?" There was nothing but silence and she looked at her phone to make sure the call hadn't been dropped, but then the door beside her was pulled open and there she was.
Santana had just stepped away from the wall when Brittany threw herself onto her, arms and legs holding on tight, and she just slipped her arms around the blonde girl to hug her in return. "You're here!" Brittany said into the crook of her neck, where her face was buried. She was clinging onto her so closely and Santana didn't want to let go.
"I'm here," she repeated, kissing against her hair. "I'm here, Brit." She held her tightly until she felt the other girl's death-grip on her loosening a little. "Can we go up?"
"Yeah," Brittany said, dropping her feet down to the ground and taking hold of Santana's hand as she dug into her pocket for her key. They made their way up to her apartment and once they were inside, Brittany pulled her in close and kissed her. There it was, that feeling she got in her stomach that replaced all the nerves and butterflies that had been there before. That feeling she got when Brittany kissed her was so much better than all that. Her lips parted with a sigh as Brittany's tongue flicked over them, but she pulled back after a long moment.
"Brit, I have to tell you something," she said, cupping the other girl's face in her hands as she looked up at her. There was immediately so much concern on Brittany's face, and she continued quickly. "No, it's a good something."
"What is it?"
"What if I told you we didn't just have to talk on the phone and we could see each other for real instead of just on the computer?" Santana asked quietly, feeling her nerves coming back a bit. It had been a bigger step than she liked to think about, but that step had been taken and there was no turning back. Brittany just tilted her head, her brow furrowed a little, and Santana slid her hands down her arms and laced their fingers together. "I got a job here in New York."
It took about three seconds for those words to sink in, and then Brittany was jumping onto her. Santana hadn't been ready for that, and she stumbled back a step and hit the wall. Her head hit it kind of hard but she couldn't find it in her to care, the way that Brittany was kissing her. This time, her nerves were gone for two reasons: the kissing, and also the fact that the kissing meant that her girlfriend was happy with what she had done.
"You got a job here?" Brittany asked as she pulled away, her eyes searching Santana's as she waited for an answer, a confirmation that she hadn't just heard things wrong or something like that. When Santana nodded, Brittany just pressed in against her, their foreheads resting together for a moment. "Are you here now? Like, for good?"
"Not yet," she answered, and Brittany's expression fell a little. "In a week I will be. I just came here now so I could find an apartment."
"What do you mean?" Brittany's brow furrowed and she frowned. Santana quirked an eyebrow, tilting her head as she looked at her girlfriend. "Why aren't you going to stay here?"
"I... well, I could. If you want." It wasn't that Santana hadn't considered that option, she just didn't want to rely on it. She totally understood the concept of needing her own space, and she didn't want Brittany to feel like she was pushing all this on her if she didn't want it. Even now, she still felt like she needed to be careful about that sort of thing. Brittany didn't seem to be as worried as she was.
"Of course I want you to stay here," she said, leaning in and pressing a soft kiss against her lips. "That way I can see you every single day. We can have breakfast together and cuddle and not have to talk about tv shows on the phone cause we'll be watching them at the same place." Santana smiled, reaching up to brush her hair out of her eyes. Brittany paused, looking down for a moment. "I can't believe you got a job here. That's the best thing anyone's ever done for me."
"I just couldn't stand to be so far away from you anymore," Santana said softly, and Brittany's gaze met hers again. "I hated not being able to hug you, touch you, kiss you, any of that. It hurt not to be able to be with you." Brittany leaned in and kissed her, slow and long, her hand moving up to cup the back of Santana's neck. It seemed like slow motion, the way every brush of their lips together seemed to last forever.
"Well you can do all that now," Brittany murmured, her body pressed in so close against Santana she felt like she could feel the other girl's heartbeat. Her fingers twined into Santana's hair at the nape of her neck, tightening a little, and Santana's lips fell open with a soft sigh. Not wasting any time, Brittany kissed her again, taking advantage of her parted lips and slipping her tongue into her mouth.
After months of seeing and hearing but not touching, that kiss was like heaven. Her hands slid down to Brittany's waist and pulled her hips in closer, their legs tangling together. What started out as such a sweet, soft kiss quickly turned heated, and Santana moaned into her mouth as their tongues slid together. The way Brittany's free hand was roaming all over her body, the way her fingers were tugging lightly at her hair, it was all just turning Santana on quicker than she realized. It made it just that much more so when Brittany rutted up against her leg.
"Fuck, Brit," she groaned as she broke away from her mouth, her hands sliding down and grabbing her ass as she rocked their hips together. Brittany just whimpered in response, leaving open mouthed kisses along Santana's neck as her hand slid down her torso. The muscles in Santana's stomach jumped as Brittany's fingers skimmed over it, and she tightened her fingers in Brittany's shirt as the other girl undid the fastenings on her jeans.
A low groan sounded deep in her throat as Brittany's fingers forced their way past the thick denim of her jeans and over the thin cotton of her panties. Those long, slender fingers felt so good against her and it wasn't even skin on skin contact yet. It had been far too long since they'd had the chance - since that first time Santana went to visit her. They had pretty much spent the most of their time together in bed, pretending like they were helping Brittany avoid going back to the apartment while Ricky was moving out.
She whined a little as Brittany's hand pulled away, but was cut short as their mouths connected again in a heated kiss. There was a brief pause before she felt Brittany's fingers sliding down inside her underwear and between her legs. Santana was already so wet and the way Brittany moaned into her mouth when she felt that was just making it worse. Not worse, better. She pulled her hands out of the other girl's shirt so she could shove her jeans down of her hips, moving the restrictive fabric away to give Brittany better use of her hand.
It was a good thing Santana was backed up against a wall, the way her knees kept threatening to give out with ever twitch or flick of her girlfriend's fingers. She actually did slump against it a little as Brittany pushed two fingers into her, keeping her thumb pressed against her clit as those fingers pumped in and out slowly. Her hands gripped onto Brittany's shoulders to keep herself steady, and she kissed along her jaw, sucking on the pulse point below her ear enough to make her moan. That was only fair, considering how Brittany's fingers were stroking inside her just so and making her feel like every muscle in her body was tightening fit to explode.
Her teeth dug into Brittany's skin a little before she pulled away with a cry, her body arching off the wall as she went over the edge, her orgasm hitting her hard. She trembled as she came back down, slowly loosening her grip on her girlfriend's shoulders and lifting her head up to look at her. That look in Brittany's eyes, that pure love, it was more than Santana had ever dreamed of having. Her breath was ragged, but she pulled her in and kissed her deeply; a slow, tender kiss like they'd had before.
Santana broke away as her body trembled in an aftershock. She reached down, tugging her jeans back up into place before running her hands along Brittany's sides. "What do you say," she started, her voice rough, and she paused to brush a lightly kiss across her lips, "you show me my new room, and I'll show you just how glad I am to be here."
A grin broke out across Brittany's face and she linked her pinky with Santana's, leading her back further into the apartment.